tearoses:


Keep it up
You may not be popular now with the "happening peeps" but it will pay off in the end and you can hold your head high.

As regards your second sentence. Both parties should be open to each other.

It should not be about philosophy. If a young lady wants to marry a Virgin man, she has a right to ask and the man should tell the truth. Women have choices on who to marry; I didn't accept to marry the first few guys that wanted me until I met the person I wanted too. It's a personal choice. So if a man wants to marry a girl who has never aborted, don't judge him. Just walk away if you have had two abortions , no need to lie you are a Virgin

tearoses:


Keep it up
You may not be popular now with the "happening peeps" but it will pay off in the end and you can hold your head high.

As regards your second sentence. Both parties should be open to each other.

nagode dear.

.

As much as I tried restraining from commenting on this thread I just couldn't help it. Am surprised some women/men actually support the idea of keeping shut about their past. The question is how do you go on hiding such info from your husband/wives? Sleeping on same bed,eating from same plate and sharing intimacy and out of all the gists and gossips couple share the truth doesn't slip out of their mouths,even if its by mistake. Well I did conclude that such women/men DO NOT TRULY LOVE THEIR SPOUSES. They have no conscience at all.

Before I got married I laid it all down to my hubby and he did the same thing. I had a past and he almost had no past compared to mine which I confirmed to be true. Still he loved me for who I was and not what I had done in the past. I was real and very opened and that has really helped us a lot. Its been more than 8 years now and we are still going strong. Its not been a smooth journey but I have living in peace and rest of mind. Not having any fears that he might hear something or see something.

Living everyday of ones life walking on an eggshell is enough to make ones life short (my opinion ). You might think you are happy but deep down within you, your happiness isn't complete.

Opening up your past life to your spouse give you freedom and rest of mind. If he or she truly loves you and is your true partner. He or she will stay by you till the end. Isn't it better you have a forever happy home than having a short one when your spouse finds out your past later in your marriage and breaks up with you?

What will be will be either good,bad or worse.

Ive just been shown a video clip of a girl in a sextape.
Very explicit tape and her face is very clear in the video.
Someone who knows of her showed me the video

Eventually someone is going to marry this girl but if she doesnt tell her husband before hand, the unsuspecting man is one day going to come accross his wifes activities on a porn site. Things like this cant remain hidden for ever.

So we are back to the same solution which is for everyone to behave in the first instance.

tearoses:
Ive just been shown a video clip of a girl in a sextape.
Very explicit tape and her face is very clear in the video.
Someone who knows of her showed me the video

Eventually someone is going to marry this girl but if she doesnt tell her husband before hand, the unsuspecting man is one day going to come accross his wifes activities on a porn site. Things like this cant remain hidden for ever.

So we are back to the same solution which is for everyone to behave in the first instance.

For such a woman the advice to behave herself is quite useless at this point, the deed has been done, she has a "record" now. Tomorrow, when she has her epiphany, she will repent, turn a new creature old things would have been passed away, so she will never mention anything about her past to her future husband.

To think that the future husband will be dancing his heart out at his wedding reception under the assumption that he has found the woman of his dreams.

The advent of social media and the internet actually make the detection of a sordid past easier perhaps is that the reason why the call for men to overlook a woman's past is louder these days?

taryour:
As much as I tried restraining from commenting on this thread I just couldn't help it. Am surprised some women/men actually support the idea of keeping shut about their past. The question is how do you go on hiding such info from your husband/wives? Sleeping on same bed,eating from same plate and sharing intimacy and out of all the gists and gossips couple share the truth doesn't slip out of their mouths,even if its by mistake. Well I did conclude that such women/men DO NOT TRULY LOVE THEIR SPOUSES. They have no conscience at all.
Before I got married I laid it all down to my hubby and he did the same thing. I had a past and he almost had no past compared to mine which I confirmed to be true. Still he loved me for who I was and not what I had done in the past. I was real and very opened and that has really helped us a lot. Its been more than 8 years now and we are still going strong. Its not been a smooth journey but I have living in peace and rest of mind. Not having any fears that he might hear something or see something.
Living everyday of ones life walking on an eggshell is enough to make ones life short (my opinion ). You might think you are happy but deep down within you, your happiness isn't complete.
Opening up your past life to your spouse give you freedom and rest of mind. If he or she truly loves you and is your true partner. He or she will stay by you till the end. Isn't it better you have a forever happy home than having a short one when your spouse finds out your past later in your marriage and breaks up with you?
What will be will be either good,bad or worse.

Couldn't have put it any better! Only the mentally ill and delusional individual will support their spouse not coming clean in their relationship. Kilode for instance who claims she has repented from sucking unwashed assholes and fvcking three guys at once is more free to share her"testimony"on Naira land with her picture on her DP than opening up to her spouse! In other words she is more comfortable marketing her services on Naira land than coming clean to the love of her life. I still repeat that end time marriage counsellors like babyosisi and co are only for the worldly wise ladies who have no thoughts whatsoever for a deep genuine marital relationship based on honesty and openness.

dinachi:

Couldn't have put it any better! Only the mentally ill and delusional individual will support their spouse not coming clean in their relationship. Kilode for instance who claims she has repented from sucking unwashed assholes and fvcking three guys at once is more free to share her"testimony"on Naira land with her picture on her DP than opening up to her spouse! In other words she is more comfortable marketing her services on Naira land than coming clean to the love of her life. I still repeat that end time marriage counsellors like babyosisi and co are only for the worldly wise ladies who have no thoughts whatsoever for a deep genuine marital relationship based on honesty and openness.

Di di bobo
I heard my name
Do you need me nna a?
The way you just dey call my name anyhow,ngwa come here and get some sugar
Mwah!

dBard:



I think the problem in Christendom arose wen ppl started 'interpreting' God's Word according to their own understanding.
Wen Jesus said you have to be like these lil kids to see d kingdom, it also applies to the way we take God's word...verbatim, no addition nor subtraction.

Can't believe a 'woman of God' actually said that.

The Bible is there as a guide to us....

The rest is left to us

So what was the Bible there for, guess that was what guided you to make this statement "Wen Jesus said you have to be like these lil kids to see d kingdom, it also applies to the way we take God's word...verbatim, no addition nor subtraction".
Read psalm 119vs105
Please refer this to the person and the woman of God.

chisco82:

So what was the Bible there for, guess that was what guided you to make this statement "Wen Jesus said you have to be like these lil kids to see d kingdom, it also applies to the way we take God's word...verbatim, no addition nor subtraction".
Read psalm 119vs105
Please refer this to the person and the woman of God.

You're totally right.
God's Word illuminates..
It isn't subject to interpretations, conjectures or whatever...
It, as the scripture in psalm has shown, should be our reference point Not men/women of God

ApexTitan:


For such a woman the advice to behave herself is quite useless at this point, the deed has been done, she has a "record" now. Tomorrow, when she has her epiphany, she will repent, turn a new creature old things would have been passed away, so she will never mention anything about her past to her future husband.

To think that the future husband will be dancing his heart out at his wedding reception under the assumption that he has found the woman of his dreams.

The advent of social media and the internet actually make the detection of a sordid past easier perhaps is that the reason why the call for men to overlook a woman's past is louder these days?

Its like you can see into the future and know what exactly happened.
From what I was told, she used to be very wild.
She would snatch other womens husbands and blatantly put pictures of her and their hubbys on fb just to annoy the wives.
Then she went and did sextapes (me I think jazz was involved and maybe one of the wives wanted to teach her a lesson, but that is a story for another day)
She suddenly went very quiet and became a good girl after the sextape surfaced.
Right now she is a very "good" girl . . . .and waiting for Mr Right
Eventually one unsuspecting young man will propose.

. . and this is why I am saying that its not just enough to hope that your partner is who he/she says they are. We hope that they do, but what if they dont?You owe it to yourself, epsecially these days.

Watch carefully, ask questions and dont be carried away with lovey dovey
Add one and one together;
what was he/she doing in those unaccounted years?
How could she/he afford to live so large when they were in school? his/her parents were petty traders. .. . .runs? yahoo?
When you both visit Abuja, she knows the city like the back of her hand . . . .How? She schooled in Ibadan. Her parents live in Oyo and she has no family in Abuja.

Most importantly listen and listen well . . . .People say a lot of things unconsciously.

A lot of commonsense will start opening your eyes to some things.

You go to a party everyone there knows her/him
She has more enemies than friends . .why?
He has crazy anger issues (could be drink)
He earns good money but is always broke (maybe he has another family elsewhere)

When we go to the market, we check what we are buying very well. We dont always rely on the trader to come clean and say his item is fake.
The trader is wrong for selling you fake goods, but you the person who used good money to buy fake goods are the one who will loose more than the trader.

urchbarbie:
Anaskie come see Bar part 4 question. open test o

Lmao! Guys are vexing!!

babyosisi:
What things should you keep

1. Things you know will shatter him emotionally.for instance a woman,a friend's mom here was teaching me to cook native soup and told me some not so good things about my MIL,claiming she treated my FIL badly.I will be a fool to tell those things to my husband.The consequences will be far reaching so I will be taking that info,true or false to my grave.

2.Details of issues in your own birth family.
Believe me your hubby ain't telling you all of his
So don't go painting your siblings and parents in a terrible light.Some stories you must tell obviously but always leave some details that have to do with family integrity to yourself.Keep your parent's and family honor where necessary especially if you fear it may be used to taunt you as some immature men do.

3 your infidelity ..
This is a controversial one,I believe in faithfulness ,let me make that clear first of all.Women being emotional beings feel the guilt of infidelity more than men.It is wrong to cheat,I will not condone it and by Gods grace will never .However,if you happen to err as humans often do and are remorseful, repent and confess to your God and take that secret to your grave. Revealing it can be disastrous and will serve no purpose.Just go and sin no more .If you are a habitual cheat,of course you should seek divorce rather than living in deception.

It seems this op is trying 2 encourage arranged and deceitful marriages! Madam if U cannot be open enough to share your faults or problems with your spouse who you claim to love, then stay single and don't deceive yourself

Anaskie:
Lmao! Guys are vexing!!

hehehehheeehehheheh. @all. Onadeko dey learn

babyosisi:


Di di bobo
I heard my name
Do you need me nna a?
The way you just dey call my name anyhow,ngwa come here and get some sugar
Mwah!

nwanyi ugwashiukwu dey done ban u for that thread u open

Cheeba:


It seems this op is trying 2 encourage arranged and deceitful marriages! Madam if U cannot be open enough to share your faults or problems with your spouse who you claim to love, then stay single and don't deceive yourself

na today this OP done dey fuuuck outside??

Cheeba:


It seems this op is trying 2 encourage arranged and deceitful marriages! Madam if U cannot be open enough to share your faults or problems with your spouse who you claim to love, then stay single and don't deceive yourself

The OP doesn't encourage infidelity
She encourages women to carry and present themselves well

Cryxtal:
Maybe u are different. But not every man thinks that way

Sup Crys? I sent u a pm and I'm still expecting a reply after 5 days. R u so busy?

Babymama1:


The OP doesn't encourage infidelity
She encourages women to carry and present themselves well

Sister! Can U point out where I wrote,implied or suggested that she is encouraging infidelity? Maybe U should read my original post again! And by the way which 1 is "carry and present themselves well again?" 2 a man that is willing 2 love U with all your warts and all? 2 someone that U are going 2 spend the rest of your life with? With someone U hope 2 raise a family with? Unless u enjoy living a lie or if deception and ulterior motives are your stock in trade, it really makes no sense 2 go into marriage under these conditions! Men fall in love with your character and not your past or family issues! Or are men angels without problems 2?

Baby oku!

Cheeba:


It seems this op is trying 2 encourage arranged and deceitful marriages! Madam if U cannot be open enough to share your faults or problems with your spouse who you claim to love, then stay single and don't deceive yourself

She's not.

The message is: 'Too much information' is unnecessary...'

Even if he/she appears to take it in their stride, you might just arouse an undercurrent of resentment.

BuddhaPalm:


She's not.

The message is: 'Too much information' is unnecessary...'

Even if he/she appears to take it in their stride, you might just arouse an undercurrent of resentment.

Some people have learning disorders

Cheeba:


Sister! Can U point out where I wrote,implied or suggested that she is encouraging infidelity? Maybe U should read my original post again! And by the way which 1 is "carry and present themselves well again?" 2 a man that is willing 2 love U with all your warts and all? 2 someone that U are going 2 spend the rest of your life with? With someone U hope 2 raise a family with? Unless u enjoy living a lie or if deception and ulterior motives are your stock in trade, it really makes no sense 2 go into marriage under these conditions! Men fall in love with your character and not your past or family issues! Or are men angels without problems 2?

Read buddahpalm
He answered you well
Those the message is meant for and those with understanding got it In clear terms

BreezyRita:

Geez! Can't believe I just found thus thread!
Missed much.

But I agree with the op. Wisdom is profitable to direct! Always!
No one is saying to lie. Some things should be left unsaid.
Revealing unnecessary details of your past to him may make him love you more but chances are that he may not be able to trust you wholly. Its not his fault, maybe a subconscious thing.........
Say for instance, you open up to him about sleeping with your friend's bf (before you both got married). Its past. He's cool with it. And everything seems good. But then, someone tells him you're 'doing' his friend, believe me, he'll remember what you told him and start doubting your innocence. You can't change it. We're humans.
Everyone makes mistakes and some are taken to the grave....

Chai you came late
You obviously understood the thread
Let him who has an ear hear


Do not open up anything to anyone about who and what you slept with
Not their business
Yes you had a past life,you don't claim not to have one but that you chopped your landlord for rent or lecturer for a grade is your private business,keep it that way.
In my mailbox are emails from girls who wondered why a man dropped them abruptly and I told them privately the same things i say here
Stop talking too much to any man that says to you nne how far
Stop the stories
Stop destroying yourself with your mouth

babyosisi:


Di di bobo
I heard my name
Do you need me nna a?
The way you just dey call my name anyhow,ngwa come here and get some sugar
Mwah!

e be like say the OP done chop ban

FemiFaniKayode:
e be like say the OP done chop ban

Exactly.

Cryxtal:
Maybe u are different. But not every man thinks that way

how are u doing?

Oriafo123:
The main purpose to divulge d info shows hw much u TRUST each other. A relationship without TRUST is dead, it is better u end d relationship if u don't trust ur partner. Dis advice goes to both men and women.
In other words op u probably have trust issues caused by insecurity as a result of past failed relationships

would you want your wife to leave you when you have given her reasons not to trust you?

Caseless:
how are u doing?

m awesome. N u?

Cryxtal:
m awesome. N u?

fine.

It's been long I saw u here.

Gone back to d north?