ivyspicy: But seriously dear am sure u saw the signs during courtship but perhaps u loved him too much and hoped that he would change.In my own opinion i wud advice u to reconcile with him and take him to see a matured pastor for conselling and prayers and also a psycharist before it goes out of hand.Gud luck

Guyman02:
Please can you summarise the most important tips and suggestions (contributions from Nlers you like most) so that others can learn from them. Dont just walk away like that after Nlers have spent their time on your issue. Thanks as you do so.

Guyman02:

Thank you for this beautiful analysis. This woman surely has a killer tongue even from her brief write up and seems to suffer from excessive uncontrollable anger. The husband is a matured man who walks away from his pregnant wife who may be a violent type, instead of staying behind and allowing himself to snap and the next thing will be inflicting injury on his wife or even death and the first question asked whenever we hear such news is why didnt you just leave the house for her.
Madam I will advise you examine yourself by keeping your tongue in check, respect, respect and respect your husband. Allow him to be the man of the house. Like my mum will do to dad whenever she asks him for money for our school fees, feeding or for anything, he will vibrate and shout and ask her what she did with the last money he gave her the other day, she keeps quiet and allows him to express himself as the man, at the end before he leaves the house in the morning, the money will be lying on the table for her to pick. But some other women will start exchanging words and talk back at their husband and give him and make him dread coming back home.
Your husband from your explanation seems to be a real gentleman, who would rather walk away than inflict harm on you or get his BP rising.
You are the problem here am sorry from your explanations.
Pray for God to help you overcome the spirit of not being in control of your emotions and temper which leads to constant arguments and quarrels before he falls into the hands of another accommodating woman. Dont leave him because you will be carrying this same problem to another man if you think you can remarry as you are.

Guyman02: I can observe that you are a very proud woman, claiming all the good part without giving any credit to your husband. Woman! reduce your pride and try another system by being really submissive, talk to him gently even when there is an argument. Try not to order him around and call him names because he refused to do a particular chore. Try to always put him in a good mood and with time he will surely change.
- Do you declare your income to him or you hide it from him.

- Have you ever asked him if he will need your assistance in anyway to help him start saving and cutting costs since you said he spends money lavishly and has no savings. (perhaps your own or his lifestyles might be contributing to that)

- Do you commend him as a wonderful husband and father in front of his and your own family?

- Do you jointly plan your income for the good of the family or you play the wise one who can handle it better i.e go out there and buy whatever you need without his consent.

- What kind of abuses do you rain on him?

- Are you the violent type and sometimes think of slapping him across the face but restrain yourself?

- Do you think by yourself that you have a deadly tongue or people have told you that?

- Do you call him when he is not at home and tell him how much you love him and that you just prepared his favourite dish and that after eating he must reward you with good lovemaking for the night?

- Do you pray together? if yes, are you among the women who would say 'I come against any woman that is after or interested in my husband and wait for the man to say Amen!.

- Do you tell others how irresponsible you think your husband is?

- Do you tell him that you think you can do without him afterall you have a profession and a job?

- Do you bring your profession to the home and doesnt know where to draw the line e.g are you are a lawyer who sees everything in the home from a legal perspective or an accountant who thinks everything should be numerically correct or a medical personnel who thinks that the man is sick in the head?

Please answer the questions which you have consistently dodged in this thread. But most of all, if you start showing him respect and love and treating him as the head of the home and avoiding telling him things and words that you will not use or utter to your boss or employer he will never be tempted to leave home again.

DailyNews: My brother, dating is never a guarantee that a couple won't quarrel when they finally marry. Most people hide their true person during nowadays dating when virtually all tactics for deceiving people and making them love u and feel u are the mr. or miss right have been exposed on every internet website.

Dating is way different from marriage. In fact, if I am to decide for all humans, I would cancel dating entirely. People should never taste, or test, they should taste, test and learn in marriage.

Dating isn't an internship...human behaviours can change at any moment in life based on condition, environment and situation.

The guy's attitude of running away after a mild argument with his wife isn't nice. Though the woman in question may have issues, but first, the guy' s attitude isn't nice. The mother of his baby Oh come on guys...if he can't respect any other person, what about the lovely, innocent baby, huh

Any man that has the heart to abandon his child should be shot!!! Babies are the best creatures on earth, so innocent and lovely

And I wonder why women cherish sharing their marital issues online...na wa o...today women and this their internet craze eh...may God save una o....

If at all the threadstarter has made up her mind to quit the marriage, and is using indirect way to seek for a replacement hubby on nairaland...then she shud enrol for miss nairaland soon or upload her pics for nairaland guys to check her out, maybe the solution lies there

DailyNews and troublemaking eh

2legit2qwt: I still can't believe some people actually have reasons to back a runaway husband

Even if we are to assume the scenario that the woman is the cause of the problem, a man running away from his home for weeks or months will not fix the issues in his relationship.

Efemena_xy:

Stories like these make the MrBrownJays and their attitudes to pregnant women look acceptable.

@OP, why should you be having mild to heavy arguments with your spouse frequently? Sounds like you instigate them. Please explain 'heavy arguments'. Do you get violent? Throw things around? Do you have a sharp, caustic tongue that's quick to insult the hell out of the man??

You're pregnant. The least you can do is respect yourself and keep your mouth shut. Why must you have an argument with your husband? Pls don't give the excuse of being hormonal this and hormonal that! Aren't you aware of the complications that can arise from having a high bp, which can be induced from unnecessary arguments?

I'm sorry to say this, but your husband sounds like the more mature one here. Rather than entangle himself with a battle of words, he chooses to walk out of the situation till things cool down. Or what do you expect him to do? Sit down quietly while you heap insult upon insult upon his head? Do you even know what might happen if he snaps?

Or maybe, you really are one of those who has a fetish for violence and only feel loved if your husband plummets the living daylights out of you.

Sorry, but from what you've posted, I support your husband 100%. You on the other hand haven't learnt your lesson. If sitting down to discuss amicably, and keeping your mouth shut while he airs his grievances is too much for you to bear, then don't blame him the day he walks out on you for good... straight into the arms of a more accommodating missus.

Oh, and I need to ask this of you: Didn't you guys date at all before getting hitched? Didn't you study the man before tying the knot and saying "I do"?

totalbaby: You are one of the most disgusting animals i have ever come across in my whole life and to think that you are a "woman" is really unbelievable. You are such a disgrace to womanhood. Please jump back on your broom and fly away. I wish that you suffer the same fate(runaway husband) so you will remember the ish that you said when someone was in pain. Anuofia

baby_123:

What have you gained by insulting her for her point of view when you have none?

totalbaby: You can fly with her on her broom too. That is if you are not an alternate account. She deserves the insult. I do not insult ppl here but this lady went on another level.

baby_123:

You have no opinion or advice only insults. Did she insult you? What did she say to deserve your insults. Are you not an animal? You dont have the ability to reason or think. Talkless know how to talk or advise OP. But you can open your dirty, stinking juvenile mouth to insult someone else. Me? An alternate account? Abi you are talking about yourself. Creating 20 accounts to insult Efe. Psychopath.

totalbaby: Get a life. My comment was for Efe, if you dnt like it go and hug a transformer. Unless you are Efe. Mind your damn business and leave me alone.

baby_123:

Grow up kid. Never come out of the jungle to insult your betters again. Make sure you have an opinion that is worth reading. if you dont, shut the F up. Reta*rded child. You see people insulting, you join the fray. What are you looking for? Likes? How many of your other names have insulted Efe on this thread. Better get mental help.

Sexily Endowed: The same person accusing her of insults is the same one insulting her. Think you are rather the kid, esp when the comment was not about you.

baby_123:

Grow up kid. Never come out of the jungle to insult your betters again. Make sure you have an opinion that is worth reading. if you dont, shut the F up. Reta*rded child. You see people insulting, you join the fray. What are you looking for? Likes? How many of your other names have insulted Efe on this thread. Better get mental help.

totalbaby: LWKMD. Ms Efe why don't you log on your real account instead of hiding behind this moniker. Smdh. I see i got on your nerves. I love it when a btch starts to get all frustrated and aggro over ish. Carry on. *Grabs some popcorn*

baby_123:

Come out with your real name and stop creating different names to insult her. You have an e-multiple personality disorder. You should really be laughing at yourself.

totalbaby: Lol i have insulted her already with my moniker, unlike you, i dnt hind behind monikers to get my point accross. You are still an animal and it's about time you jump on your broom and fly away. P.S take a chill pill before you get high blood pressure.How come you are taking panadol for someone elses headache? Lol this just further proves that you are Efe. Coward

baby_123:

Look, total baby or whatever you call yourself. You jumped out with the multiple moniker accusation because you are guilty of such. I dont have a mental problem. You do. That is why you sit on NL all day like a tape recorder with different usernames saying the same thing. Get mental help, lecherous pig. This is my last comment to you. Glad you learnt some new words today. And in future, be less of an animal. If you have a comment, state it. Ciao!

totalbaby: I sit on Nl all day yet you have commented on every single page of this thread. Wonders shall never end.I don’t know what makes you so st..upid, but it really works!1 I'm done with you. There is no cure for stupidity and i am not going to stoop to your low level.

Miss_3v3: *Dies* Am stealing this

baby_123:

This poly monikering rat is crazier than i thought. I commented on every page on this thread. Really

rapmike:
both of u ladies should behave maturely. ur insulting each oda does not make the other perfect, does it?
and at totalbaby, i understand that from a woman's point of view, that the comment that started this insults can be offending, but she probably says the truth.as some men are monsters, some women are too.
Am not saying that the Woman in question is a monster(gush...i dont even know her), but she should check herself b4 facing the guy and she should pray abt it. i still hold blame for both parties. i mean running from a woman for weeks because of an argument does not worth it, but i dont know how the woman and the man in question handles arguments and differences. so that is my stay

troy20: u two just played out d problem between d op n d husband.trying 2 get at each oda's personality.looking 4 weak points to land major blows.totalbaby u just turned out Efe's example

rapmike:
both of u ladies should behave maturely. ur insulting each oda does not make the other perfect, does it?
and at totalbaby, i understand that from a woman's point of view, that the comment that started this insults can be offending, but she probably says the truth.as some men are monsters, some women are too.
Am not saying that the Woman in question is a monster(gush...i dont even know her), but she should check herself b4 facing the guy and she should pray abt it. i still hold blame for both parties. i mean running from a woman for weeks because of an argument does not worth it, but i dont know how the woman and the man in question handles arguments and differences. so that is my stay

debosky: What kind of yeye argument makes a man stay away for months? Is that not madness? .

What exactly do you mean by 'mild to heavy argument'? Did it get physical or were threats made?

The guy either has another wife/family elsewhere or is suffering from serious mental issues. Normal people don't run away from their own homes for extended periods of time.

baby_123: Mad woman wey don enter market is worried about PMS. Lol.