I have being married for three years now and I am honestly enjoying marriage. i have the following advice to give:

Marriage is like a building supported by 5 pillars...if these pillars are kept in good condition, the marriage will be healthy, but being as it may, you don't always have all the pillars in good condition most times, just do your best, and leave the rest for God to handle. Well out of these five pillars we have the major pillars and the minor pillars.

A. Finances (major): Money answereth all things...especially in marriage because in marriage, your needs grow, for example, when you first got married, its you and your partner, but soon children will join, if you started with one room and a parlor you will have to move to two bedroom flat and the money will be higher, soon those children will start school, you will soon need more than one car and so on and so forth...there is no romance with finance, they say. Couples must device a means of making, managing, monitoring and multiplying their finances and marital cashflow issues at much as possible to avoid a crack in this pillar.

B. Communication and character discovery (Major): many lovers don't understand that courtship and marriage are not the same thing, while you are dating you power up LOVE, but when you are married, you power up COMMITMENT to one another. this can only be achieved by constant communication and coping with the new discoveries in the character of your partner. Truth is, the moment you guys stop talking about how you feel, your pains and your pleasures, the marriage starts dying. that is why a listening ear is a good quality in marriage. In marriage, no problem is small when there is no communication and no problem is too big to handle if there is smooth and healthy communication between partners.

C. Family, traditions and culture (minor): A lot of marriages break up because they major in this pillar which is supposed to be a minor pillar. When you start to allow extended family members pork-nose into the affairs of your marriage, that is like deliberately introducing a trojan into your database, you are crippling your marriage gradually, partners most understand that traditions and cultures are different which is a major factor in the upbringing of an individual which affects thier behavoiur, perspective and their response to pain and pleasure. Unfortunately, you have to discover your partner's behaviour over time, in fact over years to be truthful. so it is expedient that you understand that tradition and culture should not stand in the way of your Love and commitment to your partner.

D. Emotions and SEX life (minor): Many times, people get into marriage simply because they are so eager to have sex constantly with a particular person, only to be surprised that sex alone should not be your reason for getting into marriage. Now this pillar simply deals with knowledge. If you are ignorant about emotions and the damage it can do if not checked, your marriage will suffer a looootttttttt!! why? because half of the time, you will be making emotional decisions than objective decisions. you have to study emotional intelligence and its merits to marriages. secondly, if there is a problem in the bedroom, there will be a problem in the kitchen as well. So couples should learn about intimate positions, gender related problems in the bedroom and learn to talk freely and nasty[i][/i] when you guys are together, just to mention a few.

E. Matters of FAITH (major): The holy book says: a three fold chord can not be easily broken... God is the binding force in every marriage. A marriage is like a canoe in the ocean, you can never tell what you will meet in the open sea, that is where you need God, the problems in marriage are too numerous for you to attempt shoulder it alone without him, you will sink like Peter. A family that prays together, stays together, that was a quote from one of our marriage counselors when we were planning our marriage. Keep God abreast and lean not on your own understanding, and he will always be there to make a way when there seems to be no way.

Remember, when Solomon was blind, the most effective way he destroyed his enemies was by bringing down the pillars of their temple, same way when the devil wants to destroy a marriage, he pulls down the Pillars or applying pressure such that they begin to crack and give way.

Take a close look at any marriage that broke up, something went wrong with one, two or more of the pillars above.

I hope this has being really informative and thank you for reading

epistle

Just incase

Op na Solomon abi Samson?