*It would seem that "Code and Conducts" don't only apply to side chicks.

How To Have An Affair And Not Get Caught

by 'Married But Living Single'

I am a late 30's married, educated, professional , handsome male and I have had numerous affairs. Right or wrong, it is what it is. The following is a list of must-do's if you plan on having an affair and not getting caught.

All of the following are based on firsthand lessons learned:

1. Date/sleep with only people who are also married. Single men/women are nothing but trouble. While the logistics may be easier, they are never satisfied with the amount of time you can spend with them, they become jealous of your significant other, and they have nothing to lose and generally do not care much about getting caught. And, unless they are perfectly willing to date you despite the fact you are married, it involves creating elaborate lies about being separated and all that nonsense. That's not to mention the fact that once your single lover finds out you're lying, they usually go straight to your spouse to "get even". Other married people offer protection in that they also generally do not wish to be found out. Not to mention the fact that there is a reasonable expectation amongst the two of you that responsibilities may make either of you unavailable. Cancellations are not held against you like they are with single people.

2. Never use your own home or the other person's home for your activities. While it may be more expensive, there is zero chance of your significant other walking in on you if you are in a hotel with the door locked. No surprise returns at the last minute to worry about. Additionally, having your lover in your home inevitably means there is evidence left behind - the scent of them in your bed, a hair that is a different color than your spouse's, a forgotten item of clothing.

3. When arranging for a hotel, never use your credit card to reserve it. Hotels will often tell you "the card is only used to hold the room, no charges will be made." Inevitably, some retard at the hotel runs the card mistakenly, or they use it after you have stayed there to cover anything you didn't settle up on (parking, a phone call, whatever). Once your significant other sees a hotel charge on the card, the gig is up. Instead, slowly withdraw cash over the course of weeks (so as not to draw attention) and keep it in a secret place to pay for your rooms in cash. Reserve the room using a pre-paid debit card or go to the hotel in person to make the reservation and pre-pay it with your cash. If you are having a regular get-together with your lover, try to use the same place over and over. Develop a relationship with the staff. Hotels will only let you check in after 3pm. Most early check-ins are at 1pm. If you are meeting during the day and need it earlier than that, call ahead and tell them you are travelling and need a room to participate in a conference call or to prepare for an event that takes place early in the day.

4. Become more adaptable when it comes to traditional female-male roles. Don't be afraid to split the costs of outings, hotels, meals. It's easier for each of you to explain a $25 lunch than it is for one of you to explain the $50 lunch. Paying for the $140 hotel room is easier to hide if you each pay half. While women may expect men to cover most things, and men may feel a sense of responsibility to do so, your chances of being discovered decrease if you remain flexible.

5. Adapt the Osama Bin Laden communication methodology. That is, absolutely no texting or phone calls on your cell. Instead, create an anonymous yahoo or gmail account and access it ONLY when you are at work. Never email from home, it's just not worth it. There are too many keystroke programs out there that record what you have typed that can easily be installed without your knowledge.

6. Delete, delete, delete. This means everything. Delete all emails from your lover, even if they have photos you want to keep. Delete all your sent emails. Delete your deleted emails. Delete the history each and every time you use the computer. I learned this the hard way when one of my lovers saved her favorite saucy emails despite telling me she was deleting and her significant other busted her with a keystroke program and got into her email account by finding her password (yes, she used her home computer).

7. Always pay in cash for everything that you do together. Dinners, lunches, outings, EVERYTHING. It's not very hard to figure out that the lunch you claim to have had by yourself in town should not have cost $75 when it shows up on your credit card.

8. Adapt a policy of working out, dressing well, and wearing cologne/perfume every day. Nothing stands out to your significant other like a sudden need to change your appearance and/or the way you present yourself. It's called "change detection". Like a cop who patrols the same beat every day and expects the area to look a certain way, he will quickly notice any change. If you are a slob most every day of the week, and all of the sudden you are going "to lunch with an old friend" and you are dressed to the nines and smelling great, your significant other will get suspicious. If you gradually start to make yourself presentable EVERY day, they won't think there is anything amiss.

9. Don't save momentos or tokens that remind you of your lover. No panties, no t-shirts, no jewelry, NOTHING. If you don't have anything to be discovered, you never have anything to explain.

10. Always shower after meeting with your lover. This is obvious. While it may not be obvious to you, the scent of another woman/man is a dead giveaway and very noticeable to your significant other. This is especially true with women. They can detect even the perfume of another woman that you did nothing more than embrace for a prolonged period of time. If you have a shower at your workplace, use it after meeting. If you meet at a hotel, always take one before going back to work or home.

DISCLAIMER: Ashley Madison is the online personals & dating destination for casual encounters, married dating, discreet encounters and extramarital affairs. Ashley Madison does not encourage anyone to stray. In fact, if you are having difficulty with your relationship, you should seek counseling. However, if you still feel that you will seek a person other than your partner to fill your unmet needs, then we truly believe that our service is the best place to start. At Ashley Madison, you can communicate with other like-minded adults who may be more sympathetic to your circumstances. You never compromise your safety, privacy or security and will never have to reveal your identity unless you choose to. You can go at your own pace and change your mind any time you wish.

Source: ashleymadison.com / Spam Mail Advert

Hmmmm....

Na wa oh! Dis is an advanced cheating course, aka cheating 2.0

What of dudes that follow the rules and still get caught?
There's more to this life than having extramarital affair and living with the fear of being caught OR trying to convince yourself you're doing the right thing when you know its the opposite.

TrollMan:
Very stúpid thread.

Very stupid spam advert...but very interesting AND informative.