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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention (28184 Views)
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4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by stalion(m): 4:07pm On Apr 13, 2007 |
I got a question from a Nairaland friend on how to keep a woman interested, Seems he was getting some problems getting his lady/ladies attracted to him, Well,I got some tips to help him though, So,my guy, I personally think: 1) Most guys "settle" for the women that they wind up with in long-term relationships. 2) When you begin to understand women and have more success, you start to realize that MOST women ARE NOT the type that you'd be HAPPY with long- term. 3) When you have gone through the process of learning how to be more successful with women and make them feel that magical emotion called ATTRACTION, and then you finally DO meet a woman you really like, you have to handle the situation in the right way if you want to keep her. You've asked me a whole bunch of specific questions, like how long should you wait to call, whether to call or email, tone, etc. It sounds to me like you actually LIKE this particular girl, and would like to pursue this in a "let's see if this turns into something" kind of way. With that in mind, I think you need to realize a few things about what a woman EXPECTS you to do, If you're dealing with an attractive woman, then you must remember that you're not the first guy who has ever been interested in her. In fact, she's probably approached all the time by guys, and she probably has a lot of experience with guys who want to "get involved" with her. This is one of those funny situations that works in kind of a backwards way (not unlike many other aspects of male/female relationships, actually). If you meet an attractive girl, you can be pretty sure of a few things: 1) She gets approached by men, one way or another, all the damn time. 2) 99% of the men that she meets and dates wind up following her around like puppies, either from the beginning or eventually. 3) When a guy acts "too nice - too soon", she sees this as a sign of neediness and weakness, and she's repelled by it. I realize that this is going to sound like some kind of bizarre Zen self-help B.S., but sometimes you have to push things away from you gently in order to bring them to you. And beautiful women fall into this category. Lemme ask u a question, "How do you make someone want something?" Have you ever thought about that concept? Why is it that people WANT things in the first place, and how can you actually MAKE someone want something? When you think about the things that YOU want, and then ask yourself WHY you want those things, you'll begin to realize why this is such a profound question. Why is it that Coke has dominated the cola market when we all know that Pepsi wins the taste tests? Why is it that people in Los Angeles buy so many four-wheel drive SUVs? Why is it that some nightclubs keep people outside in line for hours when there's plenty of room inside the club? Well, I obviously can't go into an in-depth explanation of why these things are so, but I think it's obvious that: 1) Most of the things that people "want" aren't for the most logical reasons. 2) We humans only "want what we don't have", and once we get what we want, we quickly get bored. 3) Even knowing that something is readily available to us makes us lose interest. So why such a long explanation? Why not just tell you when to call her, what to say, and what tone to use? Because even if you know the exact right words to say, and the exact right time to say them, the woman you're talking to will still be able to pick up what you're REALLY thinking if you don't understand how and why women become attracted to men. Here are a few ways to make a person want something: 1) Create a challenge. 2) Give her a little, then lean back. 3) Give her the gift of missing you. 4) Be unpredictable. When you create a challenge, you really ENGAGE a woman's mind and emotions. Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men that are push-over Wuss Bags. Women feel ATTRACTION for men who are a CHALLENGE. When you give a woman a little bit, then lean back, then you set up a "Hey, I want more of that" situation. If you just keep pouring on the attention and giving her everything she wants, you'll become uninteresting. When you give a woman the "Gift of missing you", you realize that for women, thinking about, missing, and anticipating the next time is often even more powerful than the actual EXPERIENCE of "the next time". Men often get insecure, and feel that they have to call and keep an eye on a woman all the time. This is a huge mistake. It says all the wrong things. When you're UNPREDICTABLE, you do something that is almost MAGIC, when a man understands how to make a woman feel ATTRACTION, then he doesn't do things that are PREDICTABLE, women will tend to think about him ALL THE TIME. Things that are predictable don't require much thought. They're uninteresting and boring. Things that are UNPREDICTABLE, on the other hand, require a LOT of thought. Unpredictable things are FASCINATING to people, especially women. What makes a movie lame? Predictability. What makes a movie great? A well-written story that ISN'T predictable. Predictability and BORING-NESS are the enemies of ATTRACTION. Here are a few thoughts on the questions you asked: 1) If you call her the next day, be cool about it. Don't try to be too "suave", and don't try to set up another date immediately. Call and say, "Hey, what's up?" Make a little small talk, then hang up. Lean back, and she'll be thinking about you for the next several days (if you didn't act like a dumb-ass the night before, that is). 2) If you email, keep it light as well. In this day and age, I find it natural to email or call. 3) Your TONE should be cool, calm, laid back, busy, and upbeat. Never complain about things, whine, or act like you're in a bad mood and need attention. 4) Be very cool about this. Don't act like you might want to get married within 90 days, or like you've met the woman of your dreams. Give her some space, and the gift of missing you. 5) For the first 10 dates or so, don't see her more than once or twice a week. Stay busy with your life, and always have things going on. 6) Until you decide that you really like a particular woman and want to "settle down" with her, or have a long-term relationship, don't focus too much energy on the relationship. If you're dating other women, don't stop. When you focus all of your energy and time on a woman that you've just met, it often creeps them out and makes them run. Use these concepts HOWEVER you decide to communicate with her. 2 Likes |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by donjohano(m): 10:53pm On Apr 29, 2007 |
And if you want more advice along Stallion's words of wisdom, Google/Wikipedia "David De Angelo" |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by missfunk(f): 1:05pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
well i think you have gotten all the right tips but be carefull |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by missfunk(f): 1:06pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
well i think you have gotten all the right tips but be careful |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by almondjoy(f): 1:14pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
Long talk! Please, 1. Stay employed and pay all the bills in the house. 2. Be an excellent lover. 3. Be an excellent father. 4. Be an excellent husband that knows how to cook my favorite dishes! These would get my attention anyday. 1 Like |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by NaJaHaJe(f): 1:39pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
almondjoy you are too much. LOL |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by noetic(m): 1:53pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
almondjoy: 1. wont you at least support, this shows you are individualistic and selfish. 2. what are d qualities of an excellent lover? 3. that cant be until u marry him 4. is he your house boy? attracting you must be a miserable job!!! go and change |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by almondjoy(f): 2:03pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
noetic: he he he he he he he! Miserable but extremely pleasurable!!!!!! |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by yimiton(f): 2:04pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
When a woman doesn't feel love for you, you could do all the above and more and she just wouldn't notice. Just be hot and be you *natural* and she'll stay on with you. That is if she loves you 1 Like |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by tkb417(m): 2:22pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
@poster meen, that was longggg. . .ill give it a trial @almondjoy i pity ur bf/husband. cook for you? e don happen!! |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by zheroes(m): 2:26pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
almondjoy: that makes him a man almondjoy:not bad if a man can cook for his wife sometimes, but i begin to wonder what role you will play in the home or relationship? |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by almondjoy(f): 3:02pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
noetic: This one does not know the qualities of a good excellent lover at this stage in life? Wonderful. tkb417: That is why "he" is a married man and you are still single!!!! zheroes: My only job is to "breed" and "norture" the products of the "breeding excercise"!!!! He likes to cook and I don't!!!!! Please go and read that that long essay of the original poster, which I did not even bother to read and get all the help you need from there. Goodluck!!!!! |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by wallas: 3:46pm On Jan 08, 2008 |
well while tryna be the man that makes it work it has to do with basic intellect n patient cos s'times while we meet a mate n tryna make it fast in order to keep the peep,we enter into unwanted trouble or maybe ending up with frown faces n frown,but s'times patient is a efficiency i.e waiting n watch ur mate walk out, PEACE |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by Bedhead: 11:15pm On Sep 12, 2008 |
Well, if it ends breaking up and you still have strong feelings for eachother she'll see that eventually and fall in love with you all over again. Basically, all I can say is, Give it Time. It worked for me and a bunch of other friends. |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by syren: 11:28pm On Sep 12, 2008 |
Aaaargh with all these game, tip, tricks, strategies why can't relationships be simple. |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by stephen2(m): 9:57am On Oct 12, 2009 |
@POSTER, GUY WISE UP MEHN,YOU JUST COPIED EVERYTHING FROM DAVID DE ANGELO. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW WHO DAVID DE ANGELO IS,HE IS A GURU IN DATING AND RELATIONSHIPS,YOU CAN GOOGLE THE NAME ON GOOGLE,AM SURE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND BETTER. SO,LETS STOP FOOLING OURSELVES IN AFRICA,YOU COPIED SOMEONE'S ARTICLE AND HERE YOU ARE TELLING SOME COCK AND BULL STORIES ABOUT YOUR FRIEND THAT NEED ANSWERS TO SOME F***KING QUESTIONS,FOR CRYING OUT LOUD,GET A LIFE BOO, |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by Ejiekwu1(m): 9:13am On Oct 05, 2011 |
nice one guys |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by Eberex(m): 10:08am On Dec 14, 2013 |
I have vowed to be myself whether she likes it or not. Its about understanding eachother's strenght/weakness, likes/dislikes, etc and if you discover it aint working you pull out! Both are humans and both have needs too. |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by styno22(m): 12:25pm On Dec 14, 2013 |
U just go copy person book word to word why? U can not write from ur own experience, it is wrong to apply d principles of anoda man to ur own life becos we are all unique and different... |
Re: 4 Tips To Keep A Woman's Attention by Pedro369(m): 5:48am On Sep 16, 2016 |
Just get Money |
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