₦airaland Forum

coogar:
what are the odds that such would happen? i have never been admitted to a hospital before. the worst i have had is A & E and I walked away within few hours.

if i break a bone, i can work from home. many contractors do. is it not to log in via intranet & do what you gotta do? abeg, cash is king anytime anyday & i have more control of it than a permie.

You see I'm saying you are not thinking strategic. If you have family nko? Bobo yii omode ni e. Contractor would pay tuition for 3 kids in US university or medicals for immediate family?

AVPs in very profitable investment banks can earn up to 100k as bonus albeit pre tax. You a contractor on the same level would open mouth.

You don't log in via intranet mate. You log in via VPN! Regulatory controls are changing, information protection is key. Most companies will not grant a contractor remote access these days.

Anyway whatever floats your boat. But on the long run, I'd prefer a Permanent role with very juicy benefits.

coogar:
contracting is still the better option. it gives me more control & i can manipulate my taxes to the barest minimum.

besides, the contractor can claim expenses for all of their work-related equipment, things like tablets, mobile phones, office equipment, laptops, internet connections and so on.

as for paid holidays, a contractor earns more than enough he can save to afford any holiday he wants. on items that come with VATs alone, a contractor can can offset against their input VAT charged on their invoices, representing a further discount compared to what the permanent staff pays.

I'm talking strategic you're talking operational! Even if you earn £2000 a day, some permanent roles with better perks are way better. If you go and play 5 a side football tomorrow and you break a bone. You are doomed if you are contractor. And, that's also the africanness in you doing the talking. Give me all those benefits I'm good to go!

SirShymex:
Contracting is sweet apart from the dormant periods when there is nothing. And you know how quick money goes. You will spend about £10,000 within two months without knowing. Especially when your lifestyle goes up due to ya earnings.

That is why most folks prefer steady money or any business that brings money in on the regs.

There are people that have been contracting for years and not out of job for once. That’s why you have to acquire specialist skills that will make you indispensable. More so, with that kind of money you realistically only have to work like 8 months a year.

Mind you, do not underestimate the perquisites that comes with Permanent roles. It’s the ‘africanness’ in us that makes us think the company that’s paying £500/day is a maga, the company will be like this new employee is ode for taking this chicken change. If you have benefits that gives you accommodation in choice areas, bottomless medical allowance, your choice of company car that would be sold to you at a ridiculous price after 2 year use, tuition for your kids up to university anywhere in the world, and annual bonus for your efforts. You’ll realise you are short changing yourself by contracting. That’s why you see some people working in the same place for the past 25 years polishing their pension pot.

SirShymex:
Lmao...nice. I just used to think it's difficult to do, since I know companies don't pay contractors in cash. So the money can easily be traced. But I like it though lol.

Asians have also mastered that ish with the way they run their corner shops.

Bro everybody does it...that's what makes contracting enticing to people. You can even spend all the money just make sure you can produce it when its time to file your returns.

SirShymex:
I know how company tax.

However, with what you just posted. That means you won't declare your source of income if you are basically going to put minimum wage in there, when you are earning far more than that. I get it now.

It basically means you are exploiting loopholes in the tax system to your best advantage. You can liken it to people like Sir Phillip Green and Lewis Hamilton who are not resident in UK...so they are exempt from UK tax. Something most multinational companies do as well by having their Headoffice in in tax efficient economies and trading elsewhere. It's all legit. Taxation is beautiful!

coogar:
i will pay you a visit next week.

Nice will be looking out for you...I have done fuckall today not doing this anymore soon.

coogar:
how do i ask of you there?
cos i am sure you used a jamaican passport to secure the job.

Just come to the one Old kent road, ask for Ralph Tresvant

coogar:
O.O ko, Q.Q ni.
wonlash, abeg e don do. you have turned this whole conversation from what it is to your personal agenda.

you don't know me...whatever you think you know is pure fückery. not even the intelligence agencies know me. so keep aiming your dane gun hoping you would score.

eeeerr, can i come visit you at tescos? i am missing their croissant.

lol you are free to come anytime.. we be paddy for jungle na. I go even add chicken wings

coogar:
how can you search under my name when you don't know my name? you are funny, boy! i hope you are not stüpid enough to search under coogar's name.....

is that what you did?

You really think I'm daft abi. Are you not O.O? bobo yii make you dey look face abeg
BTW are do you do this all day everyday? I'm tired meeeen.

coogar:
i need googling to know what IR35 is?
is this your hidden admission that HMRC tax codes are complex for contractors?

wonlash, this is how to expose a mediocre lying in public that he knows how things work. you have the mental capacity of a slug.

like i said, holla @ me when tesco sacks you.

Bobo stop exposing yourself unnecessarily i have been trying to cover your shame but you keep coming back. You know I searched tax returns under your name for the past 15 years and you filed £zilch. In essence, it means you don't work as a contractor. So, you are bullshiiting! I can substantiate this if you dare me. Gerrout jare. Except you are Testing NL web interface

^^^stop asking silly questions and stop googling. I have been explaining things to you since he is asking about IR35...emi?

Anyways, it's been good having this banter with you. I'have been multitasking here and I have headache back to my siddon look mode.

You know I said you make a lot of bullshyte look nice earlier. This one above is one of them, you have this unique skillset complex tax code on taxables... I have been laughing like a roasted Eid ram here

What's so complex on expenses must be wholly reasonable and exclusively incurred for the business...i don't know you to be less intelligent mate atleast in football.

Yeah I agree I'm a drop out atleast I don't tell porkies about my alma mater!

You want the post code to the hmrc office I work? baba suwe mode again lmao

Shymex he has answered you jare. I'm typing this behind tesco shelves

coogar:
it's because they are contract jobs. most jobs won't overlap & as there are always gaps in between. something has to be tidying you up while you are out of job & expecting the next one.

besides, the rates quoted are before tax. contractors are self-employed. so you are given the responsibility of paying your taxes yourself(through your own accountant), NI contributions, pension, etc. so the take home pay is lower than what you see.




so you now agree contractors pay corporation tax contrary to the bullshyte you spewed earlier on like i just fabricated the term from nowhere. i never said corporation tax on its own are complex or whatever nonsense you are spewing - i am saying all the taxes attached to setting up a company to be a contractor is very complex.

i go through this ambiguity with my accountant every year.




which school is that? iree poly?



so you agree testers can get £500/day now but you just cannot see how coogar can get it?


we are getting somewhere.

You are a layman. What is so complex in calculating 20% of your earning after deduction of allowable expenses. I never said you don't pay Corp tax...you mentioned complex tax code that term there gave you out.

You get accountant lmao this guy is baba suwe

Coogar continue sweet talking Oloshos on this NL. You were/are not a Tester! Take it from me. I'm a custodian of HMRC returns

coogar:
so one has to earn anything close to £300k pa to pay corporation tax? at this juncture, i doubt you have ever been to school sef.

when you are tired of working the shelves at tesco express, holla @ me. without derailing from the track that brought you here.....is it possible to earn £500/day as a tester without prior experience? yes it is!

you admitted that yourself when you used the cowboy term!

Bobo yii you are digging a hole for yourself here. Ok listen let me teach you something today.. I never said you won't pay corporation tax but it's not complex mate it's just 20% per annum it gets complex when your financial year straddles 2 accounting periods and you earn above £300k P.A.

Na you no go school, heck I even know the school you went to..case for another day.

You can get £500/day as tester but you, my friend haven't earned that in this life but no one knows tomorrow.

coogar:
so as a contractor, i don't pay corporation tax? i am not even sure you know how these things work.......

stop bluffing aburo....you don't earn anything that will put you in the threshold of complex corporate tax calculations. Abi you don dey make £300,000 per year now. Wo, go and sit down jare. If you wan bragggado make you dey look face

coogar:
please do it......
lemme know how much you rogues have been stealing from me with your complex tax codes. bunch of rogues!

You just shot yourself in the foot mate. Aren't you supposed to be contracting. Bro, let's just forget this ish.. You are still one of the best ashewos here.

coogar:
buhahahaha
after getting murked, this is all you got. i am sure you're going to visit your friends tonight - they have been lying to you that the market is bad & thus no freebies for you.

your mates are in that industry earning £1,000 per day & you are whining over £350/day. wonlash, go and rewrite your CV & find someone that will tutor you on how to ace interviews.

Guy, trust me if I tell you what I know you will deactivate this account. If I tell you I have unlimited access to your tax returns in hmrc in the last 15 years nko. Please don't let me do this.

ROTFLMAO coogar. Let me leave you to bask in your delusion. I don't want to block all your pussiies on NL. Enjoy your £500/day testing jobs.

StarBoard:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2793741/antonio-valencia-injury-no-9-manchester-united-tweaking-hamstring.html

we are cursed with the injuries.
Whome we offend?Moyes?

He got injured during sexting

coogar:
so you actually expect an intelligent boy like me to carry a virgin CV into the software tech industry that is as porous as anything? no wonder you struggle to get jobs. you really think all those asians have the 8-year experience their CV says?

and yes....
that was my first job as a tester. i defended my CV to the T with verifiable references. i always had my friend on BBM whenever i ran into a brick wall & he bailed me out. within about 2 weeks, i met 3 other nigerians in my circle & the rest is history.

siddon there make boxers dey wear you.
the last dude i did phone interview for had only be in the UK for few months. he got the role (£350/day - 6 months contract). no prior knowledge, no experience, he didn't even have ISEB certificate. if you want a job, holla @ me.



sharrrap & stop talking like an amateur.
there are software testers that are on £500/day - different companies, different rates. you need to know how this industry works. what you see on jobserve are agent rates, they are very negotiable.

i always tell them what my last rate was in the previous job & i will not go below it. it's a take it or leave it matter. sometimes they call back, sometimes they don't. i can show you plenty of examples in my email right now of various job offers that even come with awoof £300 if i recommend an employee for them.

Seriously, I will give it you you are very intelligent as per football matters and you are very gifted in making whole lot of bullshyte look nice.

You are a cowboy and obviously you were coached but you weren't briefed about cowboys' rules of engagement. Most of the people that earn that much don't even talk about which brings me to the conclusion that you are still a searching rookie.

Forget about asians they are all patel!

You also said you did interview for someone and he got a 350 a day job...really if the dunce can't do phone interview, how will he do face-to-face? you don't want to tell me its just phone interview to land 350 a day job. Coogs please dont bullshiit the bullshiiter!

Forget about getting me a job, you can't do in this life or the next. I'm your master!

If at all you are even a contractor, how were you paid? please dont say paye

Coogar i'm coming to treat your Bleep up just wait for a while i know you are still in bed

coogar:
how would it be exposed?
i was properly tutored by someone who was already in the job for about a week, he designed the CV for me & laid out the likely interview questions & how to defend the CV i was presenting....




manual/automated
selenium
jmeter
QTP and so on & forth.

and no, the role wasn't a lead tester....it was test analyst!

Next time don't come with your first tester role and you make 400/ day. You faked 5 years cognate experience.

I don't really have time to be going back and forth with you cos I'm a bit busy. But, you and I know you lied on the pay rate. How much do you expect them to pay the Solution designers, the architects, and the project manager if they pay you ordinary bug detector £400/day. (and It'd will be clear as a day to any experienced lead tester that you were faking it) and you forgot to tell us how many minutes you lasted at the job

coogar:
you have a problem with comprehension!
i was a rookie with the CV of a mid-veteran. it's the easiest job in the world, i could have coped with it when i was in SS2.

the difference between me & a jew like you is - i run circles around problems while you jump feet first into it. if you want a testing job this month, holla @ me......you can start with £600/day

Abeg abeg drop your veteran status. There's no way you are rookie and you will take up lead tester position even after a creative CV. Your ass would be exposed.

I asked again professional tester mr Coogar...which area of testing did you make 400 a day? Non functional/functional --manual or automation?

coogar:
you don't get my drift....

the first ever testing job i got was £400/day. i had no prior experience apart from a friend who told me about it, built a CV & can't coached me on how to respond to interview questions. on my CV, i had 5 years experience but in reality, i had 0 experience + few youtube tutorials.

only junior testers(fresh from college) would be contented with £180/day. besides, the wages quoted is pre-tax - a contractor is self-emoloyed. he still has to hire an accountant to sort out his tax with inland revenue & stuff. it's completely possible for anyone(non-graduate) to earn up to £500/day as long as he can defend the CV he's presenting to his interviewers.

What area of Testing were you paid 400 a day as a rookie? Clean the lies on your mouth away.

That's the vita duh.

Who are the retarrds making these threads? who is going to give you 100million? which are account are they going to debit? what is their benefit if you renounce your faith? who give a shiitt?

solomonbrown64:
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssss.....
Walcott is freaking back.......

It won't make a freaking difference. He would just be a good touch-line runner as usual, nothing more.

raumdeuter:
Coogar,

Your Costa and fabregas don lose to Slovakia o

Excuses on why the best linkup on earth that would have saved Torres couldnt deliver vs SLovakia

Please don't start this argument again I beg you...it always cost us pages here

NL is enjoying the traffic that would have otherwise gone to LIB.

What of those who threaten you like...'if you don't send this to 10 people you will not....'

my people should start bleaching ooo