CHoccolaTE:
Majority of men are just noise makers and braggarts. Take what they say seriously at your own peril . People that can wash their gf clothes and sponsor her recharge card bills from 100 to 400 level will come online and be forming no-nonsense hard guys. Abegii.

Should relationships be about that though?
Do you think being in relationship is enough reason to be indebted to someone at that stage of one's life?

jaybee3:

Should relationships be about that though?
Do you think being in relationship is enough reason to be indebted to someone at that stage of one's life?

No. Not at all. But men are far more willing to spend on girls in real life than they are willing to admit. Especially if she is fine. The finer she is, the more they spend; even without her asking. So what's with the online pretense?

CHoccolaTE:
No. Not at all. But men are far more willing to spend on girls in real life than they are willing to admit. Especially if she is fine. The finer she is, the more they spend; even without her asking. So what's with the online pretense?

Yes you are right but that's because they choose to not because it's the girl's God given right to demand such

jaybee3:

Yes you are right but that's because they choose to not because it's the girl's God given right to demand such

Sure thing. Spending or doing things for others should be done cos of personal choice because the truth is that once you are an adult, nobody is under any obligation to buy anything for you or make you feel better about yourself or stroke your ego . But relationships, whether between two people dating or between friends or family, tend to work better when those involved sacrifice and do nice things for each other and yes women should spend on men, it shouldn't be one sided. But with the way African men are so patriarchal they interpret a woman spending equally like her boyfriend to mean that she is trying to rule over him or exert authority over him or even to mean that she is desperate for marriage even when she has good intentions. This is why many girls just don't bother to do it and have even started seeing it as something wrong and abnormal.

An independent woman is one who doesn't depend on anyone for a living, she is capable of taking care of her needs. That doesn't mean she doesn't get help but she believes no one is responsible for her upkeep except herself...

Una don start again bah! Independent abi? OK na.... Fact: Every woman is dependent. If not for any other thing, at least to obtain the title "Mrs" and get another family name. Anyone saying otherwise?

An independent woman is one who doesn't depend on anyone for a living, she is capable of taking care of her needs. That doesn't mean she doesn't need help but she believes no one is responsible for her upkeep except herself...

Fit2Rule:
Una don start again bah! Independent abi? OK na.... Fact: Every woman is dependent. If not for any other thing, at least to obtain the title "Mrs" and get another family name. Anyone saying otherwise?

What makes you think every woman cares for the title? I tell you that if not for children and society , walai most women would not get married and now that the world is gradually doing away with all the primitive thinking, more woman will stay single.

Btw, who marry these women? If the men are so sure they can do without woman, why go through all the hassles to get married?

CHoccolaTE:
Sure thing. Spending or doing things for others should be done cos of personal choice because the truth is that once you are an adult, nobody is under any obligation to buy anything for you or make you feel better about yourself or stroke your ego . But relationships, whether between two people dating or between friends or family, tend to work better when those involved sacrifice and do nice things for each other and yes women should spend on men, it shouldn't be one sided. But with the way African men are so patriarchal they interpret a woman spending equally like her boyfriend to mean that she is trying to rule over him or exert authority over him or even to mean that she is desperate for marriage even when she has good intentions. This is why many girls just don't bother to do it and have even started seeing it as something wrong and abnormal.

You've said it all.

freecocoa:
What makes you think every woman cares for the title? I tell you that if not for children and society , walai most women would not get married and now that the world is gradually doing away with all the primitive thinking, more woman will stay single.

Women stay single in the west because most of them still leech on men in the name of state sponsored alimony and child support after separation. Check out the statistic on divorce rate before and after no force divorce was introduced. You will discover that many women know that they cannot cope without a man that is why they choose to remain in a marriage pre no force divorce law. But as soon as they were promised bulk of the man's earning through alimony and child support plus his house, many of them started making noise about being strong independent women where as there is nothing independent about them. Why should a man support you (Alimony) after you both choose to go your own way?
They survive mostly on the man's earning and also inherit the house that he would have solely completed mortgage payment on most times.

freecocoa:
What makes you think every woman cares for the title? I tell you that if not for children and society , walai most women would not get married and now that the world is gradually doing away with all the primitive thinking, more woman will stay single.

Btw, who marry these women? If the men are so sure they can do without woman, why go through all the hassles to get married?

Like you said, children and society. And yes, every woman (except those in the convent) needs that title.

freecocoa:
So I created this thread to get better views on who/what people think/believe an independent woman is/should be. A lady (firstEva) talked about her boyfriend having two cars yet she has to 'trek' about town, asking if it isn't selfish of him not to give her one, now I see nothing wrong in her wanting to share her boyfriend's car, only thing is, she didn't ask but almost everyone sounded like she committed a heinous crime for even just harboring the thought of ever using his car, shior! .

I believe an independent woman is one who can take care of herself but that doesn't mean she can't ask her man for stuffs when she needs it and ofcourse he gets to do same.

I'm only asking because from what I read yesterday, people sounded like an Independent woman is one who doesn't ask her man for anything whatsoever, I come dey wonder, if I can share my body, my time, my brain, my energy etc with my man, what then is a 'ducking' car?

an independent is a freal of nature ,an abnormal woman who if helped will realise before it is too late ,unless she decides for the seminary,that she needs a man as sooner or later the intimacy gadgets that enhances the independence and the finance that was once a blessings becomes a big curse.why not be an interdependent woman instead?.

DailyNews:
hehe, Jmoore, abeg o, if u don't have enough cash now eh, pls n pls make it a top priority to find a girlfriend o, I am serious cos if u eventually succeed in getting some cash, acquiring good ride/crib and have no existing good girlfriend u can reckon on, my brother u will be confused! In fact, ur name will become confusion cos all ladies u will be meeting will all be forming too angelic that u won't even know who is who again; and its so scary!

So start now o to de find o, dnt wait till d money arrives cos its risky, unless u are ready to stay single for long, though it hurts sometimes wen u see ur mates with their pretty kids, chei

Preach brother!

I wish someone gave me this advice way back. These days I don tire for ladies, the ones wey no dey even reply my greetings before now dey collect my pin from there friends, dey ping me morning and night dey ask hey hun 'how are you?' 'have you eaten?' 'how was work today?' and even laff at some of my dry jokes. I go just dey look them say, who be your hun?

Honestly wish I had a serious girl from way back, when things never make sense.

Honestly i

Niteezy:
yet he can bang her when he didn't contribute anything to bring her up and has not put a ring on her finger nt 2 talk of taking her 2 d alter. Smh

holy poo! ,bang her you say? . . Guys have 6secs of heavenly feeling,girls have 23secs ,he didnt rape her,she gave herself willingly and she enjoyed the sex mor dan d guy . . U have no point bro.

An independent woman is a woman that you cant go to bed with if you dont have plenty cash in your pocket.

Financially ok

freecocoa:
If you can't criticize constructively, I suggest you don't quote me because if I decide to go that lane, na you go run, better ask around.

yes ma/sir
Apologies

An independent woman gives out and never expects any in return. That's the least I was able to extract from few ladies I had come across.

enioluwaselore:


Preach brother!

I wish someone gave me this advice way back. These days I don tire for ladies, the ones wey no dey even reply my greetings before now dey collect my pin from there friends, dey ping me morning and night dey ask hey hun 'how are you?' 'have you eaten?' 'how was work today?' and even laff at some of my dry jokes. I go just dey look them say, who be your hun?

Honestly wish I had a serious girl from way back, when things never make sense.

Honestly i

my brother its not easy at all. Its a bad situation in d country, God will help us

CHoccolaTE:
Majority of men are just noise makers and braggarts. Take what they say seriously at your own peril . People that can wash their gf clothes and sponsor her recharge card bills from 100 to 400 level will come online and be forming no-nonsense hard guys. Abegii.

U still don't get!! Majority of men know that you have to spend for your girlfriend, but majority of them are not going to give a car to their gf because she wants it. Most men would run away from a GF who's making such a ridiculous demand. Giving out a car is reserved for wifey or engaged and about to be married gfs. Here is how most men would reason, she's going to demand for a Ferrari or Bentley once she's married. RUN!

neoapocalypse:


freecocoa I know you're a good girl but can you honestly say the same for other ladies , I believe you have the heart to share with your bf what is yours and wouldn't mind even getting a car for your bf if you have. The thing is most ladies out there don't have that magnanimity , the poster who elicited this thread wouldn't think about sharing with a bf if she has. The mentality out there amongst ladies is if he can't spend on me no coochie for him

Unless you live in Aso Rock, it's the other way round.. Mostly women needing financial assistance than men in Naija relationships!

adconline:

Unless you live in Aso Rock, it's the other way round.. Mostly women needing financial assistance than men in Naija relationships!

And why is it like that , most men , even the bachelors have more financial obligations than ladies yet they are the ones needing more financial assistance