Hello All,

I have a problem with cousin of mine. His name is Chinedu. The problem is that there was this lady that he claimed he loved so much [about 2 years ago]. He asked this lady to marry him 2 years ago, but after much much, the lady got married to another guy and had a girl-child. Now, the guy [her husband] died last November and has been buried.

The worst part of this story is that Chinedu, my brother is now well-to-do, and has still gone back to this lady, asking her to marry him.

I want to know what you people feel about this! I think my cousin is very stupid. If this girl liked him 2 years back, she would have married him, then why is he going back to her now.

My aunty [his mother], says otherwise. She supports her son in getting married to this lady, because [according to her, Chinedu was not too capable of raising a family 2 years back, that was why the girl did not marry him]. Therefore, now that he is financially stable, he can go back to the girl he really wants and get married to her.

Please you people should respond because I do not want Chinedu to marry her. Tell me the steps I can take to prevent my cousin from making this mistake.

Jojo

@ otuonye

it is such a good thing that you're looking out for your cousin, but if you're not careful you might end up loosing him forever

You've made your point clear, but if he's still bent on marrying her, then you might just have to step aside. He is an adult capable of making his own decisions, even if the decisions seems wrong to someone else. Its his life to live and you've done your part as a passer-by

Now what scares me is the fact that this lady might not love him as much as he loves her, afterall she did choose someone else over him, but it might be true that she didn't get married to him then for the reason your aunt gave, but that's something time will tell.

I've always believed that everything happens for a reason, could it be that they were actually meant to be? noone knows , only time will tell

But for the time being give him your 100% support now that he needs it most, be there for him even though you don't like his decision, you might later find out it wasn't a bad idea afterall

cute-ass:

@ otuonye

it is such a good thing that you're looking out for your cousin, but if you're not careful you might end up loosing him forever

You've made your point clear, but if he's still bent on marrying her, then you might just have to step aside. He is an adult capable of making his own decisions, even if the decisions seems wrong to someone else. Its his life to live and you've done your part as a passer-by

Now what scares me is the fact that this lady might not love him as much as he loves her, afterall she did choose someone else over him, but it might be true that she didn't get married to him then for the reason your aunt gave, but that's something time will tell.

I've always believed that everything happens for a reason, could it be that they were actually meant to be? noone knows , only time will tell

But for the time being give him your 100% support now that he needs it most, be there for him even though you don't like his decision, you might later find out it wasn't a bad idea afterall

Well, you have spoken well, cute-ass, but I still have my reservations on this. I have decided to calm down and watch them. If it works out for them, then it is ok, but if not, I will be very angry with him and he knows it.

otuonye:

Well, you have spoken well, cute-ass, but I still have my reservations on this. I have decided to calm down and watch them. If it works out for them, then it is ok, but if not, I will be very angry with him and he knows it.

now you talked well, like you said calm down, because if at the long run it works out and you were the only one againgst them, well i guess you know what they'll see you as ?? a home-breaker and an enemy of progress. You wouldn't want that, would you?


take care

Dont you want your cousin to be happy? He obviously like the girl thats why he's going back she's not forcing him back is he? Just make sure she likes your cousin too and be happy for them

Abeg no pour sand sand for him garri. let them be friends first, time will tell

_{cute-ass you really try o, you are everywhere in this romance forum! you be counsellor?}

LoverBwoy:


_{cute-ass you really try o, you are everywhere in this romance forum! you be counsellor?}

lol, you just made me laugh

but come to think of it, maybe i should have a change of course

Her being a widow is not the problem. If your sister becomes a widow, would you ask her to stay single forever?
The potential problem is that we're not sure about how this woman feels about your cousin. Why not find out?

i think you should let them be. NA you wan marry ya cousin? he insist that she's the woman of his dreams why do you want to stand in his way,your idea of an ideal wife is definitely not his. would you want leave your woman just because someone in you family does not see the same things you see in her.

Give them ur blessings and support and let them be. its ur cousin's life.

I understand what everyone is saying here. It's OK. I have decided not to bother myself on this issue again. Afterall, it is not my life to live. If Chinedu decides that it is the way he wants to live his life, that's his choice.

But honestly, I think he is making a serious mistake because I do not know whether this lady loves him as much he does. If Love is not mutual, it may fade away easily. Besides, I think it is better I have a woman who loved me when I was 'Nothing' than run to woman who is likely to love me for what I am right now. He is in the United States right now, and I wonder if all the beautiful 'untouched' women over there have finished, for him to come back to Naija because of this lady who rejected in 2004.

Furthermore, one more thing that bothers me is this: What happens to the baby this lady had in her previous marriage? I do not know if it will be right for my cousin to take responsibility for another man's seed.

Anyway, all the things I have said here are my personal findings. I am not going to bother him again on this issue. I wish him the best of luck. If he succeeds, 'GOODLUCK', but if he does not, please tell him that 'I WILL BE VERY ANGRY WITH HIM'.

Jojo

Chinedu should thread very carefully!

_{Whatever you guys say, he's gonna do wat he wants 'nuff said!}

ok. but what about the baby?

@topic u are a very horrible person, am very sorry to say what d hell is wrong with ur brother taken care of d lady child,what did d child do ?pls change ur ways and leave ur cuz to marry d lady are u 4 real? men u are a big nag