malachee:
Guy are you OK? Don't you know that after God is ur mother. Maybe is ur wife Dat is feeding u sha

I love my wife and has two young children with her but this whole issue has complicated things.
What should I do? Your candid advice and suggestions will be appreciated.

san316:

I agree with this dude. Compel your wife to apologise to your mum and let her promise never to allow what happened repeat itself. I think you gave your wife too much freedom to warrant her exchanging blows with your mum. You must spell it out for her to know that your mum is above her in terms of age and position. You can get another wife but not another mother.

So you have to be stern in addressing your wife instead of divorce.

JeffreyJamez:
My Dad didn't Talk to his mother and his siblings for 16yrs until she died and he wasn't even moved.... why?...she gave him same choice "your wife or me?" And knowing the kinda women his wife(my mum) and his mother were he gladly chose his wife over her and his siblings took the side of his mum....and why all this? simply because my mum called her a Witch to her face!!.... and when my Dad was Confronted you know what he told his mum "if you didn't act like a witch she wouldn't call you one ".

What's my point?..... why would your mum slap a grown married woman if she wasn't looking for trouble?.... better stick to your wife..... your mama time don pass.... After the Bible sef talk am.

cococandy:
What is the cause of the animosity between them?
Get to the root to solve the problem.

You know most of us Nigerians are superstitious.
I've heard people believe that one can use pictures to do juju for someone else.

What is your wife afraid of that she's not telling you?


Uncle you can't leave your wife for that reason.
Let her apologize to your mother for hitting her back and getting into a fight with her.
Na old woman she be o. What if she'd injured her seriously in the fight? Old people are fragile.
She could have tired to endure the slap and wait to tell you when you get back (easy to say I know).

As for your mom, when everything is settled you need to talk to her.
I know old people are revered, as such almost worshipped and can do no wrong in the eyes of traditional laws. Still she needs to be more peaceful. The pictures don't belong to her. Since she asked your wife and your wife said no, she should have waited until you got back to ask you instead of slapping your wife. Is your wife a riffraff that can be slapped anyhow? So annoying

She could have even asked you before you left since she knows she doesn't get along too well with your wife.

Those two ladies she brought to visit with her, why didn't they stop the fracas before you got there?
I'm suspecting them.

For her to slap her DIL in the presence of visitors means it has been decided that she has and deserves no respect in your house. Sad.

Pls set the boundaries in your home o.

I don't know why women won't let their sons have peace in their marriages.

Imoy:


Are u for real?

A good wife should have suggested printing a copy for her MIL instead of bluntly refusing her MIL to take it.

And No reason on dis life is justifiable for a wife to hit her MIL, no reason at all.

If na me, d love I get for my wife go reduce to 89%

TheFilmmaker:


If my wife loves me, she will not do that. Once she does that, I'm sure she's prepared to leave the house too.

Stop acting like pussies.

anitank:
Mother in-laws can be very wicked and controlling. As far as I'm concerned your wife can't be blamed at all, she must have been pushed too hard she couldn't take it any longer. What did your mother come to your house with her sister and friend to do? They came to start a fight! And they patiently waited for you to leave the house to initiate one. I'm glad she was strong enough to show them who the boss was

If your wife didn't respect you or your mother, she wouldn't have called you before the fight escalated, my opinion. Mother in-laws should learn to stop sticking their noses where they don't belong, not every wife cares about tradition.

If your mother cannot love and respect your wife after she's had two of her grandchildren, then she shouldn't expect same from her. She can't keep playing the perfect wife forever

iiichidodo:
Psychoanalyzing this, we can observe where the wuss gene sprung off from to warrant all these "my wife is my life my mother can go to hell" nonsense. Ofcourse you are your hen-pecked( woman wrapper) father's son.... A flaming bastard would have had bigger balls and manhood.

blesoh:

beautiful comment.my MIL takes permission b4 anyth.respect is reciprocal nt frm one side.
In another life i want to hv same MIL cos shez more than a mother to me.wen a mother hates ur wife she wont even see d good side of ur wife cos shez blinded by hatred.

onoja12:
i can see you come from the same line as the woman,but fact remains,any woman who doesn't respect her husbands parents but respect her own,can not be said to be a wife,rather a woman on a mission,and my people say that is just the beginning,if she gets away with that,she would set her eyes on bigger embarrassment. my mother can not kill me after all she left and raised me before the wife sew me that she wants to marry.so what can you say is your excuse for holding a picture of my family.the answer is simple trouble maker.

Now if you give your mother free hands in my house,how much more my own mother when am the head of the house,anyway you look at this the wife has brought out her true colors and it must be contained before it causes a bigger problem.

I would give you a story,true life.where i come from the first son of the house becomes king once his father passes on.so time back the king passed on and the elders traveled to go and inform the first son that his father has passed on and he should come and prepare to be crowned,when they got there,the tradition is that once people come you first offer them water to drink,then give them food pending when your husband can attend to them.but rather when they got to the eldest sons house,the wife asses them to be poor people therefore she kept them out for hours,after allowing them in she just walk away without greeting them because she heard they came from the village.to cut the long story short after a while the elders stood up and walked out of the house,they told her to inform her husband that they have seen his wife,then they went straight to the house of the second son,his wife immediately offered them water and food before the husband came and they told him that they as elders have agreed that he be made king rather than his elder brother.he was made king when the elder brother heard he wanted to start a fight,they asked him why he is just coming and didn't his wife tell him that they came to this house or didn't she deliver there message.let me stop there the idea is his lineage lost out and this is no story,they had to make the elder brother a third class king to keep the peace but under his younger brother.

Women who don't know the beginning of anything want to claim more knowledge then does who have been there before them would end up destroying there husbands

MadCow1:



I am indeed a woman wrapper, a mummy's boy and an all round lover of women. If that is what it means to be a wuss then I guess that is what I am.. No shame.

I am indeed a product of my father. His genes have served me well. He has been married for over 35 years and his model for his marriage has served him well.. I have been married for almost 3 years and I have not had any regrets about how I treat my wife. I laid down the law early on my wife and how she must be treated to my Parents and my siblings and they have all respected it and I have a happy home.

In the beginning, I had some very serious issues between my then fiancée and my mother and I stood by my fiancée and even told my mother that she was at liberty not to attend the wedding. The fact that I stood by her during those trying period has set the tone in my marriage. She knows that to me she is my lieutenant and that I would protect her from everyone including my siblings. Today, if my mother has any issues affecting my wife, she knows to bring it to me first and not go attack my wife. My sisters know where I place my wife and they also have learnt to respect her as such. Everybody is happy because the law has been laid down.

Now I expect no less from any man who would be marrying my sisters as well. If he knows that he would not hold her in the highest esteem, he should please go pick up a street girl or somebody who has no esteem to rubbish.

The size of a mans balls is not the measure of his manhood. A man is measured by how well he provides, protects and governs his home. His home being his wife and kids..

If you are not ready to be married, stay single..

babyosisi:


I was afraid common sense had left the forum till I read this
Thank you Lord



Still reading

MadCow1:


I am not a perfectionist like the OP, I am a realist.

His wife has not left him so there is no point assuming the worst. And just so you know mothers do abuse their kids and even abandon them so let's stop painting mothers to be saints. Secondly every mother is a wife as well (assuming she was married) so technically they are both equal in status.

Mother's should be forgiven I agree but that also means mothers are not above making mistakes.

In this case, his mother was wrong on all counts and the mature thing would be for her to apologise to his wife for coming into her home to cause such chaos.

You must understand that this is a matter of principle for me. My mother always advised me to never take sides with anyone Including her against my wife as that can cause bigger problems in my marriage than I can ever understand.

Any man who can't place his wife above his immediate family does not understand the sacred institution of marriage and has no business being married.

I would give you classic cases involving my own paternal grandma and my mum but this is not about me. But the one lesson I learnt from that case was that my Dad never sided with his mum and after the quarrel had stayed for so long, both women resolved their differences and became so close that my grandma would always go to my mum to get whatever she wanted from my dad.

If a man allows his mother to rule over his wife inside her home, then he shouldn't be surprised when his wife acts like a single woman because that is not how a man covers his wife.

NmaGOD44:
if u too love ur wife, u won't support ur mum slapping her for whatsoever reason......stupid customs dat will always require dat the wife do everything to make her man happy only for the husband to do exactly wat he likes.....rubbish

MadCow1:

[s]

I am indeed a woman wrapper, a mummy's boy and an all round lover of women. If that is what it means to be a wuss then I guess that is what I am.. No shame.

I am indeed a product of my father. His genes have served me well. He has been married for over 35 years and his model for his marriage has served him well.. I have been married for almost 3 years and I have not had any regrets about how I treat my wife. I laid down the law early on my wife and how she must be treated to my Parents and my siblings and they have all respected it and I have a happy home.

In the beginning, I had some very serious issues between my then fiancée and my mother and I stood by my fiancée and even told my mother that she was at liberty not to attend the wedding. The fact that I stood by her during those trying period has set the tone in my marriage. She knows that to me she is my lieutenant and that I would protect her from everyone including my siblings. Today, if my mother has any issues affecting my wife, she knows to bring it to me first and not go attack my wife. My sisters know where I place my wife and they also have learnt to respect her as such. Everybody is happy because the law has been laid down.

Now I expect no less from any man who would be marrying my sisters as well. If he knows that he would not hold her in the highest esteem, he should please go pick up a street girl or somebody who has no esteem to rubbish.
The size of a mans balls is not the measure of his manhood. A man is measured by how well he provides, protects and governs his home. His home being his wife and kids..

If you are not ready to be married, stay single.. [/s]

TheFilmmaker:


Also remember to ask her how she would feel if she was denied pictures of her grandchildren.

Also teach her not to run her mouth like a sloth.

julietchic:





u have said it all, some mother in law are wicked and like wise their daughter.oo

mine don't have any problem bt her duaghter is wicked she monitor the amount of food I eat( the food dat hubby bght ) she is married bt hardly stay in her husband house when ever they return and will not bring anything whie coming. this lady is lazy even to bath her only son is a big work to her talk more of cooking as I write dis nw she is still sleeping and will wake up monitoring me. I have ask to give me patience heart.

Vision4God:


Hhhmmmm so sweet and great.
God bles u blesoh.

NmaGOD44:
now don't be foolish....did u ever read where she was said to have ran her mouth like a sloth??....evils

iiichidodo:
Sob story of an irritant Woman prick...Better not infect the OP with your disease as his case is far more different and will need balls of steel to resolve.Else his life will be governed by mad women,a condition we observe you're very comfortable with.

iiichidodo:
Sob story of an irritant Woman prick...Better not infect the OP with your disease as his case is far more different and will need balls of steel to resolve.Else his life will be governed by mad women,a condition we observe you're very comfortable with.

NmaGOD44:
if u too love ur wife, u won't support ur mum slapping her for whatsoever reason......stupid customs dat will always require dat the wife do everything to make her man happy only for the husband to do exactly wat he likes.....rubbish

chimkaire:
...please, don't allow anyone work you up. Let him continue and hopefully act out same if faced with such.




Good to know there still exist sane men here...kudos @madcow1, Babyosisi and you too. Hope these will guide Op in making his decision.

NmaGOD44:
don't b a sadist pls......jerk

TheFilmmaker:


Ever asked yourself why you're still single?

Feminist.