How Do I Relate More With People??? - Romance - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / How Do I Relate More With People??? (3217 Views)
I Relate Better With Older Women Than Younger Women / Do Not Ever Fall In Love With people who show These Traits........never , Ever / Help I Have A Huge Problem Relating With People Esp Girls (2) (3) (4)
| How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 5:53pm On May 08, 2015 |
Pls I need your help urgently. I'm a law student now in 2nd year and relating with pple seem to be a problem for me. I don't know how to go about it. And I ave tried every means I can muster I it keeps getting back at me. my academic is OK. And to really say the truth there are so many pple(GIRLS) I like But communicating with them is a PROBLEM and also public speaking. I will just keep stammering, sweating and blacking out wen I'm about to talk to em. And I was been called DULL by a friend and he went to the extent of telling me to quit studying law. I know I can overcome this problem I just need a clue, ways in overcoming this problem |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by francizy(m): 5:54pm On May 08, 2015 |
 That he-goat of a person you call a friend is not your friend. How would he refer to you as a dull person and ask you to quit your course? Is he better than the God that created you? Mind you, one you call a friend will never insult you with instead of helping you work on your weaknesses. A true friend will encourage and advise you and not mock you. A true friend will tell you how to build something and not shout at you because you failed. Law is for everyone and same thing about other courses. You just have to work on yourself to be confident enough to interact with people and hence be able to speak confidently in public. It's not difficult. Here's my advise: - Make as many friends as possible and hangout more often. - If you have any close friends or relatives that you can interact with confidently, ask such person to help you while you practice presentation with him/her. Do not just wake up one day and present to the person, prepare as if you are doing your project defence or you're handling a court case. - Make female friends from social networks, chat them up and build so much confidence in yourself while interacting with her. Don't see her like your Head of department, see her as your siblings and discuss freely with her. Sometimes, it helps when a guy isn't too proud tho. I do let ladies know everything about me before I date them. Some guys will tell a lady their weakness in case he fumbles, they won't see it as an offence. A true/good lady will stand by you and help you work it out. You may also meet some that may mock you, but hey, life's a risk and full of ups and downs and we must always take up challenges. - Always ask that Nkechi/Yemi that you admire in your department for her notebook, ask her to put you through on some topics you fail to understand (this may not be the case but your mind is just focused on how to get her to be your friend), speak with her and don't fail to put her through in necessary areas she finds difficult. If it's possible, don't sit close to her during lectures or reading hours as this may distract you. But you can always go to her on free times. - Mind you, in whatever you do, don't get distracted or allow the fun take away the times you assign to your books. - Don't be a game freak or social network or movie freak. Although some movies can teach you a lot about how to interact with people and many other things. Just cat a bit more fun and hang out more. May not be with only females as you can decide to hang out with male colleagues. - Don't smoke that bullshiit those guys below me asked you to smoke. Be strong and be a man bro. I was once like you and if I could overtake being shy, then you can. 3 Likes |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 5:55pm On May 08, 2015 |
Start smoking weed |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by willyboss: 6:03pm On May 08, 2015 |
Start by talking more with ur friends |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 6:05pm On May 08, 2015 |
aknopic: I Know watchu need homes Here
|
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by ammyluv2002(f): 6:05pm On May 08, 2015 |
rogerdat:He's sincere |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 6:23pm On May 08, 2015 |
Op, one thing you have to understand is that you are an introvert and as an introvert you find it hard being around people and engaging in conversations especially when it's people you haven't met before. As an introvert you are more energized by being alone. You would rather think and watch than talk. But guess what, you are not alone. I am an introvert too and there are a lot of people out there like us.  The first thing you have to do is come to terms with your personality. Know that it's not a bad thing and be happy knowing that you have a distinctive personality that also has it's advantages. Read up books about introvertion. I would recommend "Quite" by Susan Cain. It would help you in understanding a lot about your personality. That being said I understand what you are going through and I would tell you, I have been I your shoes. I would advise you just try to spend a little more time around people. Introverts don't like talking in the public but if there is a conversation about something we are into, or something we like, I bet you we would itch to say something. So try socializing with people you share a thing or two with, or people with like passions. probably a book club/ reading group, a sports group, a musical group or just anything you re into. This would help in releasing those inhibitions a bit. It's not going to be easy but I bet you would get used to it. You could also spend time In public areas, like parks, you could learn a few social skills, gestures etc. This also helps. It's not inherent in introverts to thrive in this kind of environments so always know when to retreat to energize so you don't over work yourself. The world we live in could also be termed an "Extroverts world" and we introverts can only try to blend. I wish you all the best. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 6:27pm On May 08, 2015 |
Just be yourself mate... We are alike, people tends to like folks like you and they'll always respect you. In as much you aren't a green snake under the green grass o. LOL.... Don't force yourself to be an extrovert, it might bring about inferiority complex |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 6:34pm On May 08, 2015 |
ammyluv2002: I'm sincere too |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 8:48pm On May 08, 2015 |
Op, you being an introvert is already an upper hand to get girls your choice,first off, you being the type that lacks social life means you been seen as anti-social but to girls,you been perceived as a mystery man and so when you come around,they would always want to know what's bringing out this mystery man out of his shell,be witty with that attitude and be bold to hold down a conversation then you can get any girl,keep the anti-social up but sometimes wild out with your friends. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Emodeee: 8:49pm On May 08, 2015 |
missclasssy: no wonder u r always on nairaland 24/7. U lyk story sha, cn't u be brief. Dats another sign dat u r an introvert, they prefer writing to public speaking.  |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Tbase2: 9:19pm On May 08, 2015 |
guys do you think an introvert cant be a good a leader (question) sorry cound'nt put in the question mark sign am new to laptops  the question his open to the house |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Youngpo413: 6:34am On May 09, 2015 |
aknopic:You are not DULL,you are shy and an introvert,thats how you are naturally and nothing can change that...but due to your course of study,you really really need to socialize with people. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by BIBblacboy: 6:47am On May 09, 2015 |
lollllllll......bliv me op i was once through this.....just stop giving A FOCKK about wat will happen when u talk.....make more frnds dat are gals nd not dat yeye guy u call a frnd.....gracias |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 12:02pm On May 09, 2015 |
missclasssy:Thanks and I will love to read the book u recommend |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 12:11pm On May 09, 2015 |
My short but concise advice. You are the only one to take a vow and break your self from the shackles of severe introvercy, low self esteem, shyness. I rather say read missclasssy comment three times, write it out and recite it every morning. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 1:11am On May 10, 2015 |
cowleg:THANKS |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Burnnotice(m): 1:23am On May 10, 2015 |
rogerdat: |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by UniqueGem(m): 1:56am On May 10, 2015 |
missclasssy:Ma'am, i don't think its a case of being an introvert here, i read his ealier post on this same issue, he was more descriptive there. Its like a psychological thing, maybe EXTREME shyness. I'm an introvert and i know introverts are not scared of speaking up when they need some info. This is surely not a case of being introverted. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by UniqueGem(m): 1:57am On May 10, 2015 |
aknopic:Do you school in lagos? |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by TEAMTWACI: 3:04am On May 10, 2015 |
Keep calm and vote www.nairaland.com/twaci For Miss NL  www.nairaland.com/attachments/2388096_coollogocom5062531_gifdbb2fefbdd9e975d8678c04d0a1169c1 Vote beauty nd brain |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 9:35am On May 10, 2015 |
UniqueGem:pls I dont need to tell u my location. U can help by suggesting ways I can stop this |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by UniqueGem(m): 12:12pm On May 10, 2015 |
aknopic:And you think i need your location for my personal interest? Goodluck bro. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by adeadex2006(m): 1:54pm On May 10, 2015 |
gud day, am also suffering from the same problem. am shy and find it difficult to talk with people I don't no. I find it difficult to find a girl talk less of approaching them. while am in school I had girls as friends buh have never think of woo them. |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by richy5(m): 4:37pm On May 10, 2015 |
ammyluv2002:kush doesn't inspire every1 especially d introvert |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 4:46pm On May 11, 2015 |
adeadex2006: |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by gracile(f): 6:39pm On May 11, 2015 |
They've said it all, just my 2 cents.. go out more often, hang out with friends also be active on nairaland! Believe me, nairaland has taught me alot!! you could benefit too |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Nobody: 6:49pm On May 11, 2015 |
OP You are not an introvert o...No mind missclasssy |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 12:22am On May 12, 2015 |
 MR SEUN, MODERATORS PLS CN U INTERVENE. I AM SOO SO CONFUSED :- Cc.lalastica |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by aknopic: 7:15am On May 12, 2015 |
aknopic: |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by Eveezy(m): 7:47am On May 12, 2015 |
missclassy has said it all, but to add to what she said, I would say all u need is a boost of self confidence, identify something u good at, use what u good at as a selling point, if u are good in academics most people especially gals will come to meet u if they need help, if u good looking, u have to believe that u are good looking, and that everyone staring at u, which u feel that are saying something bad about u is actually admiring u, some introverts get high in order to feel loose, some smoke, and odaz drink, these are not natural ways but u would be surprised at how people will begin to appreciate u. I as a person, am an introvert, a cute one, I focused on only my studies, as a young teenager then, I would trip for so many ladies or wanna talk with some confident guys, but I couldn't cos I probably felt there might be rejection, laughing and all, but all I needed was a boost of confidence, a very good friend of mine, a female, an older frnd then who understood me, told me am a cute guy and so many gals would love to be wit me and that d next time a gal looks at me, I shouldn't shy away and turn my face but instead, I should look back at her and smile, I tried it, it felt awkward, I was almost giving up and all of a sudden d gal smiled and quickly turned her face, she was also shy, I started getting my confidence there knowing that those other people are just people like me, I surrounded myself wit ladies, then guys came around knowing that I have d females around me, and now am quite a confident person, still an introvert but well controlled, they call me "soft boy" I don't talk much, most people that don't know am an introvert think am forming, but my real fronds understands me, u should also know that as an introvert, there are always some specific people u really free with, talk with those people, never complain to your fellow guy, they would call u a pussy and other names, I have my experience from that aspect, so don't try it. a very close female frnd will do. if u don't have female frnds, be more free wit your guys, engage yourself in certain tinz dey do, attend social occasions even if it makes u feel somehow, u would eventually get to a point u would be free. its never easy for people like us, cause people would just expect d flow from us when we can't actually do that, no matter how slow it takes u, u just have to keep trying, don't expect to be wild overnite. some people say there is a cure for introverts like its a disease, well it is not a disease, it is nature and there is no cure, no mata how confident an introvert bçom, we are still who we are, we can only be better than wat we once were 3 Likes |
| Re: How Do I Relate More With People??? by sheDD(m): 5:59pm On Sep 25, 2019 |
willyboss:Start talking When most times, u don't even knw wot to type |
Mr Nairaland Six Packs Competition / I Think I'm Addicted To It / Big Ass Twerking Contest In USA Photos And Videos
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 74 |