nairation:
hmmmmm..

tough one... i know u cant just disrespect your mum after everything she has done...

so what is left for you to do is.. consult ur uncles or something..

let them talk to your mum and see her reasons...

All your mum is doin is what every mother does..Protect her child..but it doesnt mean she is always right though.

So. just consult ur uncles and let them talk to her...

italkpass:
"The lady that loves me" Do you love her too? Sounds like you don't love her that much, If you love her enough to marry her, then you'll understand that your happiness is all that matters not what an Imam or pastor tells your mother.

Ay92:
I actually have the same problem too and don't know what to do. My parents' over-dependence on these pastors really baffles me. If I leave this girl, she may even commit suicide because I'm like all she's got and she's also all I've got. But if I disobey my parents, won't I be sinning against God? And God forbid that I encounter a problem with her in the future, my parents will simply say they've warned me.

smsshola:


This is the dilemma am in...

MizMyColi:
Hi there Shola.
I can't sleep too. Though mine's because I drugged myself to sleep earlier (health reasons).


About your story, I can relate.
I can relate because I have an inkling what it means to live your life, subjected to prophecies and worth nots.

I'd like to know though?
Are you a Christian?
A firm God believer?

If you are, then I'd like a remind you, that while the supernatural and divine is as real as the air we breathe...

You have to begin to reconstruct your mind to believe that Life is what we make it.
It is not God's will for you to suffer calamity in marriage.
You have to be aware too, that not all spirits of prophecy work in tandem with God's.

The spirit in you gives you understanding Shola, of what is right, of what is wrong. Of what to do, of what not to do. Of who to marry and who not to marry.

If it gives you peace, why not consult with other Men of God? In the end, if they are true MOGs, you will find that they will say what you have been perceiving in your deepest feelings.

If your Mom has no issues with her, other than what Alfa or Pastor said, and you think you can overcome those, please carry on.

A life lived mostly in fear is equivalent to a non existent one.

On a flip side, has it occurred to you, someone might be playing on your mom's intelligence?
Because the moment he okays a particular girl to your mom, then that day, he or she would have lost a "good customer?"

My dear....all I wish you is clarity of intent and purpose.
May you never miss it.
Amen.

smsshola:
Please I need a mature advice am really confuse as u can c I can't sleep because of d problem am going tru Btw my finance and my mother. Read my story and give ur advice:

I was born in a family of 5 my two sis, my mum and my dad..lost my dad few yrs ago so all ds while it has bn tru d struggle of my mum wt pain and hard labor she was able to c me tru uni days..

Today am working wt one of d oil company and relatively doing well and ok, though still praying fo better height. Now my problem start wen I brought a lady home fo my marriage and my mum opposed to d affairs wt reason she won't say;I also came wt anoda lady nd she said there is no way cos she has gone for prayer and dey told her it won't work.

The bone of contention is d current lady am dating;a lady dt we both love our selves and to be truthful to u guys she loves me more dn I do fo her and am also ready to settle down wt her;but after introducing her to my mum she said she wl go nd pray abt our future together as Hus and wify;she came back saying our early days together wl b okay but at old age we won't b compatible nd dt many dangers wl emerge.

Nairalander's am so confuse dt i don't kno what to do this state of mine led mi to ask one of my colleague out wh she consented and we av started dating,she even introduce me to her mum and her family I took a dangerous step and tell my mum abt her after two days she called me dt she has prayed and dt my colleague is my real wife...According to her d imam or pastor confirmed we ar okay to marry.

This her statement throw me into disarray cos the real lady dt love me wt all her might is not taking things lightly she is not ready to believe my mum tale dt we are not meant fo each other:while my colleague dt I just try my luck on her is now d one my mother is saying she is my wife even though she is not from my tribe,but d first one is from our tribe.

Nairalanders help me, wish shu I go for?Shu I neglect my mum advice and marry d lady dt loves me so much or I Shu leave her and marry my colleague based on my mother advice? Pls help a confuse fellow.

smsshola:
Please I need a mature advice am really confuse as u can c I can't sleep because of d problem am going tru Btw my finance and my mother. Read my story and give ur advice:

I was born in a family of 5 my two sis, my mum and my dad..lost my dad few yrs ago so all ds while it has bn tru d struggle of my mum wt pain and hard labor she was able to c me tru uni days..

Today am working wt one of d oil company and relatively doing well and ok, though still praying fo better height. Now my problem start wen I brought a lady home fo my marriage and my mum opposed to d affairs wt reason she won't say;I also came wt anoda lady nd she said there is no way cos she has gone for prayer and dey told her it won't work.

The bone of contention is d current lady am dating;a lady dt we both love our selves and to be truthful to u guys she loves me more dn I do fo her and am also ready to settle down wt her;but after introducing her to my mum she said she wl go nd pray abt our future together as Hus and wify;she came back saying our early days together wl b okay but at old age we won't b compatible nd dt many dangers wl emerge.

Nairalander's am so confuse dt i don't kno what to do this state of mine led mi to ask one of my colleague out wh she consented and we av started dating,she even introduce me to her mum and her family I took a dangerous step and tell my mum abt her after two days she called me dt she has prayed and dt my colleague is my real wife...According to her d imam or pastor confirmed we ar okay to marry.

This her statement throw me into disarray cos the real lady dt love me wt all her might is not taking things lightly she is not ready to believe my mum tale dt we are not meant fo each other:while my colleague dt I just try my luck on her is now d one my mother is saying she is my wife even though she is not from my tribe,but d first one is from our tribe.

Nairalanders help me, wish shu I go for?Shu I neglect my mum advice and marry d lady dt loves me so much or I Shu leave her and marry my colleague based on my mother advice? Pls help a confuse fellow.

neutrotoba:
I believe happiness supercedes all other factors

If yhu wanna be happy, marry the one yhu love.

If ur mother wants ur happiness, she'd allow you to follow ur heart!!

I also believe prayers can change unfavorable conditions to favorable.

italkpass:
"The lady that loves me" Do you love her too? Sounds like you don't love her that much, If you love her enough to marry her, then you'll understand that your happiness is all that matters not what an Imam or pastor tells your mother.

JeffreyJamez:
*enters with 50litre keg *

Abeg where una see fuel take power this thread

smsshola:


Thanks so much I really appreciate and wish u a better health recovery. To your question am a Christian and attend RCCG nd there doctrine is ur family member must support especially ones mother so hw will I convince my mum to consent.

Thanks for the wishes my dear.

Your Mom is a human being and she can be reasoned with.
Employ whatever means that is necessary to get her to give you two a chance.
Even if it means subscribing to emotional blackmail..
Finally Bro, prayer. Just pray, tell God what you want. Command the good elements and spirits to take charge and work in your Favour.

All the best

MizMyColi:
Hi there Shola.
I can't sleep too. Though mine's because I drugged myself to sleep earlier (health reasons).


About your story, I can relate.
I can relate because I have an inkling what it means to live your life, subjected to prophecies and worth nots.

I'd like to know though?
Are you a Christian?
A firm God believer?

If you are, then I'd like a remind you, that while the supernatural and divine is as real as the air we breathe...

You have to begin to reconstruct your mind to believe that Life is what we make it.
It is not God's will for you to suffer calamity in marriage.
You have to be aware too, that not all spirits of prophecy work in tandem with God's.

The spirit in you gives you understanding Shola, of what is right, of what is wrong. Of what to do, of what not to do. Of who to marry and who not to marry.

If it gives you peace, why not consult with other Men of God? In the end, if they are true MOGs, you will find that they will say what you have been perceiving in your deepest feelings.

If your Mom has no issues with her, other than what Alfa or Pastor said, and you think you can overcome those, please carry on.

A life lived mostly in fear is equivalent to a non existent one.

On a flip side, has it occurred to you, someone might be playing on your mom's intelligence?
Because the moment he okays a particular girl to your mom, then that day, he or she would have lost a "good customer?"

My dear....all I wish you is clarity of intent and purpose.
May you never miss it.
Amen.

mrsmith11:
I would ve advice but immediately you said you cheated on your gf with your colleague then I lost the respect for you.
I think your problem is you

Tallesty1:
You got it wrong there. He has okayed someone already. If I were in the poster's situation I will forget marriage for now and get busy with other things because there's trouble already.

I hate building good things on bad foundation, already there's fear in his heart and fear is a dangerous weapon than can tear any stronghold.

If the op should marry this girl he loves, there's problem and there will always be problem. Humans are very fond of putting the blames for our misdeeds on something or somebody.

Should the girl misbehave tomorrow the op will say my mom warned me instead of looking for solution to the problem. Every little thing the girl does will remind him of his mom's warnings and that will make him to hate the girl with time.

If he should go ahead to marry the one her mom likes, there will be problem too because for every little mistake she makes, he will put the blame on his mom. He's likely to call her to tell her that the wife she chose for him is not good. All these will happen because his heart is not with her.


So my opinion is, op, leave marriage for now and study these two ladies well to know the one that her life styles suits him...........

Forget love, it blinds people just like religion, it doesn't allow one to notice the intolerable flaws of their partner so Bleep it for the moment and use your brain to discern which is which.


Ogwu ka oham n'onu

suzzy16:
lol,ehn,nija don turn into another thing

JeffreyJamez:

Nne the hustle is real o