@ vpg

u well deserved it stealing from d old nautie child

VPG:

I remembered when I was in Pry 3 my late grandma use to give me pocket money for lunch everyday before leaving for school. One day I was roaming around her room and discovered a box filled with money so every morning i will sneak into her room while she's making breakfast for me to take to school and help myself with some of the cash then turn around and ask her for lunch money. I was living large, big boy on campus. This went on for 3 weeks and finally the money in the box finished. Business as usual she was making breakfast i went into her room and found out that my treasure box is empty but no shakins i still gat the grandma lunch money to collect, when the school bus arrived i started looking at her and of cos she was looking at me too i was thinking in my head is this woman forgetting something. Then she smiled and said my husband there is a box in my room where i kept your lunch money for the school year go there and get it. The next pocket money i gat from her was when i gat admitted into secondary school.

LOL. Very wise grandma. So it's not only by beating that a kid is disciplined. Three years without pocket money from your loving grandma is surely a great lesson learned .

I was a tomboy too and mostly kept to myself.For some reason,I always counted my steps at age 8 and if I miss counted,I'll start all over again and when walking on tiles,I'll select the tiles I walk on.
I hated eba and I would throw balls of eba behind our food cupboard in the kitchen.My mom had a hard time trying to get old eba out of that place.
I also remember my junior years in secondary school,I used to fein sickness within seconds before the labour bell went off.Once I couldn't escape and my group was required to push the dump by the girl's hostel and when the senior supervising us wasn't looking,I and a couple of my friends dashed into the bush by the girl's hostel.You should understand that I have a strong fear of snakes but I dreaded pushing that dump more because there was all sorts of "things" in there,remember it's a girl's hostel dump,

lol.ah nairalanders u wont kill me.see evry poster i really salute u.i can't just resist d water frm my eyes while laughing.infact everybody u ar too much or let me say ten much.i av many experience too.let me just share dis.wen i was 2yrs.my mom took me 2 d hospital&she was bin giving a drug.i went to her room while she was busy atendin 2 a visitor,climb d table&drank d swt drug meant 4 2wks.unable 2 get down frm d table,i started crying.

AYODEJI4LOVE:

lol.ah nairalanders u wont kill me.see evry poster i really salute u.i can't just resist d water frm my eyes while laughing.infact everybody u ar too much or let me say ten much.i av many experience too.let me just share dis.wen i was 2yrs.my mom took me 2 d hospital&she was bin giving a drug.i went to her room while she was busy atendin 2 a visitor,climb d table&drank d swt drug meant 4 2wks.unable 2 get down frm d table,i started crying.

that one na serious overdose .

i remember this story of a woman also.she visited one of her frnd who was sellin cloth then wit her small daughter.the woman later decide the give her friend daughter a big pant'd pant been 2 big the woman decide to put it on on d second day.in the market her daughter shouted,dat her mom should remove her shirt,that she want to check if is her pant.come see great shame that day.

adetoru:

I was a tomboy too and mostly kept to myself.For some reason,I always counted my steps at age 8 and if I miss counted,I'll start all over again and when walking on tiles,I'll select the tiles I walk on.

Funny, i used to do something like that, well, when ever I was walking behind any one on the street, I would imitate their steps, ie, walk with left when they walk with left, then follow with their right etc. Very annoying I'm sure .

climb d cupboard and carry a whole bottle of phenegan syrup and drink,

den non alcohol wine we called it baby wine my baby brother den he was i fink 6 or 7 took one and the half bottle of wine and slept for almost a day and he actually taught he drank baby wine

was a tomboy as well chei d way we pulled crazy stunts until one day i fell into cacutus plant and my brothers bike broke into 2,

used play football so much until one fateful day our stupid house boi decided to fire one wicked hot shot like dat to my chest and i had just started growing breast painful cant even describe since den not even tried playin ball till date

my brother used to suck his finger my dad wld ask him wats in dis finger ur sucking d boi wld say honey or sugar, and also as if the boi nos wen his goin fall down he wldnt let let dat particular finger touch the ground

some visitors wen dey come visiting our parents if we dont like dem we hide their shoes or put excessive salt and pepper in their food or lie to our folks dere s nufin in the house

The only crazy thing I remember doing as a kid was shoplifting

shilling:

The only crazy thing I remember doing as a kid was shoplifting

anini sister!

na2day?:

[b]anini [/b]sister!

What on earth is that?

shilling:

What on earth is that?

ANINI was a Notorious Armed Robber

Oh, okay.

shilling:

Oh, okay.

for denying a family member u must kneel down and raise up ur legs!

adetoru:

I was a tomboy too and mostly kept to myself.For some reason,I always counted my steps at age 8 and if I miss counted,I'll start all over again and when walking on tiles,I'll select the tiles I walk on.

Lol i still do that till now, when im in some waiting room or something. i hate to sit down and wait, so i pace.

kk, crazy thing i did when i was young, lol. Im the first born so i dont really have much of these to share,was quite resposible as a kid, plus my head was always stuck in a book (was an avid reader since pry skul). Back then, when i was like, 7, my mum used to let i and my brother watch movies, no matter how adult rated they were-she prolly thought we were too young to know what they were doing. All was good until my uncle's girlfriend came to visit him one day. They locked the door, and i, the aproko, went to peep thru the key hole. Lo and behold! they were lying on top each other on the bed!! i ran to call my brother to watch with me. "Bobo, come and see, Uncle Ifeanyi is doin that thing that they used to do on tv, that thing they used to do on the bed" We were so excited we got iron cups, placed it on the door and put our ears on it to really hear what was being said lol.  when it got too steamy for us to stay still, we ran to call our housegirl at the time (she was a fellow conspirator who used to do freaky thing then to amuse us, like swallowing a mango seed whole and regurgitating it) to come and watch too. she thought we were joking till she reached the door. By this time, my uncle and the girlfriend were already in seventh heaven, so she didnt even have to go too near to get what was goin on. Interestingly, She just turned on us and started shouting! " you these children!! you've  become bad o!! im goin to report you to your mother!!" we begged and begged that day ehn, to no avail. that day my mother drove us to hell and back with that cane. after each round she'l run the cane under our noses and shout, "what do you smell!!!" Needless to say, we were never allowed to watch movies again in that house, only disney animation, till today

na2day?:

for denying a family member u must kneel down and raise up your legs!

Ok now, time to let it go.

chei, all of una no fit kill me o!!!

this is my story: a young lady used to pass in front of our house daily. my big uncles would always tell us to shout at her 'HOW MARKET!!!' we didn't know what that meant, but she got the message and my uncles knew what they were saying. apparently they were calling her prostitute and that how was her biz for the day. the day she turned back at us and gave us the beating of our lives, i can't forget

2. growing up, hunting was my hobby. bush burning was our major too. we almost burnt down houses. the the main gist was that of a day that we chased a small rat into a hole, after digging the hole, we found like 4 bigger rat hiding in thesame hole!!!! it was meat galore!!!

3. we went snail hunting once. my elder brother hijacked all we got, cooked it, then gave us two pieces each while he eat like 30 pieces. he ended up with an allergic reaction and he was taken to the hospital. since then, nobody shared our snail with us.

shilling:



Ok now, time to let it go.

but u have to serve ur purnishment first nau

Am a gentle but highly mischievous kid. I have friends that we do nigga together. I would arrive church for choir practice of 6pm before 5pm, but will be playing ball with other kids behind the church till 6.30pm. I will be punished as late comer but will still repeat the same thing next time.

I have a friend I used to play ball in their house before going home everyday. So one day, my mother said I should go home to do some stuff. I was happy because it is another opportunity to play again. On getting there, other kids were waiting for me, I told them I am in hurry, but they persuaded me to play just one set, which I did. Guess what, we won all other set, so each time I want to go they would persuade me again, till my cloth was so dirty. I was really sweating. Eventually I left them when someone kicked the ball into the next compound.

The real drama happened when I was going home. I wanted to run home to cover the time wasted, can you imagine, I didn't know when I passed beside my mother . I just heard someone screamed my name Tope eeeee!!!! Mennn I was scared, surprised, afraid, See they way I ran like 3km home, She did not beat me but I felt guilty.

Guess what the next day I still stopped there to play again,

Being a kid is really CRAZY

I have so many crazy things i did as a child but one stays so fresh in my brain, i remember it so well in vivid details. my mum loved to make salad and she used to put a lot of boiled eggs in it. so one very beautiful day she made the salad as usual and put it in the salad plate and put it in the fridge, as soon as she left the kitchen i tip- toed to the fridge and opened the salad plate to steal some egg yolk, (no picture two flat plates on top of each other, skillfully put in by mother in a rack way above my head) i stood on my toes and raised the plate, the next thing i heard was the plate crash landing on the floor, omo i could not leave the kitchen , my mum heard the sound and came running, of course i was already crying she did not beat me , she said the shame of being caught in the act was enough beating and she told every one about it plus my dad who always felt i was the cool one.

Then there was this other one , but it was a collaborative effort from my two older siblings,my mum had a stock of her mum's ( my grandma's) clothing in a closet upstairs.my mum lost her mum when she was 18yrs and she treated those clothes like a heirloom.unbeknown to me and my siblings, we would go there everyday and pick a wrapper tie it to the bunk beds in our rooms and make a hammock out of it, each of us would take turns at rocking in it until the wrapper got torn, we went on like that for weeks until we nearly exhausted my grandma's clothes and then found something else to do with our time, weeks later my mum went into the closet and found torn wrappers, she called everyone upstairs and asked who the culprits was/were, my siblings and i started looking at each other, my mum just started moving closer towards us slapped my brother and kicked him ( as a rule my mum never bought a cane, anything she says is an instrument of beating) my brother bore all our sins that day for days he did not play with us.


Another time like that , my mum had just given birth to my younger sister and there was plenty of cow and gate in the house. ( in that same store where my mum kept her mum's clothes) my self and my elder sister would go in there, lock ourselves in and lick cow and gate milk to stupor, one day my elder sister was sleeping so i sneaked in to go and lick milk on my own. i locked the door and licked the milk as soon as i was done, i opened the door and lo and behold i met my mum in front of the door , my habds were soiled with milk and mouth was covered in same, all i wanted was to be swallowed by the ground under my foot, needless to say i nearly died from the beating.

dis is a very funny thread, i could recall mine as well,there was a day i and my friend went to lagos island in other for him to buy his technical drawing board and some other items for his school assignment.after doing Aroro @ d place.i told my friend to let us check out some cloth at mandelas.on our way to d place.along tom jone roundabout, we saw this gamblers parked their vechicle and started calling pple to play d lottery .crash n win.my friend said we shuld not answer them but me then being very sturborn.nothing dey happen.we have close N30k thereabout on us.na so we branch d place o.d guy dat approach us has igbo accent, trust me as yoruba boy.i said nothing dey happen that igbo man go dupe me inside island, after d scratchin of d paper,, he said i don win dvd and friend won a tv, dat we can decided to sell it there or take it home, nah so i told d guy dat he shuld us give us money oooo.he said no dat we will have to pay 3k each b4 any thing can cme out, i told my friend 2 give money dat he can't try rubbish wit us.after givin d guy money abt N15k.he said guy u no win anythin dat we can try n play another one, he b lik say i won crazy 4 there, immediately i began to unbotting my dress lik say i won fight d guy, has i was try 2 halla 4 d guy, na so one guy wee all him face don tear wit cutlass show 4 my back say u want to fight abi, fear cash me no b small.my friend that is an ishekri dat his yoruba accent no dey flow well too won try to dey speak yoruba, immediately dis guy gave my friend slap at his neck.my friend ran towards oluwole, me still dey try form alaye boy.i still dey open my chest.dis guy gave me hot slap 4 chest i bottin up immediately, see beating of life dat day, na so i go call one of my sister shop guy.be say nah island boy, as we reach d place back na so we see one guy wen big pass all of us dem dey trash dis guy too, o boy na N20 remain 4 my hand as i reach house i began 2 dey cry, such his history shaa.

DEELOV:

dis is a very funny thread, i could recall mine as well,there was a day i and my friend went to lagos island in other for him to buy his technical drawing board and some other items for his school assignment.after doing Aroro @ d place.i told my friend to let us check out some cloth at mandelas.on our way to d place.along tom jone roundabout, we saw this gamblers parked their vechicle and started calling pple to play d lottery .crash n win.my friend said we shuld not answer them but me then being very sturborn.nothing dey happen.we have close N30k thereabout on us.na so we branch d place o.d guy dat approach us has igbo accent, trust me as yoruba boy.i said nothing dey happen that igbo man go dupe me inside island, after d scratchin of d paper,, he said i don win dvd and friend won a tv, dat we can decided to sell it there or take it home, nah so i told d guy dat he shuld us give us money oooo.he said no dat we will have to pay 3k each b4 any thing can cme out, i told my friend 2 give money dat he can't try rubbish wit us.after givin d guy money abt N15k.he said guy u no win anythin dat we can try n play another one, he b lik say i won crazy 4 there, immediately i began to unbotting my dress lik say i won fight d guy, has i was try 2 halla 4 d guy, na so one guy wee all him face don tear wit cutlass show 4 my back say u want to fight abi, fear cash me no b small.my friend that is an ishekri dat his yoruba accent no dey flow well too won try to dey speak yoruba, immediately dis guy gave my friend slap at his neck.my friend ran towards oluwole, me still dey try form alaye boy.i still dey open my chest.dis guy gave me hot slap 4 chest i bottin up immediately, see beating of life dat day, na so i go call one of my sister shop guy.be say nah island boy, as we reach d place back na so we see one guy wen big pass all of us dem dey trash dis guy too, o boy na N20 remain 4 my hand as i reach house i began 2 dey cry, such his history shaa.

;DAlaye ko, agboki ni

LOL

@poster

I remember oneday when we were kids and my mom was preparing lunch a lil late, my big bro started crying that he was hungry and all moms plea for him to be patient fell on deaf ears. So, she offered to give him biscuits but he rejected and said he wanted drinking garri with sugar and smoked fish. Mom told him to take just a little so he can have room for lunch but he refused again and so she soked 3 cups of garri for him and added enough sugar and gave him a big piece of fish the boy was so happy and started eating half way through he said he was tired but mom said no you must finish it come see crying and drinking garri na. After that, he never complained of hunger when food is cooking

Imagine, dis thread funny so tey since morning I never do any work for my desk today. I have so many of my childhood acts that I will be unleashing:

The ones I can still remember very well happened in Primary 4, my eldest sister was in JSS3. Mumsy just bought her a wrist watch the previous day and because she was rushing to school she forgot it at home. I decided to take it to school and borrowed one of my female classmates. When I got home, I saw her reporting the incident to mumsy so I had to report myself quickly. Unfortunately, I never knew where Naomi's house was so I had to walk round the area before getting someone who knows Naomi's house. On getting there I was told that she had gone to Kingdom Hall so I had to wait till she came back, collected the wrist watch before going home. I was much more fortunate because I really didn't get much beating because Mumsy pitied me that I had not eaten since morning.

Also in Primary 4, there was a day myself n 2 of my classmates went to pluck mangoes at my house during break time. On our way back to school, there was a drainage in front of my school dat was quite deep. One of my friends pushed me and I fell inside because I was scared to jump. Thank God for a man that was passing by and had to stand on some metal piece dat was hung in the drainage as steps to pull me out. I went back home and thank God our clothes were washed that morning and I was fortunate to have one of my oversized waist, undersized length blue shorts on the line to change to. My class teacher who was my neighbour flogged out the day light out of our heads that day but trust me, I was scared because I was thinking she was going to report me later that evening. Thank God she didn't.

When I was in primary 4 too, I had this unserious naughty boy in my class who would always advise me to go fishing from the drainage during school hours just because he knows I dare not after school hours. I remember the day we did Fine Arts examination in 3rd tern and no sooner had we started drawing the fish that he called me that he was going to submit because he was finished. I immediately submitted as well and when result came out I came 4th and the difference between myself and the person who came 3rd was just like 2 marks. I wept because I know my failure in fine arts attributed for this but I just couldn't tell my parents why I was crying.

Also in primary 4, there was a time I stole my partners ring cheese balls and for like 2 days will leave home without going to class. One day my new class teacher whose son was my friend asked them to come bring me to class which I obliged since those who came to catch me were more. maybe because I was guilty, I never felt scared of the beating I was to get though the woman was very good at flogging. However, on getting to class that day, she asked me to sit in front of her and placed a statue of Holy Mary beside the cross on her table and told me to confess telling me that I was before Holy Mary and Jesus. I still wonder each time I remember where the boldness to still lie in front of those sacred stuffs came from. Since I was smart to exonerate myself, I wasn't beating.

Another one that happened was in Primary 5, before then, I was the 1st class innocentee @ home. However, I used to steal money from my tenant because the woman has so much and trusted her daughters. Then my neighbour's son who was to resume @ one of the Unity schools in Ondo State was always coming with his mum to school. On one of those days during break, I bought Caprisonne for him and some other friends and when the primary 6 teacher saw him with it, he claimed I was the one who bought it for him. The woman claimed I must have stolen the money which I denied. She punished me and asked me to come back to come collect a letter for my parents. I kept praying she forgot and instead after closing hours, I did not go back to her and she never asked for me. Each time I remember, I feel glad because I know if my parents had got wind of it, I would have been beaten blue black by my overtly disciplined parents.

One of the days then in Primary 5, one of my neighbours complained of our playful character after school hours and came to tell my parents to put me in an evening lesson. Then I used to buy ofio to class and that usually distracted classmates. Despites the canings and punishments I got from our lesson teacher, I never changed my ways until one day I got a 2 week suspension. See my life outside, I don dey get suspended since primary school.

The lists are endless but let me pause for now.

I was in JS 3 and we just had my grandpa's burial, you know the yoruba stile, "Aso ebi". So the day after grandpa's burial, I, my friends and some of my cousins went to the stream "EVERY BODY IN ASO EBI". We had been warned never to swim in that stream again because some people used to fetch water from there, but you know teens.

So, as we were swimming i just heard one voice "Well done my Children". By the time i looked up, it turned out to be one elderly man, he was so popular in my town and everybody feared him. He was a notable leader of oro worshippers (dont know if he is still alive anyway). Sighting him with a cain I just screamed yeee. Everybody ran out of water, with only our panties on and we took to our heels. Meanwhile, we had hidden our clothes in the bush, unknown to all of us, one of my cousins headed to where we hid our clothes and carried them only for him to be intercepted by the man, the man shouted at him and out of fear he dropped the clothes. Practically naked, no boxer, no singlets but only panties, the man threatened to burn our clothes. We begged him but he would not listen

Suddenly, one of us brought a suggestion, someone should pretend he's dumb, while everybody prostrate, he should be mumbling perhaps the man would consider him and return our clothe. So, one of my cousin who is full of pranks started gesticulating and demonstrating as if he was truly dumb while we were all begging. ( I wish there was a video clips of the scenario). The man actually believed he was dump and even pitied him saying " E ma wo eleyi odi yi ti o nfarawe awon ti won pe, tomi ba fe gbe lo bawo ni awon eniyan yoo se gbo nkan ti on wi ( meaning look at this dump comparing himself with people who are complete and endangering his life, how can people hear him in case he's getting drowned and calls for help)but that would not make him return our clothes. This lasted for close to an hour, we were following the man and pleading.

As we got very close to town, we spotted a distant relation and we decided to engage him. He was a drummer and used to drum for the man during their festival; thus we were sure he would listen. Gues what? The one who pretended to be dump was the first to speak out " BABA E JOWO E BAWA BEWON KI WON FUN WA NI ASO WA" meaning, father please help us to beg him to give us our clothes. The man ( who had seized our clothes) could not believe as he exclaimed "IWO ODI, IWO ODI, ASE O LE SORO " (meaning you dump, you dump, so u can talK) Everybody bursted into laughter.

Anyway, we got our clothes but that did deter us, we kept going until some1 saw me and reported to mama. I got the beating of my life .

Aww, nice stories here.

As for me, I don't know where to start from loll!
BRB

Mine was in primary school,
I had a fight with my big brother, and he really beat the hell out of me, and I got so pissed off that I just went into his room, opened his wardrobe and tore all his clothes with razor, it dint take them long to figure out who did it, cos our elder sister was in Uni already and doesnt live at home and dad works out of town, so it was just me, him and mum, come and see beating, men i chop beating tire from my mum,  and when my dad came home for weekend see another round of beating, u go think say i steal for market ni,   And they went to change his whole wardrobe while i dint get to buy any cloth for a whole year, not even christmas clothes,


Another one
I was like 10-11, used to be a junior chorister, and there used to be this mean bros that was like 10yrs older than me. He was always beating us, so one day he started beating us again, na so my head just turn and it was a saturday preceeding palm sunday, so there were some palm fronds around, i just took one of them, and started  beating that bros and it was just like we planned it, others kids just joined me immediately, like 10 kids on one adult kai, the guy suffer hen!!!
And then he went to report to an elder and boy!! the elder made our day by his reply, the elder said :"have always warned you about the way you beat these kids, its true a bee is a small fly, but its sting is mighty" .

Here is my memorable childhood story:

I went to my maternal grandparents(in the village) for vacation after my third term in Primary 4. It was nice to play around unsupervised and without too many rules.

One day, I sat on a mattress(without cover) and played with matches. I made the lit matchsticks burn nice round holes on the mattress, was enjoying myself and counting the holes on the mattress. I was trying to find out how many holes I could create on the mattress when my grandparents called me from outside. They sent me on an errand. I came back and met people running helter skelter in our compound with plantain leaves and buckets of soapy water and fire in the part of the house that I was playing with matches.

My heart dropped. I had dropped a lit matchstick on the mattress in my haste. I can remember turning away from the house and running, running to wherever my legs took me. My legs took me to a primary school block. I couldn't bear the thought of what I have done. I stayed there until I became afraid of my surroundings in the evening and decided to go home, to face 'the music'.

I sneaked back to the house(it was still there - the villagers did a good job of putting off the fire) and hid. What saved me from the beatings of my life was that my grandparents were worried about me. They had searched the whole village for me after the incident. I came out from my hiding place after I heard them talking about sending somebody in the morning to get my parents. They were overjoyed to have me back and warned me never to play with matches again.

I remember this anytime I strike a matchstick  

ifedy:

Mine was in primary school,
I had a fight with my big brother, and he really beat the hell out of me, and I got so pissed off that I just went into his room, opened his wardrobe and tore all his clothes with razor, it dint take them long to figure out who did it, cos our elder sister was in Uni already and doesnt live at home and dad works out of town, so it was just me, him and mum, come and see beating, men i chop beating tire from my mum,  and when my dad came home for weekend see another round of beating, u go think say i steal for market ni,   And they went to change his whole wardrobe while i dint get to buy any cloth for a whole year, not even christmas clothes,

this one na pure wickedness from your part when u small.

honeric01:

this one na pure wickedness from your part when u small.

I refused to be blamed, u need to see the beating that day, it was like he was beating his mate and the guy is 10yrs older than me and am even a girl, i couldnt go to school the next day,

ifedy:

I refused to be blamed, u need to see the beating that day, it was like he was beating his mate and the guy is 10yrs older than me and am even a girl, i couldnt go to school the next day,

u see yourself, you are always fighting grown ups

honeric01:

u see yourself, you are always fighting grown ups

I know, I am kinda sturborn