A lot has changed in the dating world in just the past ten years. It wasn’t so long ago that a majority of couples met through friends, rather than on the internet or through an app. It wasn’t so long ago that the term “ghosting” conjured up visions of apparitions and haunted houses, not selfish singles disappearing from your life rather than having the courtesy of saying goodbye. Ten years ago, nobody spent their toilet-time swiping through the profiles of dozens or even hundreds of local singles, expanding the sweep of their search for long across an entire city.

Yes, the dating game has changed, but as the saying goes, “the more things change, the more they stay the same.” Some things, it seems, are timeless. Men are still expected to do the wooing, and women to sit back and either accept or reject a man’s advances, and that dynamic seems pretty darn indestructible.

You can moan about it or decry it as unfair all you want, but if you actually want to alleviate your loneliness and meet your special someone, at some point in time you’re going to have to work up the courage to ask someone out.

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Dating apps help, somewhat, in that you both have to pre-approve (so to speak) the other dater, and instead of doing it in person – where you might get laughed at or have a drink thrown in your face, in the absolute worst-case scenarios – you’re doing it digitally, where the worst that can happen is just having your offer declined. But they still don’t solve your cardinal problem, which is convincing another human being to take a shot on you.

To help make things at least a little easier on you, we consulted some dating experts— from therapists to coaches to psychologists — to figure out the best strategy for approaching another person with romantic intent. What follows won’t guarantee you a date with the person you’re asking out (nothing can!), but it will dramatically increase your chances of success.

Be Honest and Sincere
This might sound like advice your grandmother would give you, but that’s because your grandmother was probably a wise woman who knew what she was talking about.

Sincerity is a huge plus, particularly when so many people are deliberately fake, concocting false personas that they think will make them more attractive. In a dating world where so many people are trying to be something they’re not, there’s something refreshing about a person who has the courage to be himself.

To ask a girl out, one should be honest and sincere? I find this funny. For me, I simply ask her out.

Where is the HOW ?

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