megareal:


Don't mind those quoting you. They are yet to understand that relationships are unique. I had only male friends before marriage. Hubby, then fiance use to come meet us where we were and give the guys drinks. They were there at my wedding and child dedication. We still talk but hardly meet. Infact I am still the refree in most of their relationship ish as it was before I married.

Hubby maintained his female friends too and as each of them married off, we will go to their weddings etc.

The problem I see with a lot of folks commenting is that sex to them is too cheap hence they think everyone indulges in it casually.

The sooner folks learn to control their libido the better trust will be established between both parties.

megareal:


Don't mind those quoting you. They are yet to understand that relationships are unique. I had only male friends before marriage. Hubby, then fiance use to come meet us where we were and give the guys drinks. They were there at my wedding and child dedication. We still talk but hardly meet. Infact I am still the refree in most of their relationship ish as it was before I married.

Hubby maintained his female friends too and as each of them married off, we will go to their weddings etc.

The problem I see with a lot of folks commenting is that sex to them is too cheap hence they think everyone indulges in it casually.

The sooner folks learn to control their libido the better trust will be established between both parties.

ImaIma1:


Exactly! Sex is cheap to them and they can just indulge in it without much thought.

My husband was having this same discussion on a group yesterday and had to ask me if i have ever thought he has anything to do with his female friends.

For one of them, he even helped drive her and her hubby outside lag for their wedding and they still keep in touch. She also came for hers. Infact i tease her to feed him when he visits them. I call her my boo's boo

It is about understanding and creating boundaries. As long as there is trust, it's fine. If my hubby were to be the womanizing type, i would raise an eyebrow. We dont hold each other back from our friends as long as we draw the line.

hotwax:


This has negate all your argument. Meaning you maintain your distance. Some married women going on a date with besties is what we are discussing here...

Your husband is your male bestie. Yeah keep your existing friends..but you got to put boundaries...

hotwax:


This has negate all your argument. Meaning you maintain your distance. Some married women going on a date with besties is what we are discussing here...

Your husband is your male bestie. Yeah keep your existing friends..but you got to put boundaries...

megareal:


We hardly meet because we are too busy. Not because we are running from ourselves. We celebrate birthdays and other anniver Ive met How do you think I settle their marital and relation

hotwax:


So you can go out on dinner with them?

Go clubbing with them?

I have even heard a married woman saying "I just went on a date with him...Jezzz...its just a date" Lolz.

megareal:


Leave that post. My phone was acting up, couldn't type properly and didn't even know the ish submitted. Will delete it now.

Now to your question, I hardly went on dates even when I was single. Your use of that word in this context is wrong because dates are for people who want to be in a relationship. Probably you would use outing.

I meet my friends when they need my help or my input on things. And can never stay away from any events concerning them. I don't know about married women who still club with guys other than their husbands. But that is wrong and is inviting trouble except the husband is included in the outing.

My point of view judging from most of the comments here is that no body should do away with good friends because they are married. If your friends are good, you don't even need to set boundaries as they will respect your marriage. Obviously, you can't hangout out like you used to do or discuss you partner anymore with them, but you shouldn't form unavailable and cut links because of marriage.

I would argue more but I don't have the time biko.