justwise:

I'm not in anyway saying that there are not SOME Nigerian men making fool of themselves but my prob with that post is the level of generalisation, men cheat as well as women, i hate it with perfect hatred when pple can not treat others as individuals. Clinton cheated in office, does that make ALL American men a cheat? Tiger Woods beded how many women? How about John Terry, Ashely Cole, Wayne rooney, frank Lampard. . the list go on . .does that make all engish football players a cheat? My issue with you is that you directed her to that topic knowiing fully well what the topic was alll about. Your freedom of speech stops where mine starts, its not freedom of speech anymore when i'm called names for doing nothing wrong

hmm but what if the number of nigerian men who cheat, lie and mistreat women outnumber the ones who dont?
many of the women on those posts seem to have very similar stories which follow a similar pattern - is that pure coincidence?
of course noone is saying that cheating is an exclusive preserve of nigerian men, ALL men cheat, we know that, however there is a tendency in cultures where women have less equality with men to regard cheating as more acceptable, in the west however it is generally frowned upon and in addition married men in the west who cheat stand to loose a lot - their home, 50% of their income and in some cases access to their children.

you cant pick and choose what you think should be free speech, you either accept that we live in a democratic country that permits free speech or you go and live in a totalitarian state where your every move is monitored and controlled.

cap28:

hmm but what if the number of nigerian men who cheat, lie and mistreat women outnumber the ones who dont?many of the women on those postsseem to have very similar stories which follow a similar pattern - is that pure coincidence? of course noone is saying that cheating is an exclusive preserve of nigerian men, ALL men cheat, we know that, however there is a tendency in cultures where women have less equality with men to regard cheating as more acceptable, in the west however it is generally frowned upon and in addition married men in the west who cheat stand to loose a lot - their home, 50% of their income and in some cases access to their children. you cant pick and choose what you think should be free speech, you either accept that we live in a democratic country that permits free speech or you go and live in a totalitarian state where your every move is monitored and controlled.

Could it also be that some of those stories are made up? Have you thought of that? Have you heard from those men accused? Men who loose 50% of their income are the rich ones, there are many weekend-dadies who got nothing to loose, women don't bother reporting them cos they got nothing to give.
How many Nigerian men have those women slept with b4 reaching that conclusion? Is not just right to paint ALL Nigerian men with the same brush.

for all these foreign women dating a nigerian man advice threads, one of the most important info's needed from d threadstarters b4 any logical answer can be given on if u're being played or not is: your age; the guy's age; if you've been married before n have kids already(and yea, it has got a whole lot to do with what you asked), and if possible your pic (sounds like too much, but wit all dis info one might be in a better position to atleast start in trying to answer your question or better yet, wont even need a background story to do dat)
[quote][/quote]

He is 34 and I am 39. I have been married before and have one son. I have been single by choice for five years. My pic is on my profile.



wat i dont get is why your the only one calling?? is he in nigeria and you somewhere else??

neways if your no longer feelin the relationship u can talk abt it and if things dont change. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Hi, I am calling him cos i have free international minutes on my phone plan. He is in Malaysia for the past 6 months and i am in Australia. Yes that is my profile pic, why?? I am interested to hear your thoughts.

cap28:

@tink_sh is this your first relationship with a nigerian man? if yes i think you should read some of the comments on this site:

http://www.topix.com/forum/world/nigeria/T6MAVH1UFMVFA7K69

Yes this is my first relationship with a Nigerian man or any man outside of a white aussie.

Tink_sh:

Yes this is my first relationship with a Nigerian man or any man outside of a white aussie.

then i would advise that you proceed with extreme caution as the majority of nigerian men born and bred in nigeria rarely seek serious relationships with non nigerian women, there is usually an ulterior motive which you may not discover until its too late. i posted the link just to give you an idea of some experiences that other non nigerian women have had with nigerian men outside nigeria.

cap28, Thanks for your time. I am proceeding in caution cos i have a child to consider and my son is my first priority. I have been single for so long cos i wanted to focus on raising my son right and not have men in and out of his life but thought i would take a chance with this guy but am trying to be careful. It is difficult cos i have asked a lot of questions that go unanswered so thats why i came on here, to see if i can learn anything. But my eyes and ears are wide open. I would love to relax and enjoy the ride but have to protect my son in case it falls apart.

cap28:

then i would advise that you proceed with extreme caution as the majority of nigerian men born and bred in nigeria rarely seek serious relationships with non nigerian women, there is usually an ulterior motive which you may not discover until its too late. i posted the link just to give you an idea of some experiences that other non nigerian women have had with nigerian men outside nigeria.

You are just spreading misleading information, when you posted that link i knew that you got an issue with Nigerian men. What you said above proved me right, there is no bases for your comment, just what you read from SOME faceless women online, u can not based your unfounded judgement on hear-say. Tell me this if those women are wonderful and all the faults are from the Nigerian men why are their men(white) not all over them?
You read some comment from some disgruntled women and rushed to conclusion that Majority of Nigerian men are like that, i would like to know where your from.

kaiiii

as cap did make a serious generalisation but ill advise the poster to follow it

u cant trust most of the men comin from nigeria

trust me - its better to be safe than sorry

if u must date a ngerian try one that grew uop abroad

at least most of them dont have serious dead people in the closet!!

ayettymama:

kaiiii
as cap did make a serious generalisation but ill advise the poster to follow it
u cant trust most of the men comin from nigeria
trust me - its better to be safe than sorry
if u must date a ngerian try one that grew uop abroad

at least most of them dont have serious dead people in the closet!!

From experience? I grew up in Nigeria and find this comment insulting, been here in the UK for quite a while now and can't understand where you lot are coming from.

Poster,

yes like what some posters said here. Hustle means to find money. He has to be a man to find money which might be the cause of his busy schedule lately and hardly finding time for you.

And no, the tribe or culture or a person has nothing to do with this.

I guess all you have to do is that if you are not happy with what he is doing to you or the way he is behaving, tell him what you told us exactly and come to terms with him. Communication is very essential in this time of need

ayettymama:

kaiiii

as cap did make a serious generalisation but ill advise the poster to follow it

u cant trust most of the men comin from nigeria

trust me - its better to be safe than sorry

if u must date a ngerian try one that grew uop abroad

at least most of them dont have serious dead people in the closet!!

Oh noo, for this I have to disagree with you. Ive met many many Nigerian men despite to the fact that I am in malaysia, there happen to be many Nigerian men here and truth be told, as famous as they are for cheating, scamming, lying, drinking and fighting. . . . Well, not all are like that. Ive met quite a number of Nigerian men whom is basically the good guy type whom doesnt commit into this kinda acteven if they have to die. They put their trust in God and they believe they will be a better day for them so nope, no all Nigerians are like that.

im sure weve alreadi had the men in the uk argument b4??

abeg u guys should search for it

im not bothered!!

^^ Abeg oo sista, no vex.

ayettymama:

im sure weve alreadi had the men in the uk argument b4??

abeg u guys should search for it

im not bothered!!

Oh well. . . . .

justwise:

You are just spreading misleading information, when you posted that link i knew that you got an issue with Nigerian men. What you said above proved me right, there is no bases for your comment, just what you read from SOME faceless women online, u can not based your unfounded judgement on hear-say. Tell me this if those women are wonderful and all the faults are from the Nigerian men why are their men(white) not all over them?
You read some comment from some disgruntled women and rushed to conclusion that Majority of Nigerian men are like that, i would like to know where your from.

Justwise - can i ask you why directing someone who has never dated nigerian men to a forum with discussions   of experiences by mainly non nigerian women is as you say "misleading information" if you were about to embark on a relationship with a national of a country you had no prior knowledge or experience of, surely you would be curious to know what sort of track record people from that country have in terms of relationships with foreigners ?  would you jump blindly into a relationship with someone from a completely different culture without consulting other people who are more familiar with those people and that culture? 

well,  this is what ive done,  the poster has come on here asking for info on a person that they are interested in getting to know and i have furnished them with what i beleive is helpful and useful information.  it may not necessarily be positive information but it is helpful and useful.  why is that difficult for you to accept and why do you perceive that as me having an axe to grind with nigerian guys, as i have mentioned above i am a nigerian guy myself, however i have spent most of my life in europe and america.   

you say that what i said above is based on comments made by "faceless disgruntled women" who may be lying - thats true but they may also be telling the truth, why are you so willing to dismiss them as liars but so willing to give the guys the benefit of the truth even though they too are "faceless"?  am i alone in thinking that you are applying a double standard here?

snowdrops:
How does Yoruba fit into this story

its the main attraction.

Tinksh:


I dont think i went on about it, i just mentioned it in case it was important. I am trying to learn so i understand better. It was an innocent addition so there isnt a need to have a go at me. If you dont want to help me thats fine, thats all you needed to say.

No mind doze igbo boys.


He needs to hustle means he doesn't have time for a serious relationship as he still wants to make money and run through women.

If you're looking for a man to settle down with, it's not him.

This is an honest Yoruba man who sees no prospects in you and has told you so.


Thank me later or not at all.

Tinksh:
cap28, Thanks for your time. I am proceeding in caution cos i have a child to consider and my son is my first priority. I have been single for so long cos i wanted to focus on raising my son right and not have men in and out of his life but thought i would take a chance with this guy but am trying to be careful. It is difficult cos i have asked a lot of questions that go unanswered so thats why i came on here, to see if i can learn anything. But my eyes and ears are wide open. I would love to relax and enjoy the ride but have to protect my son in case it falls apart.

Hi, I know this thread is super old but I see Ur still active on NL n just wondered how Ur relationship turned out