"Never lie to someone who trust you and Never trust someone who lies to you"?

This quote spoke wonders to me this past week so I decided to open it up for a friendly Nairaland discussion! This is one of my biggest deal breakers in dating, but maybe I am just being unrealistic these days. From my own experience it seems like lies and dishonesty are the norm these days in relationships. Kind of a what she/he doesn't know wont hurt her/him? So my questions is ,
Is a lie a deal breaker for you in your dating relationships and would you leave someone who you found out continuously lies to you? Most times the lies maybe small but some will say small lies later leads to bigger ones! What are your thoughts?

I hate lies in a relationship, there has to be trust and truth shuld b d foundation of a good relationship

Ladyjide:

"Never lie to someone who trust you and Never trust someone who lies to you"?

This quote spoke wonders to me this past week so I decided to open it up for a friendly Nairaland discussion! This is one of my biggest deal breakers in dating, but maybe I am just being unrealistic these days. From my own experience it seems like lies and dishonesty are the norm these days in relationships. Kind of a what she/he doesn't know wont hurt her/him? So my questions is ,
Is a lie a deal breaker for you in your dating relationships and would you leave someone who you found out continuously lies to you? Most times the lies maybe small but some will say small lies later leads to bigger ones! What are your thoughts?

we lie from day one of dating we promise each other heaven and earth

i would definetly liv a complusive liar , cus even if he is sayin d truth sumtin in me wud always tink its a lie and wud defo lead to arguements all d time
so as lola sed truth upholds most relationship.

Depends.

I kept quiet about somethings when I met my woman - just felt she did not need to know at the time. Of course, I told her later on when I felt more comfortable with her . . well before we got engaged and married of course. You cant lie to me well into the marriage - I may not forgive for that one.

Of course there are things you definately need to be upfront with me about from day one.  But there are some white lies or silences I can overlook or even forget at the very early stages of a relationship.

If, as a lady, you mistakenly farted on a first date in a restaurant . . would you own up to it?    

ZIM DRILL:

we lie from day one of dating we promise each other heaven and earth

Who does that but  men,

Ladyjide:

Who does that but men,

both

women promise to be good understanding wife

kokoye:

Depends.

I kept quiet about somethings when I met my woman - just felt she did not need to know at the time. Of course, I told her later on when I felt more comfortable with her . . well before we got engaged and married of course. You cant lie to me well into the marriage - I may not forgive for that one.

Of course there are things you definately need to be upfront with me about from day one.  But there are some white lies or silences I can overlook or even forget at the very early stages of a relationship.

If, as a lady, you mistakenly farted on a first date in a restaurant . . would you own up to it?    

I respect what you are saying, but keeping quiet to some is as a good as a lie. Why not put everything out on the table from day one! I am one of those people that feel this way.

'Everything' is relative.

I'm sure you dont want a chatterbox.

How many men have told you they want to sleep with you on the first date . . .or you think they really dont want to?

kokoye:

'Everything' is relative.

I'm sure you dont want a chatterbox.

How many men have told you they want to sleep with you on the first date . . .or you think they really dont want to?

I would rather have a chatterbox, than a mute- who pretends,  For example- telling me you do not  want to sleep with me on the first date when you really do  is far different than the scenario of  letting  me know  you have a wife and a few kids back home in Nigeria when you are here trying to date me!!  That is info that is worth sharing dont you agree?

^^^

Na, we aint talking about that kinda lie. There are white lies and black lies.

That one is a dark, black lie. And the person who'd tell that kinda lie does not really like you anyway.

and just so you know, some chatterboxes do lie all the way thru 

The item I value most in a relationship is HONESTY. I can't tolerate anyone (especially someone i love so much) lying to me.

I had this girlfriend that i hoped to marry. She claimed she would never lie to me but i noticed she was telling half truths and concealing information from me. I was totally disappointed.

In my opinion - lies, half truths and outright concealing of information are all the same.

I have since moved on but i find it really hard to forgive her.

190:

I hate a lady that would go around spreading words

about her relationship among her friends and these friends would take

undue advantage of her man and she wont be able to stand and do nothing about it,

I despise ladies that LIE through their teeth daily.claiming to be something they clearly arent!

I hate ladies that make ideas through their friends and tell their friends pratically evrything that happens in their relationship


its such a pity!

hmmm such passion

lol

kokoye:

^^^
Na, we aint talking about that kinda lie. There are white lies and black lies.

That one is a dark, black lie. And the person who'd tell that kinda lie does not really like you anyway.

and just so you know, some chatterboxes do lie all the way thru 

Point well taken!

sharp man:

The item I value most in a relationship is HONESTY. I can't tolerate anyone (especially someone i love so much) lying to me.

I had this girlfriend that i hoped to marry. She claimed she would never lie to me but i noticed she was telling half truths and concealing information from me. I was totally disappointed.

In my opinion - lies, half truths and outright concealing of information are all the same.

I have since moved on but i find it really hard to forgive her.

I value honesty as well, but that small thing is a rare find these day! Shame shame!

iice:

Is that from Dexter?

Yes. . .a deal breaker yes. Perpetually lying, please i no get time.
Somethings are not worth lying about but like kokoye said, everything is relative.

YES! YES!! Dexter spoke to me!!! True talk though! lol

@post

experiencing the same thing as well.

when i find out or when he comes out with the truth, he has an explanation for telling the lie in the first place.

yet, he claims he is madly in love with me 

he is always quick to tell me that no man is 100percent honest 

most recent was the final straw. he lied about having to attend a party at another city as an excuse why we could not hook up, when actually he had a friend visiting him at his place. Later, he comes clean that he didnt attend the party but says nothing about the friend that was with him (which is the reason he lied about the phony party) and lied that he was alone 

next, he is quick to say i do not trust him.

abeg, who in her right senses will trust a glaring liar? 

2 be mature is d ability not 2 lie but not 2 say d truth.

How about  folks who  withhold very useful  information?   My best friend's wife  didn’t tell my friend - her husband of her fibroid until she was pregnant and became a constant visitor to a perinatologist. Risky and silly stuff some folks do for marriage

Lies . . . . .

Some lies are inevitable. But when they start lying about irrelevant thing . . . . one has to wonder!

funkybaby:

@post

experiencing the same thing as well.

when i find out or when he comes out with the truth, he has an explanation for telling the lie in the first place.

yet, he claims he is madly in love with me 

he is always quick to tell me that no man is 100percent honest 

most recent was the final straw. he lied about having to attend a party at another city as an excuse why we could not hook up, when actually he had a friend visiting him at his place. Later, he comes clean that he didnt attend the party but says nothing about the friend that was with him (which is the reason he lied about the phony party) and lied that he was alone 

next, he is quick to say i do not trust him.

abeg, who in her right senses will trust a glaring liar? 

Its hard to trust someone who lies over and over again- Liars are cowards. So girl do you forgive him, and stay with him- hoping it will get better?

^^^
For ur own sake, you cannot forgive a perpetual liar. Their entire life is a lie and I know loads of people like that.

Like you said, they are cowards but wont admit it so they cover up with lies.

They actually start to believe their own lies.

Insecurity and low self-esteem if you ask me.

Men lie. . . women lie

just don't get caught . . the 11th commandment

you get caught back it up with another lie . . .12th commandment

Telling lies has being part of d human nature
but it only take GOD grace & determination 2 let it off our lips.
Most ladies here says dey hate guys dat lies, but how about dose lies he said 2 make u happy & feel appreciated
how about dose lies u lied to ur man 2 boost his ego when u know he is failure in bed
how about dose lies on house keeping allowance he gave u
and so on
b4 u remove d perk on some1 eyes, pls removn d log on ur own eyes.

Ladyjide:

Its hard to trust someone who lies over and over again- Liars are cowards. So  girl do you forgive him, and stay with him- hoping it will get better?

get better bawo?
we've parted ways.

^^^

good move.

kokoye:

^^^

good move.

Gpp

funkybaby:

get better bawo?
we've parted ways.

Good Thing!!