Before I start my topic. I want to advice guys never to date a girl that have this attributes:

1. Doesn't speak her mind. This can make u think she's reserve or somethin but its a lie. U'll know later. U'll be suprise she's socially awkward. And knows nothin.
2. That grew up wit her step mother.
3. Wrong background. Never go below ur standards. A girls background matter. It will surely affect compatibility. If she grew up in the projects and ur not. Its a big no! U'll even have problem wit her parents.
4. Make sure she can read & write properly. Everyone speaks English averagly this days. But she maybe suffering from dylexia.
5. Thats too hot in bed. She might be a nymph that will definitly screw the driver someday.
6. All women are actors till they get what they want. Be careful. No background check, no marriage.
7. Someone who you rarely find in an happy mood of her own. I mean she's not lively.

I have a baby mama wit all these attribute. We're extremely uncompatible. I can now see its true she was forcing a way through back then.

With all of this, i've always taught she was not an happy person herself so I dont wanna hurt her. Since she got pregnant till now (my baby boy is about 4months). I've never cheated on her. And basically because she's been kinda faithful when it comes to this. But I fear her aggressive libido will force her someday.

The main problem remains compatibility. I feel like separating without hurting her. And I want this wonderful son we made to be wit me. She cant keep him, else she'll make his life miserable. She just found out why my boy always smiles when he sees me, now he's doin the same wit her. Cos the little boy usually only sucks her breast for food then bones (slang).

She could be possessive too. I want the baby. I dont want her to turn my boy to a nuisance and then send him to me when he's already a old fool like her mother that you cant give proper training.

Make I no lie this woman loves me. But we're uncompatible.

Not one person from my side like her my friends, family etc. But all her ppl like me and wonder how we even met. Cos she not even open to her family. She's an island. Though she got like 3friends I know. When I ask what she discusses wit them when they're together. She says 'nothing' or 'life'

what do i do about her? I'm not the lively guy I used to be.

Wrong background. Never go below your standards. A girls background matter. It will surely affect compatibility. If she grew up in the projects and your not. Its a big no! You'll even have problem wit her parents.

Interesting, this is a 'broda' living in Ikorodu and saying "if a girl grew up in the projects,,,,,,,,"; is there a bigger project than where you are?

i was wondering the same lmao

So na now wey she no dey compatible with you, abi?   When both of you were doing the. . . ehm. . 'intimate relations', that led to the baby's conception, una dey compatible. No be so?

First of all, how many times have you tried to talk to her and to find out what is on her mind? By being romantic, vulnerable, open and caring towards her, you might discover that she will open up to you, with time. 

You have already shown her that you are only interested in your kid, and you don't give a hoot about her. So how do you think she will open up to you? Why don't you show deep interest in her? Crack jokes. Make it clear to her that she matters to you. I bet you don't even know her favourite colour, or her favourite food. Maybe she was even scolded for being a talkative at a young age, so she withdrew into her shell. Who knows?

Some guys are so self-centred that they only talk about themselves, and want everyone to fall over them, in adoration. Maybe, there are things you have said in a hurtful manner to her in the past, that is making her sullen. Find out. Be romantic towards her. Afterall, it takes a little bit of caring, to get a woman to give you a whole lot of loving.

Finally, what your family or your people have said about her, has obviously influenced your view of her. It is sad.

@mockers you mis understood the word 'projects'. Its about being raised like that and where you grew. And in her case she grew up in a moderate Lag estate but its just the type of backward friends/ppl around her. I dont even know how to explain anymore.

Even If you live at Lekki some 5minute drive off those estates might just reveal some shocking residents. Same everywhere in Lagos. So u can leave in Ikd and live in a GRA or , Plus can you tell me what better way to buy/build a big house cost effectively in Lagos than to come down town Ikorodu. I'm proud to own a property here and I some of you dont move around a lot.

@at laudate thanks your comments are very useful.

@ poster, you forgot to include one sect: FEMINISTS[color=#990000][/color]

How in the world did you get attracted to her in the first place? Now she's got a baby and its dawned on you!

U guys are not compactible u say,So how come u went the all way and even got her to have a son 4 u, Na wao!
Such things do happen anyway,
[/b]My advice: call her to order,talk to her,tell her to move on with her life,take ur son,take care of her bills all the way till she gets someone that fits her kind of person,let it be ur little secret, if not one day,u will get hooked to someone that u feel is compactible wit u[b].
Cheerio

laudate:

So na now wey she no dey compatible with you, abi? When both of you were doing the. . . ehm. . 'inimate relations', that led to the baby's conception, una dey compatible. No be so?.

Abi O,my brother. Help me ask am O! LMAO

Wel tis a matter of hw u lay ur bed. B4 she got ur baby all d signs were there. Mayb u turned blind eyes due 2 some salient reasons or thinkng she's going 2 change. Wat was her bacground:educatn status-finance/social? And urs?b4 i can profer any solution.by d way did u pple tie knot legally

Wel tis a matter of hw u lay ur bed. B4 she got ur baby all d signs were there. Mayb u turned blind eyes due 2 some salient reasons or thinkng she's going 2 change. Wat was her bacground:educatn status-finance/social? And urs?b4 i can profer any solution.by d way did u pple tie knot legally

I pity u my guy oooooooooo but nevertheless some of those things are real.Its gud to look b4 u leap.

@ Poster
I wonder why men like you think they alone have the right to choose and the woman should be happy you chose her.
What nonesense are you talking about status and background? its men like you who marry yokozunas that will beat the shit out of them after marriage. If a woman had said this I am sure all hell will let loose on how the women are going only for big fishes and leaving the poor guys broken hearted.
Any way just to let you know that its your cross and you should carry it alone dont infect other decent young men who know that even poor girls can be decent and good with your "women bad " syndrome
If you cant keep an errection for long and thereby dont satisfy your babe why will you blame her for wanting it offten she wants to experience the joy of sex and since you cant do it for long she demands it more offten the fact that you ejaculate and got her pregnant doesnt mean you give good sex.
Just listen to yourself every reason you give is based on probability go do more research my dear and come talk with us when you find the truth. Your attributes are worse than those of the woman you stated here maybe women should send warnnings not to date guys like you.

@Hannydal your reply sounds so much like gender protection thing. If you disagree wit me. Then experiment wit your own daughters and give them such poor upbringing. There are women you meet and feel lucky for having them.

And about sex - I'm not sure you know what you're talking about, cos you're not there yet. When it come to sex, I'm an explorer. I know its only a nymph that will continue even when her v is feelin numb. And I know what my woman wants in bed. Many time I even allow the lady be control, her preferences, her pace, and satisfaction.

If ur boyfriend aint doing u well and ur on my thread to spill it. Be warned!


@topic
its not easy living with that type of woman. I've been patient all the way thinking she'll change. Putting a lot of my effort to making things work. But now I'm just afraid it might just continue for ever that way.

When I met her she was the type that never apologizes. I kept apologizing for her own mistakes for us to be in peace for months. Then later was explaining the essence of 'sorry's' and reconciliation to a 27yrs old woman. Thats how she learnt it.

My dad came visitin cant even offer him water to drink or entertain. And she finds it difficult to greet ppl. Some ppl stopped coming to the house. I had to do another tutorial on that for her.

Most of the teaching as been on skills a woman should have acquired naturally.

Initially I just taught she quite/reserved and didn't know it was going to be an unbearable attitude problem.

I didn't want a child or somethin. I just taught its cool when she explained she wanna have. Then i decided to give her all the support. And I stood by her side. Do you know what stress a man can go through when a partner is pregnant too. Many sleepness nights. I wouldn't do all of that if I'm not patient.

Her family knows - I get a lot encouragement from her sister who must have been raised in that condition but adjusted to life better.

I hope to get a solution too, but its gettin more frustrating. And I dont wanna involve 3rd parties.

Though I can involve an anonymous 3rd party from the forum if you're interested you can send me an email at majormediainc@gmail.com.

hmmmmmmmmmmm.
Pple's replies can b very hurtin at atimes. He mite ve ova emphasized some points bt dat does nt rule out d fact dat his assertions are true.
Most tyms u lift a gal from her position to a higher one and she becomes arrogant all of a sudden. She starts exhibiting traits dat were nt there wen u wer courting or wen u guys just started.
I feel dis brother's pain, because only if u kno how hurting it is to ve a woman dat pretends to b reserved and always moody, den u wil feel him well. Some pple re sayin he shld get romantic enough and ask for y d attitude my pple i can b sure she wnt tlk.
Jst pray dat ur partner remains as sweet as he/she had been till d end.
no long tin

tEsLim:

@topic
its not easy living with that type of woman. I've been patient all the way thinking she'll change. Putting a lot of my effort to making things work. But now I'm just afraid it might just continue for ever that way.

When I met her she was the type that never apologizes. I kept apologizing for her own mistakes for us to be in peace for months. Then later was explaining the essence of 'sorry's' and reconciliation to a 27yrs old woman. Thats how she learnt it.

My dad came visitin can't even offer him water to drink or entertain. And she finds it difficult to greet people. Some people stopped coming to the house. I had to do another tutorial on that for her.

Most of the teaching as been on skills a woman should have acquired naturally.

Initially I just taught she quite/reserved and didn't know it was going to be an unbearable attitude problem.

I didn't want a child or somethin. I just taught its cool when she explained she want to have. Then i decided to give her all the support. And I stood by her side. Do you know what stress a man can go through when a partner is pregnant too. Many sleepness nights. I wouldn't do all of that if I'm not patient.

Her family knows - I get a lot encouragement from her sister who must have been raised in that condition but adjusted to life better.

You knew all about her inadequacies, yet you went along with the idea to have a baby with her, just because you think it is[i] cool [/i] Are you serious? Do you know what it takes to bring a baby up, in this stressful world? Why on earth did you get her pregnant, when you knew you wouldn't be able to cope with all these issues or her moods? I weak o!  

Secondly, you said you had to teach her how to apologise and even serve some people drinks etc. That was a very good effort on your part. You deserve some commendation. But am interested to know, how was this teaching done? Was it in a romantic, gentle manner, or was it in a harsh, derogatory tone? Sometimes, in an effort to put our views across, we might come across as overbearing and aggressive. This would make an emotionally scarred person on the receiving end, withdraw deeper into his or her shell.  

From what you have said, she obviously didn't have a biological mother who could have taught her social graces or ettiquette, or human relations. Maybe she was bullied as a child by relatives or her step-mother. So she developed a thick skin, in order to cope with her inner turmoil. From what you have described, she obviously is going through some kind of mild sychological disorder (please, am not saying she is mad o!), or is still bearing some kind of emotional scars that have refused to heal.  

Take her to see a good counsellor or therapist, so that she can work through her problems. And show her a lot of love & encouragement. May the good Lord strengthen you, as you continue to help this poor, troubled soul.

@TEslm

I am not disputing the fact that women and men(not women alone) hurt their partners feelings but the fact is just because a low class woman hurt you shouldnt make you cattegorize other women who are unfortunate to come out from not so well to do bacground under the same umbrella some rich chicks play games and some rich boys also play games.If you were the one always wanting sex from your woman the and she thinks you are over doing it I believe you will cry foul and blame her for beign frigid so how do you know when sex is too much?Just because a woman is sexually active with you doesnt mean she will screw the driver when you are not there it hurts me when men think they alone desreve the right to have frequent sex on earth and a woman should be sattisfied with what ever they give her.
Anyway I am sorry my reply hurt you I saw the smoke comming out of your ears in your reply to mine
the one part I found fault with her is her making all your friends and loved ones leave you I have a friend whose wife is like that she is rude to him and to people around she just doesnt give a shit about what people think she told me she loves him but just doesnt know how to control her behaviour towards him and other people and she offten has to appologise to people and then repeat the same shit again but its too late for mr hubby he has to be patient and wait for her to change or bear the title of divorcee.
If you cant bear you babe just leave the relationship and make sure you hide all your important documents and cash oh. and dont think that the next girl who may fall for you is bad just because you are richer and more outspoken than her ok. Love comes from every race colour class and back ground and you might be lucky to have a richer babe or one a bit lower than you finnancialy who will love you like hell.

Its not really about coming from a rich family. But generally being exposed atimes. I made myself who I'm.

Even when I was younger I spent a year with my grandma in a very local settings but it just added more value to my life and didn't make me a villager. Imagine a city boy that can hunt, make grass cutter traps etc.

My point is let your children socialize. Spend times with cousins and other ppl.