yomifowe:

@Theblessed,
God is just,righteous as well as a merciful but WHATSOEVER A MAN SOWS, THAT SHALL HE REAP.

[b][size=18pt]Absolutely! I stand by the above but I must add 'Thou shall not judge for judgement is for the Lord'. You do not judge your fellow human beings based on the standards you laid out there in the Church. Why imply the couple in question are sinners (by imposing restrictions on them) when all have sinned aside, fornication and marital infidelity, haven't they?

Therefore, leave it to God to judge them and not you because, everyone is ANSWERABLE TO GOD ON ALL NEGATIVE THINGS THEY'D DONE, leave it to God. After all, Jesus Christ came for the sinners and not for the Righteous, remember?

Secondly, the Church's test for virginity is fraught with the lowest standards I'd ever seen. Imagine the Church implying that the proof for loss of virginity is via visually exposed and protruding belly of a woman, really? Well, it doesn't surprise me - you see, every dog dey eat s h i t but the one wey s h i t particles/marks dey for in mouth, na him eat pass o o o!

And ask what about men, how could anyone prove their virginity in that regard? Nor could the Church prove the virginity of couples who are on pills and doing it every night?

Church can not control human behaviours by imposing this kind of rules as you can see, it's not working rather it gets worse as most Nigerian girls would rather abort their babies than be scolded by both the Church and family thus, committing 2 sins in order to please the Church/family. In that case, I rather please God than Church/family - Keep the baby and face the consequences.

So as you can see, these are ethical  issues/questions the Church has to deal with in order to review their doctrines to align with modern times. It is difficulty but it can be attained as a lot of people have made suggestions that are applicable in this matter and the Church should listen. 

Nigerian legal system recognises 4 ways a marriage can be made legal a) via Church wedding, b) via Moslem wedding, c) via Registry Office of the land i.e. the so called Court marriage d) via Traditional route and they are all perfect ways to be married, it doesn't necessarily have to be through a Church wedding after all, Adam and Eve marriage was it conducted in the Church? The last time I checked in Genesis Chpt. 2 v. 22 - 25 there weren't a Church there, was it?

Therefore, thou shall not judge for everyone is answerable to God on that beautiful day! Above all, our God is a merciful God, a forgiving God and a tolerant God. And, how about the Church, how tolerant is it?

Yes, we have all sinned and for a sinner, repentance is the ultimate goal in order to attain or be inclusive in his KINGDOM, don't we all know that? Therefore, Church, should stop judging people and preach the Gospel - those who have ears will hear and those without, will perish! [/size][/b]

I think your friend is not financially

If church no gree do wedding for the guy, make he go court go do the wedding now

end of story.

I believe in this age of our generation. Alot of men want to confirm pregnancy with their wives
before putting the ring on the finger. This is due to mass marital problem based on birth giving.


PS: The marriage already took place in another church.

^^ Can your friend request a refund of all tithes he has paid to the church while he was a fornicating sinner?

^^^^^, I dnt think that statement is judgmental?

We can't blame the church but the couple. Because the church has rules and the couple had prior knowledge. They must have been told or warned, in the marriage classes that until they marry they should not act or live like married couples.so they knew the risk I volved when they began to do otherwise.
Secondly, in a situation like this, many churches still have back up plans, instead of living the church , they should have asked the pastor for what to do. Either they. Still go ahead and join them by marriage blessing or church blessing on same day. Or another day. Marriage blessing is conducted for couples, who had been cohabiting but not wedded, there's a little difference in the structure such as : the lady will not be veiled. But  they can still wear gown and exchange rings. They will not be addressed as bride and groom but as man and woman . E.g instead of you may kiss the bride, it may be " you may kiss your wife, or the woman" . In some places, no kissing, because, they have been doing kissing plus since!  

Why churches take such stand on chastity before marriage is probably based on two things.
1. The teaching of christ on the difference between who you you're cohabiting or doing it with and who you are married to with document .

John 4:16-18
16 Jesus saith unto her, Go, call thy husband, and come hither. 17 The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband: 18 For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly.

2.The second reason is probably based on Paul teaching .
Hebrews 13:4
4 Marriage[ is] honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

So I don't see it as church wielding too much power, if churches begins to join Christians with big tummies, guess what the churches will turn into.we will have to take "holy" out of the holy matrimony.

dayokanu:

^^ Can your friend request a refund of all tithes he has paid to the church while he was a fornicating sinner?

nope.

did the church tell him to fornicate and did they force him to bring money.

sorry ur friend is not a christian

My! My! MY! What right is it of a church to be involve with the internal function of a  woman   ? I don't get it! The church request a pregnancy test before performing a wedding?  lolol, I knew the Christian faith and its agents, ie, Missonaries have ran amock throughout the globe but I doubt this is their doing!  

Mary was far from 18 when she was with child and unmarried, we all known the story of her "miraculous conception. So what right is it off any christian church to deny a woman a simple ceremony just because she's pregnant before the ceremony?

I always wonder why Joseph wasn't granted the spiritual seed to impregnant Mary instead of a Spiritual Being.

Now saying all that I wonder why some people believe that the Christian religon carries more weight than that of the ancestors. Clearly, the christian faith speaks of spirits out of one mouth and condems it out of another.
Poster I hope your friend went to a court house and got married and have a healthy baby.

Which is better a Lady that Nyashed got pregnant and aborted it and passed their pregnancy test or the one that presented with her pregnancy and failed the test?

I am saying this because I know a lot of ladies will go to the extent of aborting their pregnancies and presenting themselves 1month later when the level of hCG which is the marker used in pregnancy tests would have gone down. Mind you this person would have committed two sins: fornication and murder and will still be wed by the church because she will pass the so called pregnancy test.

Must hey wed in church or RCCG? If that is their standard and you can't keep up with it then try other churches or venues.

THE CHURCH WAS RIGHT.THE BIBLE SAYS ''BED UNDEFILED''.THAT A WOMAN IS NOT A VIRGIN IS NO DETERRENCE TO MARRIAGE IN THE CHURCH.JOINING A PREGNANT WOMAN WITH A MAN BEFORE GOD IS UNRIGHTEOUSNESS.

FIRST THEY NEED TO PURGE THEMSELVES OF THEIR SIN BY ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS, HAVE THE BABY, THEN COME BACK FOR MARRIAGE.

THE PASTOR WAS SMART ENOUGH NOT TO BE PART OF ANOTHER PERSONS SIN.

akanawu:

Which is better a Lady that Nyashed got pregnant and aborted it and passed their pregnancy test or the one that presented with her pregnancy and failed the test?

I am saying this because I know a lot of ladies will go to the extent of aborting their pregnancies and presenting themselves 1month later when the level of  hCG which is the marker used in pregnancy tests would have gone down. Mind you this person would have committed two sins: fornication and murder and will still be wed by the church because she will pass the so called pregnancy test.

Its betwee the person and God. The issue here has to do with church stand, if the church didnt take a clear stan . It will look as thougn the church condones whatever. And people will go gaga in their lifestyle.gradualism will set in. Someone will come with 8 months pregnancy . Loomat what gay movement is turning into. Satan works through gradualism. It goes beyond what happens secretly between mates. legalise our lifestyle for marriage. Once that is adopted, they move to other things, as legalise couples they want to have right s to adopt babies,  now Satan can raise children up without father and mother. Immagine two men adopting a baby, and raising a baby, what mind set will the baby develop, having lost the sense of father and mother. Watching two men doing it.a generation is lost. Whichever way certain things can be curtail will help preserve a future. The church shouldn't shift the morality stand.

The church is not wrong in cancelling. I am not trying to debate biblical injunction regarding sex before marriage ( i no be saint). However, every institution has its rules. At RCCG, it is already a known fact that pregnancy prior wedding day is forbidden. For the intending couple to have flout the rule is offense punishable by marriage cancellation.
Anyway, registry never finish for Lagos ke.

dis is some real bomboclark comin 4rm d fastest rising most sinful organisatn in d world(churches)

eyoniggar:

I believe in this age of our generation. Alot of men want to confirm pregnancy with their wives
before putting the ring on the finger. This is due to mass marital problem based on birth giving.


PS: The marriage already took place in another church.

silly argument.
so what happens if the lady has a still birth?
or miscarries?
pregnancy should never be the basis for marriage for any real man.
that argument is just escapist and short sighted.

na wao ,they dont receive bribes anymore ni?

the mathematical rules of church marriage as believed is meant to be
1+1=1
not
1+1+0.5=1

Unlucky u. proceed to court.
then go for marriage thanksgiving in the church.

mbulela:

silly argument.
so what happens if the lady has a still birth?
or miscarries?
pregnancy should never be the basis for marriage for any real man.
that argument is just escapist and short sighted.

Not what I brought up, it is what I have observed and
know of.

We really need to understand the stand of the Church on this issue.

It is well known that a Church would not support promiscuity, not even even mere sex between supposed 'intending couples', not even the Catholic Church where many of us try to think we have so much freedom unlike in the Pentecostal ones.

The emphasis of the Church is "chastity" and if a member of such organisation know the rule, why can't they just endure for a while until the night after the wedding, then you have the "licence to kill" each other on bed. Just the same way, you should frown on a man who 'eats' up his salary before pay day. Yes it is his business, but should we encourage that?

The Bible said "marriage is honourable, but the bed must be undefiled". We should strive to be honourable men and women on our wedding. It only shows we respect our Parents, friends and acquintances. It demonstrate your life of integrity and willingness to do what is right in other areas too.

Does it means that even after the wedding, una go dey do the thing anytime he hungry you? You still have to control yourself. We need to drum this to heart. There are norms in every situation, we can't run away from that.


What we should be thinking now is what should be done if things like these happen

Don't blame the church, they only want to make them example to others that they are not partakers of thesin. But is that all>?

For those of u that are criticizing the church, u have every right to, but ur ultimately missing the point. A pregnancy test is not done to determine virginity cos really its not the church's place to enforce the virginity rule. Its done on the assumption that as Christians, you have been keeping God's laws which says no to fornication.

Your friend and his wife to be implied that they were true christians by going to church and trying to get married there. If the lady was pregnant, then the church cannot wed them while she is pregnant. however i am sure that if they came back 10 months later, the church will wed them.

You cant blame the church, blame ur friends. I am sure the church asked them during counselling if they were having sex and they said no. only to do a pregnancy test and the results say otherwise. I know for sure that my church will not wed you if your pregnant. Know the rules of the place you attend and adhere to it.

People don turn church to joint wey dem go de go every sunday just for the sake of it. If you dont believe in God and dont want to follow him, dont waste ur time on sundays. God is clear about his feelings towards fornication.

For those of u wey de shout say babe must preggers b4 u marry, i say foul. so that tomorrow u go begin disrespect me say i use pregnancy to trap u. some men can be so selfish. but if you and ur babe have an understanding on that, RIDE ON. but will it kill you to just wait and marry her 1st. nobody is saying dont do. just dont leave evidence. In the future, your wife will be looked at with disdain by people cos she got pregnant b4 marriage.

abeg jo, make i hear word. They knew b4 hand and should not be angry, court wedding and traditional wedding are also recognized by law.

For those of u wey de shout say babe must preggers b4 u marry, i say foul. so that tomorrow u go begin disrespect me say i use pregnancy to trap u

please tell them.

Quote from Bela Bela: "I must however say that those who accept to wed people they know little or nothing about should be questioned the most".


^ Dey should be questioned d most right? . . .GOOD!!!

Did all the pastors in churchs know's dia members before prayin for dia sins? . . .Why must dey pray for sins dat dey no nottin about? . . . (pls i need an answer)

Did Jesus know's d adulterer in d bible b4 savin her from those people that wanted to stone her to death? Is God goin to question Jesus for savin a sinner? . What was d mission of Jesus on earth? (Abi na pastors be jesus now?) If Jesus can recieve a sin (an adulterer for dat matter), and ask her to go and sin nomore, den who r pastors to judge? Those pastors, are dey not married? If their wifes r so called virgins (who knows how many prick dem don collet b4 pastors put dem for house) r they (pastors) themselfs virgins? Are you tryin to tell me that, if those couple's are Obasanjo's daughter and her fiancee, the marraige will not commence? . . .RUBBISH !!! (THEY ARE ALL CHURCH ROBBERS)  

Can u imagine prayin and asking GOD for forgiveness if a single brother or a single sister fornicates. But u can't wedd a pregnant couple?. . .Why? b'cos they commited fornication. Na who una dey decieve? Ra-ras!!!

Why not first of all, ask them (those couple) to confess their sins before GOD (right there in the alter), and after that, ask them to bow their heads and pray for them for GOD to forgive them their sins, before procceedin on the church marraige service?

what should the Church do else?

What should the Couple do?

Let me set out some hypothetic principles:

1. The Couple ahd commited fornication, but they sincerely want to marry
2. The Church wish to establish that they are 'holy' or at least not having sex since they are not married (Pregnancy started coming up when it was discovered that some married ladies suddenly had a baby after marriage. This embarrases the Church)
3. These couple did not go further to commit another sin: abortion. So they were exposed
4. Is it that the Cancellation was to show the Church is not their partner in sin, punishe them or put them to shame: which? or all?
5. The couple wish to and had to still marry. What conditions are needed or should be followed to process this?
6. What variant or kind of marriage ceremony would, should or could the Church administer to join them in Marriage at least different from 'Holy Matrimony'
7. The Church is expected to be compassionate on them considering the effort, expenses and guest involved in the marriage.
8. This is an example: May be the Church could allow all the Guest to sit, then announce the sin of the couple and ask the Brides Father to personally handle the case, if he wishes to still give his daughter, he should just do it himself inthe presence of the people but the Church may not have to do any other ceremony to do again and everybody goes home. At least people witnessed the giving and also heard what they did wrong.
(Or What do you suggest?)
9. The couple need to render some public apology or show some remorse recognising the fact that having sex while ummarried is sin (we can't deny that even if you indulge in it, it is sin)
10 But something must be done to protect the future of that family who may be seen as sinner today may become saints tommorrow. God still forgives.

etc. etc.

WHAT DO WE THINK?

WE CAN PROFER A SOLUTION HERE WHICH WILL HELP SUCH COUPLE BUT ALSO MARK THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING FAITHFUL OR UPRIGHT AND BEING SINFUL, IMMORAL AND UNRULY.

Ranoscky said this:

[

color=#006600]Why not first of all, ask them (those couple) to confess their sins before GOD (right there in the alter), and after that, ask them to bow their heads and pray for them for GOD to forgive them their sins, before procceedin on the church marraige service? [/color

]

This is an idea like i suggested.

Please we must not forget that those strong people who are able keep themselves "pure" until they married should also be commended, at least if not rewarded just like the unfaithful being punished. what do you also suggest about this?

We need to find some wholesome comments on all this. We on NAIRALAND may the solution provider that the Church may eventually adopt our formula. We must be agent of positive change: The prosperity of posterity is great potency[size=8pt][/size]

^ Dey should be questioned d most right? . . .GOOD!!!

Did all the pastors in churchs know's dia members before prayin for dia sins? . . .Why must dey pray for sins dat dey no nottin about? . . . (pls i need an answer)

Did Jesus know's d adulterer in d bible b4 savin her from those people that wanted to stone her to death? Is God goin to question Jesus for savin a sinner? . What was d mission of Jesus on earth? (Abi na pastors be jesus now?) If Jesus can recieve a sin (an adulterer for dat matter), and ask her to go and sin nomore, den who r pastors to judge? Doz pastors, are dey not married? If their wifes r so called virgins, r they (pastors) themselfs virgins? Are you tryin to tell me that, if it's Obasanjo's daughter and her fiancee are the couple, then the marraige will not commence? . . .RUBBISH !!! (THEY ARE ALL CHURCH ROBBERS)  

Can u imagine prayin and asking GOD for forgiveness if a single brother or a single sister fornicates. But u can't wedd a pregnant couple?. . .Why? b'cos they commited fornication. Na who una dey decieve?  Ra-ras!!!

Why not first of all, ask them (those couple) to confess their sins before GOD (right there in the alter), and after that, ask them to bow their heads and pray for them for GOD to forgive them their sins, before procceedin on the church marraige service?  

Thank you my broda, leave all these hypocrites that are busy fortifying their pockets and are quick to judge others. What if that pregnancy is God's design for the couple? Even let me ask, do you know how many times a day the so called G.O'S commit fornication and adultery in a day? Or do you think you have to sleep physically with someone to commit the sin of fornication or adultery as the case may be. These so called G.O's and pastors  should first repent of their sins and give their lives to Christ and follow His words and ways accordingly. Christianity is all about love and if you notice your brother has fallen, you are expected to do everything possible to help him up once again and never ever judge or condemn. Just as someone asked Jesus how many times he should forgive his brother in a day, you know what, 77x7 times. So God's word remains that even if that lady got pregnant 539 times in a year, No pastor have the right to deny her right (wedding) in the Church of God. After all, who ever think that he or she has not committed any wrong (sinless) should cast the first stone.

Please we must not forget that those strong people who are able keep themselves "pure" until they married should also be commended,

My dear, leave that to God as only Him knows the heart of men. In spiritual matters, never ever judge someone on physical appearances, obedience of man-made rules or mistakes. Just as the scripture says that rejected stone might be the corner stone after all. Have you ever wondered why God made so much use of the so called sinners in the bible rather than the holier than thou's? Why moses- a murderer, Jacob-a cheat, David-a fornicator ( remember, God even labeled him 'a man after my heart'. Just think about it

they must have disagreed with sex before marriage in the bible because they want a woman to be special for her husband, they are preserving the value, if they hammer a girl before marriage doesn't mean she's eaten the forbidden fruit or has commited any major crime/sin. i beleive they just want a girl to have self respect and be whole, all for the man. bible has always placed man high. and if you believe it's a sin then so is your portion but some of us dont have a v card and God doesn't love me any lesser

RCCG Marriage doctrine:
Marriage is btw two people - a man and his wife. It shouldn't involve a third party (the child in this case). The couple can still get married after the child is born (provided other rules are followed)


You will have to check the full details with the redeem church.

I just want to imagine what would have happened had it been the pregnant Mary and Joseph that had approached this "church" for marriage.

That case proves it is God that joins, not churches! But the "church owners" would have it other wise so they don;t lose the power they hold over members