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To Hit Or Not To Hit! - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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In A Relationship Is It Ok To Hit A Woman If…….? / "Lady Dumps Her Fiancé For Raising Up His Hand In Attempt To Hit Her" / Guy Talk: Whats The Craziest Thing You've Done Just To Hit The Punny? PICS +18 (2) (3) (4)

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Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Petra23(f): 5:58pm On Apr 23, 2015
HELL NO! Hitin your partner is so not right..it's either you take a walk if you can't take the shit any longer or settle the pee in a reasonable manner.

1 Like

Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nihilist: 6:00pm On Apr 23, 2015
Bahahaha believe me, there are some girls that need that monthly, weekly, and daily slap reset...scheduled like a well planned Disaster Recovery plan.

These girls act like they are posessed by several evil spirits at the same time, and only a well timed, expertly delivered ifoju(2 if you're feeling generous) can deliver them from their madness.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by vision2050: 6:01pm On Apr 23, 2015
80% of those that comment did not read the story, too long
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by aboyaji(m): 6:02pm On Apr 23, 2015
Mehn you are really funny grin grin

It was worth the reading
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Walemi1(m): 6:03pm On Apr 23, 2015
They are better options to scold rather than hitting.Sit her down and talk sense into her like a child.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by vision2050: 6:08pm On Apr 23, 2015
80% of those that comment did not read the story, too long.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Oblion(m): 6:11pm On Apr 23, 2015
Mehn.... I hate girls who smash things when angry, still cant forget when my own sis smashed my phone, the only thing i see carry was my sim and memory card, only God help her dat day say I no de my usual craze mood
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by SUCRE007: 6:12pm On Apr 23, 2015
This is hilarious and nice

OP

You made Mii laff loud

Ur head correct
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by kullozone(m): 6:13pm On Apr 23, 2015
haven't stuff like dis in a while...
those posts on the front page are wack!
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by kandiikane(m): 6:18pm On Apr 23, 2015
And this is what some chick on front page would call an intelligent conversation.


.....let me read jare
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by chachanga: 6:19pm On Apr 23, 2015
searching4lovee:
[size=28pt] undecided

OP, WHO DO YOU EXPECT TO READ THOSE SHITS YOU WROTE UP THERE [/size]



You, of course !

If you really wanna find that love your monicker claims u're so ardently searching for cool!!

So, get to class...
RUN TO SCHOOL & DON'T BE LATE grin
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nobody: 6:23pm On Apr 23, 2015
Nihilist:
Bahahaha believe me, there are some girls that need that monthly, weekly, and daily slap reset...scheduled like a well planned Disaster Recovery plan.

These girls act like they are posessed by several evil spirits at the same time, and only a well timed, expertly delivered ifoju(2 if you're feeling generous) can deliver them from their madness.


Oh mahn!! undecided
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by kandiikane(m): 6:25pm On Apr 23, 2015
naijainfogalery:
i am against men hitting women, i cant even hit my younger brother or a child stubborn anymore, talkless of hitting my woman.

This brings me back to the question, some woman cannot behave well if they've not been beaten. 7 years ago i went to visit an old class mate of mine, they stay in this face me i face you house. When i got there i saw this man mercilessly beating his wife and no one was seperating them. i expressed my anger and my friend told me to sit and watch , i was like i am going home he pleaded and he gave me a clue, he said in 30 mins time or less the couple will go inside and lock the door, the next thing is hot sexx, i didnt believe less than 15 mins that i got there. the couples actually did went inside and they had the greatest sexx ever. the woman wey chop beaten now now was busy shouting haa haa huum huum ride on , do me , eff me well, harder, keep it coming , you must kill me today,

I was dumbfounded then my friend told me you see why no one seperates them, he told me someone that abused the husband during their last fight was given the abuse of his life by the said wife after the man had finished some rounds of sexx with him.

Some women actually need this to go back to their default settings but this isnt a justification to abuse women

Tales by moonlight..Abeg joor
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nihilist: 6:28pm On Apr 23, 2015
standd:



Oh mahn!! undecided

Trust me, that factual statement comes from a place of deep experience
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Phatmyk(m): 6:36pm On Apr 23, 2015
Loool!,madt post op, memes killed it,Nize won.

1 Like

Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nobody: 6:41pm On Apr 23, 2015
Nihilist:


Trust me, that factual statement comes from a place of deep experience

It's strange to me though. Never experienced it, my parents, folks haven't either( at least none that I have seen). I dunno how people get to the stage where they start beating up themselves. If you can't deal in a relationship anymore, you walk.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by MayflowerB(f): 6:52pm On Apr 23, 2015
Op u just made my day with this write up....thank u
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by cizokun: 7:23pm On Apr 23, 2015
no its no sadok,its bad no mata wat happens
Donlino:
I was listening to some guys argue about this :
In an intense fight. With your Partner. In a Committed relationship. Is it Okay. To hit, or not to Hit.

This Argument tickled me silly because:
1) Of all issues to discuss (like How to achieve World Peace, What to do about Global warming, The Glory & beauty of Plantain & egg sauce etc.) these folk gave Preeminence to THAT issue.

2) Everything tickles me Silly (//?\\)

3) The Argument made me remember Teejay’s Relationship. You’ll understand why in a bit.



Back then in school, i had a rented apartment off Campus. In my Compound alone there were close to 7 other apartments (BQ inclusive), all being Occupied by Students. Different Calibres of Human Beings: Males, Females … Then Teejay & His Girlfriend.

The Reason why I know that in Love, the Answer to that “To hit Or Not to Hit” question is very Dynamic is because I, along with the other tenants, were witnesses for almost a Year to the Freak show that was Teejay’s Relationship.

The First time we had cause to be alarmed about the new couple that just moved in to the BQ was when we were all rudely awakened one Night by Screams and Sounds of Objects breaking. We Rushed out, barely dressed, thinking the Compound was under siege by Mutant Armed Robbers or something.

It was Not.

In front of the BQ, we found Teejay Kneeling down while his screaming Girlfriend was tugging at his tee shirt, half pulling him through the Gravel on his knees.

To Start with, Teejay was not a Small Man. You know Flo ryda? The Musician? That’s EXACTLY how Teejay’s Physique was. Beard and all. And his Girlfriend had the Stature of MoCheddar.

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/flo_rida_roxy5.jpg[/img]
Mo’ cheddah.. -___-

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/2802f01-mo-cheddah.jpg[/img]
Flo-rida cheesy

So we, the Tenants, could not understand how the feck this Scene was happening. I mean, with the Laws of Physics being the Laws of physics …

Apparently, the Girl was helping Teejay understand that he Simply Should not be seen holding hands with other girls in Public, we came to find out.

We separated the Fight. They calmed down. We all went back to sleep.

Little did we know That was the Most Domestic Squabble they would ever have. (That We knew of)

There was that one time we all came back from school and Discovered that Teejay had Padlocked the Central Compound Gate with HIS own Padlock and refused to allow us in because he suspected that his Babe was in their apartment with another man, and he was waiting for them to open the door.

She wasn’t. But Teejay had been abused for so long, he was starting to see things.

That’s when we started to realize maybe we ought to report happenings to the Landlord. We were coming to understand that Teejay and his Mate seemed to want us to waste our house rent money with their behaviour.

Or the Other time the babe burnt most of Teejay’s Clothing in a Mini-bonfire in the centre of the Compound.

Or the Countless Nights we’d hear Teejay’s Weeping floating through our windows on the wind.

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/crying-man2.jpg[/img]
Is it until she kills me?

Anyway, after having witnessed so many of these Nollywood-like incidences most of us became used to the dramatic couple’s incessant public linen washing, drying & ironing and we carried on life as usual.

Until the day Teejay asked his Girlfriend to Move Out.

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/images.jpg[/img]Ghen Ghen!!!!

We all had to Rush out again because we thought Either an Earthquake was Happening, Or a small Bomb had been Lobbed into our Compound without our Permission.

Broken Bottles Everywhere, The Babe had thrown Virtually all Teejay’s Electronics & Appliances outside their BQ.

The things we heard that day about the Screaming Couple from the Screaming Couple ehn?

They blamed each other for EVERYTHING. Their Bad Sex life, Teejay’s Carry overs, the Babe’s inability to gain admission to school, Teejay’s Addictions, the Babe’s family history, the fact Teejay had no Car, the babe’s inability to have an Orgasm … EVERYTHING.

After a long while of Throwing things in this version and Both their Voices were hoarse with Screaming, Teejay said something he Perhaps should not have said at the Moment.

“Pack Your Things And Go Or So help me God, I WILL SLAP YOU!”

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/uh-oh-baby-face.jpg[/img]
Shit is about to go down yo…

This was New to us all. Even to Teejay. The ensuing Silence was deafening as Observers and Fighters all individually tried to Process this unusual Twist in the now familiar Plot we were accustomed to.

Then Suddenly, as if her Batteries had just Recharged, the girl’s voice went into Chipmunk mode.

I imagined she screamed something that sounded like “EHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!!! SO YOU WANT TO SLAP ME ABI?” While clapping and going forward to grab Teejay by the neck.

We had never known Teejay to be Violent so What happened Next was so XQSP%GXZBYTPLQXYZ!!!! (//_\\)

KPAS!!!

The Slap landed Smack on the Middle of the Babe’s forehead even as she was screaming “SHEBI IT’S SLAP YOU WANT TO SLAP… YOU MUST SLAP THAT SLAP TODAY OR YOU’RE A BASTAR— “

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/grey.jpg[/img]
hehehe..hehe..he hit her..hehe.

The Silence Again was Overwhelming.

In that brief Period of that Second Silence Teejay surprised us all again and the Girl even More with a Second well timed Backhand that sounded like a terminal Punctuation.

KPOS!!!!

All of us Witnesses Gasped out a Collective “AAH!” …

The Babe, now seemingly slightly Crazed started laughing Softly.

Then She Promised Teejay he was going to Regret this incident.

[img]http://tscng.files./2012/06/funny-pictures-black-cat-dress-will-kill-you.jpg[/img]
…I’m not even joking yo.

Then Teejay screamed about how she could do nothing.

We Separated them at this Point and the Girl left the Compound promising death and Doom and Problems.

It was later that evening the Police Van Came. I learnt they Packed along some Observers too along with Teejay in the back of the Police Van en route the Station to explain their Versions of what they witnessed. :’)

Of course, yours Truly serves a Living God. I was not among those Unfortunate Observers as I was in school at the moment.

That was then. Learnt quite recently that Teejay and the Girl have now done their introductions and are getting married sometime this year.

You See?

So, the “To Hit Or Not To Hit” Question depends on the Relationship. But Generally, life (being life) does not Permit Males to Physically Treat the Bleep up(s) of Females. Unfair, you Guys say? They can Verbally beat you up, you Guys say? Well, learn how to Verbally fight Tai-Chi too & See if that don’t make a Difference. Just don’t Overdo it. So the Missus don’t go learning ACTUAL Tai-chi. ‘Cause if all you’ve got is your Verbal Attacks, & she Knows Tai-chi, She’s Gonn’ Bleep you Up.

Guys, if you enjoy being hit, by all means … Buy her a Whip even. But Do Not Hit a Lady. Please.

Unless She hits your Mother (First).

Or your Mother hit her and your Mom ain’t know she Knows Tai chi. And she Murks your Ma all over the Kitchen floor.

…Or you're Unless Teejay smiley

To God Be The Glory

SOURCE

cc: Ishilove, farano, Rocktation,lalasticlala
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by cococandy(f): 7:27pm On Apr 23, 2015
This writer mehn. Had me laughing my insides out. grin
How artistic.

@story, that teejay babe never see mad man that's why she's exhibiting her violence everywhere.

2 Likes

Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nobody: 7:47pm On Apr 23, 2015
Hilarious!! Refreshingly entertaining write up, OP. cheesy

On the other hand, I understand perfectly the premise of your right up.. if you're still seeking justification to hit a woman, the answer is still no angry.

This scenario is very unusual, you even admitted it defied the laws of physics and biology sef. All the same sha, violence of any kind is despicable, whether from a man or woman. I hate quarrelsome people.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by hapiness44(f): 9:30pm On Apr 23, 2015
Nice write up, wonder why people dd not find it funny, I am actually laffing here.. We have many toxic relationships like that especially in school environment.I hope Teejay and his babe don't kill each other before they spend 1 year in marriage..that's a clear case of celine's 'I love you and I hate you'....

1 Like

Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by StunnazJay(m): 10:09pm On Apr 23, 2015
In a situation like this, it would be very tempting to hit it.

But bros, the stage they started in was too early to carry such a responsibility as a relationship.

But for me right now, Haba! Getting into a word spar, or put offs, and/or reframings. Well its the way the started, for me now. Its a tentative No!

But if I had also entered into a relationship at the same age, I would have hit such a woman. In such a situation its so easy to hit. But once its done, you would have to live your whole life wishing you hadn't hit her.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nobody: 10:29pm On Apr 23, 2015
Funny
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by faithchubby93(f): 10:47pm On Apr 23, 2015
Wow what a story! Tears just keep running down my face....hilarious grin
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by deebrain(m): 11:16pm On Apr 23, 2015
Best thread so far....


Could not stop laughing.


To the question, i don't hit. I simply shove. Then use either the clothe-line, the Pedigree, the Sweet chin music or (personal favorite) the RKO.


It depends on distance and annoyance level at the time of offence.


Remember, never "Hit" (as in slap or punch) your woman.


Thanks.

1 Like

Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by aaidel(m): 12:12am On Apr 24, 2015
in this age of equality me and all my male generation will hit back any female that dares hit us simple as that if you want to be equal take the good with the bad even if it is my daughter that hits her man i will encourage him to hit her back violence is violence and should not be condoned but some females feel it is alright to hit guys just because they are female and the only way they will desist is if they realize that they will get hit back
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Nobody: 2:30am On Apr 24, 2015
stup¡d copy-pasta
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by berbajiday(m): 6:36am On Apr 24, 2015
Lmao, hilarious article jare, d memes killed it. Don't get why peeps r Hating on d article, it was dope to me.
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by chellsee: 7:51am On Apr 24, 2015
OhhhhMG!!!!!

This is fucking hilarious.

Truth is some peeps are masochistic.

PAIN IS LOVE [color=#770077][/color] grin grin grin
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by anasey(m): 9:17am On Apr 24, 2015
what's this??
Re: To Hit Or Not To Hit! by Gemc3(f): 9:51am On Apr 24, 2015
hahahhahaa! This is one lovely story. So they are finally ending up as man and wife? Good for them. I hope their fights have reduced.

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