Guyz I think I now understand while the almighty Samson felt weak in the hands of Delaila.

With all my doggedness and astute posture, with this mindset that no girl can mess my brain up in the name of love. I have fallen flat and need some help.

I was introduced to this girl by her cousin who is a friend of mine. The cousin is a very good girl just that she is not my type of person - short. I prefer a girl my height or a bit taller. So she told me I am a very good person and would like to introduce me to her cousin which eventually stays in their house. She attested to d fact that her cousin is a very special person to her with sterling character . And as such wudnt want a bad person to date her. Mind u d said girl is even older than my friend - soo is not as if the girl cant make her decisions.

The crux is this: ever since me and the chik got talking both phone, wasap, fb, it has been magical. Gud command of English, calm calculated and very smart. I was keeping my card in my chest pending wen I see this babe. My work doesn't really give me time but somehow I managed to go see her . I set my eyes on this babe and went ' bonker'. She is more than what my friend described in all spheres.

Now I hv fallen head over heels with this babe. She told me about her ex and how the brake-up disorganized her. She said she wouldn't want to enter into relationship 4 now till she is done with skul. She will finish next year. She is all I want in a wife which av craved 4 a long time.

She said I shud wait for her to finish b4 she dates me.
My fear is this: even though she doesn't demand for money, though she tells me some of her financial challenges, I always feel compelled to assist as a working guy.

1) Wudnt dat be mugu-ish spending on somebody am not yet into relationship with bcuz as it stands now she just wants to be just friends.
2) We are not in the same state.

Please guyz help me. I dont want to loose this girl . The same time I wouldn't want t be spending on her with hope dat whenever she is ready she will date me. What do u guyz think bcuz am confused here. What is the best approach here.

it depends on u. if u want to be lonely till she is done, den wait for her. And who says u can assume the position of her father by paying her bills? assist only when u are led,as you can do for any other person and never start what u cnt finish. goodluck

kinnad: it depends on u. if u want to be lonely till she is done, den wait for her. And who says u can assume the position of her father by paying her bills? assist only when u are led,as you can do for any other person and never start what u cnt finish. goodluck

Thanks alot Kinnad. I actually told her i hate being put on a friend zone. My kind of person is iether you are in or out. But I see myself going against this my principle.

Just don't be on her neck all the time, give her time to love you and she will be the one to complain why you don't have much time for and by then you will know she is getting ready to be committed.
Don't spend for her on the platform of getting relationship as a return, assist when you have the power to do as a true friend and in time she will decide to be with you, most time it takes time for ladies to fall in love but men fall in love easily mostly when the looks and the shape of the girl is killing

wazobia_for_u: Just don't be on her neck all the time, give her time to love you and she will be the one to complain why you don't have much time for and by then you will know she is getting ready to be committed.
Don't spend for her on the platform of getting relationship as a return, assist when you have the power to do as a true friend and in time she will decide to be with you, most time it takes time for ladies to fall in love but men fall in love easily mostly when the looks and the shape of the girl is killing

on point...you have said it all.

wazobia_for_u: Just don't be on her neck all the time, give her time to love you and she will be the one to complain why you don't have much time for and by then you will know she is getting ready to be committed.
Don't spend for her on the platform of getting relationship as a return, assist when you have the power to do as a true friend and in time she will decide to be with you, most time it takes time for ladies to fall in love but men fall in love easily mostly when the looks and the shape of the girl is killing

@Wazobia. Giving her space u mean is it by not calling her or wat. I actually told her yesterday that I may not be calling her d way I used to. She said she wants to always be hearing my voice . Me on the other hand calls her like fire. I really want to get my sane mind back . I told mysef I will have to get another girl to fill d emptiness but the thought alone is killing.

Confussion2:

@Wazobia. Giving her space u mean is it by not calling her or wat. I actually told her yesterday that I may not be calling her d way I used to. She said she wants to always be hearing my voice . Me on the other hand calls her like fire. I really want to get my sane mind back . I told mysef I will have to get another girl to feel d emptiness but the thought alone is killing.

Now there are two issues to be treated ,
1 • you love her but she want you to wait
2 • how to tackle loneliness

If you really love her and she is the best for your future partner, then you can wait for her to know what she really wanted also, when you both finally agree to be together it will be like you are just a newborn and the long waiting days will be like flash to you.

Next time, you don't tell a lady your next line of actions, allow her to notice it herself, you shouldn't have told her you want to reduce the way you use to call her , just get yourself busy and call her maybe morning and night, don't talk about relationship, that alone will make her miss you because that is what she is expecting you to say like before.

*** women are like shadow, you follow them they run away from you, you get back from them they follow you ***

Confussion2:


Gud command of English, calm calculated and very smart. I was keeping my card IN my chest pending.... She told me about her ex and how the BRAKE-UP disorganized her.

Hmm! What can I say, the writers ^^^above have said it all, you need not spend for her like a girlfriend (and that does not mean you should spend on a girlfriend as if she were a liability). Give to her like you would any other friend.
Secondly, you need to ask yourself the question, can you wait for her till after her graduation? You don't need a thread on nairaland to answer that question my brother. All the best sha!

Yes its muguish spending. Dont give a girl something with hope of getting something in return. Give a girl what you can give to ur fellow guy until she becomes your gf/wife.

Thanks guyz. I just needed a place to vent these feelings. My fear has been someone comming around to sweep her off her feet while am waiting somewhere. Women brain sometimes are too fickle.

Confussion2:
Guyz I think I now understand while the almighty Samson felt weak in the hands of Delaila.

With all my doggedness and astute posture, with this mindset that no girl can mess my brain up in the name of love. I have fallen flat and need some help.

I was introduced to this girl by her cousin who is a friend of mine. The cousin is a very good girl just that she is not my type of person - short. I prefer a girl my height or a bit taller. So she told me I am a very good person and would like to introduce me to her cousin which eventually stays in their house. She attested to d fact that her cousin is a very special person to her with sterling character . And as such wudnt want a bad person to date her. Mind u d said girl is even older than my friend - soo is not as if the girl cant make her decisions.

The crux is this: ever since me and the chik got talking both phone, wasap, fb, it has been magical. Gud command of English, calm calculated and very smart. I was keeping my card in my chest pending wen I see this babe. My work doesn't really give me time but somehow I managed to go see her . I set my eyes on this babe and went ' bonker'. She is more than what my friend described in all spheres.

Now I hv fallen head over heels with this babe. She told me about her ex and how the brake-up disorganized her. She said she wouldn't want to enter into relationship 4 now till she is done with skul. She will finish next year. She is all I want in a wife which av craved 4 a long time.

She said I shud wait for her to finish b4 she dates me.
My fear is this: even though she doesn't demand for money, though she tells me some of her financial challenges, I always feel compelled to assist as a working guy.

1) Wudnt dat be mugu-ish spending on somebody am not yet into relationship with bcuz as it stands now she just wants to be just friends.
2) We are not in the same state.

Please guyz help me. I dont want to loose this girl . The same time I wouldn't want t be spending on her with hope dat whenever she is ready she will date me. What do u guyz think bcuz am confused here. What is the best approach here.

My brother, d only advice i will give to you is to follow your heart. If you know d sacrifice worth it why not make it. I want you to understand that friendship, relationship and even marriage should not be for you and you alone, it shouldn't be what you stand to gain. It all about what you give to it and what others gain 4rm you in it. If you know you are in a positon to help why not help? Not becus she could date you in return, becus if you help becus of that motive and she end up not dating you, you do be dissapointed. Help becus you desire it and as if you will gain nothing from it.

Confussion2:
Guyz I think I now understand while the almighty Samson felt weak in the hands of Delaila.

With all my doggedness and astute posture, with this mindset that no girl can mess my brain up in the name of love. I have fallen flat and need some help.

I was introduced to this girl by her cousin who is a friend of mine. The cousin is a very good girl just that she is not my type of person - short. I prefer a girl my height or a bit taller. So she told me I am a very good person and would like to introduce me to her cousin which eventually stays in their house. She attested to d fact that her cousin is a very special person to her with sterling character . And as such wudnt want a bad person to date her. Mind u d said girl is even older than my friend - soo is not as if the girl cant make her decisions.

The crux is this: ever since me and the chik got talking both phone, wasap, fb, it has been magical. Gud command of English, calm calculated and very smart. I was keeping my card in my chest pending wen I see this babe. My work doesn't really give me time but somehow I managed to go see her . I set my eyes on this babe and went ' bonker'. She is more than what my friend described in all spheres.

Now I hv fallen head over heels with this babe. She told me about her ex and how the brake-up disorganized her. She said she wouldn't want to enter into relationship 4 now till she is done with skul. She will finish next year. She is all I want in a wife which av craved 4 a long time.

She said I shud wait for her to finish b4 she dates me.
My fear is this: even though she doesn't demand for money, though she tells me some of her financial challenges, I always feel compelled to assist as a working guy.

1) Wudnt dat be mugu-ish spending on somebody am not yet into relationship with bcuz as it stands now she just wants to be just friends.
2) We are not in the same state.

Please guyz help me. I dont want to loose this girl . The same time I wouldn't want t be spending on her with hope dat whenever she is ready she will date me. What do u guyz think bcuz am confused here. What is the best approach here.

When she talks of her financial challenges if you feel like giving,you give if you don't feel like then don't. Besides you are a man wooing a woman, you do what you have to do. Don't play too safe and don't be silly.

Confussion2: Thanks guyz. I just needed a place to vent these feelings. My fear has been someone comming around to sweep her off her feet while am waiting somewhere. Women brain sometimes are too fickle.

I don't mean any disrespect but it looks like you are the one with a fickle brain here.

A girl who placed you on a waiting list, sentenced you to the jail of freind-zone and opened office on your head is fickle minded?

Bro, she might be into you, she might actually want you to wait for her, and of course...I have no doubt that she's a good erson. But I could bet that she's not yet into you...and may never be into you.

And even if she's into you, she will lose interest quickly as girls find men who are so into them boring. Such attitude pisses them off bro....except they are about clocking 30.

Best approach is to try to forget about her, get other things to occupy your mind. Stop callimg her. If possible delete anything that has to do with her and be hopeful and prayerful that the girl very special girl God has marked for you is on her way to meet and appreciate you. It might even be HER!

But until them, stop looking for who's not looking for you. Its physically, emotionally and financially draining.

Nuzo':


I don't mean any disrespect but it looks like you are the one with a fickle brain here.

A girl who placed you on a waiting list, sentenced you to the jail of freind-zone and opened office on your head is fickle minded?

Bro, she might be into you, she might actually want you to wait for her, and of course...I have no doubt that she's a good erson. But I could bet that she's not yet into you...and may never be into you.

And even if she's into you, she will lose interest quickly as girls find men who are so into them boring. Such attitude pisses them off bro....except they are about clocking 30.

Best approach is to try to forget about her, get other things to occupy your mind. Stop callimg her. If possible delete anything that has to do with her and be hopeful and prayerful that the girl very special girl God has marked for you is on her way to meet and appreciate you. It might even be HER!

But until them, stop looking for who's not looking for you. Its physically, emotionally and financially draining.

I like straight up guyz. Taking the bullseye kind of advice. No insult taken. Thanks buddy

brother pls find another girl that will kill that loniless u gat inside plssssssss.that girl in question seriously dont like or maybe not yet,she has other toasters which she trying to figure out who is the best but from the look of tins it seems u down the pecking order.in terms of her finacial problem,gv wen it comes from ur mind givers dey say never lack but if u thinking may be she will accept uu after spending hell my bro u are on a long tin(mugu24).the secrete is dat girls hate wen a boy is falling head over heels for then ,form for her tell her she aint beautiful de way u thought,flirt with other girls on phone wen u are with her trust me u go tire of her.my last warning never u be on the watin list(u wan do kidney transplant?) or the zone i hate most in my life 'friend zone'