I just finished my SSCE, and I was going out with someone else before i met this guy, it was just that day and he travelled to the U.K, a little later i broke up with my then boyfriend and it was just a casual thing with me and this other guy, we would chat and that would be it. After sometime, things changed he developed feelings and he had to travel back to Nigeria and since we were in different cities we did not meet till i had to leave for the U.K, i'm here now we call each other, we chat regularly and it has been a love affair since then. it's 4 real, i mean we share everything together and things are working, we're like a normal couple except for the distance.
He's asked me to marry him like 3 times and he keeps talking of our future together, i play along though i'm scared, it's just too crazy, we have baby names picked out and everything.
i just want to know what you all think.

If u have negative comments just don't make it hurt much. Please.
thanx.

Permit me to ask a few questions, however impertinent they may seem.

Have you met in the UK?

You make it sound like all you do is call each other and chat. How many times has he taken you out? Is he proud enough of you to introduce you to his friends? Are you prepared to live together in sickess and in health, etc etc?

These are some questions you should ask yourself. Lastly, you'll need to analyze your intentions -- what exactly strikes or struck you about him?

I dont want to hurt you feelings so Im just going to keep it as WHOA, you all have a long distance relationship, anybody can be somebody over the phone, homeboy is talking about marriage yet you live far away from him, to me, long distance relationships DONT last.

Just like Diva said, you don't really know him do you? I mean like character wise and so on. May be you guys should plan to meet face to face, spend some time together and find out if you can live with each other before you talk about marriage, hmn?

marry him if u love him

First of all if ya'll are going to get married will ya'll have a long distance marraige?

no, his plans are to come here and he is working on it, he's got his visa and everything, he just has to fix some things.

again, i know him like inside out, we understand each other so much and tell everything, we share problems and stuff like that, it's like a real r/ship except for the distance

Then I think you should go for it if you really LOVE him but if you dont dont try it.
And you have to make sure ready to settle down.
Follow your heart girl, . . .and no you're not crazy

thnx a lot, 4 dat sade, it means a lot to me

No problem

@gem87
ONE

He's asked me to marry him like 3 times and he keeps talking of our future together, i play along though i'm scared, it's just too crazy, we have baby names picked out and everything.
i just want to know what you all think.

When guys begin to talk of "future", they are serious.

TWO
On a more serious note: I think @Zach has a point:
You might want to press the breaks a lil bit at least to make sure he is:

Is he proud enough of you to introduce you to his friends?

Proud of you, since you said you just met once, at least till he arrives the U.K and you go out etc,

THREE
You just finished SSCE, right.
How about college? Are you prepared physically, mentally, financially etc, to combine marriage with "future", 3-4yrs college/Univ life? thats if the marriage hes talking about would be like "any time soon"?

If you answer Yes, to my 2, and 3
Go for it.

wow thnx a lot 4 dat
i said i just finished my ssce wen we met and dat ws 3 yrs ago,
i'm goin 2 uni dis sept. and i'm sure he's more dan proud of me
the future is well taken care of too

gem87:

I just finished my SSCE, and I was going out with someone else before i met this guy, it was just that day and he travelled to the U.K, a little later i broke up with my then boyfriend and it was just a casual thing with me and this other guy, we would chat and that would be it. After sometime, things changed he developed feelings and he had to travel back to Nigeria and since we were in different cities we did not meet till i had to leave for the U.K, i'm here now we call each other, we chat regularly and it has been a love affair since then. it's 4 real, i mean we share everything together and things are working, we're like a normal couple except for the distance.
He's asked me to marry him like 3 times and he keeps talking of our future together, i play along though i'm scared, it's just too crazy, we have baby names picked out and everything.
i just want to know what you all think.

If u have negative comments just don't make it hurt much. Please.
thanx.

me too only i dont play along, i mean every word i say to him we've got baby names picked out too marry him if thats what feels right to U

@gem87

wow thnx a lot 4 that
i said i just finished my ssce when we met and that ws 3 years ago,
i'm goin 2 uni this sept. and i'm sure he's more dan proud of me
the future is well taken care of too

Well, girl, what are you waiting for,, its all good, shoot,
dont 4get my Invi,

of course,lol.

Not crazy if wat u feel is love.

You may want to wait a little while until he's here and you both meet face-to-face, after 6 months to 1yr and u still have the same feelings, i'd say to marry him! you guys sound so good together, picking out baby names right now is not equal to we will get married! but sounds like he truly loves you, the sky is not ur limit girl!

I think you should atleast "date" for awhile like some months or years even and make sure u finish your college and university before u get married!!

has he finished his university/ does he have a job yet?

it's not like we're gettin married immediately, it's more like he wnts 2 mk sure he marks his territory, u know, his education is down and he's got a job.
things r settled just i'm not ready yet, it's more like he's waiting 4 me.

and u've only met once?

He's waiting for you to come back to nigeria or he's coming to the U.K ?

just tell him you still there and not to rush you the best he can do is wait for u to finish ur education i dont know why nigerian girls like old people anyway

he's finished his education and got a job, you are still in school/college

he's not old! he's just 3 yrs older, dat's not too old is it?

and he's cumin 2 d U.K

_{when he come to the U.K he has to find a job and trust me when he start looking for a job u better hide  (it aint easy) and make sure u never run out of int call cards 'cos he has to call his wifey(s) back home almost every 30mins}
I better shut up! goodluck though   
just be careful

@Gem87
Girl u are crazy.I didn't read ur post fully but i gather u are crazy.That dude is going to use as a foootmark and dump u like bad news

yeah, thnx a lot u guys.

Don't mind them gem87,

i guess you are intelligent enough to know what you are doing. not every guy is out there to use and dump a lady, do not let unecessary suspicion spoil what might turn out to be a great future. Be wise and know when to withdraw if need be, let the guy come to the UK, give him a chance!

He might just turn out to be what you were looking for!

wow, dat makes a lot of sense thnx a lot,
i mean i can totally relate.

I have come across more than 2 or 3 guys from nigeria who have never been outside naija before who married american girls who had never been to nigeria before. i know one particular girl who met her husband on a two week visit to nigeria, the guy had never been to the US until they got married. all the communication was via phone, email and letters. the parents did all the necessary running around and today both are in the US and living happily! NOT every guy interested in a girl in the UK is looking for a stepping stone to run away from nigeria.
You can find true love anywhere on earth and u don't necessarily have to see them to love them.

If you truly love this guy, give him a chance and get to know him better. when he comes, study him VERY WELL before you make any form of commitment and best let either a sister or close friend be in the know so they can advice you better!

Not every black person is African and not every Arab person is a muslim,But most are,not every Nigerian wants to use a Londoner as a a stepping stone but most do.U should be as scepitical as a woman who has dated Bill Clinton.

Gem87, I don't get this. In your first post, you said he travelled to UK. Then later you said he's coming to UK. Was that a typo or something?

he came and left cuz stuff came up back home which is still keeping him

so he's cumin bck, do u understand now?

The hot soup is better enjoyed when eaten slowly, u sound just like how many of ur age have sounded. I'd say keep the fire burning but dont over kindle it, allow it burn slowly, Our elders say 'It is usually the hottest love that has the Coldest end', Spend quality time with him, study him cos M stands for both Men and Mysterious

Love can make us all act and feel great, but the same love can cause some to commit suicide, it is the strongest single word that existed in all time. So, my sister, I will pray for u tonite and hope it ends exactly as u would want it, but i'll ask u to apply caution in the mean time