It was on my wedding day, my friends was like "guy u need to get high ordinary eye no fit do am o" initially I refused but after much much I gave in and took just one cup of Joven hmmm na so I started dancing like something else the funniest part was when they asked me to prostrate for my In-laws I no gree stand up again before they know I don sleep off..

linsa01:


I can guess. When he drops the akamu inside, you use alcohol to flush the base for prevention.

I don't use alcohol for that purpose.

Wrong guess.

. Ada9103

Ada9103:
What's alcohol

see me in my offic

Though I have many experiences but would narrate my first time experience.
It was in secondary school,during an excursion. At d beach,an argument ensued on who could finish a carton of" Don Simon".I was d most quiet gal then,they didn't believe me when I stood up to the challenge.
On my way home,a neighbour saw me n said "this one wey u dey waka like dis,e be like say u don high". I had to change my steps to appear normal cos it was as if the road was full of imaginable "potholes" and I was trying to dodge them under influence of alcohol. Lol.

HEre to read the life Story of DRUNKARDS

In 2011,i threw moi Nokia c3 inside water, immediately after dat action, moi eyes got cleared... #shayo na bastard #

Adeoba10:
I gained admission n went back home after first semester. To show dat Mesef don arrive/belong, i decided to taste Rose Daniel n experience how all dis drunkard felt, after taking like 6shots, dats wen i started dis drama. I saw dis lady going to d market with her mum, i just grabbed her booby, d next tin i heard was Gbas! Gbos! Gbis!. The Gbas was d slap i received from her mum, d Gbos was from d owner of booby while d Gbis was from dos garage boys. Instantly, my eye clear like morning dew. Since den, i dey always run from alcohol.

Most hilarious thing I've read in a long time.

teesmarth:
we all know wetin u wan do

Ok Sir!.

virginboy1:
Just Imagine

Nigerian Breweries recorded sales of almost N300 billion
in 2015 while Guinness is expected to record sales of
N275 billion totaling almost =N=600 Billion (About $3
billion) which is about 3% of our GDP. That is about 3
billion bottles of beer and when distributed across 170
million people is about 200 bottles per person a year.
The average Nigerian is either a Christian or a Muslim.
Both religions enjoined adherents to avoid alcohol. So,
who drank=N=600 billion worth of alcohol in one year? A
country of unassailable contradictions... More churches
and mosques than anywhere else on the continent.
Please who drank it?
This is interesting because It does not include paraga,
and other assorted foreign and local drinks like Ogogoro,
palm wine, alomo, kerewa, etc. If these are added, only
God knows...!

But please answer me... Who drank it?

I absolutely agree with you. A country of hypocrites and pretentious humans.

Vote FALCONEY 4 MR NAIRALAND!!!

wanted to touch transformer and there was light that time. U people can't believe me, I nearly touch it. Ok let me say I was a inch away to touch the live transformer in my village. Even the party t I want to in that particular day took place infront of my wife house and I never married or know her that time. But people explained to me how I rubbish myself in that party. Just opposite my wife house then. And I got to know her later that year. I also thank God for my life, because If you ask me when last did I take beer or any alchol, my answer would be...maybe Dec 2009. Hallelujah!

For those that know Ilorin well... I trekked from Kwara Hotel to Tanke!

Ada9103:
What's alcohol

Alchl is fruit juice...

virginboy1:
Just Imagine

Nigerian Breweries recorded sales of almost N300 billion
in 2015 while Guinness is expected to record sales of
N275 billion totaling almost =N=600 Billion (About $3
billion) which is about 3% of our GDP. That is about 3
billion bottles of beer and when distributed across 170
million people is about 200 bottles per person a year.
The average Nigerian is either a Christian or a Muslim.
Both religions enjoined adherents to avoid alcohol. So,
who drank=N=600 billion worth of alcohol in one year? A
country of unassailable contradictions... More churches
and mosques than anywhere else on the continent.
Please who drank it?
This is interesting because It does not include paraga,
and other assorted foreign and local drinks like Ogogoro,
palm wine, alomo, kerewa, etc. If these are added, only
God knows...!

But please answer me... Who drank it?

How u take know the names. Lolzzz which one be kerewa again o. Nigerians and giving nick

I just de do any how inside danfo sotay I begin tell driver day I wan drop for 3rd mainland bridge.shout out 2 all dem shackers associatn of Nigeria

I slept in a laterine.

zealz4u:
I vomited in ma room, Iost my phone after taking too many bottles of beer & palm wine It can't happen again cos I'm a changed man.

beer n pami na very rugged combo, u go high scatter

Mg own experience happened 8yrs ago on easter day.I went out with friends and got drunk...I vomited on my bed and my mum came to woke me up with heavy slaps the next morning.since then,I started drinking responsibly.

I have NEVER taken alcohol before.

herbie27:
I don't use alcohol for that purpose.

Wrong guess.

ok. Lemme guess again. I'm coming

Went to a bar (Extreme, Ind Layout 042) with two friends of mine. One was a crazy drinker who could guzzle one bottle of Legend every 20 Mins and continue at that rate for like 4 hours. I'd had 5 botts Heineken. My other guy; don't know how many he took.

While we were there, some UNEC students came along to celebrate a fellow student's birthday. DJ decided to spin Karaoke for them. Tell him any choice of song and he'll play the instrumental while you sing along with the mic.

O boy see opportunity to display. I'm an Eminem freak, I come see opportunity to display my rapping talent. I didn't know that with the alcohol in my system, my brain was now processing stuff at the rate of 1 word per minute.

I went and told the DJ to play me 'Love the way you lie' ft Rihanna. DJ said OK. After the song currently playing. I don't know if I heard him well o, cos I went back to my seat and was gisting. Babe finished her song and mine came on. Na so I stagger stagger rush collect mic o. Instead of me to get into the flow, I just started giving speech like Martin Luther King and dedicating the song to all lovers of rap. Eminem started rapping. I rush follow am join.

Hmm... This is a song I can rap from A to Z, if you wake me up from sleep.

I just forgot how it started. People begin look me like 'ha ahn... After the whole speech thing?' I try come remember some, but no matter how hard I tried, I was just following the song with 5 seconds delay. Yet I no send. The Aki was too powerful. Even the mumu beside me that attempted to assist me and sing Rihanna's chorus was bleating like one ram that just won scholarship (guy abeg if you are reading this, no vex o. Na the reality of that night ).

My other guy (the Legend guzzler) just vacated the table. That was a night I'll never forget.

my story almost got hit by a car after taking alcohol, then I lost two ATM's after taking alcohol and going to the ATM to withdraw cash. I just took the money and forgot the ATM lol....actually 3 times got it back just once.

my story almost got hit by a car after taking alcohol, then I lost two ATM's after taking alcohol and going to the ATM to withdraw cash. I just took the money and forgot the ATM lol....actually 3 times got it back just once...thank God I'm totally sober now...actually the second time I wasn't drunk

Owliver:
after POP NYSC had two don Simon, one star and some hot drink. I blanked out. bought cloths and a belt without knowing. paid excess(6500).

I got to know when I got home thanks to my friend who took me home and paid my T fare home(500) from state capital(ado ekiti)


stupid cloths and fake belt for that matter, didn't wear them after that day.


peed in the middle of the road in a busy market at ado ekiti. threw my certificate away. a car almost hit me.

went home and straight to my babe's house to show them my new clothes WTFk

after that my eye clear. they told me every nonsense I did I was shocked.

*edited

i was also told i went in front of abokis selling onions and be shouting Allahu akubar. allahu akubar

bros devil was all out to kill u one way or d oda dat day, frm throwing away ya cert. to a car tryna knock u dwn to shouting allahu akbar, bros wetin u do dem witches for villa

It was my roomie's birthday so I drank plenty of Magic moment and some other kinda Gin.
Woke up the next morning the guy don vomit everywhere ...my phone rang and I rushed to class ...It was test on Algorithms and I could rwmber the Dr. asked me to stand up and explain wat is Internet of things and I replied IOT she said wat is IOT I said Internet of things ...I saw her as though she dey double sha .. and later without anyone inviting me to podium I started singing ...Baba y u lying ...like that craze clown ...
After two days I got 0/30 sha...

(2013) Uniport's convocation ceremony coincided with Nigeria's nations cup final. To cut short story short while Mba and Nigerians were celebrating i was on top of my vomit in my friends kitchen. Started sleeping by 5pm woke up by 1am.

(2015) Me and 2 of my guys go on a red label spree at the beach in abk. I was literally carried home. My neice after seeing my massive throwing up was like is "brother Ab goin to die"

2016) As a good gentle bf I decided to flex my gal, after much highness we came back and she started the good English routine. onething led to another a fight ensued and i learnt d hard way neva to fight with an intoxicated bae. She use my mama flask take stone me. From den onwards i made sure she stuck with soft drinks

Mine was walking up at 4am in the morning to cook indomie with pressing iron and then go for lectures at that same time

I came here to read of ladies who got drunk and stripped nekkid but not seen any yet...
I made a girl drunk and made her take off all her clothes in front on me and my friend then fvcked her..Guess what? She only remember d fvck part.And I regret doing such to such a sweet girl and sum1s daughter...

greggng:
I toasted a mad woman and she accepted. The next day I saw her and ran away. It wasn't funny at all

Lol

I said stupidly amazing things, passed out later in my room after vomiting beside my bed. I've been responsible since then but still taking shots on shots

Lolllllsssss........I love juice

poseidonsaiz:




Alchl is fruit juice...