I have discovered that love doesn't guarantee the success of a relationship. Love cannot help you stick to one person all year round, and on the other hand, cheating isn't always a product of not loving your partner. In fact, loving someone doesn't guarantee not falling in love with someone else.

Relationships work out mostly because of our head not our heart. It works out because of our emotional maturity, empathetic intelligence and self discipline because, time will come when you'll see more beautiful, handsome, romantic, intelligent, sexy, rich, curvy and God fearing people than the one you're in a relationship with.

In those times, love will not help you; self control will help you, emotional intelligence will come to your rescue and commitment will keep you going. With those characteristics, no matter how you feel for someone else, the person you're committed to will rank first in your life.

You think happily married people don't see better people than the ones they married? You think they don't feel funny sometimes? You think they don't catch feelings? They do!

But understanding that commitment is greater than feelings is the great arsenal that do destroy that impulse.

You can fall in love with anyone, but building a relationship takes absolutely more than what attracted you to them and takes more than love.

We are too fond of loving when it's convenient and sweet. We are too fond of loving when love is there but that can only last for just the first 3-6 months of the relationship. After then, you'll realise that the feelings have dropped, it's now your responsibility to make it work, not love's responsibility.

Relationships cannot be readymade. You have to build it and it's never always about love, it requires commitment and intelligence. On the long run in marriages, it's not just love that keeps them together forever, it's determination and commitment.

Everyone falls in love; it takes little or no effort to do that. But staying in love? Building a relationship? Only the strong and committed ones do that.

That's why we must find that one person and commit to that one, discipline yourself and bridle your emotions.

Building a relationship is hard work, it's like building a career, It's like pursuing a dream. It's always tough, at some point it will be so bitter but you can make it work by putting your heads together, you can scale through the trying time by being focus and committed.

The kind of love that attracts two people together is not the kind of love that will keep them together. Be emotionally strong and be self disciplined!.

Sticking to one person is not natural, you must develop yourself to do that. It works great and perfect with people of like minds, people of the same beliefs and people that share the same school of thought..

Errmm i only read the first paragraph sha bhet because you are a gooner, ah wee help you call Lalasticlala to move this great piece to frontpage

Love ain't just a feeling....Feelings and butterflies in the stomach come and go...... YOU HAVE SAID IT ALL.

Came to register my name

..........if this thread can be rolled into a joint, I would smoke it to ashes 'cause that's some real good shitzs you just pulled up there

Well said.

Disclaimer: i don't smoke nor am I supporting recreational drugs.

Ok

I love your write up
thumbs up

lilyqueen:
I love your write up

thumbs up

Most of what was stated are quite true and applies in majority of cases because true love is so lacking these days and where it even comes up it is hardly equally mutual. People now use their heads than their hearts.
However the entire statement to me undermines the power of true love where it exists mutually. Though it also depends on the extent of the love.
.Generally it's a great write up.

A nice piece.....







I didn't read it all sha

karacta1:

Most of what was stated are quite true and applies in majority of cases because true love is so lacking these days and where it even comes up it is hardly equally mutual. People now use their heads than their hearts.
However the entire statement to me undermines the power of true love where it exists mutually. Though it also depends on the extent of the love.
.Generally it's a great write up.

I agree with you but true love doesn't exist in our generation

lilyqueen:




I agree with you but true love doesn't exist in our generation

It does my lady and that is one thing i know you truly deserve and know God will make it happen.
Never lose focus on God, who you are, your guiding principles and your vision and you shall find true love.
#Lilyqueen4TrueLOVE.
I am already loving you and that is true love yet i know you deserve much more than i can offer.
True love shall cover you, follow you, and surround you all the days of your life IJN.

karacta1:

It does my lady and that is one thing i know you truly deserve and know God will make it happen.
Never lose focus on God, who you are, your guiding principles and your vision and you shall find true love.
#Lilyqueen4TrueLOVE.
I am already loving you and that is true love yet i know you deserve much more than i can offer.
True love shall cover you, follow you, and surround you all the days of your life IJN.

Good one.

lilyqueen:




I agree with you but true love doesn't exist in our generation

It certainly does. The problem is that it is so rare and even when it comes, it is often one sided and seldom appreciated by the one being loved.
Pain, sorrow and misery is the end point.

refiner:
A nice piece.....







I didn't read it all sha

Hahahahaha, hope your eyes are getting better sha.

Sincere4u:

Hahahahaha, hope your eyes are getting better sha.

Enyaaaaah, it's obvious they haven't gotten better.

Falling in Love is not a decision but staying in love is a decision.

karacta1:

Enyaaaaah, it's obvious they haven't gotten better.

Exactly. i felt so sorry for mentioning it. Some things are better not reminded of.
Her sight could still get better depending on the cause meanwhile she's got glasses to keep her going.

karacta1:

It does my lady and that is one thing i know you truly deserve and know God will make it happen.
Never lose focus on God, who you are, your guiding principles and your vision and you shall find true love.
#Lilyqueen4TrueLOVE.
I am already loving you and that is true love yet i know you deserve much more than i can offer.
True love shall cover you, follow you, and surround you all the days of your life IJN.

Thanks so much for your concern

REMAIN BLESS

lilyqueen:



Thanks so much for your concern

REMAIN BLESS

It's my pleasure my Queenest Queen.
I feel privileged meeting or knowing you.
You've been kinder to me than Sincere4u.
I wish you more divine blessings. May the Lord grant you all your heart's desires in life and make your wishes come true.

karacta1:

It's my pleasure my Queenest Queen.
I feel privileged meeting or knowing you.
You've been kinder to me than Sincere4u.
I wish you more divine blessings. May the Lord grant you all your heart's desires in life and make your wishes come true.

Na wetin i do you!?.

Nice one

Sincere4u:

Na wetin i do you!?.

Nothing guy. Was just making a comparison based entirely on my feelings.

karacta1:

Nothing guy. Was just making a comparison based entirely on me feelings.

See your life?. How can you make a comparison between a pretty lady and a guy based on your feelings and think you won't be biased?.

Sincere4u:

See your life?. How can you be making a comparison between a pretty lady and a guy based on your feelings and think you won't be biased?.

karacta1:

Ok oo, i once left this forum last year. Circumstances forced my to return to nairaland lately. One day i shall leave for good.

Sincere4u:

Ok oo, i once left this forum last year. Circumstances forced my to return to nairaland lately. One day i shall leave for good.

Heeeeeeeghh, no be so now, person no dey joke with you?.
If you leave i leave. Got better things to do than staying.
What exactly made you leave last year?.

karacta1:

Heeeeeeeghh, no be so now, person no dey joke with you?.
If you leave i leave. Got better things to do than staying.
What exactly made you leave last year?.

You are too inquisitive.
ok let's put it this way. you never know if you will continue on nairaland till you find love. Women have a way of changing your entire life when they come into your life.
Find love, marry, and you may never think of nairaland again though this doesn't happen to everybody.
I know of a friend from school. After graduation we both lived together in this city for a while.
During that period i was busy trying to make money while he was busy facebooking and nairalanding. I viewed his interests in disgust. Felt he was just wasting his time on social media at a time he should be busy making cash.
Today he is happily married and with two twin boys.
Last time we met i told him about nairaland and was shocked to find him trying Really Hard to remember what nairaland was. What was even most surprising is that he failed to recall even after i tried helping him remember!.

Alondra:
Falling in Love is not a decision but staying in love is a decision.

.
i really don't know the extent to which staying in love is a decision. People fall in love and can't let go even if they wanted to.

Sincere4u:
.
i really don't know the extent to which staying in love is a decision. People fall in love and can't let go even if they wanted to.

Do they really not let go? Moving on is letting go. Show we a Person who is down due to love and I will show you an obsessed one. Staying in love is deciding never to hurt the one you claim to love.

Alondra:
Do they really not let go? Moving on is letting go. Show we a Person who is down due to love and I will show you an obsessed one. Staying in love is deciding never to hurt the one you claim to love.

Yeah, moving on is letting go but people often prefer to stay if they could help it. If things are right people won't move on and that is a reason i still think staying in love is more of the love bond that makes two become one, than a mere personal decision. I am talking about the love where you even decide to leave and you find out you simply can't walk away. The person hurts but letting go is difficult and comes with emotional trauma. In this kind of relationship, if things are right, you find out that staying isn't just by mere decision but by a binding force. That force i understand to be the power of love.
Hurting the one you love by our actions and words is inevitable but often not intentional. Dialogue is key in resolving issues besides love covers multitudes of wrongs.
I do rather tie obsession to lust than love.

op op op bravo to you but love is in 2 stages. love can be jst an affection towards someone you wanna spend the rest of your life with,at the beginning,that is the first stage. The 2nd stage is that when you are committed to ur luv affair maybe after gettin married,and you still love ur partner,but you have seen better people than your partner but you still hanged on to him/her then love becomes a decision

Sincere4u:

You are too inquisitive.
ok let's put it this way. you never know if you will continue on nairaland till you find love. Women have a way of changing your entire life when they come into your life.
Find love, marry, and you may never think of nairaland again though this doesn't happen to everybody.
I know of a friend from school. After graduation we both lived together in this city for a while.
During that period i was busy trying to make money while he was busy facebooking and nairalanding. I viewed his interests with disgust. Felt he was just wasting his time on social media at a time he should be busy making cash.
Today he is happily married and with two twin boys.
Last time we met i told him about nairaland and was shocked to find him trying Really Hard to remember what nairaland was. What was even most surprising is that he failed to recall even after i tried helping him remember!.

Hmmmmmm
Interesting but oga you are trying to dodge the crux of my question.
What exactly made you exit from nairaland last year and for how long?.