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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / The Burial(Fears and Fierce) (20196 Views)
HARMATTAN (A Poem On Our Current Fierce Weather) / An Open Letter To Fembleez1 Author Of The Burial (fears &fierce) / List Of Phobias---- The Fears Glossary (2) (3) (4)
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Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 12:32am On Jan 29, 2015 |
I hope I have not digress much from the storyline and the story still has life in it? |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 12:34am On Jan 29, 2015 |
Though I have not delivered this story the way I planned it ,I hope it makes sense |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Oyinprince(m): 6:52am On Jan 29, 2015 |
Good work bro Love the suspense, I'm suspecting that Baba to be the one playing pranks. 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by ODUMAIYE(f): 7:05am On Jan 29, 2015 |
Thanks for the update |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by stuff46(m): 2:27pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Dyoungstar: 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 8:32pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Oyinprince: Thanks boss Seems so,let's wait and see! |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 8:38pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Missmossy(f): 8:55pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Ghen-ghen now its getting more juicier,welldone Fembleez1. 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 8:55pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
With the latest development,I might have to suspend this story because it might be my story next to be plagiarized. NL writers are on strike |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 8:58pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Missmossy: Lol,thanks dear but it is so sad NL writers are on strike |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Missmossy(f): 9:04pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Fembleez1:I understand perfectly am in full support! Its high time those plagiarists get stiff penalties 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 9:38pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
Missmossy: Thanks for understanding dear |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 9:39pm On Jan 29, 2015 |
I hope you all understand too |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by kingphilip(m): 6:46am On Jan 30, 2015 |
Fembleez1:we all do understand and are in total support of d strike well u r writing well and I think u are still in line with the story line 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 1:07am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Thanks so much kingphilip(m) I'm humble boss. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 1:09am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Kingphilip(m),mind adding me to the whatsapp group?. My number is 08189811807. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 1:18am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Hi Readers, Just noticed some modifications on this thread,specifically on Literature Section. You can't quote someone else's post to reply them again. You can't copy or paste again. Might be what Seun and his Mods are trying to use as 'a' protective measure/s against plagiarist. Would inform you all,once I get to know it is now safe to proceed on the story. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Oyinprince(m): 6:22am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Hi Readers, Just noticed some modifications on this thread,specifically on Literature Section. You can't quote someone else's post to reply them again. You can't copy or paste again. Might be what Seun and his Mods are trying to use as 'a' protective measure/s against plagiarist. Would inform you all,once I get to know it is now safe to proceed on the story. ...Can still copy ^^ 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 11:28am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Oyinprince(m),....are you serious? But it is not displaying 'copy' on my menu. Mods ,please what do you have to say? |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 11:29am On Jan 31, 2015 |
Stuff46 ,what do you think? |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by stuff46(m): 2:20pm On Jan 31, 2015 |
I refuse to comment on that to avoid getting banned. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 7:03pm On Jan 31, 2015 |
Funny you |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 10:28pm On Jan 31, 2015 |
KingzPen(m) ,I'm most humble to see you viewing my story boss |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 10:54pm On Jan 31, 2015 |
I shall continue this story tomorrow readers. They can steal our stories but not the brain and proof of ownership. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by KingzPen(m): 7:19am On Feb 01, 2015 |
So enjoying this story... Keep the flag flying Boss... 1 Like |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 9:47am On Feb 01, 2015 |
Thanks KingzPen,.......I'm most humble boss |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 10:06am On Feb 01, 2015 |
I want to use this opportunity to inform you all that,the reason I haven't request for corrections/criticisms or invited people to this story is not because I think I am flawless or do not make mistakes. The reason is because I had thought people would not like the story and being my first story,it might seem dull. That's why I have not asked for corrections/criticisms or invited other great NL writers to this story. Dopeyomi does understand cause I told him before I started the story I won't invite people to the thread,not because I am feeling pompous but I just felt it might be a dull story and inviting great writers might seem disastrous. I want to see the crowd or readers I can pull before commencing fully like other NL writers. I have been going through the story from the first page and have seen many errors myself,punctuations/grammar blunders and irrelevant sentence structures,'paragraphing',Capitalisation and the rest and I know you all might have noticed these too. I want you all to know that,am still a 'very' young writer and willing to learn both from my readers and other NL writers as well. I promise my timidity would change as I start learning to request your corrections/criticisms sooner rather than later. Thank you all for gracing my first story. I am humble. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Tobilastik(m): 6:54pm On Feb 01, 2015 |
you can no more quote but someone can still copy ... |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 6:55pm On Feb 01, 2015 |
Updates dropping soon. Typing,...... |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 7:07pm On Feb 01, 2015 |
Yap Tobilastik(m) ,that's what my name sake MR Oluwaseun and his Mods did but we hope they find a solution to it soon. |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 7:46pm On Feb 01, 2015 |
It was a wednesday morning. The day many people had anticipated. Though it wasn't the day for the Mass of the Dead(requiem mass) but it was the day many yoruba's would say, 'we look and examine this day to know how tomorrow would turn out to be', either it presents an 'hopeful hope' or a 'hopeless hope'. It was the day mama's wake-keep service took hold. I might have seen so many dull wednesdays than it but it stood out to be one a gloomy wednesday have ever seen in my life. I never knew it would turn out to be a great adventure because I didn't wake up happy. The previous night had been stressful, going to hire cooking pots, buy firewood and stuff. Though it was supposed to be the day I had anticipated like other's whose intentions were to come eat buns, puff puff and drink tapioca or tea but I wasn't just myself. The early morning sun didn't show up nor did the sky indicated it would be a bright day, everything around me just seem to be painted fades of colours. I was very lazy but I managed to do my chores, relaxed for some minutes before heading into the bathroom to have my bath. I brushed my teeth, ironed the clothes I planned putting on to the wake-keep. Food wasn't ready so I strolled a little down the street. A mind was telling me to go to my cousins' but the hunger couldn't allow me wander that far. I had to turn back immediately I thought about it. I got back, had my food served. It was rice and bean. I had it filled to the brim and even told my 'step ma' I would come collect more once I finish devouring the 'mount' she mounded in the plate for me. I finished the first round and went for the second which she had thought I was joking about. After I finished with the second, I was satisfied. A ittle too filled to move but I managed to get up though sluggishly to wash the dishes. On finishing everything I was doing, I checked the time to know how much was left for us to start moving to Agege for the wake-keep ceremony. The time was still fresh, at about 10:38am. It was then papa called me. I knew he would not go to the wake-keep with us cause he was 'strong' but he always wanted to make sure everything was well set for us. "Here I am sir!." I said "Go and look for Mr. Gbenro. Hope he hasn't forgotten he is taking you to the wake-keep today?. When you finish seeing him, go check Ms. Kehinde and ask what her plan is on going for the wake-keep." Papa said as I left his presence to go search for Mr. Gbenro. It took some time before I was able to locate him, for he had gone to work as a mechanic elsewhere. As a man who needed money, 'every way was a way' for him. I told him he was going to take us to the wake-keep. He asked how many of us would be going, which I told him 5. He asked that I mentioned them. "Ms. Kehinde probably, myself, papa's third born and last born." I listed it to him using my fingers to count. "Well, I don't think the car would contain you all. Ms. Kehinde and Aunty Josephine(papa's third born) are chubby." He said laughing. "We would manage it and if it comes to the worst, I might not be going." I blurted out leaving his presence so I could go to Ms. Kehinde's house as papa asked but, Mr. Gbenro ran up to me and said. "Tell papa the petrol won't be enough and we will have to gauge the four(4) tyres." "Ok Sir, moti gbo(I've heard you), I will inform him." I went straight to Ms. Kehinde's house, asked what her plan was but she said she doesn't have any plan. She doesn't even know may be she would go. "Just inform papa I would be going if Mrs. Josephine is going as well." She said as I left her presence. I had expected she would say she was not interested going or she would meet us there but she vexed me when she said she would be going if my Aunt wass going. I wasn't amused when Mr. Gbenro made a joke about her weight or size, not because I was still an angry man cause of hunger. I never liked her and would have laughed but to me, what he said didn't even tickle my sensation. Saying she would be going made everything worst. If she had read my facial expression, she would have noticed my disapproval. I got back home and met Mr. Gbenro in papa's office already explaining to him what he had told me. I told papa what Ms. Kehinde said and he said "Ok, I will call Josephine now. Call me Jacinta(his last born)." I called him Jacinta. He spoke on the phone to Aunt Josephine and she said she was already on her way to our house. Papa asked may be Jacinta would be going and she said yes, she would. I was relieved cause I wouldn't be going there with Ms. Kehinde alone of whom I have not been on talking terms with. It was just because Papa had sent me to her, that was why I spoke to her or even went to her house. As Mr. Gbenro collected money to go gauge the tyres and get fuel for our journey, I thought may be I should follow him in the car so we could branch any Eatery, so I could get Chicken Pie of which my taste bud was savouring but I quickly suspended the thought. Just a bit stressful work was trying to turn me into a glutton. I wanted to conserve strength for the journey and wake-keep so I went back into to the room to take a nap till the time they would wake me when they were ready to leave. ******************************************** |
Re: The Burial(Fears and Fierce) by Fembleez1(m): 8:28pm On Feb 01, 2015 |
On the other hand, the General was rose up by Amy from bed at exactly 8:30. She had prepared his meal, then went on to have her bath. When she proceeded to wake him up after the bath, the General first opened his eyes lightly and close them back immediately he knew it wasn't time yet to leave for the wake-keep. He had been through a lot the past few days and needed to rest but Amy wouldn't let him. She tried to wake him again and he said "Oh!. Woman, what is it this morning na?. Won't you let me sleep?." "I just want to tell you, your food is ready!." That's all she said and went out. The General rose up and went into the bathroom to have his bath, brushed his teeth and dress up. He didn't come out immediately he finished all he did to 'freshen up', to eat his breakfast, he just laid on the bed until Amy came in to check on him again and asked may be he wants the food to get cold. He was fed up by her constant disturbance and knew if he doesn't go have his breakfast, she would not let him be so he stood up and went to the dinning, after which Amy joined him. He poured some milk(liquid in tin) into the porridge(oats) she had prepared and mixed it till it was well tuned. He lifted a spoon into his mouth as Amy spoke. "I will be following you down to the wake-keep this evening." She said with all seriousness. "What for?. Did they ask you to come with me?. Woman!. I don't think it would be necessary." The General said frankly, trying to concentrate on his porridge. "It is not compulsory it is necessary. All I know is, I will follow you to the wake-keep." She left the dinning soon as she replied him to show she couldn't care what he feels or say, they would be going together!. He wanted to stand up, to show his authority over her, to say something but the porridge choked him. He coughed a little trying to relax and drank a glass of water afterwards. He looked towards the entrance of the kitchen she had taken and shook his head, he had nothing to say. Though he is the head of the house, he still make sure she airs her views and have her way some times, not because she is an iron lady or trying to dominate him but he felt there should be shared respect for each other's view no matter the gender. Suppression would be detrimental to his family life, if he had planned using it as were used in the military junta. He stood up afterwards and headed straight towards the garage to check may be his car had been cleaned and checked for any unforeseen faults that may arise when driving it. Everything was done and they had to wait till it was time to start leaving, since there would be congestion on the way, they had planned to leave home early. The time went by, it was 3:23pm. The General called out to his girlfriend(WF- Woman Friend as you would have it) ,that he was ready to leave. He didn't get a reply. He called out again but got no reply and he thought she might have slept off. He didn't bother to go check her because he knew that 'mid-afternoon' was always the time she took her nap. He felt glorious and walked stealthily out of the living-room. When he got into the garage and saw she(Amy) was already in the car waiting for him. He felt beaten, he was sad and couldn't imagine the surprise if she had meant it that way. He wanted to turn back but it was impossible. They had told him to come to the wake-keep if he wants to see his son again so he had to overlook Amy. He opened the car, started the engine and drove off, en route to Agege. ******************************************** |
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