..

My advice, don't marry this woman. You don't love her. From the look of things, looks like shes the one doing all the asking.

Well advicing her is not enough. Why don't you help her start up the biz since it's going to be rewarding for you too? I mean working-together-and-building-up-financially, has never made more sense to me.

Rocktation: Well advicing her is not enough. Why don't you help her start up the biz since it's going to be rewarding for you too? I mean working-together-and-building-up-financially, has never made more sense to me.

It takes more than love for marriage to happen. Wedding is paid for with money not love, rent is paid for with money not love, kids are also taken care of with money. So the man is not asking for too much. Dump her if she doesn't want to do anything to contribute.

Rocktation: Well advicing her is not enough. Why don't you help her start up the biz since it's going to be rewarding for you too? I mean working-together-and-building-up-financially, has never made more sense to me.

investing financially in someone that you are NOT married to (or that you do not picture yourself marrying "yet" is not a wise move. the guy is already helping her by giving her the proper direction in where she should focus, instead of marriage. he should now sit back and study her......as he wrote, nobody wants to settle for a liability.

@OP
continue doing what you believe is right, dont be forced or blackmailed into doing something that you know is wrong. btw, how did she react when you told her to go get some income?

ur right to hesitate to marry a woman without a job. Stick to your guns

Rocktation: Well advicing her is not enough. Why don't you help her start up the biz since it's going to be rewarding for you too? I mean working-together-and-building-up-financially, has never made more sense to me.

why should he help her get a direction in life? i mean for God sake she is 29 as the poster said. if she doesn't know that these days you need to get up and do something then she will have problems down the line because beauty fades

poster you did nothing wrong you have only dated for 5 months and i bet in those five months she has asked for more than she has worked for. Abeg dont go down the road of marrying a liability

^^well for one, getting a direction in life will make her his wife, from everything he's said up there. I mean, he's done all the picturing that needs to be done already. He doesn't care if he's dated her for just two hours or one week. Neither did he lay any other complaint on why he cannot get married to her.
The only bad thing stopping this union, is her jobless state. Fortunately, he believes in working together and building up financially, and doesn't care how miserly the pay she brings in, will be. So sure, he can set up something petty for "them". Or how detrimental can petty be to his comfortable financial life?

Oh don't we just miss those times when society's expectations from both genders were clear-cut and men were ever willing to claim ownership of every breath we drew? Now, i just don't know why women may not be expected to share the trousers in relationships, even though the same society is fast making it compulsory that they share in men's responsiblities, from time immemorial. Imagine men relaying tragic tales of wedding bills and rent now. Sad.

Rocktation: ^^well for one, getting a direction in life will make her his wife, from everything he's said up there. I mean, he's done all the picturing that needs to be done already. He doesn't care if he's dated her for just two hours or one week. Neither did he lay any other complaint on why he cannot get married to her.
The only bad thing stopping this union, is her jobless state. Fortunately, he believes in working together and building up financially, and doesn't care how miserly the pay she brings in, will be. So sure, he can set up something petty for "them". Or how detrimental can petty be to his comfortable financial life?

Oh don't we just miss those times when society's expectations from both genders were clear-cut and men were ever willing to claim ownership of every breath we drew? Now, i just don't why women may not be expected to share the trousers in relationships, even though the same society is fast making it compulsory that they share in men's responsiblities, from time immemorial. Imagine men relaying tragic tales of wedding bills and rent now. Sad.

Time for a reality check! Marriage is a costly venture that must be funded and paid for in order for love to flourish.

@ op, from the tone in your post, its evident you don't even like her.
If you did, you won't come here asking for advice, you would already know what to do.

At times I wonder when the female folks are just too quick to defend theirs without thinking through.. They are always playing the victim.. Unnecessary solidarity! .. She shld go and get a job and prevent being a future liability... Ladies, show some pride, bring little stuffs with you wen packing to ur husband's house after marriage, don't show up with an empty nylon bag!

AmBeautiful: @ op, from the tone in your post, its evident you don't even like her.
If you did, you won't come here asking for advice, you would already know what to do.

Likeness doesn't pay the bill... Get it in ur head!

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Likeness doesn't pay the bill... Get it in ur head!

But it sure does make life easier and working for money without love is worst than love with no money.

From your post, it seems she really doesn't want to do anything or do any work. Some Nigerian ladies are like that. They have been trained to believe that all they need to do in Life is give birth and do house chores. No real vision dream or ambition. Their biggest dream is to marry a hardworking man like u. I wouldn't want to get myself involved in that. Op, run. In this age considering the state of the Nigerian economy, the woman also must work and bring something in. She apparently isn't willing to do that. She just wants to get married to you so she can become full time housewife and baby making machine. Is that what u want? If yes, go for it. If No, you know what to do.