₦airaland Forum

Seasons greetings! Campus blues is now how many years old?? Madame Lola.luv, we miss you a lot, you know. I still have hope oh, for the story to END!

Hybee2493: Spank her hard anytime she does it

Uhm, ahem, spanking an angered babe...hmm. You want her to chew my ears off?
Is that what you would do?

Hello everyone. Compliments of the season!

I'm in a predicament with milady. We've been dating for some months now, started off as a shoulder to lean on and all, the feelings came and then . . . bam! We're here. Things are naturally heading in the commitment direction but the problem is she has a hot head: seems to pick offence at the most little of issues and I'm not liking it.

Luckily however, I do not get worked up easily, had enough anger growing up that could have caused great havoc but I am totally free now. You might say opposites attract but we have a ton of common ground and as much as I admire her "mad face", it's not usually an easy situation to manage.

Now I ask: what do I do? What can help me with this? I even told her to imagine if she were a dude that babes would have suffered at her hands. Has any of you been in such a fix? What did you do?

I tend to get really uncomfortable when the lady feels like she knows all there is to know about me. That just can't be (I surprise myself sometimes!)
Anyway, I dislike a cunny partner, nosiness, a lady that can't hold her tongue or who makes those demands (quality time & dough). A combination of these spells...buzz! C'est fin!

Hello everyone. Compliments of the season!

I'm in a predicament with milady. We've been dating for some months now, started off as a shoulder to lean on and all, the feelings came and then . . . bam! We're here. Things are naturally heading in the commitment direction but the problem is she has a hot head: seems to pick offence at the most little of issues and I'm not liking it.

The good thing is that I do not easily get vexed, had enough anger growing up that could have caused great havoc but I am totally free now. So I guess opposites attract and as much as I admire her "mad face", it's not usually an easy situation to manage.

Now I ask: what do I do? What can help me with this? I even told her to imagine if she were a guy, babes would have suffered at her hands. Has any of you been in such a fix? What did you do?

ednut1: hahahahah sick dude, d slim gal abi

Oga nut, abeg send me the koko too make I no go dey stare at the ladies there. My mail add is: emilegan@gmail.com. Thanks man.

trendylem: Sent!

Biko nwanem, send me the questions/answers too. My add is: emilegan@gmail.com. Thanks a dozen.

On a second note, my previous post was all too carnal and unwise. At the OP, as much as we all made and will make mistakes, I believe you are on the right path already because you have acknowledged your error. Next thing would be to ask God for forgiveness because fornication is a sin. The fact that illegitimate sex happens everywhere today doesn't make it right.
If you're a Catholic, Christian or Moslem, you need grace to live above sin. Only the Almighty can provide that. I'm not perfect, no one is but we can strive to be through God's help.
That is my 2cents.

Jesus is Lord!

Snoggy: The guy isn't good in bed. That's why you're complaining here.

Now I feel this is spot on. It's either he isn't hitting it right or u're fallin for him when he isn't even thinking of such.
The solution would be to decide what you wanna do: is the sex worth staying for or the man worth remaining in the rltnshp for. I hope this helps.

I feel ur pain OP. These relationships are especially hard and I know where you're coming from. Nevertheless, your guy seems to have gotten out of this picture: he is off you. As much as you've still got feelings for him & want the relationship to work, do not waste your time.
He might still feel smtg for you but he doesn't seem to want you and you can't force him even if you two work in the same place. I'd advice you to just lay off him and take care of you cuz there's prbly someone much more deserving of you at the door right now, a man who'd cherish and love you.

[quote author=lana_Vello]Guilty as charged...

Buh both parties have bad sides....Ladies aint easy to please either,especially wit that idea of not saying exactly what they want[/quote]Mahn, that's a big issue. However, I believe they do know what they want but finding the words to express it to us is almost always a herculean task.

tatiana009: Nothing worse than a guy you've known for just weeks telling you constantly that I can marry you in a few months! Seriously? Its like they think all you need to get any woman above 24 into bed is the slightlest hint of marriage!

The last dude that tried that I simply saved his number as Never Pick.

Erm, madame, seems you're harsh oh. How about if the dude in question has "seen" that you're his wife? Stuff like that is written on screens & walls u knw! Haha.

hannne: 1. If he calls you and your phone
is off, he thinks you’re cheating….
then he sends sms saying“don’t
tell me the battery story coz I
know that line”
2. If u TREAT him nicely, he says u
are...
TOO IN LOVE, moving too fast;
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD
3. If u DRESS NICELY, he says u are
trying to LURE other men; If u
DON'T, he says u are RURAL.
4. If u ARGUE with him, he says u are
STUBBORN, too manly; If u keep
QUIET, he says
u have no
BRAINS, a walkover;
5. If u are SMARTER than him, you’re
a SHOW-
OFF; If he's SMARTER than u, he is
GREAT.
6. If u don't LOVE him, he tries to
POSSESS u; If
u LOVE him, He takes you FOR
GRANTED. (very
true
huh?)
7. If u don't MAKE LOVE to him, he
says u
DON'T LOVE him; If u DO, he says u
are
CHEAP...
8. If u tell him your PROBLEMS , he
says u are TROUBLE; If u DON'T, he
says u don't TRUST him.
9. If u SCOLD him, u are treating him
like a
CHILD; If he SCOLDS u, it ’s because
he CARES
for u.
10. If u BREAK your promise, u
cannot be TRUSTED; If he BREAKS
his, it is circumstances beyond his
CONTROL.
(yea rite!)
11. If u SMOKE, u are a BAD girl; If
he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMAN.
12. If u do WELL in your career,
it's LUCK ; If he does WELL, it’s
definitely BRAINS. (luck?)
13. If u HURT him, u are CRUEL; If he
HURTS you, you are too SENSITIVE !!
HOW ARE WOMEN
SUPPOSED TO GET IT RIGHT?? #copied#

It comes with the package my dear, don't fret over it. Haha.
Nonetheless, I'd say that a man who treats a loving lady that way simply doesn't feel the same way about her. There are men out there (and here) who cherish their ladies, even when dating not to even talk of their wives. I have personal and secondary experiences.
Love is a beautiful thing and being deeply in love with a lady who feels the same way is 2nd to none!

I thank each and everyone that has contributed to the topic (the bizarre, odd and intuitive comments especially). Thank you.

Kamdi2013: Run from the fire before you are consumed. She is now married and out of your reach; encourage her to stick to her husband and leave you alone.
Should you try it and the husband catches you, you go know how far!

Ol'boy, I no wan know how far o! And I won't wanna have such happening with my wife when I'm settled. The issue still remains what to tell her anyway because I can't just tell her to back off me neither can I keep acting like I don't see the hidden lines.
Seems I already have a path to follow as it is. I am grateful for the comment. Thank you.

Onyinyechimara: The only opinion you are waiting for is permission to commit adultery......since that is what you want to hear.

Mtcheeeew

Uncommon sense is so common

Far from it ma'am, far from it. This is not a case of some catch, she was The Flame, The Love, why would having intercourse with her freak me now?! We had a real relationship and not a fling or tryst. Get your facts straight please. The bottomline is would you support a married person who's befriending an old flame? **For whatever reason that is**

I have learnt that the best route to tread after such a relationship is the natural course that comes. You would wallow, wish she comes back, get bothered but then be at a point where a decision has to be made: living in the past or moving on totally!
You gotta know what exactly you want bro. That is key to what ensues afterward.

stag: Pls, in one sentence kindly tell us why u opened this thread.

Fvkin attention seeker! Thread closed

Haha. I like ur reasoning: it's quite ubiquitous on this forum. Nonetheless, I intended getting opinions from people and it is apparently yielding fruits. Thanks for ur 1cent.

[quote author=Still_stan]For me...I think its normal to miss an x depending on the xtent u both went but u jst have to keep it neutral and open...if u must be friends to her...u have to also be friends to the husband and family as a whole...also deleting her number and trying very hard not to answer to her calls doesn't depict maturity...u can answer her calls and still and still handle every other issue that might come out of it maturedly....she might have a dirty mindset but u as a man and knowing what u want can still make her understand reality better and become best of friends with u with nothing attatched....wish u all d best![/quote]Succinctly said. Thank you. On the contrary though, I initiated the conversations at first, before she got hooked that is but as soon as I realised it was not wise dwelling on her and wishing something happened, I resolved to keep my distance.
Deleted the number when I felt we had to move on full-time: her with her husband and me with my life. Nonetheless, whenever she calls, I pick it up of course.

tellwisdom: Na for where she hit you??

Bros, na for ear oh! E sound wella.
The thing is that it's been going on for a while now and I can't just tell her off as it is. What would you have done?

Chinwem: Funny how people never know what to do when it comes to adultery

Till they discover the other person has HIV or is on ARVs, then they suddenly know what to do

Hmm. A little dramatic, don't you think? Matters like these are not always so black and white you know.
I understand where you are coming from, however, but you did not say what you would do if in my shoes!

MENTORCH: If she misses you, that doesn't mean she wants you to get down with her bro, I feel she just wants you to still be free with her even if she is married.

Yep, you have a point there. But how can I be free with an ex lover? After how many years and the period of recovery? Nah bro. Can you be free with a married woman?
I appreciate it.

190: SMASH that punny my friend

dont let that punny escape

or i'll deal with you personally

Hmm. Better start with it now because I ain't gon' do that. TaAh! Except if you're talking about smashing some tennis balls! Haha. Thanks all the same.

[quote author=Duke_Nija]Wow! Seems ur relationship was quite intimate. Uve experience what millions of people might never feel. Haarsh fact. Just don't panic, she hasn't given off yet. Just be normal.[/quote]If you could see the look I have right now...#proud. You are spot on with that. Most of the people I talked to about her and the relationship were befuddled at how I spoke about us and our amicable break-up. I rmba a close female friend was at a loss for words. I was that lucky.
However, she is married now and I am not ready to tow the adulterous line for anyone/thing although my current relationship is pretty nascent and we seem to be going back and forth a lot in just a few months.
I thank you. Grateful much.

The fact is I could have proposed to her even while we were dating. It was that serious with us and we almost started up again less than a year after the break-up. Yeah.

walakolobo: she merely said she miss you and you are already having an ereeeection. Haba. Is it a sin to express that she misses you? That is not the same as saying she wants you back. Have a free mind boo and act like a man. It seems its you who hasnt been able to get rid of the feelings. Deal with it and move on dude.

Haha. You have quite an imagination there but that's not quite how it goes. It has been going on for a while and as much as I have moved on, it does not mean thoughts of her do not cross my mind. Seems you left it out that she is married now and I am not. All the same, I appreciate your 2cents.

Idowuogbo: You hit him back! Infact, give am better woozing.

Badosky, I didn't get that. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

*And I thank you for gracing this thread your womanliness!*

ilibrarian: She belongs to your past. Move on

Thank you. I definitely won't wanna go through all I went through the last time and it's simply a different ball game now.

Chiidi:

why would a married ex still be hitting

Time end things

Yeah. The grass ain't always greener on the other side I believe.

Na wa o! This is like the last post I expected to see. Somewhat mind-boggling but I guess knowledge isn't wasted. Kudos.

[quote author=tpia@]If you don't want to do then don't .


She will move on to the next boyfriend if you don't answer her.[/quote]You are funny man. Do what exactly - adultery?? Nah, those are some waters I never wanna even see. What would you do?

holumoney: U av nutin 2 do dan 2 4get ur past,@least all d year dat u two broke up,u sha did nt die.so u av 2 move on with ur life bro u gat no damm choice

Haha. Thank you and I like how you put it there. However, she now seems to be wallowing in what I also went through. Thanks again.