Here is the story.

I went to a party with my boyfriend. At the party I met an African American woman (like myself). I was happy to be able to connect with someone because the Nigerian ladies would not give me the time of day (so I stopped trying).

The woman I talked to told me how she has been with her Nigerian man for 2 years, and every time she comes to the parties her boyfriend's friends try and slip her their numbers and such.

The thing is that some of the men she pointed out are friends of my boyfriend, and I know them very well. They always let me know how happy they are that my boyfriend has found such a woman and that they never would have expected him to fall in love with an AA.

I told her she should let her man know what's going on, but she refuses to do so. What kills me is that some of these very same men have a very low opinion of African American women, so why on earth are they toasting her? and where is the loyalty amongst them?

The reason sista that they do it is because they have very low opinion of us. That is not all of them but so many of them are like that, that I almost dismissed my hubby because I thought he was like all the rest.

I also had a similar experience that the Nigerian women dissed me at the party my sweetie too me to on Friday. So I understand the feeling but besides that none of the men tried to slip me their numbers and maybe it is because we were at a couples event and only couples there or maybe because we get married in 4 days but anyway they did not try that with me. I would have told him and given him then numbers for him to deal with. I know he is a jealous lover and would not allow any of his friends to do that.

@topic, It's funny you use the term "toasting" to mean they were trying to get at you. I don't know any American who uses that term. Don't get me wrong, I'm not calling you out and what not, I am just wondering if you are who you say you are, that is, African American.

Den she's intrested in her boyfriends friends, for her not to let her boyfriend know, as for me all girls are disame,

@sistawoman

Congrat's to you!!

StephenP:

@topic, It's funny you use the term "toasting" to mean they were trying to get at you. I don't know any American who uses that term. Don't get me wrong, I'm not calling you out and what not, I am just wondering if you are who you say you are, that is, African American.

She has been dating her bf for 2 years I would think by now that she has picked up some of the terms/expressions and what not of the person she loves.

sistawoman:

She has been dating her boyfriend for 2 years I would think by now that she has picked up some of the terms/expressions and what not of the person she loves.

No she hasn't.

@StephenP

I've been with my boyfriend for a while, so i've picked up some of the terminology. i wanted to utilize some of my skills  

, also working very hard at learning the language,

nalijah07:

, also working very hard at learning the language,

Me too girl, trying to learn the language and how to cook the food.

StephenP:

No she hasn't.

omg - Why are you so suspicious

nalijah07:

@StephenP

I've been with my boyfriend for a while, so i've picked up some of the terminology. i wanted to utilize some of my skills 

, also working very hard at learning the language,

sistawoman:

Me too girl, trying to learn the language and how to cook the food.

There are hella languages and different types of food in Nigeria so which one(s) are you trying to learn?

nalijah07:



omg - Why are you so suspicious

Am I?

Yes, very suspicious.

StephenP:

There are hella languages and different types of food in Nigeria so which one(s) are you trying to learn?

Yoruba the native tounge that my hubby -----in 72 hours 20 mins---speaks and eats.

I agree with sistawoman; I think the guys were passing out their numbers because they have a low opinion of some AA women.

Many of the men are possibly under the impression that Nalijah is just having fun with the Nigerian dude; it's just a fling, not
a long term relationship that could lead to marriage.

But what the guys did is not necessarily unique to Nigerian men; "toasting" another man's woman is practiced the
world over (just to keep things in perspective)

hmmm,

@ Tonin,

They were actually passing out the numbers to my friend, not me.

But if they were passing out the numbers, and if given the opportunity to date her, what would that say about themselves - The should then have a low opion of themselves.

Also, do you suggest I tell my boyfriend what happened?

nalijah07:

@ Tonin,

They were actually passing out the numbers to my friend, not me.

But if they were passing out the numbers, and if given the opportunity to date her, what would that say about themselves - The should then have a low opion of themselves.

Also, do you suggest I tell my boyfriend what happened?

If they did not pass any numbers to you then there is nothing for you to tell. That would be your gf choice to tell her man. They find nothing wrong with getting thier d,ck wet in another womans pu,,y. They feel it is thier god given right to f,ck as much as possible. Please dont take this as a blanket statement I dont beleive all men are like this just alot of them. And this is not just Nigeran men it is MEN period.