₦airaland Forum

Top 10 Reasons Why People Hate America
by 'An Ugly American'

Its obvious to any American that a lot of the world harbors some kind of hate or strong dislike for Americans. Most Americans have done nothing as individuals to earn anyone's animosity. But why? We stormed the beaches at Normandy, saved Europe from economic ruin with the Marshall plan, invented the Internet, uprooted tyrants, and give foreign aid away like it was candy. We want to be the good guys and thought we were. Yet we just can’t seem to get any love these days. How’d we get here?

10. America, Center Of The Universe. We act like the world revolves around us. America presumes much for a country generously dated at 300 years old. China has latrines ten times older than that. A quick example: many countries play baseball, but only we have the “World Series”. We’re getting better about our egocentrism, but it’s been a loooong time coming. And don’t get me started about our tourists. Just smile and take the money- they’re loud, but they’ll be gone in a week.

9 We Win Everything. Okay, I’ll concede Vietnam, tennis (but we don’t care) and Kenyan marathon runners. But we win damn near everything else, eventually. The Space Race. The Cold War. Tour de France. The list goes on and on. Even we hate the Olympics now that our professionals are allowed to participate straight up with the under-aged/doping communist nations. It’s boring for us, but as a Red Sox/Bolton Wanderers fan, I know the angst that chronic losing against bigger and better funded opponents generates. And if we don’t have the best athletes/scientists/entertainers, we’ll make sure they get a chance to immigrate while others wait in line. That’s got to sting. Oh, Yao Ming and Ichiro say “Hi”.

8. We Eat Everything. Why? Because we can. Americans are the second fattest industrialized nation per capita (sorry, Australia). But as always, we make up for it in volume. We can afford automobiles so we don’t ride bikes or walk anywhere except for fun, and thanks to abundant agricultural surpluses, ANYTHING we want to eat is readily available from takeaway restaurants and convenience stores. Some of our refrigerators could hide an entire human body. And we like the fatty stuff, because fat tastes good. This is NOT a good thing, and our global franchises (KFC, McDonald’s) are already infecting nations that traditionally had healthier diets (are you listening, Japan?)

7. We Made and Have Nukes. The United States is the inventor and only wartime practitioner of nuclear weapons (never mind that using them prevented an invasion that would make the Iraqi insurgency look like a hand job. “Operation Downfall”, the now-declassified US plan to invade Japan, had an estimated 1 Million American casualties alone). Lax security protocols (and clever spying) spread the secret to the USSR and after that the genie got out of the bottle. Many countries now have atomic weapons, and with no clear Cold War counterpart to US supremacy, the balance has shifted, and the peace dividend has not been kind post 9/11.

6. Natural Resources. Though accounting for only 5 percent of the world’s population, Americans consume 26 percent of the world’s energy. (American Almanac), and we are the world’s largest single emitter of carbon dioxide, accounting for 23 percent of energy-related carbon emissions worldwide. (U.S. Department of Energy). This, while worldwide, some 2 billion people are currently without electricity. (U.S. Department of Energy). The good news is that among industrialized and developing countries, Canada consumes per capita the most energy in the world, and the United Sates is only second. Italy consumes the least among industrialized countries (that’s because they still drive Fiats, which “conserve” energy by breaking every other day).

5. International Meddling. The United States has the most advanced army in the world. We station our military in other countries at their “request”, which is a source of much seething and hurt national pride. From Banana Republics, to the Cold War, to the War on Terror, we routinely interfere in the business of other countries to make the world safe for our interests, whether anybody asked for it or not. Even if the intentions are both right and good, many countries resent our involvement in their affairs on sheer principle: they’d rather f*** it up themselves. Are you listening, North Korea?

4. We Export Trash Culture. A thriving market economy and near total freedom of expression liberate Americans to pursue almost every endeavor imaginable, resulting in some of the greatest discoveries and inventions in the history of man, from the first practical light bulb to powered flight, polio vaccines, radio and TV, space exploration, the Internet, and unfortunately, everything in between. So that means ubercrap like Jerry Springer and Britney Spears gets exported worldwide. No, I’m being too kind there– “force fed” worldwide. Other cultures despise this with a mix of dread, envy, and loathing. They can’t figure out how to cull the good from the bad out of this torrent (neither can we, btw)—but once it takes hold, it won’t let go. This what the Islamic world fears most. Tanks, they understand. An educated, employed woman Hot and clubbing on Friday night they simply can’t fathom. And it scares the crap out of them.

3. It’s Fashionable. Despite the hyperbole bandied online, strong political opinions won’t get your door kicked in at 3 AM like in the Gulag Archipelago. There are no Stalinist purges or killing fields here. And the FBI/CIA/ATF/DEA/PTA will not shoot you on sight simply because you speak against The Surge or march against the Economic Stimulus Plan. But it’s certainly fun to claim a fear of it! You become an instant radical and feel intellectually enlightened to boot– patriotism is an uncritical, reflexive act, right?– only a deep thinker would hate his country (yet stay on to enjoy its privileges). And don’t worry about proof, because all that matters is the accusation. Volume and conviction win the day, so toss that bibliography—grab half the story and make the rest up. If you get caught in a logic box, claim satire. Other countries see this lack of consequences and pile on.

2. We Don’t Finish the Job. From Vietnam to Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinski to “Mission Accomplished” in Iraq to finding Osama Bin Laden, we seem to do most of the work, but keep a lot of things hanging on, never quite finished. Eventually the answer makes itself known, but it usually takes time, and involves help from others after a lot of (necessary) heated discussions. Maybe we should try this as a first course of action more often.

1. We Act Unilaterally. We are a nation of doers, and our errors (when they occur) will be from acts of commission, not omission (Hypocrisy Alert: Darfur). Sometimes that’s a great thing, like sending Kruschev’s missiles back home, breaking Gaddafi’s/Qaddafi’s/Kaddafi’s nuclear ambitions (his nukes are now safely tucked away in Oak Ridge, Tennessee), or winning the Cold War. Other times, it blows up in our (and often, YOUR) face. Our attempts to spread democracy worldwide, intended to let others enjoy the same freedoms and advantages that we have, sometimes result in innocent people dying. We must stop to remember the Somalia embassy, Madrid and Fiji and Lockerbie 101 bombings, along with the millions of nameless others who suffered and died in countries that are not free. The US is the biggest face opposing these things that actually does anything (not just talk, FRANCE. You railed about Guantanamo but when it came time to release prisoners you took ONE.), but our allies often bear the brunt of our “foreign” wars, because the enemy cannot reach us. That has changed recently, and while it has altered our perspective, it has not altered our resolve.

So there you have it! The Top 10 Reasons People Hate America.

Source: listserve.com

In the article "Should Nigeria Be Re-Colonized?" by Jideofor Adibe, he asked the question:

"If there is a referendum for Nigeria to be re-colonized, how would you vote – YES or NO?"

Below are two responses to his question:

YES says nkateobiamaka.

"This question that you asked has been bothering me since I myself visited South Africa in 2008. I was indeed amazed at the level of development. Good roads, potable cold & water from the tap and the infrastructure are same with the developed world. I then regretted the hurried independence that has left us in the malaise and in this season of our anomie that we have found ourselves. I am a strong advocate of re-colonization. I am tired of living in the 18th century. I am not an illiterate. I possess a PhD, but life has not dealt us a fair deal in Nigeria. I was in Zimbabwe immediately they got their independence. They were well developed."

NO says C. Achodo.

"...rather than ask to re-colonise Nigeria, we should demand the outsourcing of governance of our public and social sector in Nigeria. We can leave the politics for Nigerian political elite but outsource the management of the economy to a group of international development institutions and agencies with clear terms of reference regarding what we want them to accomplish within a 10-15years period and with clear undertaking that the rights of Nigerian should be protected. Outsourcing Nigeria is the best solution if we are to catch up. UAE virtually works on this strategy so also other nations. They may not call it outsourcing but they have always sourced international companies to deliver on critical national infrastructure and services."

How would YOU vote?

Source: http://www.dailytrust.com.ng/daily/columns/thursday-columns/122-re-should-nigeria-be-re-colonized

drnoel:
If only u weren't reading it with ur ass, u would have known what my comment has to do with the topic. A pity I can't help u there cos decided on ur own to be silly.

...and what is being insulting have to do with topic?

Maybe you can't help yourself...could be your nature. Who knows.

Anyways...carry on.

I'll leave the last word for you.

Enjoy it!

Why do some men divorce their aging wives and go on to marry younger ones?

Aren't men supposed to love their wives for her character and not just for her looks?

If wives can overlook their husbands' sagging butts, pot bellies, man boobs, bald heads, greying hair, hairy ears/noses and flagging libidos and still love and respect them, why can't their husbands overlook their wives' bodies, forever changed by childbirth, weight gain, celluite, greying hair, wrinkles and waning interest in the bedmatics of her youth?

If some husbands are divorcing their old wives and running off to marry younger women, and other men their ages are running after younger women, just what are these First Wives supposed to do for companionship or look to, if they want to remarry?

Should they...

...resign themselves to being lonely for the rest of their lives and just concentrate on their grandkids, if they have any?

...throw themselves into church, civic and charitable activities, in hopes that keeping busy will alleviate their longing for human companionship?

...toss their hats back into the Dating Pool and hope some suitable man will bite?

...become some younger man's 'Sugar Mommy' and risk being thought of as a desperate, foolish old woman?

Or...wither away on the vine, hoping against hope that the husbands they loved and respected for so many years will come to their senses and come back home where he belongs?

drnoel:
U won't till the light shines on u. U need a new baptism of fire and reorientation. Pity u have to do so urself. Try ya best and hope on god.

...and this has what to do with the topic?

bukatyne:
@OP:

Nice writeup.

Same can be said for black women bashing black men etc.

It was referenced by her, comparing the bashing between white wo/men and the bashing between Black wo/men...

"Come to think of it, White wo/men who bash each other are out of their league, when it comes to Black men wo/men bashing each other. They can't compete."

...and by her husband at the end of the letter.

"P.S. "Same goes for Black Women who bash Black Men!" - From Her Husband, Mr. Davidson"

RentedReality:
Being a Nigerian isn't an excuse for rejection\challenges getting 'f's.

It's easier out there, it costs you less dating as almost everyone is self dependent. Remember: always play the whites against the blacks and vice versa.

9ja girls there get jealous seeing u with whites and it's the other way round for them blue eyed 'f's.

Play both sides of the coin right and you won't come here posting this.

I'm back home but I still have some faithfuls waiting for my return. I advise you do the same m8.

Pardon?

I don't get what you're saying.

cococandy:
You forgot to add their favorite. Gold diggers And their mothers are not included o

I think the letter mentioned Black women being materialistic.

"And why is it some Black men claim that Black women are too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage yet many times end up White women with the same characteristics? Women are women."

Would "gold diggers" be another way of saying "materialistic"?

But, I agree, these men's mothers aren't specifically mentioned, just a reference to " female folk".

She's on point with the other stuff though!

What dating challenges have you encountered since you immigrated?

Have you ever been rejected by a potential date because you're a Nigerian or a member of any other African ethnic group?

From what you've experienced in the Dating Game, which race, ethnic group or gender has been more open to dating Nigerians or a member of any other African ethnic group?

Do you believe that past behavior is a predictor of future behavior?

Average people think MONEY is the root of all evil.

Rich people believe POVERTY is the root of all evil.

What do YOU think?

Why International Students Should Consider Community Colleges

American community colleges offer international students a cheaper entry point into their higher education pursuits via low tuition rates on freshman and sophomore level classes, often with the added bonus of an easier transition to U.S.-style academics, experts say. Students then transfer to four-year schools to complete their bachelor's degree.

Read more here: http://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/articles/2012/10/04/why-international-students-should-consider-community-colleges __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Consider a Community College When Studying in the United States

International students who are planning to study in the United States should consider studying at a community college when they begin their undergraduate studies. Many educational choices are available in the United States, including private colleges, state colleges, major universities, technical/trade schools, and community colleges; however, international students may be unfamiliar with the concept of a "community college" since they are not often found in many countries of the world. In fact, community colleges have their origin in the U.S., where they are both numerous and successful.

Read more here: http://www.americancommunitycolleges.com/isg_articles/consider-communitycollege.php
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The 50 Best Community Colleges in the United States

Walt Disney … George Lucas … Halle Berry … Tom Hanks … Astronaut Eileen Collins … Black & Decker CEO Nolan Archibald … Arnold Schwarzenegger … author Amy Tan … fashion designer Monique Lhuillier … NBC news anchor Brian Williams …Community college grads, all!

Read more here: http://www.thebestschools.org/blog/2013/05/28/50-community-colleges-united-states/
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The International Student Guide to the United States of America

The International Student Guide to the United States of America is a print and online resource for students who are interested in studying in the USA. If you choose to study in the USA, there are a multitude of educational choices: colleges, universities, junior colleges, community colleges, English as a Second Language (ESL) programs and graduate programs.

Read more here: http://www.internationalstudentguidetotheusa.com/
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What International Students Should Expect From a Community College

For the past few years the fastest growing enrollments of international students in the United States have taken place on the campuses of America's community colleges. One of the great treasures of American higher education, the community college system has now begun to be discovered by students from all over the world who see the advantages of institutions that are convenient, affordable, innovative, and ready to admit students from other countries.

Read more here: http://www.americancommunitycolleges.com/isg_articles/service.php
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Community Colleges in the USA

Approximately 13 million students are enrolled in community colleges across the United States. Nearly 45% of all students earning a bachelor’s degree attended a community college.

Read more here: http://studyusa.com/en/a/51/community-colleges-in-the-usa
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Community Colleges with On-Campus Housing

These colleges have housing so you can get out on your own. Colleges vary in the numbers of students housed. At some, the majority live on campus, while at others only a small percentage of students do so.

Read more here: http://www.collegexpress.com/lists/list/community-colleges-with-on-campus-housing/697/

NOTE: This letter could apply to any Black/African women who are bashed by Black/African men.

Dear Black Men Who Bash Black Women:

As a 47-year old married woman of five, who grew up in a Southern Baptist church, my first forays into interracial dating waters weren't all peaches and cream. This was the deep South, mind you, the Mississippi Delta. There were mixed reactions, some approving, some concerned and some downright scary. My parents and siblings were naturally a bit concerned, as they should be, but didn't discourage me, because they had taught all of us not to discriminate against anyone because of race, gender, creed or religion. All were God's children.

I dated White, Black, Mexican, Native American and even a cute Vietnamese student whose parents ran a little restaurant in downtown Sparta, Mississippi. Nothing serious. Just good clean, fun. Those dates gave me valuable insight into other cultures. Now I would be lying if I said that all my dates' families were cool with their sons dating a White girl, because they weren't. But most would rather die than be labeled outright racists. It was just not a proper thing to be, during those days, at least not openly. So they grudgingly approved, even though I knew which way the wind blew.

By the time I entered college, I continued to date interracially. And it was there I lost my virginity to a Black basketball player. We dated for about 7 months, before he transferred to another college which offered a better chance of him being picked up by a pro team. In my sophomore year, I began to pick up a disturbing trend from some of the Black men I dated and the ones who wanted to date me. They spent a lot of time bashing Black women. This was a regular topic of conversation between me and my circle of White female friends who also dated interracially, mostly Black men and, they had experienced this trend too. Of course we had heard White men call White women all kinds of names, but the way some of these Black men talked about Black women, in general, was absolutely VICIOUS, DEMEANING and OUTRIGHT DISGRACEFUL! It's like they hated the very ground Black women walked on. It made all of us very uncomfortable.

Finally, my friends and I decided that we wouldn't date ANY Black men, on campus or off campus that bashed any Black woman in our presence or within our hearing. And we didn't. It didn't take long before some of these Black men started bashing US, when we started to reject their offers of dinner, movies and whatnot. Now we were considered po' White trash, trailer trash, redneck hillbillies, nasty White wh-re bit-hes and the like. But we didn't care. We stuck to our guns.

Some of the Black women caught wind of what we were doing and actually befriended us. This was a surprising turn of events because at first, most of them were a bit standoffish and a few were clearly jealous of us dating "their men". With the others though, we eventually started our own charitable campus sorority which focused on needy single mothers and have remained good friends to this day. But I digress.

What my friends and I never understood was 'Why?

Why do some Black men feel bashing Black women is okay, especially in public? Come to think of it, White wo/men who bash each other are out of their league, when it comes to Black men wo/men bashing each other. They can't compete. And remember, I'm a White woman who grew up around White wo/men so I know what I'm talking about. I understand that ALL women aren't saints and deserve to be called some colorful names but this was different. This was sick, twisted and hateful. Some of these Black men were bashing millions upon millions of Black women, 99.9 percent of whom they didn't even know, if that. The idea that a White woman or any other race of woman has something better to offer over a Black woman just didn't sit too well with White women like me and my friends at all.

Some Black men think ALL the White women they date or plan to date or even marry are cool with hearing Black women being bashed left and right but, they're are sadly mistaken. We're not. It's highly disrespectful and a BIG TURNOFF to those of us who were raised right. Some white women will tell Black men outright what they think of hearing them bash Black women. Others won't. They'll just find a way out of the relationship, by saying things like "This is not working out" or start a fight and use it as a convenient excuse to break up. The most cowardly of us will just stop answering phone calls, change the phone number, avoid you altogether or even move, if need be.

Some Black men seem not realize that when they bash Black women en masse they are bashing their own female folk, by default. If Black men want to date White women then date them. Why do they feel they have to use "Black women are this" or "Black women are that" excuses, so they can date interracially? What does that say about them as men, Black men who may or may not be husbands or fathers?

If you are with a white woman and have a daughter or daughters with a Black woman, do you voice your disgust about Black women within their hearing? I hope not! How do you think they would feel surfing TV channels or browsing the internet and coming across nasty topics directed at Black women like:

"Black Men Who Refuse To Date Black Women"
"Why Don't Successful Black Men Date Black Women?"
"Young Black Men Don't Want Black Women"
"Why I Don't Date Black Women"
"Why Black Men Date White Women"
"Why Black Men Are Dating Other Races"
Why 99% of Black Men And Black Athletes Date White Women"
"Why Black Guys Like White Girls"
"10 Reasons Black Guys Prefer White Girls"
"Why I Don't Date Black Girls"

No matter how strong Black women are perceived to be, such degradation, disdain and disgust coming from your own Black men in open forums has to sting a little bit, even if Black women don't admit it. Could this be why some Black women resort to doing things to their bodies and hair that make them appear White or close to it? Only a psychologist could tell you for sure. And I'm not one.

There are some things that Black women bashing Black men should know when they're in their "Black women are this" or "Black women are that" state of mind:

All white women aren't attracted to you and don't desire to be with you, openly or secretly. Most of us prefer to date and marry our own, just like other races.

All White women aren't blue-eyed, blond-haired angels; they can be she-devils, worse than any Black woman ever thought to be and can get you killed, especially down here in the South.

Back in my day, one of the biggest reasons some Black men dated White girls was because they were considered easy; they would drop their drawers quicker than Black girls. Some Black men still date White women for that very reason. When I was in college, it was the White girls NOT the Black girls who were the biggest s-uts on campus.

One of most laughable mistakes some Black men make is thinking that the possession of a big penis is their key to a White woman's vjay and her mind. As a White woman who dated Black men before I married and had a circle of female friends who did too, Honey, I can tell you that a big penis is not enough to sustain a relationship. Plus, not all Black men are well endowed, and of those who are so endowed, some do not know how to use those big joysticks either. And another thing, not all White men are lacking in that department either. So scratch that myth. Bottom line, as a man, you have to bring more to the table than a big penis.

Another mistake some Black men make about White women is the notion that they are docile, weak minded and easy to control. As some Black men who survived the fire of a scorned, done wrong White woman will tell you, how wrong they were! Some White women will appear to be docile, weak minded and easy to control but cross them and the she-devil in them will come out, depending on what you did to them. And if it's serious enough, they will drag your behind to court and get their satisfaction in dollars and cents.

Do some of you Black men ever ask yourself why some of you don't have a problem dating or marrying White women who are more successful than you, make more money than you, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses than you BUT consider it a BIG PROBLEM when the same can be said of a Black woman? And to top it all off, some misinformed Black men actually think they're going to control a successful White woman or walk all over her! Think again! Money talks! BS walks! And that means YOU, right out of her life, if you try that "I'm the man. Do as I say" stuff with her and that goes for some of her Black sisters too.

As far as that "Nobody Wants Black Women" train of thought, open your eyes. There are scores of White men and other races of men, the rich and not so rich that openly or secretly desire and will marry Black women and father children with them. What you degrade, they upgrade.

And why is it some Black men claim that Black women are too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage yet many times end up White women with the same characteristics? Women are women. They come in all sizes, shapes, temperaments and levels of emotional health.

And for those White women who think they are some type of goddesses to Black men, bash White men, and consider Black men better than White men, Honey, think again. I'm a White woman and I know your kind better than a Black man or a Black woman ever will. You're no better than a Black woman bashing Black man. You deserve each other. Don't kid yourselves. Something is off in your heads. You need therapy.

At the end of day, no one should judge anyone based on stereotypes or past experiences. Everyone is different, be it Black, White Red or Yellow. Everyone is beautiful in their own way and should be treated that way.

Sincerely yours,

Mrs. Lucretia Branch-Davidson

P.S. "Same goes for Black Women who bash Black Men!" - From Her Husband, Mr. Davidson

Source: topix.com / Response to the topic: "Why Black Men Don't Date Or Marry Black Women"

Nigerians Complain Of Discrimination In Mumbai, India

Africans staying in and around India's commercial capital, Mumbai (Bombay), complain of indiscriminate racism and constant police harassment, reports the BBC's Zubair Ahmed.

Nigerian Sambo Davis is married to an Indian woman and lives in Mumbai. All his documents are valid, but he was arrested by the police recently on suspicion of being a drug dealer.

He and 30 other black Africans were detained for hours before they were let off with an apology.

But the following day, Mr. Davis said that he was shocked to read in local newspapers that they were "arrested for drug peddling".

"The police treat us Africans like dogs," he says. Mr. Davis claims he often faces discrimination when he goes to restaurants or when he tries to rent an apartment in gated middle-class communities.

But he is nevertheless one of the lucky ones. He found a decent flat to rent, thanks to his Indian wife. But his fellow countrymen, he says, still face discrimination: "When they go to rent flats in a normal building they are told - 'you are a black man, you are Nigerian, and you are not wanted'. This is racism."

'Hide and seek'

There is no official data on how many Africans live in Mumbai, but since India's economic progress gathered momentum in recent years, many have come to work in and around the city. Unofficial estimates put their numbers at more than 5,000.


Most of them are engaged in exporting garments to Nigeria and other African countries.

Many others are students, enrolled in the region's prestigious educational institutions.

But there are also hundreds of Africans, mostly Nigerians, who live as illegal immigrants in India. They have either "lost" their passports or their visas have "expired".

Every day, these people play hide-and-seek with the police - if they are caught, they are sent to jail.

Ikeorah Junior from Lagos runs a cafe for Africans in a crowded market on Mumbai's Mohammed Ali Road.

"I don't understand why they [police] have to go from house to house to arrest the people who don't have their papers. If they don't have papers, then deport them, don't put them in jail," he says.

Ahmed Javed, who is in charge of maintaining law and order in the state of Maharashtra, says it is not that simple: "In most cases they have no passports. So, unless their nationalities are determined, they cannot be deported."

Dozens of Africans have taken up residence on Mira Road, a dusty, nondescript town just outside Mumbai.

One "illegal immigrant" there asked me for money, claiming he had not eaten for two days.

He looked worried and told me that he had been approached by drug dealers to work for them.

"I have been here for three years - my visa expired a long time ago. I want to go back home. Please help me, brother," he tells me.

In this neighbourhood, Negro or kaalia (black in Hindi) are the two words indiscriminately used to describe all black people.

"We call them Negro because they are black. They look frightening," says one woman.

"They don't find homes to rent in Mumbai, they only stay in Mira Road. Why? Because of the way they behave. They sell drugs and indulge in other illegal activities. They cannot be trusted," a local man commented, seemingly unaware of the offensive nature of his words.

'Embarrassed and ashamed' Against such a backdrop of pronounced prejudice, Sheeba Rani married Sambo Davis four years ago and the couple have two children.

Mrs. Davis says her parents are enlightened Christians and they blessed them because they thought the marriage was God's wish. But, she says, she has been ostracised by many friends, relatives and society since her marriage.

Mrs. Davis is "embarrassed and ashamed" by the behaviour of the Indian people towards black Africans.

"When I used to go to a mall or if I walked with him, I always wanted him to hold my hand. But when people saw me with him, they thought I was from a bad family or even a prostitute."

Earlier, she did not understand why black people were being looked down upon, but now she says she does.

"Because our society is obsessed with white skin. If I had married a white man, I would have gained more friends and society's approval too."

Mr. Davis believes that the discrimination is solely "because I am a black man".

"It's because I am from Africa, I am a Nigerian. I think Indians see us as inferior."

Yet despite the discrimination they face, nearly all Africans the BBC interviewed said they had a soft spot for their adopted country. They say the relations between India and Africa are "rock solid". Many argued that Indians and Africans are brothers.

"We look after Indians in our countries. They have become rich there. All we want here is for Indians to understand we are not drug dealers. We are not violent. We are just like them."

Source: BBC

In your opinion...

What are things every man or woman should know or have by the time they're 30?

Only those not familiar with the true effects of verbal abuse consider it harmless or think there is a double standard, favoring women over men.

"Emotional Abuse of Men: Men Victims of Emotional Abuse Too"
Written by Natasha Tracy

"...emotional abuse of men is every bit as unacceptable as emotional abuse of women. Emotional abuse of men is more common than once thought although the exact numbers on its occurrence aren't known due to lack of study. In domestic abuse, about 40% of cases involve violence of women against men. Emotional abuse of men is the same as emotional abuse of women: it is acts, including verbal assault, that make a person feel less self-worth or dignity. Emotional abuse of men makes them feel like less of a person."

Read more at: http://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/emotional-psychological-abuse/emotional-abuse-of-men-men-victims-of-emotional-abuse-too/

Over here, most pastors are very conscious of any criticism directed at them, particularly, if it involves tithes and other monetary donations. The last thing they want is for any member/s to question their use of those tithes and monetary donations. They fear legal investigations like the plague and know their gooses will be cooked, if the investigations reveal any wrongdoing and the press gets wind of it. The most arrogant of these pastors seem to fall the hardest, when their names are dragged through the muck of indignant public opinion. They are the ones you see on TV boo-hooing and begging for mercy and forgiveness. Some even resign. How the mighty fall!

Anyways, most pastors of these mega churches in Nigeria may have copied the 'flash' of the greedy, self-serving American pastors over here but not the talent of doing those things that keep their critics at bay. Their arrogance knows no bounds.

First, before ANY pastor starts a church, they should know the Bible front to back. The last thing ANY pastor needs is someone who DOES know the Bible, front to back, challenging him or her in church, in the media or on the internet, regarding unscriptural teachings, especially from atheists. Unlike some pastors, most atheists DO know the Bible, like the back of their hand and will call them out on unscriptural teachings or point out scriptures they're deliberately twisting. Lord help any shifty pastor who dares to challenge an atheist who was once a Christian, particularly a Christian pastor. These ones will hand these pastors their heads on a silver platter. The 'touch not my anointed' threat doesn't work on atheists or those already critical of Nigerian pastors living lavish lifestyles and guilty of twisting scripture to suit their selfish need to control and milk money from gullible church members.

Second, Nigerian pastors of these mega churches should pay close attention to what some of their wiser American counterparts are doing for the needy - things that keep criticism or suspicion at a minimum and away from their ministry.

So...what are some of these things Nigerian pastors of these mega churches could be doing for needy Nigerians, with all the millions of dollars they rake in?

With those millions of dollars, they could...

...offer job training and job placement assistance

...set up food and clothing pantries and emergency aid programs

...establish daycare centers for parents who need them

...offer free adult literacy classes for those who need them

...organize street ministries that feed and clothe the homeless

...use church land or buy land with acreage enough to build tuition-free Christian schools for needy Nigerian children from ages 4 and up, offering optional boarding choices

Example:

Free Private Schools

http://privateschool.about.com/od/usschoolsonline/tp/freeschools.htm

...establish tuition-free higher learning Christian institutions for needy Nigerian students, offering optional boarding choices

Example:

20 Of The Best Colleges Providing Free Tuition

http://www.thebestschools.org/blog/2012/12/10/20-colleges-providing-free-tuition/

...build libraries and recreation centers

...build health clinics and/or hospitals that offer free medical treatment and preventive health care

...establish working farms with vegetable gardens, livestock and poultry to be used to feed students and needy Nigerians

...establish 'seed money' loan programs to assist needy Nigerians in establishing small business ventures

...establish specialized programs for the elderly and infirm

...set up orphanages and/or programs for Nigeria's street kids

All churches aren't financially capable of doing many of these things but mega churches are more than capable of implementing many of them.

So why aren't more of them doing more for needy Nigerians?

What does this say about the Pastors?

Better yet, what does it say about members who'd rather jump to the defense of those who dare criticize their darling Pastors, rather than look with discerning eyes at their lavish lifestyles and ask themselves "What would Jesus say?"

It does take discipline to be monogamous.

But alas...some people are easily tempted, especially if they feel something is missing in their relationship.

"Monogamy means one SPOUSE, it does not mean fidelity. Fidelity is a choice that many people make, but some do not. Most of us are built for monogamy and certainly it is natural, but occasional infidelity seems to be natural, too, in the animal world– including us humans. Monogamy brings safety and predictability. That’s why we have to work to put a little sizzle into our long-term relationships, to prevent too much predictability, and boredom." Helen Fisher, PhD Biological Anthropologist @ yourtango.com

"Christianity and its practitioners are sometimes the epitome of double standards. Yet, they mount the higher ground to preach superior moral values. The advent of monogamy has led to prostitution. It has led to matrimonial infidelity. It has led to late marriages or the non-existence of it. It has led to serial divorce and has broken more homes than when the fine ideal of polygamy ruled the world. Those who preach monogamy are thoroughbred hypocrites. They preach one thing and practice the other. You find most of them in Western civilization. Unfortunately for us in Africa, we tend to ape Western Christian culture (marriage-wise) without a thorough scrutiny. We ape Western civilization in all its ramifications, without question. Is monogamy really in tune with our traditional values? Is it in tune with our culture?" Godson Offoaro, excerpted from the article "Polygamy and Monogamy: An African’s Perspective" @ patriarchsjournal.

"As far as monogamy is concerned, I honestly believe that human beings are not monogamous biologically; they were not created that way. However, it is certainly helpful in society and social structure, because of the family structure. You're going to see families. You're going to see children. ... So in the interest of family structure, we've evolved biologically to the point where we are social creatures." Deepak Chopra, Director, The Chopra Center For Well Being

What do YOU think?

IS monogamy natural for humans?

Here is a brief account of a close friend's most memorable experience, once he landed in New York, as a new immigrant, fresh from Nigeria.

After a long flight from Nigeria, he landed at JFK Airport in New York and was picked up by his cousin who lived in Brooklyn. A welcoming party was waiting for him. After a round of eating and drinking and socializing, my friend noticed a cat that was the pet of his cousin's wife. Now my friend loved cats. So he tried to tempt the cat over to him, using a piece of fish as bait and some sweet talk.

He went: "Here, puzzy, puzzy! Come puzzy, puzzy! I have some very sweet fish for you! Ehn! You are such a beautiful puzzy! Come! Come!"

Well, he said the entire room went deadly quiet. You could hear a rat pizz on cotton. Everyone was looking at him very strangely.

Finally, my friend's cousin spoke up.

He said: "My brother. Cats aren't called "puzzies" over here. That's street slang for a woman's vjay! We say cat or kitty."

lol

My friend said he was so mortified, he couldn't enjoy the rest of his welcoming party. But he never made that mistake again.
______________

What's your most memorable experience, as a new immigrant?

CAMNEWTON4PRES:
So what's the point of your thread? Some m'en also speak about violence against women . As for the slogans they only paint as confused minds.
No confusion just pointing the fact that women seem unable to walk the talk

First, there is no confusion among women who can take care of themselves without depending on a man's money. But there is confusion among women who claim to be independent but still look for a man to give them money. And I could say that some men seem unable to "walk the talk" too...but I won't.

Second,

The point of the thread is that MORE men need to speak out against violence against women. It's when men put their weight behind this issue, make laws with teeth in them and/or enforce existing laws that attitudes toward abused women, in fact, women in general, will change for the better, so will attitudes toward abused men.

Men's attitudes toward women are fairly easy to recognize. Listen to the words some men use to describe women. In societies where men are in power, words are often used to put women down, where calling a girl or woman a “b-tch,” “freak,” “wh-re,” “c-nt,” or “s-ut” is common. Such language sends a message that females are less than fully human. When men see women as inferior, it becomes easier to treat them with less respect, disregard their rights, and ignore their well-being.

When you hear women on NL speak of abused women seeking help, what have they said, in so many different ways?

If she runs to the police, she's told: "This is a family matter. Go home and be a good wife!"

If she runs to her pastor, she's told: "Just be more submissive and prayerful, because God hates divorce!"

If she runs to her parents, she's told: "Go face your husband. Ask him what you did to offend him. Ask him for forgiveness. Remember: God hates divorce!"

If the busybody biddies get wind of it, she's asked: "What did you do?!"

So where does she turn? Where does she go? Will her next landing place be the grave - leaving her children motherless?

Even though the following articles mainly focus on Nigeria, violence against women is a global problem.

"Domestic Violence: The Problem Pervading Nigeria"
http://thinkafricapress.com/nigeria/domestic-violence-problem-pervading

"Violence against Women in Nigeria…. Myth or Fact?"
http://www.nigeriansinamerica.com/articles/5996/1/Violence-against-Women-in-Nigeria-Myth-or-Fact/Page1.html

MALAWI, AFRICA: More men jump on the band-wagon to stop violence against women
http://womennewsnetwork.net/2013/06/16/malawi-men-stop-violence-women/

Involve men to check violence against women
http://www.modernghana.com/news/274481/84/involve-men-to-check-violence-against-women.html

How Men In South Africa Are Trying To Stop Violence Against Women
http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2012/12/how-men-in-south-africa-are-trying-to-stop-violence-against-women/266689/

Partnering with Men to Stop Violence Against Women
http://www.peacexpeace.org/2011/10/partnering-with-men-to-stop-violence-against-women/

Violence Against Women Is a Men’s Issue
http://goodmenproject.com/gender-sexuality/violence-against-women-is-a-mens-issue/
______________________________________________________________________
Remember this thread?

"When Your Wife Pushes You Too Far, A Slap Or 2 Could Be Justified"

https://www.nairaland.com/887033/when-wife-pushes-too-fara

bukatyne:
If a man verbally abuses a woman, is she allowed to hit the man

Another good question!

Following the logic of some men, women can provoke men to hit them because of their sharp tongues.

Does it also follow that men can also provoke women to hit THEM because of THEIR sharp tongues?

Mind you now, some men have a mouth on them too.

No matter who's running their mouth, married folks shouldn't be yapping at each other like chihuahuas.

That's not very adult of them.

Why do some people feel the need to share every intimate detail of their lives online?

Why do some people care so much about what other's think of them while online?

CAMNEWTON4PRES:
Do women speak up about violence against men?

So we should now fight your fights? What happened to the I'm a strong woman and I don't need no man slogans?

Women, Confused minds as usual

Yes, some women DO speak up about violence against men.

Here's one...

"Domestic Violence Against Men"
by emievil

Read more at: http://hubpages.com/hub/Domestic-ViolenceAgainst-Men

As for the slogans...what these women are really saying is they can take care of themselves financially, rather than depend on a man's finances to take of them. Unfortunately, some women don't have that option and some wicked men exploit that. You should understand that by now, in this global age.

So where's the confusion?

KAYD007:
@ the OP.

It is said that one who wears the shoe knows where and how it pinches...

You don't take your VEEJAY to the gynecologist and expect your male neighbour to explain to the gyne how "the thing is doing you tininitanana, na him get to.to?

Shoes that are too large are apt to trip you up, and when they're too small, they will pinch your feet.
So it is with those whose marriages do not suit them.

5minsmadness:
And why is it nonsense?
As long as you keep ignoring the reason for the abuse no matter how 'nonsensical' it is, it will definitely continue.

Just like a man will only do what a woman allows him to do - so will a woman only do what a man allows her to do.

FYI...most women secretly detest men who they can walk all over - they consider them weak and passive - they respect strong, assertive men.

If a woman can turn her back on an unhappy marriage where she is disrespected and/or subjected to verbal and physical abuse and take her kids and raise them by herself...so can a man...no matter the investment. I've seen women walk away from cushy lifestyles because of some messed-up in the head men, vowing never to return and they don't return. As for the kids...some pray for their warring parents to separate and/or divorce. It becomes too much for them. It messes with their heads.

And I don't know the kind of men you know, but the ones I know don't take nonsense from women. You will not disrespect them or talk to them crazy because they will check you, without laying one finger on you or calling you any nasty names. They don't wait for any BS from any woman to become a habit, if they know, without a doubt in their minds that they have been good husbands and fathers. They will walk. For them, peace of mind is far more valuable than any material things. Some even take their kids with them or share joint custody.

To be more specific, I know of several Naija men over here who have done that very thing. One has five kids he's raising, with the help of his parents who live here now. As for his ex-wife, she's in the banking field, makes good money and has to pay him child support and the kids hate her, for the way she talked to and treated their father. She's one nasty piece of work! As for him and the kids, they are so much happier. And the ex-wife? Word on the street is that she swears he'll come crawling back to her one day. Yeah...when pigs fly.

Life is too short to be miserably married.

So...why stay in an unhappy marriage?

Here are 10 reasons some people do...http://anamikas.hubpages.com/hub/Divorse-unhappy-Marriage-reasons

Princecalm:
What do you do when your Dad or Mum detest of the one you love so dearly?.Will you just ignore and go on with the wedding.

I've faced this before!

His family detests me because I'm not Nigerian.

Remember the wedding pictures posted of a Naija woman marrying an AA man? Remember the look on the parents' faces, especially the mother, during and after the wedding? Almost same look, when I first met his parents, other siblings and assorted relatives...and it was downhill all the way from that. If looks could, I would be a dead sister. And all that hisssssssssssin' and rolling of the eyes from the women! lol I can laugh about it now but back then it wasn't even funny. I was so put off that there were a couple of times that I actually suggested to him that we break up. Thank goodness we hung in there.

Anyways...we just went on with the wedding. No one from his side of the family showed up except for his baby sister, her three kids and her husband who live here. They were the only ones sitting on his family's side of the church. His parents, other siblings and some other family members have even turned a bit on his baby sister, because she dares associate with us. That's the reason he never bothered building back home and that's the reason we've only visited twice. His family was a bit hostile and so unwelcoming, he was like "Hell no!" to any more visits. We had to stay with one of his friends, both times. His parents and people don't even acknowledge our marriage or our kids, after two decades. Nasty group of people. My people love him to death though.

Oh well, such is life!

BananaBender:
And how do men provoke domestic violence?

Good question!

Btw...this is one of the most common excuses (and their variations) abusive men give when they abuse women.

"She provoked me!"

"She made me do it!"

"She pushed me into it!"

Nonsense!

FGM - A Ritual Of Agony - English

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=U7p0tXIcIzM

FGM - A Ritual Of Agony - English

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=U7p0tXIcIzM

We all have expectations of our partners. When these expectations are not met, we can feel used, unappreciated, neglected and cheated.

Feeling unappreciated and undervalued causes us to feel resentful toward our partners and can seriously undermine our relationships or marriages. People have an inner sense of what is fair and when we start feeling things are unfair, immediate action (communication) must be taken, before things gets worse. Resentment, or that sense of unfairness, creates emotional distance and emotional distance can kill relationships and marriages.

For Men...

In what ways do you feel unappreciated by your GF/Wife in your relationship or marriage?

If you've told her how you feel, did she change her attitude toward you or not?


For Women...

In what ways do you feel unappreciated by your BF/Husband in your relationship or marriage?

If you've told him how you feel, did he change his attitude toward you or not?

"September 11th, 2001 was a day of great tragedy for everyone in this country, regardless of skin color, nationality, or religious beliefs. Unfortunately, a select few felt that retaliating against innocent people would, in some way, provide them with the satisfaction of revenge for the tragic events that had occurred. The victims shared in the national grief, outrage and horror, but, because of their appearance, they also became targets of violence. Right after the events of September 11th, Arab Americans, Muslims Americans, Sikh Americans, and Asian-Pacific Americans, all became targets of backlash violence."

Read more at: http://gbgm-umc.org/umw/legislative/hatecrimes.html
_______________________________________________________________________

Ebola Outbreak in West Africa: The Political Dimensions

African immigrants who live in the Dallas area told Reuters news agency that they are experiencing fewer handshakes and more suspicious stares. One resident said that someone told him to go into quarantine. Even those Africans who came to the U.S. from regions far away from the epicenter of the EVD outbreak in Sierra Leone, Liberia and Guinea are facing paranoia and fear. “Some immigrants from Somalia wearing traditional clothing that includes headscarves for women, say they have seen fingers pointed their way on the neighborhood streets,” reported Reuters. “People are looking at us in a bad way. We didn’t have anything to do with this. Somalia does not have Ebola. It is on the other side of Africa,” said Shadiya Abdi, 27, an immigrant from Somalia.

Read more at: http://www.globalresearch.ca/ebola-outbreak-in-west-africa-the-political-dimensions/5406732 ________________________________________________________________________
Ebola Fears Increase Pressure To Restrict Flights From Africa

The first case of Ebola diagnosed within the U.S. is prompting calls for heavy travel restrictions between the U.S. and those West African countries hardest hit by the outbreak–and one advocate is even warning against the possibility of “Ebola tourism” by patients seeking better care here.

Read more at: http://www.amren.com/news/2014/10/ebola-fears-increase-pressure-to-restrict-flights-from-africa/ ________________________________________________________________________
Louisiana governor wants all travel banned between US and Ebola-stricken countries but CDC chief says it's unnecessary

Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal said Friday that the Obama administration should immediately turn away incoming air traffic from countries hit by the Ebola virus epidemic. 'We should stop accepting flights from countries that are Ebola stricken,' the Republican said in a statement. 'Even countries in Africa have cut back on or stopped accepting flights from countries with Ebola outbreaks.'

Read more at: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2780013/Louisiana-s-Bobby-Jindal-wants-travel-US-Ebola-stricken-countries-banned.html
________________________________________________________________________
Rick Perry: No Ebola flight bans

Texas Gov. Rick Perry (R-Texas) is pushing back against fellow Republicans who want the federal government to ban travel from countries affected by Ebola. While he called for additional screenings for the virus at points of entry, Perry said Tuesday that stopping flights from West Africa would go too far. "I think it makes better sense for us to have a screening process in place," he said at a news conference at Galveston National Laboratory.

Read more at: http://thehill.com/policy/healthcare/220012-rick-perry-no-ebola-flight-bans ________________________________________________________________________
Airline Cabin Cleaners Strike Over Ebola Exposure Fears

Nearly 200 airline cabin cleaners walked off the job at a New York City airport overnight, striking over health and safety issues that include fears over possible exposure to Ebola. The protest involves Air Serv cabin cleaners in Terminal D at New York’s LaGuardia airport, a contractor that serves Delta, as well as supporting workers from LaGuardia and JFK International airports. Protesting workers carried signs and chanted during today’s rally, protesting against against conditions that they say often find them encountering hypodermic needles, vomit and blood.

Read more at: http://abcnews.go.com/Health/airline-cabin-cleaners-strike-ebola-exposure-fears/story?id=26066160