hey guys please i need your candid advice especially marriage councillors. my girlfriend is really in love with a man of 47years while she is 30. the man was married to a white lady in U.S.A who helped him to secure green card and they have no issue and divorced. so the man is proposing to her but she is confused . they man is everything a woman will want from her real man. please advice before is too late. she has a boyfriend who is young but is messing up so she is really trying to consider the old one. please make una talkoooooooooooooooooooo.

@poster
does ur friend love this older guy too or is she just after green card, stability and security that her young guy can't give her just now?
When she feels she has achieved all that, will she then be looking outward of her marriage for the excitement?

make no mistake ppl, if there is more than 10yrs difference btwn partners, u had better think carefully why u both are in that relationship

The guy seems old enough (and experienced in marriage) to know not to take this lightly, and it appears he is willing to invest more in it. He seems to be bringing more to the table - so the question is:

IS THIS AN EASY WAY OUT FOR YOUR FRIEND?, or does she love this older guy deep down?

If they are both in love, there is no big deal they should get married but if otherwise, please she should not bother. Like was rightly said above after getting the security and stability from this older guy, then what? she would probably get bored and then start looking for something or someone else. She should try and date this man first for a while before jumping off to marry him, she should visit him in the states get to know what he does for a living, how he lives his life, what happened between him and his ex etc. The states with all its glory can be a very God forsaken place too. She should think hard, when you are with the wrong man everything shuts down completely. She should use her HEAD.

simple and short : if she loves the 47 years oldman go for him

love knows no age, color,race,or religious preference

I agree with you Ikamefa, that love knows no age, but marriage to some extent does.

17 years age difference isn't a joke, not to mention the level of the guy's maturity when it comes to marriage and life. She just can't jump into a marrigae with him without thinking through the pro's and con's

From the story, pardon me but i do not think she loves the guy and going into a marriage just because planA failed, or because you think time is running out

Whatever happened to a couple growing together??

I'm not blind to the fact that some have been there and are still happy for the decisions they made. The story in a nut-shell is that going after a man out of desperation to get married, or based on material stuff isn't ideal at all

Along the road, when the bad times hit, where's the rock that'll lift you up??
At the end of the day, only your friend knows what she's feeling deep down, if she isn't attarcted to this guy in terms of marriage, doesnt love him nor think she would have choosen him if she were given the oppotunity to pick the guy in her life, then she shouldn't make that mistake

Let her leave both of them, and go find her destiny, her guy is somewhere out there waiting for her, but on the other hand again it might be this guy?? . . but she has to search herself

Marriage isnt something you jump into just because - - please my dear, tell her to look before leaping, some taake it for granted, but "till death do us path"is supposed to last for like forever. Now can she picture herself with him for that long??

I know the answer lies in her head, she just needs to dig it out I wish her luck and a funtional brain

Thanks guys for all the advice. i reached home yesterday and discuss with her i found out that she is getting in love and not minding that the white lady had two kids for the man according to her. she told me that among the young guys she has dated , she has never fall in love as much like the old guy. the lady is working and okay so i dont think is materialistic thing. when you see the young guy she is datng before the old man , at times i do envy her because of the younger guy though attimes it looks as if the younger one dont appreciate her
help because the younger one is not working and he always feel that my friend is bribing him to love her. i mean the guy is hansome.
so my good fellas dont see it as money or no love. you need to see were this old man is displaying to this girl when he came to nigeria.
ONCE again thanks guys i printed the answer i got yesterday and give to her . Ask her to pray and think over it but men she is confused.

@ menka

If all the feelings and motives and thoughts are in their right places, then why the hell not?? I believe love conquers a lot, just as long as the other "requirements" on the "recipe" of a successful marriage is there too.

Like i said earlier, 17 is a lot but when its between a 30 and 47, it might not be that noticeable, esp. if the guy takes good care of his health and looks. Age they say is just a number but they should be prepared to go the extra mile to sustain what they have. Its just one of the sacrifices of love though, nothing out of da blue
They wouldn't be the first, but whether it works out or not, is all in their hands

If he's all she's ever wanted and dreamt of, then she should go for it

I wish her luck and God's guidance

she has to use her head,not her heart and pray in patients for God to lead her.
Marriage is for life,

Let her go and marry a 47yr old Man, Na she sabi! she will suffer at the end,cos there will be a time that the man wont be performing (u knw what i mean). And she will need a younger Man to do the thing.Cheers!!!!!!!!!!

she want marry her papa. . .she want go yankee. . .tell me another lie.

ikamefa:

simple and short : if she loves the 47 years oldman go for him

love knows no age, color,race,or religious preference

I agree.

she has to think it thoroughly with herself and families and prayer is the key..lastly she has to do her own concrete investigation on the man because na who de sick know were de pain ham..

kennyok:
she has to think it thoroughly with herself and families and prayer is the key..lastly she has to do her own concrete investigation on the man because na who de sick know were de pain ham..

dude,thread is almost 6 years old,where u go dig dis 1 comot from?? d gal would have been married with kids by now sef .. 3:56pm On May 24 , 2007