donbenedict:
If only she did not had multiple sex partners in her past, these issues wouldn't hav come up.

Stop it nigga! If u've not sinned ever in ur life, cast the first stone

treese:
Though he usually says he doesn't care about my self esteem but I don't think this has to do with self esteem alone. I think there is more. While we were dating we spoke about my sex life and body nature. It's not like I had too many relationships but I just knew men say my vaginal is kind of lax. Even wen I lost my virginity the guy called me a blunt liar to my face, saying I claimed to be a virgin when I wasn't.

You didn't bleed and getting in wasn't so hard. That is one ruined relationship that would have been awesome. And probably the last man standing. If you be virgin, you go know, if you not, you will know and I KNEW then that I was.

Now my husband knew this about my body and decides to stick with it. Somehow someway which I don't know after my first child, vaginal got tight, second child too same happened. To a certain extent it helped our sex life because it made him love it. And I could tell it's one of the reasons he probably hasn't cheated..

Just 2 days back. We had a little misunderstanding then I mentioned something about sèx. Quote me if am wrong. Sex is meant for bonding between a man and a woman and that's why God instituted it in marriage alone. So you both can get closer, and in my own opinion when there are issues BTW them the power of sex is to make forgiveness easy. The next thing my husband said is. It's not like am enjoying the sex. It's now feels like been in a pool.

OMG I was HURT. I lost the essence of life immediately, lost the essence of marriage. Out of anger I told him only men with big dicks should complain, men with pencils dares nor. That was my only defence because he said it with soooooo much heartlessness. I cried...i cried so much. This man that I have back sex with so that our sex life would be whole. Sometimes I bleed. Then I said to myself it's not worth it. Then I realised, For him if anything goes wrong with me due to that sexual style, Am on my own. Few hours later I sent him a text that I was sorry for everything not because it was easy but two wrongs never ever make a right in marriage. Can't walk away with two kids can only make it work.

Following day wen I saw he was in a good mood. I decided to ask, then he said I was lax and it has made sex unenjoyable. I wondered y he didn't tell me immediately he noticed and why he had to throw it to my face. But what, it's a man's world. If they don't reap their mean ways here on earth. It waits in heaven.

But trust me since then I have been concerned,Google all I could, nothing much. Even the kegel exercise has always been my practice. I now feel this time he might just look outside wen sex gets all pool like. He said he will buy toys, he said he can't pretend to love it wen he doesn't. Which I agree with. But even the toys can it ever be Like d real things. Sometimes he might want to feel the woman and not want toys. What happens next? I can't encourage him to cheat cos if he does and I find out I would leave with my kids. But I don't want him to. Am confused. So so confused. You know wen a man is concerned he will probably do research with you, find out info call doctors, but he didn't, he just broke the news to me and he's like do something about it or I might not be making out with u again. It's really not fair. Cos some men might possibly not go about it that way. But at the same time, it's like that's his nature. I can only Leave with it or take a walk. But take a walk to where, becos am now lax? But I also hear sex in marriage is KEY, with two kids, and I love him, but thatz still not the point. I DON'T know. Please who does? I have smiling all over the house, acting like everything is fine once am alone i cry again, because the fear is, would there ever be a solution , would I still be tight again, and this is a marriage where sex is sometimes 1 in 2 or 3 weeks, so definitely that's not the reason for my laxity, i will be sad if my marriage gets ruined because am lax. I hope my husband reads this thank God he is a nairalander

If u know any1 living close 2 u dat comes from Maiduguri tell her u want 2 do "DILKE". Im a man so i cant give u much details (it is strictly a ladies affair) but simply put it is a traditional way of making ladies tight. Wish u all d best

DuchessLily:
Hmmmm..... Babe Ur hubby is already cheating on u.

Continue with ur kegel exercise. Do it more frequently. Or u do surgery. Then also do sit bath

Alum is not safe

how does d sit bath work?

How do I cross boundary.?

Youngpo413:
hahahahaha,guy you don cross boundary o

mechanics:
but u said sex is nt everything n u ran away wen u notice ur ex had d same issue, u shud ave stayed behind to resolve d issue, wat if al d girl u meet ar al lax, u ave to abstain n pray 4 ur partner.

When kids are involved you have to put your personal interest and pleasure aside.

Bridgetown:


When kids are involved you have to put your personal interest and pleasure aside.

den wat if kids ar nt involve?

lozanni:
@Op, have you considered vaginal reconstruction through surgery yet? I saw many cases like yours on a certain DSTV program titled Doctor at 1211? Am not sure about the name now.
The 1211 is a very wealthy surburb of LA, USA and that is where the surgeon is based.
All the ladies who were successfully operated on, later went ahead to live very happy lives.

Not an option dear.

tinuolababy:
Which one is make out again?

U obviously watch only yoruba or nollywood movies cos if u also watch hollywoodor oyibo movies u wld have heard the phrase "make out".

Stop being a local babe....

Madam,I trul feel your pain so much but I want to encourage you hope is not lost. There are few points you made that suggests do not loose heart. The fact you said your body tightened a bit after delivery is a sign of hope. Also the recent rift bw you and hubby could be he harbored a means to hurt you with those comments. May not be that bad. Few questions are the kind of penetrations you've had in the past, or where you born with that condition? Also what about you? Do you feel your hubby's penetration or you also feel empty during sex? Cos I wondered why you shouldn't have noticed it yourself. All these and few other questions will guide in helping you but You sure CAN be helped. Only, its not all possible on this forum. You can send me a text on 08177128221. I seldon pick unknown calls so if you send a text better. Then I can offer some counsel. Iam a marriage counselor. Please take heart and be strong

mechanics:
den wat if kids ar nt involve?

Then you can decide whether to run or marry her and live with it, because there is no point tormenting her latter when you know you could have avoided it just like the way I did by running.
If the lax is as a result of childbirth then you stick to your better for worse since you contributed to her present situation.

Love is not blind but deaf. If only you will understand.

Bridgetown:


Then you can decide whether to run or marry her and live with it, because there is no point tormenting her latter when you know you could have avoided it just like the way I did by running.
If the lax is as a result of childbirth then you stick to your better for worse since you contributed to her present situation.

Love is not blind but deaf. If only you will understand.

hahaha, smart guy, abeg take am easy.

Dubemkelly:

Why do Nigerians bring up a religious stance into a social or emotional ish thereby condemning the involved parties...Well, what a husband and wife do in their bedroom remains personal and nobody should judge...Was there a case where it was recorded in the bible that the vagina is the only suitable place for sex and the ANAL discouraged? Stop bring up invalid points

Anal penetration even in matrimony sounds normal and right to you? Are you a gay or something? In the whole of the bible, was there anywhere anal sex was mentioned close to marriage? If a man was struck because he spilled his semen on the ground just because he wouldn't let his brother's wife have his son or he wouldn't beget a child for his dead brother by his brothers wife as was customary among the then jews then what more could be the punishment of a man who takes pleasure in sticking his dick in a woman's anus for any reason at all. What were the sins of sodom and gomorha? Your little brain tell you it's homosexuality alone? You dare open your mouth to speak about the earnest correction I offered about the business of a couple and what happens in a couples bedroom? Even thieves, rappists and killers perpetrate their evil act in darkness and off the eyes of people most time but does that make it wrong to talk about it or correct them? Let me help you little nitwit. God's idea of marriage was never primarily about sex. It was 1st about companionship. Don't bring the stupid "am an African" or "western civilization' nonsense here. This is a humans life we are talking about. God created Eve primarily as a companion to Adam not some pleasure tool. Sex in marriage is for procreation and making the two into one body (bonding). Let me ask you does anal sex lead to procreation? Read your bible if you are a chritian which I doubt. Even amongst muslims and pegans, it is an abomination to practice such called anal sex. It reduces the woman to a mere object. Let's even forget about religion. Morally, it is disgusting and wrong. Candid interviews with pornographic actors that practice anal sex has shown that they don't enjoy it and the risk they are latter exposed to is very high. For sure they are paid higher because they indulge in the ABNORMAL and they survive the risk because they are advanced in technology but if this young woman in this case is eventually exposed to such risk, who bears the pain and burden? What about the financial implication? If her anal sphincter gets broken or loosen and can't hold up together to trap feaces just like every normal being and she is reduced to using pampers just to save face, will you support her with the necessary fund for the needed operation and will the husband stand by her such time especially with the FOUL SMELL that will be emanating from her? Will you share in her pains then? From your comment, I believe you practice the same with whoever is gullible enough to indulge in such with you. You are just a disgusting prick who takes joy in leading others astray. Put your pix on your profile so ilks like you can be identified and wiped out of the face of this earth so evil can be reduced. Let me enlighten you, even DOGS and wild WILD BEAST don't practice such. This only translates one thing, that you and all those who indulge in such human debasing act are less than the beasts of the earth.
Finally, something tells me you might be the husband of this poor lady but correct me if am wrong but bi and large, let me expose your folly and stupidity right in your hollow headed and pornographic destroyed mind of yours with just one single question. If she was your sister, will you this scum of the earth encourage her to engage in anal sex knowing fully well the health implications even now that you have no respect for God? Will you?

treese:

Am not all that totally expanded, oh well I can't really tell am not the one entering. But I still don't know. I heard alum has its side effects

using alum will peel ur hubby's joystick ooo.

treese:

Am not all that totally expanded, oh well I can't really tell am not the one entering. But I still don't know. I heard alum has its side effects

Pm me if it's a serious problem for you. We can attempt to correct it surgically.

Do not use alum. Vaginal atresia can result and it's very hard to treat.
P. S kindly ignore the title of my moniker. I penned it for fun.

That's just FEELINGS
Watch it here


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leDmNFC6kxI

There is a very simple way to make the vagina tight during intercourse. Infact it makes it tighter than that of a virgin

5minsmadness:

Pm me if it's a serious problem for you. We can attempt to correct it surgically.

Do not use alum. Vaginal atresia can result and it's very hard to treat.
P. S kindly ignore the title of my moniker. I penned it for fun.

You see ur life outside? I must confess I have also never taken you serious because of ur moniker, don't blame me

5minsmadness:

Pm me if it's a serious problem for you. We can attempt to correct it surgically.

Do not use alum. Vaginal atresia can result and it's very hard to treat.
P. S kindly ignore the title of my moniker. I penned it for fun.

Why don't you tell her here?

She is already have problems of confiding in males with her husband

Open a thread on diaries section so people cannot interrupt.

I am very sure it will be useful for others.

Kimoni:


You see ur life outside? I must confess I have also never taken you serious because of ur moniker, don't blame me

But I like this moniker
And you should never judge a book by its cover!

Who are you anyway? have been trying to guess, you are definitely not new to nairaland.

bukatyne:


Why don't you tell her here?

She is already have problems of confiding in males with her husband

Open a thread on diaries section so people cannot interrupt.

I am very sure it will be useful for others.

Ok,good idea.

Treese if interested pls indicate here then we can discuss on this or another thread.

5minsmadness:


But I like this moniker
And you should never judge a book by its cover!

Who are you anyway? have been trying to guess, you are definitely not new to nairaland.

Com'on it's obvious naa

I had a girl friend who was so experience about stuff like this. She uses honey and some other stuffs like that, her breast point directly downward but her Virginia is very okay that got me thinking everyday until the day she told me the truth. Immediately after ejaculation the pe.nis will dry off and somehow sticky ready for another round, though it feels good.

Kimoni:


Com'on it's obvious naa

Aisha?

5minsmadness:

Aisha?

Kimoni:

OK wait, let sleep leave my eye first, I'll definitely figure it out.

nortcentrallord:



Anal penetration even in matrimony sounds normal and right to you? Are you a gay or something? In the whole of the bible, was there anywhere anal sex was mentioned close to marriage? If a man was struck because he spilled his semen on the ground just because he wouldn't let his brother's wife have his son or he wouldn't beget a child for his dead brother by his brothers wife as was customary among the then jews then what more could be the punishment of a man who takes pleasure in sticking his dick in a woman's anus for any reason at all. What were the sins of sodom and gomorha? Your little brain tell you it's homosexuality alone? You dare open your mouth to speak about the earnest correction I offered about the business of a couple and what happens in a couples bedroom? Even thieves, rappists and killers perpetrate their evil act in darkness and off the eyes of people most time but does that make it wrong to talk about it or correct them? Let me help you little nitwit. God's idea of marriage was never primarily about sex. It was 1st about companionship. Don't bring the stupid "am an African" or "western civilization' nonsense here. This is a humans life we are talking about. God created Eve primarily as a companion to Adam not some pleasure tool. Sex in marriage is for procreation and making the two into one body (bonding). Let me ask you does anal sex lead to procreation? Read your bible if you are a chritian which I doubt. Even amongst muslims and pegans, it is an abomination to practice such called anal sex. It reduces the woman to a mere object. Let's even forget about religion. Morally, it is disgusting and wrong. Candid interviews with pornographic actors that practice anal sex has shown that they don't enjoy it and the risk they are latter exposed to is very high. For sure they are paid higher because they indulge in the ABNORMAL and they survive the risk because they are advanced in technology but if this young woman in this case is eventually exposed to such risk, who bears the pain and burden? What about the financial implication? If her anal sphincter gets broken or loosen and can't hold up together to trap feaces just like every normal being and she is reduced to using pampers just to save face, will you support her with the necessary fund for the needed operation and will the husband stand by her such time especially with the FOUL SMELL that will be emanating from her? Will you share in her pains then? From your comment, I believe you practice the same with whoever is gullible enough to indulge in such with you. You are just a disgusting prick who takes joy in leading others astray. Put your pix on your profile so ilks like you can be identified and wiped out of the face of this earth so evil can be reduced. Let me enlighten you, even DOGS and wild WILD BEAST don't practice such. This only translates one thing, that you and all those who indulge in such human debasing act are less than the beasts of the earth.
Finally, something tells me you might be the husband of this poor lady but correct me if am wrong but bi and large, let me expose your folly and stupidity right in your hollow headed and pornographic destroyed mind of yours with just one single question. If she was your sister, will you this scum of the earth encourage her to engage in anal sex knowing fully well the health implications even now that you have no respect for God? Will you?

May God continue to bless you from generation to generation!

Dubemkelly:

Why do Nigerians bring up a religious stance into a social or emotional ish thereby condemning the involved parties...Well, what a husband and wife do in their bedroom remains personal and nobody should judge...Was there a case where it was recorded in the bible that the vagina is the only suitable place for sex and the ANAL discouraged? Stop bring up invalid points

Just take a look at what you typed? Now does the woman approve of faeces fūcking? That the man wants to indulge in faeces dicking doesn't mean the woman should do that against her own wish. We Nigerians want our wives to die for us bah? Bed mating, pregnancy, labour, child upbringing, etc ain't enough kwo? You now want her to start using anûs to collect the husbands toothpick dick kwo?

If a man knows he's a faeces fan, he should just go to US and marry a man rather than marrying a woman and then complaining later that her vagina is too wide for his toothpick.

francizy:


May God continue to bless you from generation to generation!

Thanks bro. Sometimes it's ok to let it all out. Some people have lost all sense of morality. They not only set upon the part of destruction themselves alone but they drag others along with them all in the name of privacy, western civilization and African mentality.

nortcentrallord:



Anal penetration even in matrimony sounds normal and right to you? Are you a gay or something? In the whole of the bible, was there anywhere anal sex was mentioned close to marriage? If a man was struck because he spilled his semen on the ground just because he wouldn't let his brother's wife have his son or he wouldn't beget a child for his dead brother by his brothers wife as was customary among the then jews then what more could be the punishment of a man who takes pleasure in sticking his dick in a woman's anus for any reason at all. What were the sins of sodom and gomorha? Your little brain tell you it's homosexuality alone? You dare open your mouth to speak about the earnest correction I offered about the business of a couple and what happens in a couples bedroom? Even thieves, rappists and killers perpetrate their evil act in darkness and off the eyes of people most time but does that make it wrong to talk about it or correct them? Let me help you little nitwit. God's idea of marriage was never primarily about sex. It was 1st about companionship. Don't bring the stupid "am an African" or "western civilization' nonsense here. This is a humans life we are talking about. God created Eve primarily as a companion to Adam not some pleasure tool. Sex in marriage is for procreation and making the two into one body (bonding). Let me ask you does anal sex lead to procreation? Read your bible if you are a chritian which I doubt. Even amongst muslims and pegans, it is an abomination to practice such called anal sex. It reduces the woman to a mere object. Let's even forget about religion. Morally, it is disgusting and wrong. Candid interviews with pornographic actors that practice anal sex has shown that they don't enjoy it and the risk they are latter exposed to is very high. For sure they are paid higher because they indulge in the ABNORMAL and they survive the risk because they are advanced in technology but if this young woman in this case is eventually exposed to such risk, who bears the pain and burden? What about the financial implication? If her anal sphincter gets broken or loosen and can't hold up together to trap feaces just like every normal being and she is reduced to using pampers just to save face, will you support her with the necessary fund for the needed operation and will the husband stand by her such time especially with the FOUL SMELL that will be emanating from her? Will you share in her pains then? From your comment, I believe you practice the same with whoever is gullible enough to indulge in such with you. You are just a disgusting prick who takes joy in leading others astray. Put your pix on your profile so ilks like you can be identified and wiped out of the face of this earth so evil can be reduced. Let me enlighten you, even DOGS and wild WILD BEAST don't practice such. This only translates one thing, that you and all those who indulge in such human debasing act are less than the beasts of the earth.
Finally, something tells me you might be the husband of this poor lady but correct me if am wrong but bi and large, let me expose your folly and stupidity right in your hollow headed and pornographic destroyed mind of yours with just one single question. If she was your sister, will you this scum of the earth encourage her to engage in anal sex knowing fully well the health implications even now that you have no respect for God? Will you?

Dude! you quoted the wrong person! Swerve, do what's right for you. What I do with my wife in my bedroom is none of your damn business

francizy:


Just take a look at what you typed? Now does the woman approve of faeces fūcking? That the man wants to indulge in faeces dicking doesn't mean the woman should do that against her own wish. We Nigerians want our wives to die for us bah? Bed mating, pregnancy, labour, child upbringing, etc ain't enough kwo? You now want her to start using anûs to collect the husbands toothpick dick kwo?

If a man knows he's a faeces fan, he should just go to US and marry a man rather than marrying a woman and then complaining later that her vagina is too wide for his toothpick.

Omo dey your lane na...You come online dey form innocent but no award dey here. No go die on top person's headache. We all have different aversions and inclinations, what rocks my boat might not rock yours.

Dubemkelly:

Dude! you quoted the wrong person! Swerve, do what's right for you. What I do with my wife in my bedroom is none of your damn business

I don't think you have wife maybe you have a sex doll or an object not a human. From you profile pix, you are just another teenager who is a little confused of about their sexuality. You remind me of Bruce Jenna. I never offered you advice. My advice was for the op but you forced my quote upon you mention of mine. Why put a poor woman through what she doesn't enjoy or what you wouldn't wish on your sister or what you wouldn't want to hear your dad wished on your mum. Someday your kids will grow up and when they learn of your depravity, how will they look at you? Be truthfull to yourself and answer yourself.

nortcentrallord:



I don't think you have wife maybe you have a sex doll or an object not a human. From you profile pix, you are just another teenager who is a little confused of about their sexuality. You remind me of Bruce Jenna. I never offered you advice. My advice was for the op but you forced my quote upon you mention of mine. Why put a poor woman through what she doesn't enjoy or what you wouldn't wish on your sister or what you wouldn't want to hear your dad wished on your mum. Someday your kids will grow up and when they learn of your depravity, how will they look at you? Be truthfull to yourself and answer yourself.

STFU...Stop making silly assumption if you don't know jack about someone. I keep saying this Your sex life is a personal decision and things should be kept mutual. Nothing wrong with discussing one's short comings in marriage and my stance remains that religion shouldn't be brought into social n emotional scenarios, if my wife and I are comfortable with any sexual adventure, why would a third party question our taste?