tonychristopher:
I will marry and I have dated many ...most of them are matured but apart from that she must have only a kid . I won't take children

The kid won't stay with us the first few years of marriage but then I will love the kids as mine

Its no big deal

Better to marry a baby mama that will give me peace or single presumed virgin and give me hell

You need your head examined.

If you resist the examination, then you need to be restrained and have your head smashed with multiple blows from a very good hammer.

carefreewannabe:


Children are not a burden.

Unless they are your biological or you work for the UN/ world vision of course they are.

khiaa:









What's with all this disrepect towards single moms. Do your baby mama know this is how you feel about her? You are hating on women who are in the same situation as your woman. I wonder do other people see her the way you see other baby mamas, and why haven't you married her since you are doing so well?

I have married her. Unlike some she refused to carry my child unless I put a ring on it. She actually has morals.

CharmO1:
And to all those real men who have large hearts and great minds, who have looked past stigma and stereotype to date or marry single mothers, more grease to your elbows. God will enlarge your territory. And to those who are trying to discourage these strong men, just a reminder KARMA is a cold-blooded woman. Don't forget you have sisters, cousins, mothers and will have daughters one day. Single-motherhood didn't stop at my generation, it will continue as long as the earth remains. I don't wish you what has happened to my family but you have clearly forgotten that "what goes around, comes around". And to those juvenile boys who have made and are making ladies single mothers, I leave you to the God of vengeance. He will sort your matter out.

What about if it is karma that is making these women single mothers and have the tables turned on them?

As maternal said, many of these girls would have their head up their arsse and be belligerent to suitors they don't like (or even like) before the single motherhood. Only to be humble and reasonable after they are now at a disadvantage.

It is well known that majority of black women have a stinking attitude when relating to men, unfortunately it is not tattooed on their heads which ones are but it can be comfortably said majority are, so why should men be considerate and self-less to the ones that end up unfortunate?

And don't give us all that "real man", "strong man" crap.

Most women tend to be reasonable mainly only when the disadvantage is theirs. If they face no disadvantage, they are unreasonable and don't consider others' feelings. It is all "me, me, me".

Sagamite:


You need your head examined.

If you resist the examination, then you need to be restrained and have your head smashed with multiple blows from a very good hammer.

maternal:




I have married her. Unlike some she refused to carry my child unless I put a ring on it. She actually has morals.

So if you didn't marry her would she have aborted your child, if so where is the morality in that? You need to stop judging these women when your woman was in the same situation. You are telling these women to keep their legs closed, use protection, well damn, you didn't even use your own wisdom. There is nothing these single moms did that your girl didn't do, the only difference is that she managed to trap you into marriage. Look at yourself before you judge other people.

khiaa:


So if you didn't marry her would she have aborted your child, if so where is the morality in that? You need to stop judging these women when your woman was in the same situation. You are telling these women to keep their legs closed, use protection, well damn, you didn't even use your own wisdom. There is nothing these single moms did that your girl didn't do, the only difference is that she managed to trap you into marriage. Look at yourself before you judge other people.

Even if one was to assume that the act of marriage is one which a woman gets to trap a man into having a union with her, then it is important that women know the right men to trap and not go after men they cannot keep, and unavailable men.

Barring those that are unfortunately widowed, most single mothers are victims of their own recklessness.

Ladies must learn how to tame excessive hypergamy/avoid being war brides/curb excessive irrationality, etc and learn how to accept cold, hard truths. A lot of men do that all the time and grow up becoming what they are, as you like them- reliable, dependable, and effective.

Ego, as bad as it can be when applied wrongly, essentially serves the masculine imperative better than the feminine one.

OmoEziokwu:


Even if one was to assume that the act of marriage is one which a woman gets to trap a man into having a union with her, then it is important that women know the right men to trap and not go after men they cannot keep, and unavailable men.

Barring those that are unfortunately widowed, most single mothers are victims of their own recklessness.

Ladies must learn how to tame excessive hypergamy/avoid being war brides/curb excessive irrationality, etc and learn how to accept cold, hard truths. A lot of men do that all the time and grow up becoming what they are, as you like them- reliable, dependable, and effective.

Ego, as bad as it can be when applied wrongly, essentially serves the masculine imperative better than the feminine one.

lol@ Know the right man to trap.

Remember the men are also baby daddies/single dads they are just as responsible as the women. They should have used protection, they should have kept it in their pants. I hope they aren't producing more unwanted babies.

Why do some of you men (on this forum) see Nigerian women as mean and unapproacable? Some of the things you say about them are unbelievable.

khiaa:
Why do some of you men (on this forum) see Nigerian women as mean and unapproacable? Some of the things you say about them are unbelievable.

Well one tends to meet lots of better informed, cultured and classier women outside the typical Nigerian girl demographic. I couldn't help but agree with this:

Sagamite:


This is probably more likely to be true if you are:

- White
- Black girl from Southern and Eastern Africa
- Black girl that grew up in Europe outside UK
- Not so good looking Black girl.

...and this was in response to some female on this forum who described herself as the definition of love/niceness.

khiaa:


So if you didn't marry her would she have aborted your child, if so where is the morality in that? You need to stop judging these women when your woman was in the same situation. You are telling these women to keep their legs closed, use protection, well damn, you didn't even use your own wisdom. There is nothing these single moms did that your girl didn't do, the only difference is that she managed to trap you into marriage. Look at yourself before you judge other people.

Where did I say she was pregnant before we got married ? Where ? If a woman can judge a broke man down on his luck, or a man behind his mates in terms of success, why can't we judge these women ? Why the double standard ?

The apprehension of marrying a single mom has nothing to do with the child but the child's father.

Sagamite:


What about if it is karma that is making these women single mothers and have the tables turned on them?

As maternal said, many of these girls would have their head up their arsse and be belligerent to suitors they don't like (or even like) before the single motherhood. Only to be humble and reasonable after they are now at a disadvantage.

It is well known that majority of black women have a stinking attitude when relating to men, unfortunately it is not tattooed on their heads which ones are but it can be comfortably said majority are, so why should men be considerate and self-less to the ones that end up unfortunate?

And don't give us all that "real man", "strong man" crap.

Most women tend to be reasonable mainly only when the disadvantage is theirs. If they face no disadvantage, they are unreasonable and don't consider others' feelings. It is all "me, me, me".

Yes oo

Total madness. Can you imagine a broke man selling pure water, living under a bridge, coming up to one of these now holy responsible women asking for their hand in marriage prior to them being baby mama's ? And after she says no, the man now turns into a pastor saying god will bless you if you take me, remember you have a brother and father, karma will do them. And also you are not a real and strong women unless you marry a poor man. Haba he will be the biggest joke of the whole Nigeria for generations to come. Yet these single mothers think they can pull this crap on Nigerian men ?

maternal:


Where did I say she was pregnant before we got married ? Where ? If a woman can judge a broke man down on his luck, or a man behind his mates in terms of success, why can't we judge these women ? Why the double standard ?

It's not right because you don't know these women to jiudge them. How do you know they have judged any man down on his luck, you don't know what goes on in their lives. Let me ask you this question.

Were you hurt because a girl turned you down for not being financially stable.?

Sagamite:


What about if it is karma that is making these women single mothers and have the tables turned on them?

As maternal said, many of these girls would have their head up their arsse and be belligerent to suitors they don't like (or even like) before the single motherhood. Only to be humble and reasonable after they are now at a disadvantage.

It is well known that majority of black women have a stinking attitude when relating to men, unfortunately it is not tattooed on their heads which ones are but it can be comfortably said majority are, so why should men be considerate and self-less to the ones that end up unfortunate?

And don't give us all that "real man", "strong man" crap.

Most women tend to be reasonable mainly only when the disadvantage is theirs. If they face no disadvantage, they are unreasonable and don't consider others' feelings. It is all "me, me, me".

Agreed

But what about majority of black men who find it difficult to understand 'I am not interested or I have a boyfriend', you have no idea how annoying that could be especially if you are the type that hates going back and forth on a simple issue. You have to pretend to be nice while they going on about how much they care for you till you snap, and they resort conveniently to emotional blackmail, 'it wasn't your fault, I was the one that thought you were special or I am good-looking, successful and intelligent enough to get any other if not for my feelings for you bla bla bla'.

I wish they could hear themselves speak


Another category is those who after saying a Capital 'NO' will start treating you like a piece of trash, talk to you as if you are their little siblings, denigrate you like their maidservants. They get so rude and condescending that you have no alternative than to give them a piece of your mind.

I call it emotional torture, and to most the solution lies in saying yes only for them to treat the guys as they deem fit. So whose fault it is? The lady would be blamed and the guy is practically blameless. A lady that says yes after several no(s) is worth investigating , It could be out of genuine reasons like change of mind, realisation, new feelings or not so genuine reasons like an alternative to the 'one' that got away. (Applicable to guys too).

And Most of black guys need lessons on when to back-off, after two tries, leave her the hell alone. Look for someone else. If she is meant for you she will come back to you out of her own volition.





Every woman has to face the problem of choosing one among many all declaring their sincere love to her, it gets more difficult when most black guys literally say 'I love you' to girls they have just met. This is the moment we lose focus, forget what we 'need' and blindly follow what we assume to b the best, the most convincing. Do not forget that social, economic and cultural factors play a huge role on how we make our decisions which I believe those are the causes of the 'stinking attitude', the reasons why we cannot date poor guys

OmoEziokwu:



Lol...the feminine imperative always finds a way. Don't worry, there will always be men to serve that essence.

I think it would be better if people learnt how to own up to the repercussions of their actions and own up to it. rather than seeking palliatives. That is true remorse. Growth is assured, and even if she is ready again for relationships with men, she would be in the best frame of mind to make decisions in her future. Any other way would make her end up as a jaundiced and resentful thing no one wants to deal with. The world owes no one anything.

As you make your bed...

You don't make sense.

maternal:


Unless they are your biological or you work for the UN/ world vision of course they are.

Just remember that you can end up a single father too.
Then don't ask any woman to look after your "burden".

Sagamite:


What about if it is karma that is making these women single mothers and have the tables turned on them?

As maternal said, many of these girls would have their head up their arsse and be belligerent to suitors they don't like (or even like) before the single motherhood. Only to be humble and reasonable after they are now at a disadvantage.

It is well known that majority of black women have a stinking attitude when relating to men, unfortunately it is not tattooed on their heads which ones are but it can be comfortably said majority are, so why should men be considerate and self-less to the ones that end up unfortunate?

And don't give us all that "real man", "strong man" crap.

Most women tend to be reasonable mainly only when the disadvantage is theirs. If they face no disadvantage, they are unreasonable and don't consider others' feelings. It is all "me, me, me".

Having a child is not a disadvantage.
And using single mothers to take revenge on ill-mannered women is actually very sad of you.
Your words may have an impact on innocent kids.

Hope you will never end up as a single father and complain about your "disadvantage".


GOD!

carefreewannabe:


You don't make sense.

You're welcome.

carefreewannabe:


Having a child is not a disadvantage.
And using single mothers to take revenge on ill-mannered women is actually very sad of you.
Your words may have an impact on innocent kids.

Hope you will never end up as a single father and complain about your "disadvantage".


GOD!

First of all, you need to learn to comprehend better.

I could go ahead, AS USUAL, to run you through the mill by asking you very simply:

How did my saying "a woman is now at a disadvantage" equivalent to "her child is a disadvantage"?

And then you would be stuck and look like a jellyfish out of water.

That is the beauty of online forum arguments! Everything you say, just the way you say without any emotional twisting, sugar-coating and ranting shout-downs is there for all to see. It is far better than live verbal arguments for those that like to stick to what is actually said, objectivity, facts and logic.

I did not call the child a "disadvantage", I stated that the child being in the picture puts the woman at a disadvantage.

So, AGAIN, next time comprehend what is said before any feminist outburst.

Now to the logic and facts! ..............You know, those sensible stuff.

YES, having a child is a disadvantage in the mating world, [far far far]⁸ more so for women. It limits the pool of men who would be interested in them, the way they (women) usually want a man to be interested in them i.e. long-term commitment.

Simple FACT! If you still don't get it, get a dictionary to understand the meaning of the word "disadvantage".

A WOMAN HAVING A CHILD IS A DISADVANTAGE IN MATING!

How is it a disadvantage:

1. It gives a perceptive confirmation of lack of impurity and freshness. It somehow subconsciously indicates she is not all yours, someone else had owned her before you. It is also a statement to ALL who know you both that your misses was totally someone else's before. Men are naturally territorial and feminine purity is seen and valued at a premium. A child says "This territory was colonised before", many men with several options might not be willing to take that.

2. Any man going into it, with his head screwed on, has to accept the child(ren) as his and treat them equally as his own. The last time I checked, it cost £220K to raise a child in the UK up to 18 (that is roughly £12K per year). That is a steep price to pay for, or part of for, an action and pleasure that was not his. Even if the babyfather is responsible and chips in well, it is inevitable he would pay somehow (except she was previously married and the courts helped her milk her ex-husband well). Many men with several options might not be willing to pay that price especially for women who don't have a good reputation as nice people, and likely would not consider him in her prime while he was working hard and she was probably chasing bad boys or money bags (as these men see some of the single mothers).

3. A woman with a child finds it harder to date as she is not always available and might even be restricted where she can meet the guy because she does not want to introduce him too early into the child's life. Girls without kids don't have such limitations and it is easier for the guy to hook-up when he feels like. It is more fun.

4. She would prioritise her love and caring for her child. The man is really secondary. As nice as that is in principles, it is not an attractive proposition for men with several propositional options and who is not the father of the child. He can easily get a woman who would make him primary love.

5. Having a family where one child or children is fathered by a different man from the rest does not form the image of a perfect family and wholeness in the current funky society we live in where it is suppose to be about one man - one woman. A society that many would even be pissed at the thought of polygamy and rant and rant and rant out of pure anger. A child or children having to leave their half-siblings to spend some time or special days with their natural father does note make the perfect family in the Western ideals society advocate for now.

6. And if the guy is unlucky, he can even potentially have trouble with baby father or even child leading to potential antagonism or a troubled child.

7. A single mother's body is very much unlikely to be at its prime. She is less likely to be at her most attractive level. You know? That thing (attractiveness) that is the main stuff women need to woo a man.

8. Many African families with sons they see as premium would not accept their prime horse take a single mother and many follow their family expectations.

So to many men, a single mother is perceived as offering less in a mating situation. Offering an inferior proposition. That is what is called a "DISADVANTAGE" for her pulling market.

FACTS and LOGIC! The latter an assetable functionality women struggle to have.

Neither did I say one should use single mothers as revenge for on ill-mannered women. What I said is they should not expect consideration and selflessness from men. Same things most of them (black women) would most likely not offer if they have nothing to gain and the boot was on the other foot as many men have experienced when these girls were at their pprime. I treat people, and believe people should be treated, the way they deserve.

Except their is a mechanism to identify which of them were not shytheads when they had the boot earlier, then unfortunately consideration and selflessness would be in short supply for most of them. I am not a fan of rewarding the wrong people. It is against my fundamental core fcking principles. Some might be individuals with pure personalities that comes through and you will see them in different light, but many are like what Black/Naija women are like, so why should those have men being nice to them when they are inconsiderate and heartless themselves? Why would men come and be saviours for women who, when these women had an upper hand before single motherhood, would have rejected them insultingly and disparagingly if they were suitors?

As I said from the start, it is a personal choice. Those listings would mean some men would not choose single mothers. That lack of choosing is what is called a ............."disadvantage".

carefreewannabe:


Just remember that you can end up a single father too.
Then don't ask any woman to look after your "burden".

Most likely he would not have primary care for the child, so he would not have that much disadvantage.

Many more women than men are willing to tolerate a man with a baby because:

- There is a short supply of eligible men than there is of women.

- Women need relationship more than men.

- It shows a level of badness, something women find attractive in men.

- It quickly turns conversations with women subconsciously into sexual ones or imagery. If you are an Alpha man who understands the G-code, you would know the earlier you turn conversations with women sexual, the more likely you get laid and move far far far away from the friend zone and even the gates to the zone is locked to prevent your future entry. Young boys, jot that fcking shyt down.

- It shows another woman has done the vetting to the point she allowed herself be pregnant, he must be good at something or have some attraction.

- He is someone else's. That turns on the "snatch mode" in many females. [i]Snatch the murrafcker's man!

- Women look at other qualities in men than men look in women. It is more emotional for women.[/i]

Now to the logic and facts! Many more fathers (especially Africans) get to have steady mates more easily than single mothers. As for Jamaican men, they are proficient in that shyt!

Your feminist rages would never make nature politically correct!

Sixix:


Agreed

But what about majority of black men who find it difficult to understand 'I am not interested or I have a boyfriend', you have no idea how annoying that could be especially if you are the type that hates going back and forth on a simple issue. You have to pretend to be nice while they going on about how much they care for you till you snap, and they resort conveniently to emotional blackmail, 'it wasn't your fault, I was the one that thought you were special or I am good-looking, successful and intelligent enough to get any other if not for my feelings for you bla bla bla'.

I wish they could hear themselves speak

If you have been friendly to people and they are taking a piss without getting the clear message, then you are perfectly entitled to tell them to fck off.

Sixix:

Another category is those who after saying a Capital 'NO' will start treating you like a piece of trash, talk to you as if you are their little siblings, denigrate you like their maidservants. They get so rude and condescending that you have no alternative than to give them a piece of your mind.

Giving them your mind is a "Well done" thing.

Sixix:

I call it emotional torture, and to most the solution lies in saying yes only for them to treat the guys as they deem fit. So whose fault it is? The lady would be blamed and the guy is practically blameless. A lady that says yes after several no(s) is worth investigating , It could be out of genuine reasons like change of mind, realisation, new feelings or not so genuine reasons like an alternative to the 'one' that got away. (Applicable to guys too).

You know I don't buy into that weak, defenceless, women-are-victim narratives.

The woman's RESPONSIBILITY is to dismiss the man, not say yes as a response to his persistence and then be "justified" to be mean.

I am sure if I said I shaggged a woman, used her financially and ran because "she was persistent in chasing me", it would not be a justified because I am an adult capable of saying "No".

Sixix:

And Most of black guys need lessons on when to back-off, after two tries, leave her the hell alone. Look for someone else. If she is meant for you she will come back to you out of her own volition.

Couldn't agree more.

If they don't get polite NOs, then women are perfectly entitled to tell them to fck off.

Sixix:

Every woman has to face the problem of choosing one among many all declaring their sincere love to her, it gets more difficult when most black guys literally say 'I love you' to girls they have just met. This is the moment we lose focus, forget what we 'need' and blindly follow what we assume to b the best, the most convincing. Do not forget that social, economic and cultural factors play a huge role on how we make our decisions which I believe those are the causes of the 'stinking attitude', the reasons why we cannot date poor guys

All these ones are weak, defenceless, women-are-victim excuses.

You are adults and equals, have some responsibilities and be responsible for your actions and choices.

It is shocking when the tables turn and some men now have more options and the same "problem" of choosing one among many with lovely but different juicy assets all fighting for his attention and they then sensibly decide to have all instead of just choosing one, you women see it as unfair and start the insulting/disparaging labelling (e.g. Arsehole, baastard, immature, real man not, creep etc) instead of seeing us as poor, weak, defenceless victims.

khiaa:

Let me ask you this question.

Were you hurt because a girl turned you down for not being financially stable.?

A more sensible way of asking the question is:

"Were you enlightened because some girls showed you that they can be mean and inconsiderate when you have less finances?"

Rationality is not the forte of most women, to their own detriment. Most men must be out of their minds for expecting them to be so

OmoEziokwu:
Rationality is not the forte of most women, to their own detriment. Most men must be out of their minds for expecting them to be so

Chris Rock said it best.

We start an argument with women with a complete handicap.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXj69RAUIbs

databoy247:
I have often been in hot conversations with other peeps, and most of them sound like it's a taboo to get married to a lady who has a child (maybe out of wedlock). It's usually cool when they as guys having one or two kids wants a lady to get married to them but when its the reverse, na war.

Wat's behind this mentality? And are single unmarried ladies who already have a child actually "bad" like the society paint the picture? Am not a traditionalist so i really dont discriminate but my peeps sometimes see me as someone who have "lost it" cos i dont see anything wrong with single ladies (with a kid). Your views pls....

No! If I'm not satisfied with the Story behind the child.






Truth be told, it takes a strong decision to marry one, because you will have many families to deal with (your family, in-law and the baby's father people).



You marry a single lady, there are many issues to trash, talkmore of adding to your burden as a young man newly going into marriage.

Sagamite:


First of all, you need to learn to comprehend better.

The problem is NOT that I do not comprehend better, the problem is that I comprehend your motifs too well.

I could go ahead, AS USUAL, to run you through the mill by asking you very simply:

How did my saying "a woman is now at a disadvantage" equivalent to "her child is a disadvantage"?

And then you would be stuck and look like a jellyfish out of water.

You are very good at finding minor flaws in people's argumentation structure but fail to come up with your own argumentation.
When asked you will say things like "Disgust is my argument but not my only one." Disgust is not even an argument and the others are left for people to guess. So much for the illusion of e-victories.

Now to your question. When you say that a woman is at a disadvantage for having a child then it means the same as the child is a disadvantage to her.

And then on a different occasion you will say that women getting custody in the West have an advantage. What a contradiction.
Is it according to your own argumentation here not actually the other way round?

That is the beauty of online forum arguments! Everything you say, just the way you say without any emotional twisting, sugar-coating and ranting shout-downs is there for all to see. It is far better than live verbal arguments for those that like to stick to what is actually said, objectivity, facts and logic.

I have no problem, unlike you, debating on and offline. I can do both.
You think you are objective? What is your objectivity based on? Disgust? Prejudice?

Emotional twisting coupled with word twisting is your forte, not mine.

I did not call the child a "disadvantage", I stated that the child being in the picture puts the woman at a disadvantage.

Of course you didn't call the child a disadvantage directly but saying that having a child is a disadvantage is pretty much the same thing.
And then again, when having a child is a disadvantage for a woman, how do the laws, you constantly lament over, favor women?
Let me see the logic that explains that.

So, AGAIN, next time comprehend what is said before any feminist outburst.

Next time remind yourself that your SUBJECTIVE experiences with women are the reason why you come to a thread asking women if karma is the reason for what they may be going through. So much for objectivity and logic. Karma.

Now to the logic and facts! ..............You know, those sensible stuff.


YES, having a child is a disadvantage in the mating world, [far far far]⁸ more so for women. It limits the pool of men who would be interested in them.

And I guess you assume that women don't mind dating single fathers.
(Let me guess, you will now say that men are not the ones who children stay with. On the next thread you will, however argue, that custody laws granting women custody are an advantage. Objectivity.)

Simple FACT! If you still don't get it, get a dictionary to understand the meaning of the word "disadvantage".

A WOMAN HAVING A CHILD IS A DISADVANTAGE IN MATING!

A man having a child will also have a restricted pool of possible partners.
I guess, you can only see one part of the reality, the one that you want to see to feel better or just the one that will make someone else feel bad.

How is it a disadvantage:

1. It gives a perceptive confirmation of lack of impurity and freshness. It somehow subconsciously indicates she is not all yours, someone else had owned her before you. It is also a statement to ALL who know you both that your misses was totally someone else's before. Men are naturally territorial and feminine purity is seen and valued at a premium. A child says "This territory was colonised before", many men with several options might not be willing to take that.

Which woman wants a man who thinks and says that MOTHERHOOD makes a woman impure?
Answer: Only a desperate woman.
Therefore, if my pool was reduced due to the fact that a man thinks like this, I would be GRATFUL that such men stay away from me without having to tell them to.

Moreover, do you actually assume that women do not prefer men who will be only the fathers of their kids?
Do you assume women have no problem with kids who are not theirs?

2. Any man going into it, with his head screwed on, has to accept the child(ren) as his and treat them equally as his own. The last time I checked, it cost £220K to raise a child in the UK up to 18 (that is roughly £12 per year). That is a steep price to pay for, or part of for, an action that was not his. Even if the babyfather is responsible and chips in well, it is inevitable he would pay somehow (except she was previous married and the courts helped her milk her ex-husband well). Many men with several options might not be willing to pay that price especially for women who don't have a good reputation as nice people, and likely would not consider him in her prime while he was working hard and she was probably chasing bad boys or money bags (as these men see some of the single mothers).

If a woman meets a man who has one baby mama (or more) somewhere, do you think she doesn't consider the cost of it, which is not only financial?

3. A woman with a child finds it harder to date as she is not always available and might even be restricted where she can meet the guy because she does not want to introduce him too early into the child's life. Girls without kids don't have such limitations and it is easier for the guy to hook-up when he feels like. It is more fun.

Again, how do laws that AUTOMATICALLY give women the custody for kids favor them then? I asked you this question on the other thread and then you used your deviation tactics and slogans to shrug it off. Now here we are again.

Besides, a man who ALREADY has children himself is restricted too as he will have to (provided he cares about his children) spend time with his kids at least on every second weekend.

I guess the logic and objectivity you always refer to, Mr Intellectual God, is so clouded that you can only jump from thread to thread and use your arguments without seeing the whole picture to employ your scare tactics to make women behave nicer. I guess, you should be the only one who has the luxury of showing arrogance and be proud of it.

4. She would prioritise her love and caring for her child. The man is really secondary. As nice as that is in principles, it is not an attractive proposition for men with several propositional options.

Good you know it. And because for a mother her child/ren will always have priority, she will never think of herself as someone who is at a disadvantage because a partner, especially when the children are very young, be it the biological father or not, is her PRIORITY and FOCUS.

I remember when a friend of mine who was separated from her baby father would tell men within the first half an hour of their first encounter about her child and PROUDLY show photos of her son. I know it because I witnessed it when we went out. The fact that some men might refuse to date her because of that did not even bother her a bit.

Another friend with a child who was searching for a new relationship online would post photos of her and her daughter. Everyone should see that either they accept her with her child or not at all. And she wouldn't give a damn if that would limit her options. She still didn't consider HAVING a child a disadvantage.

I am afraid, you cannot understand the love of a mother and therefore how she will never consider HAVING a child a disadvantage.

5. Having a family where one child is fathered by a different man than the rest does not form the image of a perfect family and wholeness in the current funky society we live in where it is suppose to be about one man - one woman. A society that many would even be pissed at the thought of polygamy and rant and rant and rant out of pure anger. A child or children having to leave their half-siblings to spend some time or special days with their natural father does note make the perfect family in the Western ideals society advocate for now.

There are plenty of the so called patchwork families in the West. It has become a very ordinary family type.

6. And if the guy is unlucky, he can even potentially have trouble with baby father or even child leading to potential antagonism or a troubled child.

I guess, your objectivity made you forget that this happens between a baby mother and a new girlfriend, too.

7. A single mother's body is very much unlikely to be at its prime. She is less likely to be at her most attractive level. You know? That thing (attractiveness) that is the main stuff women need to woo a man.

I know plenty of well-to-do men who are married to ordinary women. You may, however, use celebrities to prove your point.
And keep deceiving yourself that physical attractiveness is not important to women. And then tell yourself that MoST men have the capability to make so much money that it will buy them "love".

And I will tell you that even a woman in her 50s will have greater chances with men than you with women. Bitter truth.

8. Many African families with sons they see as premium would not accept their prime horse take a single mother and many follow their family expectations.

Yeah but they will happily sell off their daughters to old, ugly, men if his account is fat and shapeless. And Sagamite will STILL use feminism to indirectly insult someone.

So to many men, a single mother is perceived as offering less in a mating situation. Offering an inferior proposition. That is what is called a "DISADVANTAGE" for her pulling market.

FACTS and LOGIC! The latter an assetable functionality women struggle to have.

You forgot objectivity that makes you remind women of how they have to please men in their twenties and how it makes you forget that fathers with children have limited options too. Equation.

Neither did I say one should use single mothers as revenge for on ill-mannered women. What I said is they should not expect consideration and selflessness from men. Same things most of them (black women) would most likely not offer if they have nothing to gain and the boot was on the other foot as many men have experienced when these girls were at their pprime. I treat people, and believe people should be treated, the way they deserve.

You take revenge on women on every possible occasion. You use scare tactics to put yourself in a position of power. This reveals a lot about you.

Except their is a mechanism to identify which of them were not shytheads when they had the boot earlier, then unfortunately consideration and selflessness would be in short supply for most of them. I am not a fan of rewarding the wrong people. It is against my fundamental core fcking principles. Some might be individuals with pure personalities that comes through and you will see them in different light, but many are like what Black/Naija women are like, so why should those have men being nice to them when they are inconsiderate and heartless themselves? Why would men come and be saviours for women who, when these women had an upper hand before single motherhood, would have rejected them insultingly and disparagingly if they were suitors?

In other words, except there are mechanisms to identify "shytheads" you will insult the innocent ones too.

As I said from the start, it is a personal choice. Those listings would mean some men would not choose single mothers. That lack of choosing is what is called a ............."disadvantage".

You could have said it without having to offend anyone.
And even if the dating pool for some women reduces from 1000 men to 500 men, a child is not a reason to think of oneself as disadvantage.

And the fact that many men cannot comprehend it, is the reason why custody is granted to MOTHERS in the first place.
Blame yourself!

A MOTHER will accept her limited options and still choose her child without seeing herself as disadvantaged.

Sagamite:


A more sensible way of asking the question is:

"Were you enlightened because some girls showed you that they can be mean and inconsiderate when you have less finances?"

Abajo

Hell No!

Sagamite:


Most likely he would not have primary care for the child, so he would not have that much disadvantage.

I thought the law that grants women custody favors them. It is now a disadvantage? Very logical.

Many more women than men are willing to tolerate a man with a baby because:

- There is a short supply of eligible men than there is of women.

Proof?

- Women need relationship more than men.

Proof?

- It shows a level of badness, something women find attractive in men.

Proof?

- It quickly turns conversations with women subconsciously into sexual ones or imagery. If you are an Alpha man who understands the G-code, you would know the earlier you turn conversations with women sexual, the more likely you get laid and move far far far away from the friend zone and even the gates to the zone is locked to prevent your future entry. Young boys, jot that fcking shyt down.

You have to use tactics to have s*ex. I don't. Bad luck.

- It shows another woman has done the vetting to the point she allowed herself be pregnant, he must be good at something or have some attraction.

Nope.

- He is someone else's. That turns on the "snatch mode" in many females. [i]Snatch the murrafcker's man!

As if men don't like to do it.

- Women look at other qualities in men than men look in women. It is more emotional for women.[/i]

This is why I have been repeatedly annoyed by how clingy some men become.

Now to the logic and facts! Many more fathers (especially Africans) get to have steady mates more easily than single mothers. As for Jamaican men, they are proficient in that shyt!

Totally out of context as it is very normal in Jamaican culture to have kids out of wedlock.

Your feminist rages would never make nature politically correct!

And your snappish remarks will never put you in a more favorable position than mine.

carefreewannabe:


I thought the law that grants women custody favors them. It is now a disadvantage? Very logical.



Proof?



Proof?



Proof?



You have to use tactics to have s*ex. I don't. Bad luck.



Nope.



As if men don't like to do it.



This is why I have been repeatedly annoyed by how clingy some men become.



Totally out of context as it is very normal in Jamaican culture to have kids out of wedlock.



And your snappish remarks will never put you in a more favorable position than mine.

I love the way you argue using semantics

OmoEziokwu:
Rationality is not the forte of most women, to their own detriment. Most men must be out of their minds for expecting them to be so

And if men stop behaving like this ...



... I will agree that they are more rational than women.