@poster: She's simply a mannerless, uncultured chic, y should she create a scene cos some1 wants to talk 2 her. I wouldn't be ashamed if I was d one. I've not had any tho, I don't razzle babes, all I just need is her fone no. and some time, she'll be d one razzling me later. Haha! Seriously. Never push or rush a woman.

nice thread. me likey
too bad i wasn't really into girls back in d days and we simply don't do toasting dis dayz

My little cousin once composed two letters, one to his big bros to send him his pocket money and another to a new babe in his class, toasting her. He mistakenly put the adress of his big bros on the envelope for his girl and put the address of the girl on the envelpoe of his bros who is a born again. See serious family meeting that weekend!

rhymz:

OMG! I ve been lafin convulsively reading from one post to another. . .honestly, most of the funny posts feel me with a pang of nostalgia for my ol sec sch days in St Finbarr's College. . .I dont realy consider many of my experiences in wooing the opposite gender as embarassing per say. . . Though I went to an all boyz sec sch, I manage to somehow have many female friends, i had friends in many of the gals' sec sch in Yaba-Sabo Oyinbo and Surulere axis,from Anglican galz, QC, OLA, ISL,methodist girls,surulere gurls high sch to even Gideon in Okota. . One thing I learnt early abt wooing chicks is to have as many female friends as possible, that way they help U create avenues for getting their friends. Seriously, no gal likes to be around a guy that is hardly seen with a gal and very nice. . Hahahaha. . U will end up being their good friend and that is where it will end. . Hahahahaha. . However, i have had cause to be embarassed not by any cold response from the gal or a lack of what to say due to some adrenalin rush but the total lack of confidence in the gal I was toasting but that would be for my next posting. . Meanwhile make I laf. . .

Nice one though

J.Jay:

Where have i been?! Watching my dear team get knocked out. Well, its all good. I cant help but continue laffin about d experiences i've heard here. Keep it coming guys. D girls are shy to tell us about when they once freaked out.
@Cyberfreak, can u pls tell me? I'm referring to your last post.
@sofeco, guy why u dey drag cyberfreak with me na?

Me I no dey follow you drag her nah, but just the way u wanna get her looks somehow funny.

Keep ur ATM safe, websites are selling people's card details for less than $2,
myshopadmin.info,

Being a calm guy, I make friends with ladies to win their heart and it works like magic. As an amateur, I never got liver to toast in fact I hate it and my hommies never knew this. Baptism of fire came when I walked up to a lady back in 2001. She is one of the ladies on campus, probably not in good mood. I walked up to her and before I could say anything she screamed so loudly that I disappeared fast before people would know what happened. And ever since I AM PROUD TO SAY I AM A CONSULTANT

This happened some 3months back. I had just gotten off a six-month r/ship with dis gal and was in a hurry for another company. I went to visit another female friend in my ex's sch, there was sth she wanted me to do for her at the cafe so we went. While we were waiting in the crowded cafe to use any of the free system, i noticed this very fine gal sitting next to a lady who was probably typing her material for her. I moved close to where dis gal was,didn't say anything as I thought since I was standing it was pointless talking to her.Soon as the next user left his seat, i used my opportunity. I feigned and asked her: "mind if I sit down" acting all casual and friendly, she nodded her head in gesture to say no,I sat down.And without looking at her face i pointed to the computer screen and said: "is this Ur work?" she said yes! Then a conversation ensued, i just joked and said funny stuff to ease out the atmosphere but i noticed she gave very little response when i ask her questions cos in between the jokes I was getting my data on her. . . I didn't read any meaning to her unsual reticence but i suspected it was not natural either. I told her i would like for us to meet again, she gave her number. . Then after a day, I called her and noticed thesame shyness and inarticulate attitude especially when I speak english.Anyway, we arranged to meet an eatery but this time i decided to experiment, in order to make her more comfortable around me, i decided to speak only pidgeon english and occassional igbo since my igbo was not very good. O boy come see no holds bar, dis gal com dey gist, dey voice pass me oh all because I wont speak english, she even went to the extent of yapping my igbo when she is obviously lacking terribly in english. . Mehn I was kinda embarassed, i com dey reason stuf, how i wan take introduce dis kind chicks to my homeboys and their chickz. . Guy, dem go ridicule me die. . . Somehow i just did what I had to do, acted along and at the end, i kissed the idea good bye. . No matter how pretty a gal is, mehn if she cant express herself in simple english, i gatto ride on. .

@magnumshie huh? i presume that must have been the most embarrassing moment of your life  

@ poster, am so sorry abt your predicament.
Mine was @ nite sha, i stoped this hottie to have a word wit her and what she said was that if you don't get the Bleep off my back i will slap you.
I just respected my self and left.

[i][/i] Haahahhhahhhahhh lwkmd,heew u people wan kill I had to be cautioned am in the office and no one knows what am reading so i should lower my voice.
Back @ topic,ladies do have their embarassing moments too o especially if the guy too dey, if u know what i mean. Anyhooo i have my own experience too to share.
It was way back in the days there was this bloke on my street I fancy so much that each time we come in contact (passing by or buying stuff from the corner shops), my goes gbamgbam and wish he would just toast me there and then and my answer to d 'toasting' has been rehearsed in my head severally but omo boy no gree toast o.
Eventually,we exchanged pleasantries one day like that and he said there is something he will like to ask me. OMG dream coming true eventually,he said we should meet later on in d day.
I wore my best outfit,almost finished a can of perfume and even got there before him. When he eventually turned up, he asked if i've got the pacesetter novel-Wages of sin!!! To which I replied negative he thanked me and left, gaawwddd I nearly peed in my pant. I ended up hating him like shit and wouldnt even look in his direction anymore

^Alast! A sincere lady. Good. U for toast d guy. Who knows if he likes u but lack some courage.

babonboard:

[i][/i] Haahahhhahhhahhh lwkmd,heew u people wan kill I had to be cautioned am in the office and no one knows what am reading so i should lower my voice.
Back @ topic,ladies do have their embarassing moments too o especially if the guy too dey, if u know what i mean. Anyhooo i have my own experience too to share.
It was way back in the days there was this bloke on my street I fancy so much that each time we come in contact (passing by or buying stuff from the corner shops), my goes gbamgbam and wish he would just toast me there and then and my answer to d 'toasting' has been rehearsed in my head severally but omo boy no gree toast o.
Eventually,we exchanged pleasantries one day like that and he said there is something he will like to ask me. OMG dream coming true eventually,he said we should meet later on in d day.
I wore my best outfit,almost finished a can of perfume and even got there before him. When he eventually turned up, he asked if i've got the pacesetter novel-Wages of sin!!! To which I replied negative he thanked me and left, gaawwddd I nearly peed in my pant. I ended up hating him like poo and wouldnt even look in his direction anymore

Ah, I'm sure the guy's lyrics failed him too, the only thing is brain could tell him is "Do you have the pacesetter novel-wages of sin?" Damn!

@ J.J I wasnt preapred to toast him rather I have a ready made answer for his own toasting lollll

@Babonboard: Believe me, if d guy had posted here, he would have posted that experience as his most embarrassing toasting experience, lol. Pls find ur way back to him. He likes u as much as u do him. Just create an enabling environment for conversation. Ask d questions this time, he may be more inclined to talk. I wish u d best.

Mine was almost a decade ago, An 18 year-old WAEC candidate who needs extra classes in economics and mathematics was introduced to me by a neighbour.Seeing the way she looks,I offered to assist her without collecting any pay.I eventually taught her 5 subects of which she had 4 A's and 1 C in her WAEC exams,

I asked her out afterwards and she politely said no, I thought that was the end of it till she came some weeks later asking me to help her prepare for JAMB exams which is just 2 weeks away.I profess my love for her again and she said"I'll think about it and will write you when i take a decision".
JAMB came and gone still nothing, She went to check her results and still didnt come to see me or send someone to me.
Then one night, me and my family were all at home watching TV when she knocked on the door, Mum opened the door and she was ushered in into the house, She told everyone that she scored 248 in her JAMB, We were all happy for her but she sounds weak and retracted, While still jubilating,she suddenly fainted holding a LOVE LETTER,

Come see commotion, Mum and my younger ones were all trying to revive her while i stood aside too dazed and transfixed to do anything.When she was eventually revived,my mum took the letter from her hand and read the content loud enough for everybody(including our neighbours) to hear.It started with "dear xxxxx,I am happy to write you this letter because i am sure you love me as much as i love you", ,
My younger ones bursted out laughing while my mum said "soooo this is the result of your lessons"Why wont you faint if you spend your time writing such love letters, Mum still tease her about it till today.

@Olafolarin OMG, That was heeehhhheeehheee pls dont let me lose my job now lol so did u guys eventually dated abi una don marry now lolllll.
@J.J I wish could see him now, we lost contact when we moved out of the street. But seriously do u think he would have toasted me cos i really liked him then, maybe i should have given him a second chance pooor boy lol.Its all history now doh something to have good laugh about, xxxx

Babonboard, When he told u he'll like to see u later, didnt u think he could've asked u about d novel right then? He must have prepared his lines too for d 'd' day, lol. Too bad it all evaporated in a flash! U didnt help matters by freakin out too (believe me, u did). Well, he's past right now. But guys sef, cant we do better? Na wa o! lol

Mine happened when i was in SS1. I was the best toaster amongst my friends, gifted in the act of writing love letters, which i also do for commercial purposes.

We were having men talk when this girl i had been eyeing walked past. My friends asked me to go for the kill! I approached this girl in my short knicker and immediately my john bosco started to nudge, i had to put my hands in my pocket to contain it. Eventually, i heard myself saying “What will it cost you it i take few minutes of your precious time”, as soon as the girl replied “Silver & Gold” i just went blank, but sha we eventually dated and broke up, The rest is history.

@ Babonboard, We dated eventually and got married this January, My mum recount the incident on our traditional wedding day and you need to see the surprise on the face of my in-laws,

I am enjoying this thread and will be back to share mine

@olafolarin.
dts sooooooo romantic.

babonboard:

[i][/i]
It was way back in the days there was this bloke on my street I fancy so much that each time we come in contact (passing by or buying stuff from the corner shops), my goes gbamgbam and wish he would just toast me there and then and my answer to d 'toasting' has been rehearsed in my head severally but omo boy no gree toast o.
Eventually,we exchanged pleasantries one day like that and he said there is something he will like to ask me. OMG dream coming true eventually,he said we should meet later on in d day.
I wore my best outfit,almost finished a can of perfume and even got there before him. When he eventually turned up, he asked if i've got the pacesetter novel-Wages of sin!!! To which I replied negative he thanked me and left, gaawwddd I nearly peed in my pant. I ended up hating him like poo and wouldnt even look in his direction anymore

hang on. . . there may be a matching story soon

im not a regular poster but these, has got me cracking, been scowling all day and a staff enters and sees me laughing my head off and had to call another staff to ask me 'if i was ok', lol

@ olafolarin

the best so far , but why did she faint. or did she fake the fainting part?  

@ rhymz, nice one pal, had a very similar experience lately.
i was @ a restaurant not far from my office one early morning. met dis beautiful lady who was already having her b/fast. sat next to her, later started a conversation & we just got talking. all of a sudden, in d course of our brief discussion, maybe she got carried away,  she just switched into yoruba,    holy smoke!!,  i could barely understand, so all i did was just nod my head. i was so embarrassed!
don't get me wrong, i respect our local dialects, but d poor lady couldn't read my body language, dat i wasn't comfortable at all.
i just hurried my meal, got up & left, never asking 4 her name, let alone her digits,  it was really crazy  

all of a sudden, in d course of our brief discussion, maybe she got carried away, she just switched into yoruba, holy smoke!!, i could barely understand

I've seen this happen a few times (people talking and all of a sudden switching to Yoruba even though the other person doesnt speak the language).

i wonder why it happens.

It might be the person is somewhat nervous and subconsciously changes to the language they feel more comfortable with. Hispanics sometimes do it too.

quite puzzling.

hmmnnnnn,
that was a long time ago,
it was indeed my first and most embarrassing toasting experience
i'll spare you the details
only that i never got the girl and made a complete mess of myself

that's all folks,

Gentlebabs:

Mine happened when i was in SS1. I was the best toaster amongst my friends, gifted in the act of writing love letters, which i also do for commercial purposes.

We were having men talk when this girl i had been eyeing walked past. My friends asked me to go for the kill! I approached this girl in my short knicker and immediately my john bosco started to nudge,  i had to put my hands in my pocket to contain it. Eventually, i heard myself saying “What will it cost you it i take few minutes of your precious time”, as soon as the girl replied “Silver & Gold” i just went blank, but sha we eventually dated and broke up, The rest is history.

hahahahaha. . . O boy that thing dey do me too sometimes especially when the gurl is just too hot for me to handle. . . I remember one very fine yello hot opkekei for sch dis gal get bøbby and nyash, she come get one lipz like dat, anytime she rub am dis their wet lipz Oh boy, i find myself lukin at her in forgetfullness like a slowpoke, na so blood go just dey rush dey feel my kini. . Chai D day wey me and dis chic meet for park, she wan come give me 360 degree hug, noticing as kini dey sing kini bigdeal and halleluya na im i give her my side, making d hug a 180degree to save myself any further embarassment as my bulge been dey show through my pant trousserz. . Chai! Through out the convo we had, I was not myself, coz my hormones just de9 fail me in the wrong places. . My mouth and tongue come dry no be small, come see internal heat. . E come be like say d chick sef no wetin she dey do me coz she kept chatting me up and touching me here and there with her innocent gestures. . I hear nwee dat day. . .i no dey 4get that stuff. . As U just tell dis Ur tory na im d thing enta my head. . Hahahaha. . Dis woman game e no easy O. . No be everyday U go run into galz wey fit control Ur hormones like that. . Lol

All of una no get work or better thing to do.

Mine happened, when i waz in SS1 then. There is dis Charmin yellow paw-paw gal, wey i dey trip 4, of which her skool is vertically opp. my own house. because of ds gal i will leave my skool early by 2pm instead of 3pm jst to meet her, i did ds 4 lyk 3 days. i neva had d LIVER to approach her in d mist of her frndz, afta deir closin' tym around 3.30pm. Na so i go stand 4 front of ma house, look her walk out of her skool gate & leave.
So i decided to block her in her mum's shop, one saturday mornin' around 10am. Lucky me, i met her alone, i first buy Peak milk 1st. na so i start to dey yarn dis girl O! The nxt tin i go hear na, is it dat yu dnt av work or wat! if yu dnt leave ma shop, i wil shout thief on yu(In a loud voice),  b4 i knw all other pple 4rm oder shopz came out. lookin at me,  lyk say mak i enta ground. Thnk God say i look ground well well b4 i fly gutter,  infact i no evn rememba collect ma change. Since dat day i no dey gree pazz front of her shop. 4 vry long tym,

The things we have to put up with for these daughters of Eve!lol