afam4eva:
You're right. But you need to see the way some spouse will run for their phone the moment they see that their spouse is about checking something on it.

So you will clump all spouses the same because of one spouse running for his or her phone

Seriously

When my phone rings....if I am not near my phone....my husband answer the phone and bring me my phone. We do not have any reasons to snoop in each other's phones because we do not have ANYTHING TO HIDE. My phone is always unlocked, in open spaces, and usually by him. The same for his and I do not look through his phone unless he ask me to. Sometimes he would say such and such sent a text asking about you....read what she or he said....then i would look. I would do the same for him.....

Trust is not for everyone I see.

Very disrespectfull, i cant do it to her, so i deserve some personal respect

Kobojunkie:

Long before cell phones and passworded gadgets came into the picture, did people [size=13pt]HIDE [/size]things from each other? If you are hiding something from the one you have chosen to spend your life with and 'bare your soul to', what is the meaning of the union again?

there was nothing to hide then - most information were verbal then or in written mode which one can easily shred after reading. these days, the info comes electronically which one can often forget to dispose or in a mode where the info can easily be seen by somebody other than the intended recipient! times are different now - phones must be passworded!

Ujujoan:

What has that even got to do with trust

I pick up any phone and automatically go through it without thinking, yes even the SMSs.

I read my mum's, sister's. friend's SMS and I doubt that makes me insecure!

If there's any text message I dont want people to see, I delete from my phone. I dont care if people go through my inbox, not at all!

Why are you going through ANYONE'S phones that has nothing to do with you The question is about spouses...not relatives.

I guess stealing is encouraged in some parts....

At BF/GF level,it might not be too ok,but at fiance/fiancee or husband/wife level,there's nothing absolutely wrong about that. Once both of you have decided to refer to yourselves as better halves,there should be nothing like secret between the two of you

If you have no skeleton in your closets,there should be no cause for alarm!

Mrs..Chima:


Insecure people are inquisitive as well. If you trust your partner..why are you reading her texts? If she have her phone laying around...how is she hiding

If the phone is unlock and all you have to do is touch the screen...how is she hiding If she is sitting next to you having a conversation whether it is by text or voice...how is she hiding

Keep justifying insecurity....it won't go away.

Insecure people are inquisitive but not all inquisitive people are insecure. As I explained, it is possible to want to read up on what is going on with your spouse, at least so you KNOW some of what is happening in your spouses life . .

If the phone is sitting unlocked next to you, and you do not feel to update yourself on what is going on with one of the partners in your marriage, that is all you.

I just wonder how many are comfortable with the police or FBI knowing so much more about their spouses than they do. This is someone you swore your life to and promised to bare your soul to. But you do not want to make sure to update yourself on what is going on in their life on a regular basis . . would rather wait for that person to come tell you what happpened every 24 hours . . . if that works for you . . OK.

By the way, I hate the picture of women/men who have absolutely no clue what is going on in the lives of those they share their lives with. I think it is bubble-brained. and discouraging. These phones/laptops are just like paper tools that you write on. If you cannot take the time to learn what is going on in your spouses personal life(which you are supposed to be on top of), I wonder if you even care as much as you claim.

I don't think IT IS because it won't change the Price of Kpomo..

Miss_Ife: I wouldn't like him to read my sms before me, though I don't really mind if he goes through my phone from time to time. What bothers me is more the lack of trust/controlling behavior that goes with this kind of things. I need my husband to trust me, if there is anything worrying him, he should talk to me instead of monitoring my phone/email/timetable...

Anyway, I don't have to worry much, we usually don't use each others phone without asking first.

I think i like ur view

dridowu: Very disrespectfull, i cant do it to her, so i deserve some personal respect

You know they will flog you right?

There are issues that a man can personally handle without involving his wife, even though it will by no way hurt her. Its one man one phone.

why are people hypocrites? what's the difference between telling your wife to excuse you and your mother for a private discussion AND hiding a text sent by your mother from your wife? the aim of both actions is you don't want her to know what's being said!!!!

@Post

I don't think it's disrespectful but I think during courtship these things ought to be ironed out. You should ask your potential spouse if it is okay to check their text messages and what not. The phone I currently have is a funny one. Once a text message has been read, the message automatically leaves the phone's front screen and you will not be notified again that you have a new text message. So, if someone other than myself reads my text and forgets to pass on the message of the text to me, then I won't know I even had an incoming text message to begin with. I just think that whatever works for the couple is fine.

He knows better than to do so, i wouldn't do that either.

Mrs..Chima:


Why are you going through ANYONE'S phones that has nothing to do with you The question is about spouses...not relatives.

I guess stealing is encouraged in some parts....

How's going thru someone's phone connected to stealing

Seriously, people need to get lives outside their phones. It's just a device for pete's sakes!

coogar:

what has nudity gotta do with the topic of discussion? why are people hypocrites? what's the difference between telling your wife to excuse you and your mother for a private discussion AND hiding a text sent by your mother from your wife? the aim of both actions is you don't want her to know what's being said!!!!

I think my post is kinda similar to the topic of discussion so i thought i should post it.

afam4eva:
I think my post is kinda similar to the topic of discussion so i thought i should post it.

ROTFLMAO!

My wife does it, luckily for me i have a black BB where all the scandalous stuff goes to

Super1759: are you for real. What's the secrecy for? Someone uve sworn to be of one flesh with. It means ur not sincere then.
As for me its not wrong. She can read anything.cos we trust each other, mutual things

yes,i am for real.
It is called my phone for a reason not 'our' phone.
.
I can do snooping only if i have reasons to suspect my partner..and i'll interprete my partner snooping through my phone as lack of trust for me.

Miss_Ife: I wouldn't like him to read my sms before me, though I don't really mind if he goes through my phone from time to time. What bothers me is more the lack of trust/controlling behavior that goes with this kind of things. I need my husband to trust me, if there is anything worrying him, he should talk to me instead of monitoring my phone/email/timetable...

Anyway, I don't have to worry much, we usually don't use each others phone without asking first.

I see no problem with that. Snooping through phones is a sign of distrust and uncertainty. I am willing to bet many of these snoopers are doing it behind their partner's back not directly in their faces.

I think it is a courtesy to ask if it is okay that you can go through the phone for WHATEVER REASON is unknown to me....but if they are sharing a phone then it is understandable.

Sometimes....your friends may be going through a rough time and sent texts asking for advices about personal things....that why it is not always good to read other's people texts because of that. If a person gets a text and soon as they hear ding and the snooper running to see what is being said is odd in my book. If that doesn't sound like someone with trust issues...then I am Jesus Christ!

afam4eva: [size=14pt]Is it Disrespectful for your spouse to barge in when you're stark N*aked?[/size]

I wonder too.

slimyem: yes,i am for real.
It is called my phone for a reason not 'our' phone.
.
I can do snooping only if i have reasons to suspect my partner..and i'll interprete my partner snooping through my phone as lack of trust for me.

so you dont share anything that belongs to your spouse

You don't tounch h/her properties cos it's not yours

I guess I'm yuet to understand the big deal about phones . . . except of course someone has something to hide!

lagerwhenindoubt: My wife does it, luckily for me i have a black BB where all the scandalous stuff goes to

can you imagine!!!
Hian!

In my own opinion,there is nothing bad abt it

Mrs..Chima:


I see no problem with that. Snooping through phones is a sign of distrust and uncertainty. I am willing to bet many of these snoopers are doing it behind their partner's back not directly in their faces.

Why is opening your spouses phone, to read, SNOOPING? Why do you feel you are STEALING when you do that? I don't get that at all. That phone is supposed to be yours as your spouse is your property and all that belongs to him, belongs to you. So why do you think you are SNOOPING when you open what belongs to you?

slimyem: yes,i am for real.
It is called my phone for a reason not 'our' phone.
.
I can do snooping only if i have reasons to suspect my partner..and i'll interprete my partner snooping through my phone as lack of trust for me.

Exactly!!! If I am snooping through my husband's phone...I am checking for some shit. Not because I absentmindedly checking his phone like someone on this thread used as an excuse.

if I snoop through his phone...I am seeing if he is chatting with other chicks or what is he plotting.....I don't expect some chatters to be honest and realistic.

There's nothing wrong if she wants T☺ read my sms but it might save her a whole lot of trouble иot to bother herself too much with it as long as she trusts me like i trust her.

Anybody can send any type of sms if they want to, just Щhat if someone is playin mischeif with me and sends a 'i love u or i miss u so much' kind of sms, does that mean i have something with them!

So to save her the whole "wahala" its better if she keeps off. Anyway if the above scenario were to play out we will talk about it so no issue.

Kobojunkie:

Why is opening your spouses phone, to read, SNOOPING? Why do you feel you are STEALING when you do that? I don't get that at all. That phone is supposed to be yours as your spouse is your property and all that belongs to him, belongs to you. So why do you think you are SNOOPING when you open what belongs to you?

Then it is not your PARTNER'S PHONE....simply as that.

Next question.

Mrs..Chima:


Exactly!!! If I am snooping through my husband's phone...I am checking for some shit. Not because I absentmindedly checking his phone like someone on this thread used as an excuse.

if I snoop through his phone...I am seeing if he is chatting with other chicks or what is he plotting.....I don't expect some chatters to be honest and realistic.

If you are married and you still have what is YOURS and what is OURS separate . . . isn't that a problem . . I mean the STATE considers you two ONE . .. God considers you ONE . . . Why do you still considers yourself as INDIVIDUALS.

Mrs..Chima:


Then it is not your PARTNER'S PHONE....simply as that.

Next question.

OK . . .That he uses the phone does not make it his property. In the event that it is found by the cops, it will be returned to YOU since you are supposed to be ONE with your partner. so why are you INSECURE about picking it up to read . . If you believe that?

Flexskillz: There's nothing wrong if she wants T☺ read my sms but it might save her a whole lot of trouble иot to bother herself too much with it as long as she trusts me like i trust her.

[size=33pt]Anybody can send any type of sms if they want to, just Щhat if someone is playin mischeif with me and sends a 'i love u or i miss u so much' kind of sms, does that mean i have something with them! [/size]

So to save her the whole "wahala" its better if she keeps off. Anyway if the above scenario were to play out we will talk about it so no issue.

That's true and that have happened to many couples as well.

I think it's imperative that people learn the 1diocyncrasies of marriage before deciding whether to go into it or not.

Do you think it's a joke when they see, you're and your partner have become one in Marriage? What is means is that there'll be no more "My phone" or "My prick", rather it should be "Our phone" and "Our prick". If you can't come to accept the fact that you'll have to share everything with your spouse then marriage is not for you.