One thing i like about this section is, there are so many matured minds here.
Some said marriage is sweet, beautiful and all that, but even with all the sweet comments couples give about their marriages, we still see high rate of divorce, violence and separation.
In the society today, you see so many matured men and women due for marriage, but there are not given it consideration at all.
so many are scared. others, lost interest due to horrible heart break experiences and so many reasons.
i know marriage is not a do or die affairs, but it looks good and mystery some how. imagine two people with different upbringing, background. coming together to tolerate each other, Iive as one till the end of time, it looks amazing.
Now to those already in their marriage, pls enlighten us.
1. how do you feel being married? do you feel chain/tied down by one person for the rest of your life, or how do you see it?
2. what are the things that happen in marriage that change everything forever. like sins that cant be forgiven. its common with men once a women cheats, its unforgivable. although i dont support cheating either.
3. what words of advice can you give a young man/lady who desire marriage but scared. based on what you are experiencing now either positive or negative. what can you tell someone who is afraid of entering into marriage, so he/she don't fail (divorce).
pls honest contributions pls
Thank you.

Any married man or lady should come borrow this space and contribute meaningfully to the thread.
I never marry.

amaprincess: One thing i like about this section is, there are so many matured minds here.
Some said marriage is sweet, beautiful and all that, but even with all the sweet comments couples give about their marriages, we still see high rate of divorce, violence and separation.
In the society today, you see so many matured men and women due for marriage, but there are not given it consideration at all.
so many are scared. others, lost interest due to horrible heart break experiences and so many reasons.
i know marriage is not a do or die affairs, but it looks good and mystery some how. imagine two people with different upbringing, background. coming together to tolerate each other, Iive as one till the end of time, it looks amazing.
Now to those already in their marriage, pls enlighten us.
1. how do you feel being married? do you feel chain/tied down by one person for the rest of your life, or how do you see it?
2. what are the things that happen in marriage that change everything forever. like sins that cant be forgiven. its common with men once a women cheats, its unforgivable. although i dont support cheating either.
3. what words of advice can you give a young man/lady who desire marriage but scared. based on what you are experiencing now either positive or negative. what can you tell someone who is afraid of entering into marriage, so he/she don't fail (divorce).
pls honest contributions pls
Thank you.

1. I feel united with someone I can travel through life with. Who accepts me as I am and lets me be me - no, she encourages me to be me, and makes me want to be better for her.

2. Don't know/not applicable, but with remorse and repentance, anything can be forgiven

3. First, prepare yourself. Be mature and of sound character. Properly understand marriage for what it is for, what it does. Form a consistent worldview/theology of marriage. Then find someone you fancy like mad, who is of sound character, and who shares that worldview, or who is at least on the same path. Commit to them, marry, them, live happily ever after !

There, proper marriage in a few easy steps.


Best
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Don't get married!.............My advice

No

amaprincess:
1. how do you feel being married? do you feel chain/tied down by one person for the rest of your life, or how do you see it?
2. what are the things that happen in marriage that change everything forever. like sins that cant be forgiven. its common with men once a women cheats, its unforgivable. although i dont support cheating either.
3. what words of advice can you give a young man/lady who desire marriage but scared. based on what you are experiencing now either positive or negative. what can you tell someone who is afraid of entering into marriage, so he/she don't fail (divorce).
pls honest contributions pls

1. Marriage is the second best feeling to heaven (if you marry your friend) and hell (when you marry a stranger). Marry your friend. It gets to a time in life when it's no longer about the beauty, the six packs, the way s/he walks/smiles, how strong/romantic s/he is in bed e.t.c. It gets to a time when it's no longer how much you love him/her, but how much you want to be with him/her. How much of each other's company you enjoy. If you have to endure through a 3 straight hours of just sitting down and talking, then i doubt how much of your friend he/she is.

2. There is no such thing as 100% perfect marriage. They have lived happily together as husband and wife for 50 years does not mean it was all honey. Healthy communication opens up the room for forgiveness. ...and yes, I mean, no matter the sin.

3. Scared of what? Being imprisoned? Yes, I agree with you. Marriage is a prison. But my point in (1) above determines what kind of prison (fun or pain). Marry your friend.

In my grandpa's words, "Yes, I agree that it is most important you love each other, but love is not the glue that keeps you together forever, friendship is"

Huh?

.

Nope

[b]Advice for those too chicken to get married..


To be Honest, marriage is not rocket science. The difference between marriage and dating is that piece of paper that allows you both to conjugate legally. There is no right age per se or time per se to be married, just the right person. There are days when you will feel trapped, there are days when your ex looks like she/he should have been the one, there are days when you will feel like maybe I should have waited a bit longer, there are days when you would wish to take a months leave from marriage and go enjoy life a bit and then return, there are days when you will miss the single life, there are days when you just want to kill your partner and get the life insurance money and then run off to a tropical Island and live happily ever after in a house full of vixens . But all these still does not make marriage any less fun.

All you need is the right person and the right attitude.. Someone you are emotionally, psychologically, domestically, physically, financially and intellectually in sync with and above all Comfortable with. Someone who makes you comfortable and puts your troubled mind at ease. A person who is both friend, confidant, therapist, Pastor, parent, etc to you. Someone you respect and trust.

Now like with everything in life, mistakes do happen where we choose the wrong person for what we thought then to be the right reasons, etc.. and it's okay to make such mistakes, that is why divorce is an available option for couples in distressed marriages. Feel free to break up from a bad and irredeemable marriage and start again as I don't agree that all marriages are for life or that a person should be forced to be in an unhappy marriage no matter what. But this still shouldn't discourage a person from getting married. The number of divorce still isn't higher than those of long lasting marriages. It's just that you hear more about divorces than marriage anniversaries as bad news spreads faster.


When you are in a good marriage, you never or rather rarely ever feel trapped..

Secondly.. There is no such thing as an unforgivable sin in marriage.. What's unforgivable is repetition. So say he slaps you once, it's nothing. But when it becomes a habit that is recurrent, then it's abusive and that relationship is toxic.

My advice for those who want to get married is simple... If you are convinced in your heart and in your head that you have met the right person, please go ahead and get married. Should it later become apparent that you have made a mistake by marrying your partner, get a divorce immediately. [/b]

I'm so scared of marriage. I have serious trust issues especially with women. . . Perhaps I better not get married

Why should You be scared of getting married in the first place? If your papa and mama were scared, do u think you will be alive to type this Jamb Question?


Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (Salallahu Alyhi Wassalam) has said, "O youthful people, if any of you have the means to, he should get married, as it lowers the eyesight and protects the private parts. Those who have not the ability to do so should fast, as it will be a shield for him." (Bukhari and Muslim).

Just pretend evrytin is alright even wen dey ar nt 2 avoid stories dat touches d heart

Y buy d cow wen u can get d milk 4 free (Albert Essien renouned pysicist 1887)

My advice is;

"IF YOU ARE SCARED, THEN DONT EVER BOTHER OF GETTING MARRIED!"

People aren't scared of getting married, but the way some spouces change after marriage plus this " no money, no love " belief. I guess its poverty they are scared of

Why scared,its not a do,or die affair.

Choose your partner carefully,else there would be a prison break.

Divorce is an option.

Don't get married till you stop being scared

If your parent were scared... they wouldn't have given birth to you.
In marriage, you risk anything risk able

Go and it shall be well wid u In JESUS name!!!!Cikena

Kill every spirit of nagging,,,

I get the jitters whenever I think about it. I'm yet to marry.

I'm even thinking of doing a night weeding not scared of marriage though

I like the idea of marriage; chilling with the love of your life and your kids and having someone to share with. Only with a good/faithful woman tho which is very hard to find.

Honestly, the moment I think about marriage I get scared, I imagine how someone will be tied to another.
As a bachelor i can do anything I like come back any time without anyone questioning me

Not that people are really scared, the problem is multifaced; ranging from fear of the unknown, fear to commit, and most importantly finance.

This Thread is for Singles like me.