Pastor Adeboye is only a man whom God uses from time to time, but is not to say that there would be times when he would air his opinions on certain issues and matters. There are several instances of a similar scenario in which some of the outspoken disciples, who though, led by the Holy Spirit, gave certain erroneous opinions which contradict God’s Word (this is a Sunday topic which I would one day post on here). Don’t get me wrong, please, I am not saying Pastor Adeboye’s opinion is outwrightly wrong. As a matter of fact, you’ll understand him very well if you see the movie ‘War Room’.

The first day I set my eyes on the movie ‘War Room’, I told myself every lady/woman who desires a successful home must see the movie. As a matter of fact, it is a movie ladies and women must watch time and time again to be able to decipher every scene of the heart wrenching movie, I mean theists and Christian ladies of course.

But why the outrage then? Why call for E.A Adeboye’s head when what he said is actually not directed at a particular person? Why are guys reacting negatively to the comment made by the pastor?

Herein lies the hypocrisy of most Nigerian girls. At 17-26, you have your own spec and criteria suitors must meet before being considered worthy of heart matters, majorly, tall, rich, dark and handsome. Who doesn’t love a complete package? Even the guys do, trust me!

And at 27-upwards, most girls tend to lean towards ‘the will of God’ as ‘God fearing’ seems to be the major criterion they look out for, with the ‘as long as he has something doing, then there is hope’ consolatory sentence. What then happens to you as a girl if all you look for is a God-fearing, well to do man who would love you with the fear of God in his heart and put you first in all things?

Truth is, ‘War Room’ opened my eyes further about the power of a wife and that of a woman. As a Christian man, I cherish the thought of my wife praying for my success and life pursuit and not just to kill enemies in a fall and die manner, because this is what comes to mind mostly when prayer in a family home is concerned.

So, is Pastor Adeboye right then to list prayer as the major criterion in choosing a wife? Perhaps not, spiritual growth is one thing in a relationship, other aspects are just as important as the one aforementioned. For example, a woman who sucks at keeping resources or money is not fit to even think of marriage, just as a woman who believes that she is equal in all ramifications with a man? In summary growth on every side must be duly checked if one is to talk about getting married.

Personally, I wouldn’t choose a spouse based on her culinary skill and prayer life alone. Marriage is way beyond these two things and one must be sure one knows what he wants in order to make the best of life.

Praying for an hour is a bit exaggerated, as a vocalist I could as well look out for a lady who can pitch and sustain and sing beautifully. The place of prayer in a home cannot be over-emphasized, but that does not guarantee a lasting union. As a matter of fact, most issues plaguing homes are so tiny that one would need a microscope to fish them out before knowing the type of prayer to apply to the situation.

Several pastors have divorced their spouse, while some, though separated, often claim their spouse is hindering their spiritual growth. Does it then mean that the woman does not pray enough? Does it mean that they don’t know God enough? Where then is the problem? Who is to blame for the failure of the marriage, the head, also known as the man or the woman who is supposed to pray for at least an hour?

There are several many focal points as far as marriage is concerned. As a lady, if you want a God-fearing man, be sure your life oozes some level of spirituality so as to be on par with the man you probably want to spend the rest of your life with, and if you’re a man, yet to be married and overly zealous with spiritual matters, please do not base your Ultimate Search on a one-hour prayer bout and her culinary skills. Certain areas such as level of intelligence, general compatibility, common interests, differences, orientation, perspective on life issues, temperament, sex life, and so many other things. Those two are just some of the determinants and NOT ALL that is needed in having a successful home.


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Mynd44