Given the op's response to some posters here, there's no doubt that she is a very intelligent and decent girl to an extent.
But I'm not yet fooled by those response as I find most of them to be very condescending. Eg. When she was asked about her definition of decent Igbo man, she immediately referred the person to dictionary knowing full well that decent in this context is relative.
Other questions that required a comprehensive reply was waved away with answers like "noted, thanks for dropping by etc"

Truth of the matter is that MOST Lagos born and brought up girls and even boys have a serious issue of identity crisis as a result of the following:

1. They grew up in a more Yoruba influenced environment with an Igbo family background.

2. They are often mocked in schools and their neighborhoods for being Igbo. Sometimes out of jealousy and other times out of ignorance. But they don't know.

3. They are applauded and assimilated into Yoruba groups if they speak and behave Yorubaish but ostracized if they speak and behave Igboish. As a Lagos brought up, Amadioha help you if you have an Igbo accent.

The real confusion and identity crisis begins when in their adulthood, after they've done all their best to be Yoruba only to be reminded that they are Omo-ibo by their trusted friends and even prospective mother in-laws. That's when it dawns on them to identity with their own. Funny enough, it sometimes gets worst as their so called kinsmen (Igbos) find it hard to accept them as their own cos of their mix and weird orientation.

This analysis is vise versa, though predominant in most Igbo born and bred Lagosians.

If the op can't get herself to date and marry non Igbo she has known all her life, then she should begin to see and behave like an Igbo first before seeing herself as a Lagosian. A Yoruba or Hausa girl who has never travelled out of Aba where she was born and bread can go back to Ibadan or Kafanchan and conveniently adapt (date, marry, interact etc) without anybody noticing.

Bottom line is; whether its too late for you to understand certain orientation about the Igbos or not, it just does not matter that much for most Igbo folks so far you are not condescending.

chiggiee:
my name is gozie, i am female and i am from Anambra state. I have been in Lagos almost all my life; schooled in lagos, served in lagos and currently working in Lagos.
meeting a decent igbo guy in Lagos has been a herculean's task since my university days, i have mostly had guys from other tribes flock around me and i am really not looking to settle down with a non-igbo guy(and please it has nothing to do with being tribalistic because the ratio of my non-igbo friends to the igbo ones is like 80:20).
so i would really like to know why it is difficult, cos i know Lagos is more populated with igbo people. so is it my location? or maybe i don't go out often? or maybe it is not the right time?

please feel free to drop your comments.

p.S. should in case a decent igbo guy(residing in Lagos) stumbles upon this post, i am just a mail away: chigiee@yahoo.com

Its all in ur head. U attract d kinda guy u want. Wat u wish for cums to u. Law of attraction.

3cycle:

Just say you're looking for the educated ones.
Visit any fidelity or diamond bank closeby most customers and bankers are "decent" igbo guys.
Where is lagatusglaber? He will help find igbo guys for you.

Present . What t is the description of the man in question

LegatusGlaber:


Present . What t is the description of the man in question

You came late
The Nwa was searching for a decent igbo guy in Lagos. Are you available?
Biko do the needful

3cycle:

You came late
The Nwa was searching for a decent igbo guy in Lagos. Are you available?
Biko do the needful

Good as I came late sha

My groom price has been paid, but it can be reversed under certain condition sha


for instance



If the Op's name is 3cycle

Nuzo1:
Given the op's response to some posters here, there's no doubt that she is a very intelligent and decent girl to an extent.
But I'm not yet fooled by those response as I find most of them to be very condescending. Eg. When she was asked about her definition of decent Igbo man, she immediately referred the person to dictionary knowing full well that decent in this context is relative.
Other questions that required a comprehensive reply was waved away with answers like "noted, thanks for dropping by etc"

Truth of the matter is that MOST Lagos born and brought up girls and even boys have a serious issue of identity crisis as a result of the following:

1. They grew up in a more Yoruba influenced environment with an Igbo family background.

2. They are often mocked in schools and their neighborhoods for being Igbo. Sometimes out of jealousy and other times out of ignorance. But they don't know.

3. They are applauded and assimilated into Yoruba groups if they speak and behave Yorubaish but ostracized if they speak and behave Igboish. As a Lagos brought up, Amadioha help you if you have an Igbo accent.

The real confusion and identity crisis begins when in their adulthood, after they've done all their best to be Yoruba only to be reminded that they are Omo-ibo by their trusted friends and even prospective mother in-laws. That's when it dawns on them to identity with their own. Funny enough, it sometimes gets worst as their so called kinsmen (Igbos) find it hard to accept them as their own cos of their mix and weird orientation.

This analysis is vise versa, though predominant in most Igbo born and bred Lagosians.

If the op can't get herself to date and marry non Igbo she has known all her life, then she should begin to see and behave like an Igbo first before seeing herself as a Lagosian. A Yoruba or Hausa girl who has never travelled out of Aba where she was born and bread can go back to Ibadan or Kafanchan and conveniently adapt (date, marry, interact etc) without anybody noticing.

Bottom line is; whether its too late for you to understand certain orientation about the Igbos or not, it just does not matter that much for most Igbo folks so far you are not condescending.

thanks for your post and know that your comments have been noted. I am not one who likes to talk alot; there are some battles that are not worth fighting, hence my brief response to some questions/comments on this thread. I put forward a criteria of the kind of person i was looking for and it was that simple because i am not complicated and i find it disdainful when people who don't know me try to complicate things , like interpreting the word "decent" out of context. I am far from condescending dear, but that is your opinion and you are entitled to it everyone is

Nuzo1:
Given the op's response to some posters here, there's no doubt that she is a very intelligent and decent girl to an extent.
But I'm not yet fooled by those response as I find most of them to be very condescending. Eg. When she was asked about her definition of decent Igbo man, she immediately referred the person to dictionary knowing full well that decent in this context is relative.
Other questions that required a comprehensive reply was waved away with answers like "noted, thanks for dropping by etc"

Truth of the matter is that MOST Lagos born and brought up girls and even boys have a serious issue of identity crisis as a result of the following:

1. They grew up in a more Yoruba influenced environment with an Igbo family background.

2. They are often mocked in schools and their neighborhoods for being Igbo. Sometimes out of jealousy and other times out of ignorance. But they don't know.

3. They are applauded and assimilated into Yoruba groups if they speak and behave Yorubaish but ostracized if they speak and behave Igboish. As a Lagos brought up, Amadioha help you if you have an Igbo accent.

The real confusion and identity crisis begins when in their adulthood, after they've done all their best to be Yoruba only to be reminded that they are Omo-ibo by their trusted friends and even prospective mother in-laws. That's when it dawns on them to identity with their own. Funny enough, it sometimes gets worst as their so called kinsmen (Igbos) find it hard to accept them as their own cos of their mix and weird orientation.

This analysis is vise versa, though predominant in most Igbo born and bred Lagosians.

If the op can't get herself to date and marry non Igbo she has known all her life, then she should begin to see and behave like an Igbo first before seeing herself as a Lagosian. A Yoruba or Hausa girl who has never travelled out of Aba where she was born and bread can go back to Ibadan or Kafanchan and conveniently adapt (date, marry, interact etc) without anybody noticing.

Bottom line is; whether its too late for you to understand certain orientation about the Igbos or not, it just does not matter that much for most Igbo folks so far you are not condescending.

Brilliant summary of the OPs predicament.

Are u by chance a psychologist cos dis your analysis is deep.

chiggiee:


that is the idea my dear, to look back at this post in the future and smile.
ve really enjoyed your contributions and that of others here, it has made me take a step back and check myself for the things i may not be doing right.

My Dear,I guess by now your inbox must have been flooded with proposals from different ends of the earth.Goodluck
...And congrats on getting such responses without even hitting front page.

Stumbled on this thread, but no offense to you OP, I think your generalization is wrong. Lagos is a massive place, sometimes I don't see people I know that live elsewhere in a long time, it still doesn't change the fact they are my friends and decent people, especially igbos.

You need to hang out more or change your location is you can't find them, or better still call me and I might help....07066596994

U never get the right person u always in bad side I too an igbo guy I never get the right Igbo lady the one that I seen is fake

trust me, some igbo business men are more polished than the educated ones; i know this because my sister married one and you would never tell that he didnt further his studies.

so it is really not about the guy's educational background.

Gozie the man that will marry you is already around the corner. Infact start rejoicing. You may have met him and not realize ,you may also have not met him. He may not even be in lagos