Opting out of white wedding has nothing to do with anything rather it shows more maturity as that white clothing (Gown) won't be made nonsense of. You know, it should signify purity when it comes to virginity being intact up until that day. But since that is not the case, out of church wedding is even more desirable,reliable and realistic.

Apart from that, wedding can be done in the court, village square, at home etc. I hate to see couples running to churches only when marriage comes up.

Now that the meaning of wedding is 'come and chop' and spending spree, debts-gathering, it is even a good thing to start the new family on a very good footing financially.

You can decide how your wedding should be, in agreement with your would-be husband, nothing strange.

Nothing strange please feel free to choose the kind of wedding you want in as far it suit you and your couple just go ahead your happiness is the most important thing not the kind of wedding you do infact I will suggest you do it quietly rather than blowing yourself out and started putting unecessary presure on yourself. Goodluck

The decision is between you and your husband and nothing is wrong with that.

i never really care about the whole big wedding thing, it could be done in 10mins for all i care, so trust me,  its not strange

The church wedding makes a difference.

@POSTER
Its ok if you do not have any thing hide and all parties concern
have no contrary view.This should be done with the interest of all not disadvantaged.
Best regards!

ah aya
how i wish my chick could reason the way you do, she said that her family is prominent, her sister got a befitting wedding and she must too, estimating the cost, i then asked her what will be a quota , she said ,i will do it all alone , if it cost me changing my job, all these cos some quarrelling. i am tired of her really. pls i just pray my chick could reason like you, let me do the wedding small and in our anniversary it will be great. 0h girl dont let any disway u, just allow your man to decide

stanbiggi:

ah aya
how i wish my chick could reason the way you do, she said that her family is prominent, her sister got a befitting wedding and she must too, estimating the cost, i then asked her what will be a quota , she said ,i will do it all alone , if it cost me changing my job, all these cos some quarrelling. i am tired of her really. pls i just pray my chick could reason like you, let me do the wedding small and in our anniversary it will be great. 0h girl dont let any disway u, just allow your man to decide

Well if her family is prominent, then they should have money now, abi?
Cos as far as I know, im most customs worldwide, the girls family arranges the wedding. The footing of the bill is optional. And if youre already tired now, then my friend getting married will only worsen it lol

that only will remember your marriage after one month, nobody thinks about it anymore after they finish your 'rice'

You need the church wedding ceremony than every other thing. Get the bllessing of the man of God and prayers of the Church, it does not cost you anything, moreso they are your witnesses. The reception is not compulsory. Don't feed the 'Town' when you can't feed your wife.
When couple are preparing for their wedding, wht are they really running about for? The Wedding dress, to pay the Church or the cost to feed crowd (alias reception)? your guese is as good as mine!!

Marriage is just parent consent and officiated joining in the presence of witnesses. shikena!! every other thing is man-made jara/extra.

Those advising you to avoid church wedding don't want you properly marry. Simple. But they want you to have a party, how doyou see that? Hypocrites whowould use the sae issue to yab you in the future that you did 'kangaroo' wedding, you ran from church, you did backyard marriage or just 'kolombo into a man's house'!!! beware.

Do your wedding but you can cut your cost by combing your intro and raditional with the Church blessing into Friday - saurday affair, without reception or get people to serve light refereshment at the church there while you are go to your home thereafter. The church ceremony does not cost you anything farding.

Moreso, I fear men who run away from their wedding responsibility. That is the only way you can be a man. only beware of your expenses, don't do copy copy and marry in your on condition as long as your spouse has agreed to live with you wether you are rich or not and you secure the parent's consent, you are done.
A Pastor once said a man who took a fine lady to keep in his house and is not ready to give a thank you token (bride price) to the parents is like a thief who saw fine banana in th market and stole it. Fulfil your responsibilities albeit at a doable cost (you can negotiate yor bride price but give something if you truly apprecite the lady). Men who run from such are most likelyto be those who stole certificates without attending school, bribe to get job without working for it, or just go to the office to get salary they did not earn, they are not trustworthy.

I always like to advise women, marrythe man only if he is ready to see your parents, strive to fulfil the bride rites (whether cheap or not, it does'nt have to be expensive) and ready just follow the normal process of marriage. That is a man. Don't marry a "Boy-yo-yo' who will get you toay and may never value you again after a while because you made yourself so cheap, nomatter how much that guy ad spent for you personally before then.

By Cheap I don't mean the amount involved but the sincerity of purpose in ensuring process is clear. don't follow all this system of dodging a process. Dodging the process makes you cheap

babe this is not strange but you must have a hidden motive for this decision.

Go with your heart there is absolutely nothing wrong if you decide not to go for a church wedding,however i"ll encourage you to gofor a

marriage blessing after your court or traditional wedding or years latter when you are fully settled into your marriage.

Folks do strange things. It takes one person to start.Then they stop being strange.

@uplawal
being a fanatic at anything is hypocrisy
and thats why jesus came, the jew then that muha whatever took stole their form of worship and impose it on the arab nation at the time by sword was one vagabond that escaped being punished for his wrong deeds.
but later came like up with some politically oriented spiritual bruhaha.
if you know what i mean.
we know all this things but JESUS said leave the thorn{weed} and the crop to grow
together there is such day as a day of reckoning that JEHOVAH would separate the weed{thorn} from the plants {crops}.
cos men u guys are thorns in our flesh.

do u know the History of islam?
please find out how muhamad came up with that fake immitation of the jews religion.?

you must not do a flamboyant church wedding, it can be a marriage blessing ie inviting God into your new family to take control, there is nothing special about the crowd and wedding gown.

Me no gbadu "church" wedding

Its not strange girl, I want the same thing. Just let them know that this is what works for you. My sister hate me for this, they do all the big wedding stuff and i just dont care but they will have to respect my wishes and my pocket

People are entitled 2 their opinion,and their wishes & choice should be respected.Wedding in the church isn't so strange, it's has been from time immemorial.It's just to present urself to GOD on a new journey you are embarking on.Mind you, it mustn't be flambouyant.But can be low key depending on your resources.CHEERS!!

Ben-10:

The church wedding makes a difference.

How? Enlighten me.

Its sad to see that people have become so brainwashed that they have not even choosen to consider:

1. Why they do what they do.
2. Why they choose to want what they want.

As far as the bible is concerned, I can't really think of a place in the bible that talks about church wedding. Even the bible talks about a wedding that the Messiah Himself attended. The bible did not talk about whether or not the Messiah was the one that officiated at the wedding.

One of the problems that i know I am going to face as a guy is that:

I do not want church wedding, hence its going to be very had to find a woman who is enlightened and not brainwashed enough to understand my reasons and choice.

Its ok to not want a big assed wedding with 500 guests. Personally I want a very quiet wedding with family and very few friends.

kindly stop making threads for thread-making-sake!

Nope at all it isnt. In fact all u need is ur parents consent n prayer and then a pastor's blessing as God's servant. Only Nigerians take this wedding thing 2 far.

bluntpis:

Nope at all it isnt. In fact all u need is your parents consent n prayer and then a pastor's blessing as God's servant. Only Nigerians take this wedding thing 2 far.

1. Kindly show me a place in the bible that talks about the pastors blessing.

FL Gators:

kindly stop making threads for thread-making-sake!

Na fight ! pesin come NL dey ask for advice ,u say she dey make thread for making sake . . . .dat's bad.Yousef open one na,if e easy to dey senseless
If you no fit tell am gud thing,nor talk nao
Abi you want make dem make you moderator cos he be like say na only senseless thread you dey alwaz see for NL oo.

rita@NL:

Na fight ! pesin come NL dey ask for advice ,u say she dey make thread for making sake . . . .dat's bad.Yousef open one na,if e easy to dey senseless
If you no fit tell am gud thing,nor talk nao
Abi you want make dem make you moderator cos he be like say na only senseless thread you dey alwaz see for NL oo.

lmao

@topic

The truth is that most people are suffering from western brainwashing and crowd mentality, hence most ladies and a few guys get so hung up on a so called "church wedding" merely based on the fact that others have done it and are doing it, and not really on any sound biblical or cultural or historical basis.

1. You do not need to go to church before you are considered married as far as the Creator is concerned.
2. You do not need the Pastor's blessing before you are married.
3. Being married has nothing to do with your Pastor.
4. Seeking Pastor's blessing is a sideeffect and symptom of the heresy brought into the church via the heretic church known as the Catholic Church.
5. Joseph and Mary did not go to church to get married.
6. I do not know of any passage in the bible that sanctions going to church for a so called wedding.
7. Being free and redeemed is not just a slogan, its a way of life, and hence it would do a lot of people a lot of good to actually question their actions and see whether it is biblical or not.
8. As far as I know, I have not seen anywhere in the bible that says people should get married in the church.
9. As far as I know, I have not seen anywhere in the bible that says people should seek Pastor's blessing during marriage.



All i know from the bible is that both families (parents to be exact) need to sanction the marriage otherwise as far as the bible precedents is concerned, the marriage is not really valid.

No2Atheism:

@topic
The truth is that most people are suffering from western brainwashing and crowd mentality, hence most ladies and a few guys get so hung up on a so called "church wedding" merely based on the fact that others have done it and are doing it, and not really on any sound biblical or cultural or historical basis.
1. You do not need to go to church before you are considered married as far as the Creator is concerned.
2. You do not need the Pastor's blessing before you are married.
3. Being married has nothing to do with your Pastor.
4. Seeking Pastor's blessing is a sideeffect and symptom of the heresy brought into the church via the heretic church known as the Catholic Church.
5. Joseph and Mary did not go to church to get married.
6. I do not know of any passage in the bible that sanctions going to church for a so called wedding.
7. Being free and redeemed is not just a slogan, its a way of life, and hence it would do a lot of people a lot of good to actually question their actions and see whether it is biblical or not.
8. As far as I know, I have not seen anywhere in the bible that says people should get married in the church.
9. As far as I know, I have not seen anywhere in the bible that says people should seek Pastor's blessing during marriage.

All i know from the bible is that both families (parents to be exact) need to sanction the marriage otherwise as far as the bible precedents is concerned, the marriage is not really valid.

Oh yessir!

No2Atheism:

@topic

The truth is that most people are suffering from western brainwashing and crowd mentality, hence most ladies and a few guys get so hung up on a so called "church wedding" merely based on the fact that others have done it and are doing it, and not really on any sound biblical or cultural or historical basis.

It isn't about "western brainwashing"; in true African tradition, a tiny aspect of Western culture is adopted and taken as the standard for what is perceived to be Western.

How often do you see Westerners having big weddings with 500+ people in attendance?  The majority have strictly controlled numbers, your father's friend from school and his entire clan cannot just show up.  Many people even opt for registry weddings and tend to have small numbers - by and large people go for what they can accommodate/afford.  I even know of one man who got a Pastor he knew to conduct the marriage ceremony.  He wasn't a churchgoer, the pastor was a neighbour and had befriended him some time before.  The only people in attendance apart from the bride and groom were two friends and the pastor.  Nowadays people are even opting for destination weddings because it's less expensive and significantly cuts down the guest list!

Apart from that, I'm in agreement with much of what you have said.  A church wedding or pastor's blessing is no guarantee to the longevity of a marriage.