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Is It Right For Me To Ask My Mum To Divorce My Dad?? / My Dad Gave N3m To His Boss' Wife To Buy Vehicle For Him, Now He's Dead / My Dad Cheated On My Mum Before She Died And He's Still Doing It (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 12:52pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555:alright. but u know what, from all you've said. u don't know God. a prayerless Christian is identical with backsliding and always having problems. commit your issues to God one on one, don't let anyone disturb u wen you're praying. u can equally pray at d mid night why everyone is far asleep. Read Proverbs 3 vs 5. u can read it from 3- 1 to 6, but i want u to understand something from verse 5. thanks & pax! |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by alexis2: 12:59pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
my dear,I understand your plight perfectly.i know ts difficult,but try as much as possible even if ts for a week,try playing according to his tunes and know what's up. please,considering your emotional turmoil now,it can drive u insane or do something u wouldn't consider doing on a normal day.if worse comes to worse, go to a relatives. the Lord will help u... |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by UglyMe(f): 1:27pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Estharfabian: |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by sapientia(m): 1:31pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Sweetyie:Ege igidigo |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Apitch(m): 1:37pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
aloeeverhealth:Your write up made me comment before finishing what I'm reading but I have to advice U real quick. Ur dad's way of training might be bad to you but I can say he meant well and punishing him now is so wrong I had a dad that sent us to Creative Minds Foundation, a white man's school and even when flogging was strictly prohibited, he made a special case that we should be exempted and flogged, what wickedness I thought, but now I adore him for all those harsh trainings cos without them, I wouldn't be who I am U said it urself that he saw U tru school, who does that? A friend or Foe? I rest my case 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by onila(f): 1:38pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555: I will beat the shit out of me |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Corn99(m): 1:54pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
i wont lie to u therock555 we're in d same shoes buh my dad does nt curse me nd he's a pastor nd even has a ph.d, but he'll go to d extent of taking my fone nd checking all my acc (e.g 2go, facebook). let me share one dat happened recently, i wanted to carry a baby buh because of my long fingernails i mistakenly scratch d baby's back nd d white blood cell was visible, so i dont later und hw he got to knw abt it, he just called me to d parlour nd in front of small children he started flogging me expecting me to start crying buh i held d pain nd even was talking back at him which made him to begin another round, i still endured nd after dat he told me dat if he sight me carrying any baby he'll disgrace me right dere. so i stood up nd left. in another 5 min he called 4 me which i responded, he den instructed me to cut my finger nails which i did nd later told me in yoruba "maje kin ri e pelu pelu omokomo yen mo o" (meaning dont let me see u with dat bad child again) den i asked who, he said he does nt knw which means he expected me to cry while he was flogging me nd so thought my frends must have been advicing me against him. dats just one of d numerous tins which made me nt to change even if i'm tinking of changing cos i knw he'll never change towards him buh i promise when i come back frm sch after 1st semester nxt yr i will nt take such nonsense frm him again cos i've just gained admission. nd dere's somtin i wont to bring out all he's doin only harden my heart nd no iota of change is visible i swear! 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by onila(f): 1:57pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555: dont blame ur father, since u have the brain science has better opportunities but since u have no passion at all, I suggest u switch to arts my friend good in literature like you but father wants her to be a medical doctor. her father is a medical doctor at least, she has a lil passion for medicine, so she was able to pull thru unlike you dear 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by donifez(m): 2:04pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555: That is a hard nut, i guess he does not have an atom of trust for you, such trust are hard to build again. Do not give up. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by activelyA(f): 2:06pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555:Dull movement!!! Man offends you are you stop working for God! Irony....is not as if it was God who offended you oo. The funniest part is that if you don't do it, God will raised someone (who is in a deep problem than you but is willing to work for God) to do it and use that as a point of contact to solve his problems. Common sense isn't common. 2 Likes |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by raayah(f): 2:06pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Apitch: Are you better than all the students that were not flogged?? How you people defend child abuse is against me! Let me tell you something, the canings did not make you a better man. You made yourself a better man. Most of the armed robbers and bad people you see in the world were caned a lot for flimsy reasons. They build up resentment and lose empathy for people because no one showed them empathy when they needed it. If Caning is so good, why do people complain as adults when soldiers flog them to keep them in order.? Flogging children is easy because you have systematic power over them and you want to enforce it. Its a power trip in my opinion. Let me ask you what reasons you were flogged for. 1. You were making noise/ disrupting the class ? Does it really require 12 strokes of cane if a teenager is babbling like they always do. A teacher should tell you to keep quiet and send you out of the class if its continuous. 2. You were late to school? Maybe because of hold-up or morning chores that your parents send you to do or maybe you just woke up late? Does it really require you to be flogged? Even if a child gets into a fight, i still don't know why they should be flogged. They can be punished , suspended, taken to have conflict resolution meetings not flogged. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 2:10pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Crazy parenting. Your Father has issues and he is taking it out on you. Bid your time as soon as you can stand on your feet which you should be working towards by now get out of his house. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 2:12pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Laid2001: Nothing is going to happen if he turns out not to be like his father Keep deceiving yourself ehn |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 2:13pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Elxandre: You cannot fault him The more you make life difficult for a erring child, the more he rebels.....fact He and his father needs counselling. He should learn to keep mum and his dad must learn to use positive reinforcements. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 2:15pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555:. Stop blaming your dad. Man up! And take charge of your life 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by raayah(f): 2:20pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
daretodiffer: I tire oh! Father has been disciplining him for 21 years and he did not change. It's time for the father to sit and think where he as a father went wrong. 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by doctor90210: 2:24pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Hey, I can relate well with your story bro. My reply is long, but I want you to get what it means to have an abusive father. Unlike you, I was an only son, always top of my class. Infact my father didn't really have any expectations from me, neither did he get impressed/acknowledge by my achievements. But of course, bad behaviors don't go unpunished. I can't recall ever getting a gift for being top of my class (Especially in secondary school). My classmates who come 2nd/3rd come to school boasting about the gifts they got for their position. My father was so strict that I don't dare talk in his presence talkless of opposing him, EVEN AFTER I BECAME A DOCTOR. I get beaten over trivial things too (Like crying for a bigger meat) and sometimes end up in the hospital and missing school cos of injuries he has inflicted on me. My childhood was filled with physical and emotional abuse. I used to have red eyes, when he is talking to me and i mistakenly look at him, a hot slap will automatically land on my face & then he'll say I've been smoking weed (I don't go out, not rebellious, I didnt have friends I'd never seen weed in my life), only for me to find out when I started working and went to see an ophthalmologist that I had an eye condition which could've been treated better if diagnosed early. The day i wrote jamb, he didn't even give me t.fare, said he didn't have money, only to come back to meet chicken soup (Mom said he brought out money after I left). I remember my Uni days-the worst period of my life, I survived by being parasites to people. I was still getting flogged as an undergraduate. People used to tell me he loved me and only trying to discipline me & when I grow up, he'll change. He loved my sisters more than me and never hid it. While in secondary school, he had severally forced me to put scarification marks on my face and body (cos a neighbor/stranger gave it to him). Note, he is a university graduate & claims to be a pastor on the outside. I refused and he called me a bastard (He does that a lot when he is angry). Of course I have those marks till now. When I started working, I didn't take revenge. He couldn't keep a job so I had to take over the financial running of the house. I thought we could get closer at that point but it got worse. He started using my money to chase women & started having issues with mum. Once I send any bulk money, he'll take off and leave the house till after a month and wont use the money for what its meant for. Even at this period , I couldnt really talk to him about anything. He only asks for money and I send, pay my sister's school fees and all. Whenever I tried to talk him about their issues after neighbors got tired of settling fights (calmy of course), he always called me a bastard again and then rain curses. I reduced the money I was sending him, but kept taking care of other things. He later threatened to sell our ONLY house and move on with his life which he did (for a ridiculous amount) despite my efforts to dissuade him. He then took off and no one knew where he was. We had a big fight, he later apologized when he finished spending the money and his new woman left him. I let it go and we started talking again. When I started a serious relationship, I introduced my fiance to him. He didn't come for our intro though (gave excuses). The wedding came, he started another issue. Said I didn't come to check on him since he sold the house, so we shouldn't expect him at the wedding ( I work in the north, been here since grad). HE DIDN'T COME FOR MY WEDDING, even though it took place in Lagos where he resides. He even warned people/his family not to come & cursed whoever shows up there. I knew this because I travelled to ibadan to invite some elderly family members and one of them called him to congratulate him in my presence and placed the phone on speaker, what he said said was shocking!! He called my wife too b4 the wedding and threatened her not to marry me. The wedding was successful, thank God. When we had our first child, he came begging again as usual, called my wife and was seriously apologising saying it was the devil who took over him. I COULD HAVE DEVELOPED SOME PSYCHIATRIC PROBLEMS ALONG THE WAY/BECOME REBELLIOUS AND A NUISANCE BUT THANK GOD I OVERCAME THE SITUATION BECOMING A STRONGER MAN. I only gave him one reply : I HAVE NO MORE PLACE IN MY LIFE FOR YOU! An abusive father will always be abusive. They'll take out their frustration on their children, some can even kill (this is happening these days). When you start making it and giving them money, some can then pretend to love you, while others can't pretend for long like in my case. Bro, try to be a good kid. Do what your father wants while you're under him but if the torment continues, let that be your addition motivation to succeed in life. Endure till you can be independent, then decide how you want to relate with him from then on. 10 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by sunnico(m): 2:26pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
hello Bro, I know you would think you are going through a lot of suffering right now, with all the way you are being treated by your father, but the truth is that in this life everybody has a cross to bear, for some people that cross might be their siblings,friend,wife, but yours is just a powerful one because either u are right or wrong your parents words(curses or blessings) would always have an impact in your life. But the truth about life is that if u should hear another persons cause of tribulation u would get to know yours is even better. My advice for you is Do not leave the house cos it would never solve the problem, u would just be postponing it to some other time. Never ever try or even for a second think of fighting with your parents Actually check yourself and see if truly u are not wanting in any part. Lastly find a moment to go to your father with humbleness tell him to forgive you for everything or anyway u might have wronged him. I believe your father being a military man might be one reason why he is strict, but if truly he is human this should change his feeling towards you.. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Akinrogun(m): 2:28pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Estharfabian: see advice o....shoroniyen....thou shall not kill a fellow human being....and d Supreme God will not change His law because of any man. u want him to carry a guilt ridden soul all his life..... no....there's a better way out of this quagmire. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by onila(f): 2:41pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Corn99: u deserve to be beaten how dare u scratch a babys back 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 2:42pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
raayah: Our parents are always right no matter what The OP needs to apply wisdom. He shouldn't stop arguing with him else he would sina gaisbt God. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Corn99(m): 3:03pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
onila:it was nt intentional like i said b4 nd d child's abt 2 yrs old nt a fresh baby |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 3:10pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Corn99:what are you doing with long nails by the way? |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 3:19pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
doctor90210: Wow!! People really go through things like this?? Hmmmmm |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Corn99(m): 3:40pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
firstEVA:nd on a more serious note my nails are nt dat long buh very sharp, it just luk likd hw a normal finger nail is |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 3:52pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555: Go n report ur father to child rights services or go to the police. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by GboyegaD(m): 4:23pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
AfroKnight: Sorry I had to quote you because I never planned commenting on this topic. You don't know his story so you can't conclude. You are not been frank because you are comparing yourself with him and making a conclusion that might not be true. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by GboyegaD(m): 4:35pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Therock5555: Stop been defensive and the picture isn't pleasant in anyway. If someone chooses to judge you by your profile picture, it is because that is the one of the things they can use in concluding your person. |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by iliyande(m): 4:39pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Sweetyie: elee gidi gon |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by Nobody: 4:42pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Atmmachine: So true |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by marlockj: 4:57pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
rose4flower: Fada or moda all parents and they equally have their days. Also you parents where right to treat you the way they did,concerning ur rply here. Your still a fooooolish child irrespective of the treatment. 1 Like |
Re: My Dad Wishes Me Death, Please Help by GboyegaD(m): 4:58pm On Nov 24, 2015 |
Corn99: If your conscience is clear you are doing things right, you don't have to change. If you know there are some wrong things you engage in, the change is for your own good. There are ways to stop the abuse but confronting him in a disrespectful manner is not. |
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