Wow, are people really justifying his dad slapping his mother

I read some people saying stuff like well you didn't know what she did etc.... I can't even believe that anyone can say a woman should be slapped by her husband for any reason whatsoever.

OP In a sane country you are old enough o be on your own and would probably be living on your own from University so my advice is if you can move out do so and focus on your future. Do not destroy anything in revenge as that can lead to other issues. Move on with dignity and maturity and he will regret his actions.

One last advice whenever you get married please please please there is NO situation that warrants you beating your wife. No situation ever. Marriage should be 2 people coming together with respect, trust and love but as usual with everything Nigeria it is different.

Saw a thread the other day where a woman complained her husband had his brother as next of kin and people were supporting it. In my opinion why stay married then if you cannot trust your wife?

udz:
U are in ur late 20's, then ur Dad FUCKD UP. He doesnt have respect for U yet. try and earn ur respect not by fighting him. Give him a good dose of silent treatment, move out frm his cmfort zone. Bet me, in just 2 months, he will start complaining to every dick and harry to call U and ask why? He wouldnt want to come out open and beg U. Guy am talking from experience.

Exactly what I wanted to say!
he has no respect for you yet!
silence treatment is the best!
And when you pack out, be very very focus on your success because your siblings will be looking at you directly!
be very prayerful too because as soon as you take this step, enough MOUTH will OPEN to laugh you when you don't meet up!

in alapomeji's voice****Whats good for the goose is good for the gandal

SuperSuave:
First of all OP how old are you? Is this the first time your pman is slapping your mum? Did you even ask mom what happened before confronting dad?

everyone seems to be blaming the op irrespective of whatever thing that happened how on earth will d man slap his wife of close to 60years .This re d things dat cause trauma in children,I guess in my case I have total disdain for my popsy and even regretting y I didn't confront popsy wen he use to beat mumsi wen I was still little.....Yes!I took sides with my mother don't ask me y

Lumpyy:

Yes o,VERY WRONG,hes stronger than her for one and am sure a good dad will never disrespect his kids by slapping a lady!

I rest my case, I sure will make a very bad lawyer

adahgold:
May my mum soul rest in peace,if my mum was alive and this happen I swear I will beat my father nothing fit stop am,some people they talk rubbish for this place no matter wat my mum did at that age beating is not the answer,I expect him to deal issues with wisdom. Forget swear if him swear my mama go bless me,someone here say if u do it (i mean beat your father)ur child will do they same forget that thing if you no beat ur wife ur son will not beat u period, love ma mum till now...

Guy, your head dey there. Some fathers can be very stupid. If you don't take it drastic with them they will not learn any lesson. Who dey talk about swear, when your papa need correct beating make him heaf correct. If e no do anything wrong and u beat am na then him swear go work. But for that kind situation, even if u no fit beat am, show your displeasure strongly! Why e go dey beat my mama is he mad. I dont care if they already know how they settle their wahala, what if he slaps her and she's dies in the process? I dont just want to see any nonsense from my dad towards my mum. I can't take it!

Omofairy:
It's funny how ppl who have never been victims of domestic violence come on social media and spew trash like “your mum must have done sth to deserve dat slap” “why would you try to defend her” and other nonsense.

Mr, you were right to try and defend her, it's a consolation to your poor mother that at least someone stood up for her.

My dad is a wife beater too, can't count the number of beatings I have taken for my mom cos I always jump in and take the beatings instead (mumsy is over 50 and I want her to reap the fruit of her labour).

Silent treatment works when dealing with beastly fathers. Treat him as you would an older acquaintance and not a father. When you can, move out, but not before letting him know his behaviour made you lose respect for him.


Above all, try not to replicate his behaviour. It's so easy. You hardly see it coming

Wow, so sorry dear, God will reward you for all you are doing for ur mum, it is well

First and foremost let me congratulate u for standing up for ur mom
I can assure u she appreciated what u did on her behalf.
As for ur dad, yes he slapped u, but its now dawned on him that his abusive authoritarian behaviours will not go unchallenged.
He will be careful next time.
Stand up for ur mum anytime he tries any rubbish. He will soon tire while u will be stronger.
Try as much as possible to be independent. God will bless ur hustle.
Then u will even have a bigger say.
The truth is most of this men are just bullies, who don't know when to stop.
When they are cautioned, they behave.
No woman, ur mother's age deserve such maltreatment.
They've gone through a lot. They should be allowed to live the rest of their years in peace.

freshdude99:

This ur advice na rubbish o! Tho I blame the op sha, bcz everyone here reigning insult on his own daddy as if they have got a better one at home. Well in as much as I don't know exactly what the woman did, the op sounded as if its d first tym such is happening. If that's the case, then the man don try not to have lost his cool for so many years of marriage. Maybe the woman is wrong here but that's not enough to justify the slap anyways but u will always agree with me that taming the excesses of a wife can be so difficult. That's my opinion tho

good for u

Some of you obviously have no love or respect for your Mothers and it's obvious some of the people commenting can also beat their wives. The day my Dad tried to hit my Mum, my older sister and brother who were just about 12 and 10 then brought out a mortar to threaten him in his life he never tried it again because that showed him he will have to kill all of us to touch her. What none sense OP get out of that house jare, the man is power drunk

That is the problem with Nigeria, everyone bullies whoever he has small power over , hissss

matoyeh:


Bros, Its very wrong for you to even confront your dad at the first place without knowing the cause of the slap... and mind you, you dont take side before conclusion! Was that the first time your dad would slap your mum?

u are very stupiD…… he is 100% right for confronting the cow.

Guy mind your own business,na when you marry,you go understand why your dad slap your mum

Freest, just calm down. Don't let it get to you. I know it is very painful for him to treat you like that especially because you were trying to settle things.

Console her. But I guess it's time for you to move out.

JeffreyJamez:


Mr Big man..... rant your own na

When a man is been fed, housed and cloth by his parents, their reasoning is always funny.

jasedu60:
When people marry prople they agreed and the consiquences of their decision os theirs, you are a 3rd party in your parent's marriage. Do you know how many times your Mum slaps your Dad? You walked in when she got served and you are prooving 21st century pikin, thunder fire the devil.

It seems you were drunk when you typed this trash!

GUY! U are fuckin up big time! Bliv me! I left the comfort of my home to start stayin n strugglin on my own @21 wen I graduated frm uni. I hustled legally and personally financed my masters programme with no help from my parents, Now @27, i am takin care of them. No father on earth will dare slap a son like me! NEVER! You need to wake up my guy! WAKE UP! I hate to see guys gettin close to 30 and still dnt knw wat to do wit their life! Your father will nt miss u if u leave his house, u wanna knw why? U'r supposed to hav left dat place 4 or 5years ago. U've become a very bad tenant to him. Go out there and face the world! Ur father has done his bit, go and do urs! Take dis comment of mine as a challenge today! Dnt be scared of ur environment! Go out! Go out! Stand up and fight! Listen to ''On Your Own'' by D'prince! to get inspired! Leave ur papa and mama alone.

OP. Beat him, burn down his house, burn his cars, sell all his land and make him a pauper.

That should serve as a good lesson never to beat your mum again and u should feel good about that right?

CRAP.

GROW UP YOUNG MAN. Think like a real man would and handle this like a real man would. And to give you a clue, what would have JESUS CHRIST have done if he were in your shoes?

Ponder that.

And remember, the overall goal should be long term peace and harmony. Any action that negates that goal is a no-no.

Personal analysis:

you do not confront friends, colleagues, your boss in the heat of anger when there is an issue and get a favourable response. Why would you assume that your dad would be any different?

You confronted him with anger on your mind. 4get what u typed above, ur body language and whole demeanor spoke volumes and I guess that warranted the slap from him.

Next time, if u can prevent any physical confrontation b4 it happens, without putting urself unnecessarily on the line, do that.

If it has happened, wait for him to kool down then talk( not confront) with respect. Allow him to talk and then express your displeasure in unmistakable terms(with respect). And also that you hope that he for your sake he tries to resolve things like this without violence then console your mum the best u can.

Lastly, never listen to advice from women when it comes to issues like this. I can read some crappy advice from some women and even some dudes r not fit to be called men asking u to beat ur dad,burn his papers and so on and so forth. Remember that talk is cheap. A lot of people here are immature and come from dysfunctional homes.

On a funny note: if u r contemplating touching any of ur dad's properties ,albeit without consequences, then u must think very little of your father. U no fit try that kind thing with my popsy. u will spend the rest of your life in prison until u replace everything. plus except u can beat up a navy platoon, u berra keep you hands to ur side. ENOF said.

idu1:
u are bast.ard

So it actually pained you ? Hahahaha next time learn to quote someone within your intelligence range. Fuckingretard.

Freest:

i didn't get him angry as he was angry before i even got there. I only went to appeal to him. by the way am more angrier and wanna move out today. But need to teach him a moral lesson before leaving hence d need for this advice

forget it son.

JeffreyJamez:
Na you make mistake na...... if I were you,the moment he slapped my mum,he had lost that respect and na as e dey hot I go yarn am scores.... if e do anyhow e sef go collect anyhow... what non-sense!!....

Anyways..... if he has a car,break windscreen and tear the tire..... and tell him you did it! For every slap your mom collects, damage one personal item of his that is precious to him...e go learn quick.

blood of God. This guy is from a broken home

udz:
U are in ur late 20's, then ur Dad FUCKD UP. He doesnt have respect for U yet. try and earn ur respect not by fighting him. Give him a good dose of silent treatment, move out frm his cmfort zone. Bet me, in just 2 months, he will start complaining to every dick and harry to call U and ask why? He wouldnt want to come out open and beg U. Guy am talking from experience.

poor advice

Freest:

Thanks Boss. Its good to hear from someone that has same experience. Maybe I'll just keep my calm. but staying, i don't think i can bear anymore. will just hv to move

if u move. What of ur mum. Ur dad may kill her o. Stay put and tidy up things as guy. Don't flee from responsibilities.

Buy a bottle of hot drink and beg your father. You don't threaten your dad. And besides, you received that slap because you questioned his authority while still under his roof. You must apologize to your dad first for telling him that he just lost a son, then u also ask your mum to reconcile with your dad.

They have seen worse situation; why did you interfer? You wanted to show your father that you are a man.

can't play the gentleman card all the time, if i was you i would have threatened to beat him up if he does not apologize.
Firstly no man strikes a woman and on top of that where does he get the audacity to slap a grown man.
well thats just me

Freest:

i didn't get him angry as he was angry before i even got there. I only went to appeal to him. by the way am more angrier and wanna move out today. But need to teach him a moral lesson before leaving hence d need for this advice

U see? what moral lesson could u possibly teach your dad?, now u should understand how it feels to be hurt.
seriously if u were to be your dad u will not only slaps but as well punch. u are the type that get angry too easily (I might be wrong though).
Next time u should allow your dad to get calmed before asking him any sort of question.

Hotstew:
You shd have endeavored to slap him back. By doing that, he will never forget you. Your foolishness knows no bounds.

no wonder u named urself hot stew

Freest:
It happened this morning oh, was bathing and prepping for work when i heard my dad at the top of his voice, before i knew it i heard mumsy crying, he had slapped her. Am in the same house( Haven't been able to move out yet) and i couldn't just bear my mum crying so i went to my dad to tell him what he did was not right. He is almost 60 and so is his wife, at that age you slap your wife i was trying to use the voice of reason as i was angry but kept my calm (Who wouldn't be angry seeing his/her mum cry?) before i could finish explaining and appealing to him i received from his left hand of righteousness a resounding slap... it got me confused as i didn't know what i did to deserve such. I didn't say anything harsh nor abusive. Am angry but didn't wanna return that slap nor say words I'll regret. I told him I'm moving out and he just lost a son, he replied that i wont be missed. I wanna do something he'll never forget, before i leave, please i need advice as it dented my personality even amongst my younger siblings and neighbors. I really am confused on what to do before moving out. Am so pissed now
pls sincere advice. thanks

i understand how you felt as i have been in that situation many times. But maturity demands that you control yourself and not act in anger. You must realise that this is your father's family and his wife first before she became your mother. You are a member of this family but not the driver nor the conductor. You major role when the quarrel should be to seperate them to avoid bodily harm. Your major actions should be on your mother , talk to her and talk to your father but in private maybe days later after he has cooled down after you have learnt from your mum,what really happened. My father always accuse me of taking my mothers side. Your major concern is for peace to reign ,forget about teaching your dad a lesson ,you will only pour more fuel to the fire. You can move out but be fully prepared for it not in haste because of this . Also pray for them because if a major issue happens in ur absense ,you also will be called upon

Jenams:
GUY! U are fuckin up big time! Bliv me! I left the comfort of my home to start stayin n strugglin on my own @21 wen I graduated frm uni. I hustled legally and personally financed my masters programme with no help from my parents, Now @27, i am takin care of them. No father on earth will dare slap a son like me! NEVER! You need to wake up my guy! WAKE UP! I hate to see guys gettin close to 30 and still dnt knw wat to do wit their life! Your father will nt miss u if u leave his house, u wanna knw why? U'r supposed to hav left dat place 4 or 5years ago. U've become a very bad tenant to him. Go out there and face the world! Ur father has done his bit, go and do urs! Take dis comment of mine as a challenge today! Dnt be scared of ur environment! Go out! Go out! Stand up and fight! Listen to ''On Your Own'' by D'prince! to get inspired! Leave ur papa and mama alone.

Nothing but the FACT. truth is a bitter pill that's hard to swallow.

chucky234:
immaturity and ignorance are no doubt a serious disease, you want to teach your dad a lesson under his roof abi.
Those two have live together for years before and after you were born and have been able to sort their differences without your interference, at 29 you don't know how to relate with your dad. The worst is you shamelessly seeking for advice on nairaland, how dumb can you get huh, you want to teach your dad a lesson why then didn't you summon the courage to return the slap.
Ewu Fulani.

abeg nor wundjure persin with laff.Wic one com bi Ewu Fulani? . On a serious note,the young man deserved the slap.Wonder why he didn't turn his right cheek and received the balance slap just to fulfiled the scripture.He obviously rushed in to confront the old man(he's not saying the truth,his popsie can't just slapped him just like that)Make he go ahead and carry him load waka go,who cares

OpeDwarroir:
Buy a bottle of hot drink and beg your father. You don't threaten your dad. And besides, you received that slap because you questioned his authority while still under his roof. You must apologize to your dad first for telling him that he just lost a son, then u also ask your mum to reconcile with your dad.

They have seen worse situation; why did you interfer? You wanted to show your father that you are a man.

Crap!Only a coward does that!

Freest:

i didn't get him angry as he was angry before i even got there. I only went to appeal to him. by the way am more angrier and wanna move out today. But need to teach him a moral lesson before leaving hence d need for this advice

slap him 5 times before you leave the house....since you have dis-fathered him and he has dis-soned you

Some reactions here confirms that a lot of guys here are either shemales or something is seriously wrong with their heads.
1, I lost respect for the poster when he said he told his father he has lost a son. For starters, parents have a lot of hold spiritual and physical over their children even when the kids are grown and you must REMEMBER that whatever you did to your father under whatever guise will always come back to you. Your own son will tell you exactly the same thing and confront you in anger.Mark my words!
2, Again the OP made the fatal error of thinking he was now mates with his father to confront him anyhow. Some extremely foolish boys of nowadays make such silly mistakes always taking sides with their mother against their fathers .They are children of perdition, who have absolutely no regard for their kind. The are quick to judge their fathers but very slow to extend the same ccourtsies to their mother. I love my mother to bits but will NEVER interrfer with her relationship with my lovely dad.
3, If I am slapped for whatever reason by my father, I will go away with shame not come here to think about how to plan revenge against a man that carried me in his organ for years before even meeting my mum.
4, A fathers curse can cripple OP for life and render his life totally useless.
5, I can bet that OP confronted his dad angrily and I am very sure that had it been the mum that slapped the dad, he would not have reacted the same way.
6, Finally If OP is wise he should get wine, go on his knees and beg his father to forgiveness and stop listening from advice from foolish women.