Lilyqueeny:




It's possible my best friend loves someone else

loves who?.

Simply because the partners refuse (out of ignorance) to check their zodiac compatibility.

If you check the Zodiac compatibility of your partner to be, you'll know if your union will remain strong or fall by the wayside in shambles

Tajbol4splend:
I have seen people who claimed to be in love with themselves before marriage but you see them having a lot of disputes after getting married, I ask myself why this should be, I ask if it is still the same two people who used to do things together, who used to show love in different ways, all of a sudden at the time when the love is supposed to be at climax, they start having problems they never used to have before marriage, things then change, they then change.

Well what I think that causes this is that most people in relationships don't pay attention to necessary details about their partners.

Nairaland veterans and geniuses over to you, what do you think brings this bitterness into marriage between two people who have claimed to be lovers before their marriage

A lot of people don't realize that marriage is a lot of hard work and it take more than love to make things work, commitment, resilience, forgiveness, patience etc are all important ingredients that have to be cooked with love to make marriage work. The problem is too many kids are getting married today, anyone that can give up their right for the happiness of their spouse is not ready for marriage.

Sincere4u:
loves who?.

why do you want to know?

Tajbol4splend:


Dude right now I'm gonna tell u sth about me, it turns me off to read post of plenty lines but when I saw the number of likes you got, I felt it must be worth it, I read it and I'm really impressed, I think I learned something in it too, you make perfect sense.

Eeeehyah!! Thank you very much bros

Jammiiee:
I had no option than round ur 199 likes to 200 n ur 19 shares to 20. Ko kpe gerege u've said it all

I hail you brother.. Happy Sunday

Missonas:

Lemme add. God is love. When you love God He puts the right love in your heart which makes u do everything out of love. So theres hardly any room for bad vibes it will come most definitely (trials) but u'll surpass em and grow together. God/Man/ Woman #inthatorder

Thank you ọ jare.

Mediapace:


Nice and inspirational boss man

My biggest boss of life

Lilyqueeny:



why do you want to know?

cos i care

ReneeNuttall:


cohabiting is a sin remember?

lol, don't you think it'll help solve the problem at hand?

u are d best_,u are not married but d way u buttress this topic I think you have said it all..

Earth2Metahuman:
actually yes I can.

Those who don't live with their boyfriends, do you know how actively they have sex?

Infact, I prefer someone who had lived with 3 different guy all her life to someone who only visits, fhuck actively with different guys.

Atleast he bleeped 3 guys within the period of 7years and not 20 guys in 2 years.

I guess you are far from getting married. Your ideas are in based and unfounded. When your time comes, pray and choose wisely.

The scenario above is about a thrice divorced lady. The probability of her divorcing you is more than 80%.

What you need is an all-round matured lady (I assume you are an all round matured man) for a successful marriage.

Interestingly, ability to perform extremely well sexual wise isn't important for a good marriage (ask some of our popular celebrities).

Marriages crash when one or both parties in a marriage relationship are immature.

Maturity isn't a function of Age!

sheeda995:

Thanks sir,but what of acts done as a result of the situation, for instance one feels weak and thus become lazy, can one call that ones habit?

Not at all ma, only when it's consistent does it become an habit, like he claims to be tired Everytime, even if he's always tired sincerely, a considerate guy won't be selfish, he'll help you sometimes.

gabicon:


anyone that can give up their right for the happiness of their spouse is not ready for marriage.

Can or can't?

zanga420:
lol, don't you think it'll help solve the problem at hand?

I wouldn't know that for sure,because I haven't done It before.

tosyne2much:
Though, I'm not married neither am I a relationship expert but I think I can answer this question... As per say me sef no be small pikin again nah

Well, I think people go into marriage for ridiculous reasons (boobs, size of joystick, curves, 6packs, bedmatic skills, money, tendency to travel abroad, etc), and also with hopes and expectations of how they've always pictured the flawlessness of marriage on Nollywood and Phillipines movies; how people describe the beauty of marriage, and how they've been fantasizing the marriage of other people and thus, short of expections trigger disappointment, irritation, enmity and disinterest among couples.

Most people tend to overlook the flaws (ojukokoro, unforgiveness, nagging, adamant to correction, laziness, self centeredness, promiscuity, gold digging, tendency to become slay queens, lack of dress sense, lack of respect for your friends and family members, anger problem) of their partners during courtship and will take a bumpy ride into marriage with the ideology that marriage is a "magician" that completely changes or transforms people, without knowing that things sometimes do not happen that way... What you can't change at puberty, a mere RING cannot/may not change it.

Thats why it's said that LOVE is not enough to make someone your life partner, because there are other basic things that should be taken into considerations, and failure to do so makes your marriage vulnerable to chaos and abuse

When people get married, their eyes begin to open to reality after which they will get to realize that they ought to have married someone better, someone that will not hide her character at the expense of getting a RING. They begin to see some flaws in their partner which LOVE/INFATUATION blindfolded them from seeing during courtship

In a nutshell, marriage is an eye opener that opens your eyes from fairytale to reality.

This is not the matter of satan or witches and wizards in your village firing bow and arrow at you


I don't know if my comment makes any sense

bro I feel like crediting ur acc you u make sense God will nt tak wisdom away frm u

I love this thread.

Kentura:
lol.. after marriage, you'll realise you've just been scammed..

are u talkin frm experience

Marriage is about understand and sacrifice. No human being on earth is flawless.

tosyne2much:
Though, I'm not married neither am I a relationship expert but I think I can answer this question... As per say me sef no be small pikin again nah

Well, I think people go into marriage for ridiculous reasons (boobs, size of joystick, curves, 6packs, bedmatic skills, money, tendency to travel abroad, etc), and also with hopes and expectations of how they've always pictured the flawlessness of marriage on Nollywood and Phillipines movies; how people describe the beauty of marriage, and how they've been fantasizing the marriage of other people and thus, short of expections trigger disappointment, irritation, enmity and disinterest among couples.

Most people tend to overlook the flaws (ojukokoro, unforgiveness, nagging, adamant to correction, laziness, self centeredness, promiscuity, gold digging, tendency to become slay queens, lack of dress sense, lack of respect for your friends and family members, anger problem) of their partners during courtship and will take a bumpy ride into marriage with the ideology that marriage is a "magician" that completely changes or transforms people, without knowing that things sometimes do not happen that way... What you can't change at puberty, a mere RING cannot/may not change it.

Thats why it's said that LOVE is not enough to make someone your life partner, because there are other basic things that should be taken into considerations, and failure to do so makes your marriage vulnerable to chaos and abuse

When people get married, their eyes begin to open to reality after which they will get to realize that they ought to have married someone better, someone that will not hide her character at the expense of getting a RING. They begin to see some flaws in their partner which LOVE/INFATUATION blindfolded them from seeing during courtship

In a nutshell, marriage is an eye opener that opens your eyes from fairytale to reality.

This is not the matter of satan or witches and wizards in your village firing bow and arrow at you


I don't know if my comment makes any sense

UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS of MARRIAGE is the reason why people change.

YourImaginaryBF:
They say not the lack of love but the lack of friendship makes marriages unhappy.

You got the entire gist right dear. I listened to a man of God sometime ago saying he has spent 59 years with his wife but still finds it difficult to describe her behaviors/personalities atimes.

I think companionship & friendship outweighs Love in a relationship. Sex tends to diminish on the longrun as eating the same soup becomes nauseating.

A good companionship is exciting & intriguing especially when your companion is not with you at the moment. It makes u wanna have a daily communication with the other persons cos he or she, spark u up .

For me personally there are only two constants in a successful relationship/marriage and it's loyalty and friendship. Love is a choice, it's important but friendship and loyalty will get u through any difficulty. Marriage requires maturity and lots of tolerance. Your spouse could be having a rough day at the office and takes it out on you. You have to be able to understand them and find out the reason WHY they re acting out before taking any action. Most issues in marriages are mostly little issues that could be worked out but one partner refuses to forgive or wants to teach the other spouse a lesson and in so doing starts a chain of events that lead to irreconcilable differences. Forgiveness and understanding in marriage go hand in hand... Most times ur spouse could point out a behaviour you have that he or she doesn't like, it's very easy to over look this and say "that's how I am" the partner begins to resent you and gradually pull away. Communication is key for any marriage to work. People should learn to actually talk about issues. If your wife is angry with you, most times its not because you went out with the boys on Friday, It could be that you didn't pick up the kids early and the school called her which makes her look like a bad mother who forgets her kids, but the guy ll interpret it as she is nagging, and policing me, doesn't want me to hang out with my guys on Fridays. Little issues like this could be resolved easily if both partners can see things from the other person's point of view. Lastly there are several things I can tolerate in marriage but a partner who lies is totally unacceptable.

ReneeNuttall:



I wouldn't know that for sure,because I haven't done It before.

as per our subject matter, it can help. At least some percentage of the deceit.

zanga420:
as per our subject matter, it can help. At least some percentage of the deceit.

Maybe,just maybe.

Galacious1:
exactly. It's always good for intending couple to live 2geda for awhile before getting married. Just saying.

You are on point...this is exactly the reason some ladies would insist on no sex before marriage cuz there are some traits in them they don't want you to discover


marriage with such people is deceit upon deceit which would eventually leeds to divorce

.

Tajbol4splend:


Can or can't?

Sorry typo can't

ReneeNuttall:



Maybe,just maybe.

Yeah maybe cos not seen any better idea to it so far

Lilyqueeny:






I'm not an expert so I don't really know the right answer to this question.


I think it's better for someone to marry one's best friend .

hmmmm

The lady you dated/courted isn't the same person you married and vice versa. Adapting to the change is usually not easy but when you look at those before you that stayed married, then you'll find strength knowing that nothing is impossible.

5Kay:
I think the reasons why THINGS change in marriages most times is because they fail to understand the underlisted factors;

Uniqueness of individual characters, poor communication pattern, withheld emotional expressions, disparity in priorities, unnoticed dissimilarities in personality traits, differences in tolerance levels, pride/ego issues blinded by the eagerness to marry, and maturity level (note; age and maturity isn’t the same) to mention a chunk.

Now, to handle these, one needs to be ready emotionally, mentally/psychologically, financially (at least have an understanding of the role it'll play before and after the kids), also, look out for or HAVE these kindness with humility, sacrifice without expectations, forgiveness regardless of who's wrong or right, apologies without pride, unselfish interests to mention a few.

These among many are the basics of true friendship and a lasting marriage. With total commitment from both parties even when issues abound (they will) resolution will be easy.

I like your diction bro

dabrightt:
bro I feel like crediting ur acc you u make sense God will nt tak wisdom away frm u

Thanks brother

tosyne2much:
Thanks brother

You no say "amen" to the prayer.....

God was included ooo