SirMichael1:


Don't do it too much and get conc. acid poured on you while sleeping o.

Tread with caution.... Make your case no enter FP on NL with topic "A nairalander gets poured with acid" or something like that.

NoFavors:
Òrò di ghunnn, órò pesi jè ooo

Thegoodlord:
Bro, drug goes with almost all that but she denied that aspect. Did abortion only once after secondary school. Did she tell me All?

moorevic:

Micheal that's totally wrong, you may push her to her limit and remember she's changing because this dope guy.
So OP don't test her because the devil you don't know in her maybe a Leviathan.

BlackDBagba:
Never tell a guy any secret!!!

We will ALWAYS use it against you.

Bros, that chic opened up to you. Count yourself lucky. Most are living with prostitutes. Who confesses until they are caught in the act ?

Thegoodlord:
Bro you funny. My case is different

2016 winners theme.

This is 2017 bro. Your case was different.

I'm out!

Thegoodlord:
I'm not battling with the thought she's bad, I'm battling with the shock cos it's still fresh bro.

ztapi:
funny...what if she was "perfect" today and then tommorrow, say, after 5 years of marriage she starts taking drugs and blowing joints?what would you do then?people change, tommorrow isnt guaranteed, you should appreciate them when they are making concious efforts to be better but if you just cant cope walk away for sake of peace

NairalandCS:


Smoke a joint with her bro.

Thegoodlord:
She's ready to learn. One good quality abt her I love.

Thegoodlord:
What do u mean it doesn't change anything about her?

dnoable08:
I even thought u were going to say she confessed she was a slut who did series of abortion.
Baba u no get problem

BlackDBagba:
Never tell a guy any secret!!!

We will ALWAYS use it against you.

Bros, that chic opened up to you. Count yourself lucky. Most are living with prostitutes. Who confesses until they are caught in the act ?

malton:


If I talk wetin dey my mind sha, u fit leave her cos of am.

Thegoodlord:
I met this girl I loved so much. We started dating. I was very sincere to her and told her all about my past too and my present job and all. Initially she thought I was not serious but as time goes on, she discovered I was serious and was ready to marry her.
She's a very humble girl and ready to learn cos I discovered so many of her weaknesses and was putting her through rigorous training like making sure she reads to build her IQ. She was really responding so much and was happy and thanking me for making her discover her inner beauty.
The whole process made her to love me now like she's crazy.
But on Monday she told me the shock of my life. She told me she has smoked before. I thought maybe she has tasted cigarette before. She told me that she started smoking weed right from secondary school SS2. With her present age, she has smoked for 8 cool years and non is cigarette but weed(ibo) and Coddein and Tablets.
She told me all and also told me she stopped smoking last year but took Coddein last two months. That cos of my sincerity, she don't do them anymore that it was her past. oga smoking weed doesnt make her a devil mbok
I've given her book to read so as to help her think right and truly she confessed that the book did her lots of good and was thanking me for making her a changed girl. Plus the rigorous fasting she has done lately too by her ownself just to draw closer to God. In fact the lady is a nice and willing to learn and respectful person other than others I've met.
But since Monday, my head is full of thoughts.
I still love her but one part of my thought is scared cos of fear of the unknown tomorrow.
Please what do I do. I love her and I'm scared too cos I don't know the level of damage the drugs has done on her.
Don't mind my English. I'm good at other things I do. Lol

Thegoodlord:
Bro, go ahead. I'm all ears

malton:


Don't mind me.

Truth is,

Smoking weed is not bad in itself, IMHO. However, those smoking cliques usually gang-fu#k, with the guys taking turns on the ladies one after the other.

This isn't to say that her gang was like that. But that's how they operate, especially when high.

I know this for a fact, especially the secondary school kind.

It's all in the past, but I'll advise that you do some health checkups together before you proceed.

If all checks out fine, you can go ahead and wife her.

Who are we to judge?

Mine is just a cautious approach.

Thegoodlord:
Sure, I will definitely do routine medical check up on her before anything else. You're not far from the truth either. She really bleeped during those periods just for the fun of it. Now she has changed and me got plenty work to do to be sure.

bellyjean:
Bro. I appreciate you man.

Many guys here are just viewing this from the lady's perspective and are being sympathetic and apologetic; "oh she's changed", "she is willing to learn and change", "she sees you as her pillar"etc etc.
These are good qualities a guy would always want to see in his lady. But marriage transcends all these.

From a christain's perspective in which Jesus' model of a marriage should be our yardstick. Amongst all these "GOOD" and "WONDERFUL" qualities your babe has, I think what you should look out for is her love for Jesus christ and how she feels about doing God's will even when she goes down emotionally, spiritually or even when she is tempted to take some 'shots' of drugs. How willing is she to yielding herself to the expression of Holyspirit in her. You should have a glimpse of this from the joint devotions you have, the time you guys spend together to study the word of God.

My friend, any worthwhile relationship is a long walk and with God at the centre of your relationship, you will enjoy life.

My dear OP. You have done what a gentle man should do. God bless you for that. I trust you didn't base your relationship on sex and other frivolities.

Don't be decieved, there is no angel among we humans, but we can strive towards that perfection as commanded by God. A commenter said she sees you as her pillar. Walk her through the right paths, encourage her in the lord, the two of you should attend christain conferences that will help both of you grow, let her trust you. Be her shield.

But, the real question, which I should have asked before writing this long epistle is are you being led by the Holy Spirit into this relationship? And if so, do you truly know what LOVE means?

Answer this and you have your answer.

Thegoodlord=57106079:
The relationship has been a no sex one from day one. I just finished a dry fasting then and prayed intensely that God revealId this girl to me cos I do have this inner witness that there is something she is not telling me. That same evening I finished and called her, she now made those confessions to my shock. The things of God she's a novice but very willing to learn.
Let me tell me one thing I discovered about marriage. God can never choose a wife for anyone. But the greatest prayer is for God to reveal who your partner is and after that, the whole option is left for you to choose.
For instance, I had this girl initially before this one, I prayed and God showed me where we married but she got diabetics in future and I was not happy in the marriage. Through inner witness, the Holy Spirit told me that I've been shown the barrier ahead, but to marry her or not is entirely my own to choose cos as soon as I marry her, if I ever treat her bad...God won't be happy with me... So I withdrew. Now this one is entirely my decision again to choose.
This scripture holds me down...

1Co 7:12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
1Co 7:13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
1Co 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such [cases]: but God hath called us to peace.


Then this one is the key testing me betwixt two options...

*1Co 7:16 For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save [thy] husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save [thy] wife?*

bellyjean:


Bro, I thank God for your conviction and your strong faith.

The bible says we live by faith and not by sight. She can be woman/wife if you are willing to invest in her spiritual growth.

She loves you and you love her. Well, this is only the starting point. Let your love be guided by christ's love. You will have to be paitient with her. You will have to be tolerant. Don't ever remind her of where she is coming from. You have to be very alert to this. Whenever u quarrel, pls don't bring her past into it. Remind her of God's love towards her.

I don't know how long you guys have been dating and if you have even transitioned into courtship, but I will suggest that you delay any marraige plans for now (if there isn't too much pressure on both of u sha). As I said earlier, invest in her spiritual growth and if eventually for some other reasons you guys seperated, she would be better than she met you and of course you would be better afterwards.

Trust me it will not be a jolly ride all through. But note that marriage is meant to be enjoyed and not endured. And ultimately, prepare you both for eternity. I would love to hear good testimonies about how God helped both of you made your relationship work.

You can check some of pastor Godman Akinlabi's teaching on marriage and relationships on youtube.

TapTapTap:
People that do drugs are not bad people. Btw u don't like smokers and she decided to stop for u and she even came out and was sincere. I think u found urself a good one tho