yettymuse:
until you walk the walk, not everyone would understand this statement. I'm glad you and ex are coparenting in peace. I wish you both all the best

Oyindidi:
Wow! Just wow! Some of us are really strong not even health challenge can break us.

Risingphoenix12:

Not sure i understand your comment

annex1:
Okay we are on abduction now.

For how long was she taken? How did she survive without her medications. Did she not have any medical emergencies?

This whole story; Fictitious or not. is beyond me.

jashar:
Is this a movie script or real life something?

sisisioge:
Wowzerful! Just like that? Now my fear of marriage just increased! It is well.

sisisioge:
Wowzerful! Just like that? Now my fear of marriage just increased! It is well.

bobobooge:


Sisi you have emphasized severally when searching for partners to share an accommodation that you can cope and live with individuals with loose screws in their heads.

Were you lying?

sisisioge:




Them sha no be my husband. I fit leave them alone and mind my business but can't leave my husband alone nau. His business becomes my business...may God keep me and mine away from unscrewed nutts.

sisisioge:
Wowzerful! Just like that? Now my fear of marriage just increased! It is well.

Risingphoenix12:
Well.. well.. well...how time flies....

Its been about 18months or so since i started this journal (i think). Final judgement at the court is scheduled to be delivered in about 2 weeks. Interestingly, my ex and I seem to have developed a decent relationship, with mutual respect. The kids come over to my apartment from time to time, spend weekends etc.. and we reinforce each other's instructions. I attend activities at my kids school, as much as i can. I'm not complaining. I sincerely believe the divorce was the best decision for both of us. Though, the side glances from people when they hear you are divorced can be unsettling. lol.

One thing this process has taught me is never be judgemental about others. Everyone has a deeper inner struggle. Live and let live. Like my mom says, "Life is a mystery"

To those who are yet to be married, be circumspect... dont manage anybody oh... i would advise marrying someone you are willing to "die" for. The future is pregnant with positive vibes, dont miss out on it

sisisioge:
Wowzerful! Just like that? Now my fear of marriage just increased! It is well.

ImaIma1:


Marriage itself is a mystery. And you are right about getting married for the right reasons...not for riches, out of pity, good looks, etc. Because sooner rather than later, all that will fade away and we might have nothing to fall back on.

Judging is a very dangerous thing to do. And people do it so easily. That's why I always say "never say never".

Hope you recover just fine and adjust to your new status. And do not make the same mistake again because to stumble twice on the same stone is a proverbial disgrace. .

ImaIma1:


Marriage itself is a mystery. And you are right about getting married for the right reasons...not for riches, out of pity, good looks, etc. Because sooner rather than later, all that will fade away and we might have nothing to fall back on.

Judging is a very dangerous thing to do. And people do it so easily. That's why I always say "never say never".

Hope you recover just fine and adjust to your new status. And do not make the same mistake again because to stumble twice on the same stone is a proverbial disgrace. .

mrsthang:
@risingphoenix12

It must be some relief that it's over and done with.

You both will deal with very strange feelings..grief even at the years lost.

I sometimes work with children & adults who's parents have divorced during the formative years,7 ish , it could cause lasting damage and trauma for them if not handled properly.

They describe pain and confusion,having to go to different houses,being used as pawns, sometimes even blaming themselves etc

Even when speaking to the adults,some regard it as a major incident in their lives.


I hope you both agree for this time to be as seamless as possible ,perhaps remain friendly for their sakes especially as it's not their fault.

For their mental health it is important that you both set aside your differences and parent together to the best of your ability.

They'll need lots of love, and reassurance and for you both to be on the same page so they feel emotionally secure.

Happier healthier parents in a happy environment is beneficial for children rather than a toxic environment so you both have taken the right steps hopefully to a more beautiful future .

It's not easy at all.

I wish you both all the best.

highcollide:
I watched my mum, an intelligent woman, endure hell in her marriage. She refused to leave because of her kids.

I pray to God to give me a good reason to get married. Life itself is full of difficulties. Marriage is difficult. Why would I want to indulge in another level of difficulty?

marriage makes little sense to me.

sisisioge:
Wowzerful! Just like that? Now my fear of marriage just increased! It is well.

missdee384:
please check Nkechi Bianze's page on facebook, she is currently posting testimonies on happy marriages, Prolly you might be encouraged.

sisisioge:



Thanks ...good to hear positivity in the institution.

Risingphoenix12:
Wow! How time flies. Reading through this journal just makes me realize that everything in life is transient. Mountains and Valleys, Ups and Downs etc. In all, one must remain thankful and always be positive.

Earlier this year (before the lockdown), I received a call in the wee hours of the morning. My children's mom (ex-wife) had a home accident, was taken to the hospital and had died. I jumped on the next available flight. I recall crying all the way from my apartment to the airport and on the plane. On one hand, it was such a personal loss - I ensured we remained cordial post-divorce. I had just attended our kids' christmas party at their school. I never reneged on my obligations and i always asked myself if i was doing right by her, which i always answered in the affirmative. So being informed of her demise was such a shock and a loss. On the other hand, i was thankful that i wasn't in the house when it happened, i can almost hear the stories and accusations flying... "pointing fingers at me". That would have just been another whirlwind.

Showing up was such a relief for my kids. That was (and still is) the most important thing on my mind. With wisdom (thank God), I was able to get the kids to travel back with me to my base, got them enrolled in a new school and also have family support in raising them. They seem so much happier. Everytime i look at them, i realize how blessed I am. We discuss about their mom once in a while and i just check to see if they are well adjusted (thankfully, they are). It has been one heck of a journey. I can just imagine if this had happened during the lockdown, I would have been a nervous wreck!

Life can sometimes take us through turns that we never expected, but there is always light at the end of the tunnel. We just have to keep living, be positive and take it one step at a time. It is well.

Risingphoenix12:
Wow! How time flies. Reading through this journal just makes me realize that everything in life is transient. Mountains and Valleys, Ups and Downs etc. In all, one must remain thankful and always be positive.

Earlier this year (before the lockdown), I received a call in the wee hours of the morning. My children's mom (ex-wife) had a home accident, was taken to the hospital and had died. I jumped on the next available flight. I recall crying all the way from my apartment to the airport and on the plane. On one hand, it was such a personal loss - I ensured we remained cordial post-divorce. I had just attended our kids' christmas party at their school. I never reneged on my obligations and i always asked myself if i was doing right by her, which i always answered in the affirmative. So being informed of her demise was such a shock and a loss. On the other hand, i was thankful that i wasn't in the house when it happened, i can almost hear the stories and accusations flying... "pointing fingers at me". That would have just been another whirlwind.

Showing up was such a relief for my kids. That was (and still is) the most important thing on my mind. With wisdom (thank God), I was able to get the kids to travel back with me to my base, got them enrolled in a new school and also have family support in raising them. They seem so much happier. Everytime i look at them, i realize how blessed I am. We discuss about their mom once in a while and i just check to see if they are well adjusted (thankfully, they are). It has been one heck of a journey. I can just imagine if this had happened during the lockdown, I would have been a nervous wreck!

Life can sometimes take us through turns that we never expected, but there is always light at the end of the tunnel. We just have to keep living, be positive and take it one step at a time. It is well.

ibizgirl:
Sorry about this. Thank God your kids are adjusting