Hello House!
I really appreciate you guyz on nairaland and right now i am in a dilemma and some advice from you guyz might be of great help.
I am a young dad, married and upwardly mobile but I want to try my hands on the US student visa so that in the end I might be able to settle there with my Family.
However a part of me is just skeptical due to fears of regrets and all.
Is it a smart move to resign my not too bad job for the US with my family? Will i get a good job offer there to cater for my family as a student and after graduating from the school?
Should I just stay put here and keep managing what Nigeria has to offer(Boko Haram,NEPA,Armed robbers,Bad roads etc) ?
I am begging for answers here.Advice from people who have gone to the US on legal grounds would be most appreciated here.

Thanks in advance!

How do you want to cater for yourself and your family as a student on student visa and for how many years? and you have a not so bad job in Nigeria? Think properly. Boko Haram,NEPA,Armed robbers,Bad roads etc are not enough reasons to subject yourself to life in bondage.

Put deep thought in before you jump that little fence to "greener pastures". Because when you try to go back, and you probably will try, that same fence may become an infinite wall,

beeman80:

Hello House!
I really appreciate you guyz on nairaland and right now i am in a dilemma and some advice from you guyz might be of great help.
I am a young dad, married and upwardly mobile but I want to try my hands on the US student visa so that in the end I might be able to settle there with my Family.
However a part of me is just skeptical due to fears of regrets and all.
Is it a smart move to resign my not too bad job for the US with my family? Will i get a good job offer there to cater for my family as a student and after graduating from the school?
Should I just stay put here and keep managing what Nigeria has to offer(Boko Haram,NEPA,Armed robbers,Bad roads etc) ?
I am begging for answers here.Advice from people who have gone to the US on legal grounds would be most appreciated here.

Thanks in advance!

certain professional careers and technical skills are employable in the states and other parts of the globe. It depends on your career line. It is will be difficult and risky gamble to move to the states to pick up a student status given the fact that you're a family man. That are many ways you can plan your intended migration. I know of a Naija banker  who picked up an online Msc from the states, got a job with HSBC in the gulf and currently got transferred to chicago.
Layout your options and go for the best.

Thanks!

27naira:

certain professional careers and technical skills are employable in the states and other parts of the globe. It depends on your career line. It is will be difficult and risky gamble to move to the states to pick up a student status given the fact that you're a family man. That are many ways you can plan your intended migration. I know of a Naija banker  who picked up an online Msc from the states, got a job with HSBC in the gulf and currently got transferred to chicago.
Layout your options and go for the best.

Thanks! But are u inferring that I go for am an online masters?I am looking at MBA in IT.

What's your dream like?


I think it's all about the dream, Also, testing the waters isn't a bad idea, get the student visa, that doesn't stop your work, maybe you can get an holiday and see what real time opportunities are in there for you. US is quite big,


There's a worse boko haram in the US and that's alqaieda, in 1 day, they killed over 6000 people, and they also got armed robbers too, sophisticated ones,

damola1:

What's your dream like?


I think it's all about the dream,  Also, testing the waters isn't a bad idea, get the student visa, that doesn't stop your work,  maybe you can get an holiday and see what real time opportunities are in there for you. US is quite big,


There's a worse boko haram in the US and that's alqaieda, in 1 day, they killed over 6000 people, and they also got armed robbers too, sophisticated ones,

Thanks! However do u think it would be wise to live my job and "test the waters"? Are u actually in the US?Are there good opportunities for me after i must have been done schooling?Whats it like working and schooling in the US?Is the pay okay to cater for the family and foot school fees?

@moderator,
  Help this chap & put this up on the front page. He'll get more useful advice that way.

Meanwhile,
@ OP, now you've got a family and that's one thing that should stick. Pardon me if I'm a bit rash, but the truth is whatever you do from now on, putting food on the table of your kids have got to come first. In Africa, at this point, it ain't about you no more. its about your family and giving them the best irrespective of the circumstances surrounding you so that when you eventually bow out, the kids will say "at least Popsi tried"! Don't get it twisted bruv, all I'm saying is we in here can advice for all we care but the ultimate decision is yours and don't forget for a sec that family comes first. Don't mortgage their comfort and tomorrow for anything else. Picture would have been very different if you were still single. so think am well my broda!

@ OP, have you considered looking to the US' cousins, Canada? Yes, it's colder, but as a student, your spouse can come over and work while you study, and it is also possible to get a work permit as a student. Not that you are likely to be able to raise all your tuition and living expenses this way, mind you. Also, as a student with work experience you could look at immigrating as a skilled worker. There is also the new Canadian experience class for foreign students. In my experience, the Canadian immigration process is more straightforward than the US's. Check out the Canadian government immigration website, cic.gc.ca, for more information.

GoldCircle:

@moderator,
  Help this chap & put this up on the front page. He'll get more useful advice that way.

Meanwhile,
@ OP, now you've got a family and that's one thing that should stick. Pardon me if I'm a bit rash, but the truth is whatever you do from now on, putting food on the table of your kids have got to come first. In Africa, at this point, it ain't about you no more. its about your family and giving them the best irrespective of the circumstances surrounding you so that when you eventually bow out, the kids will say "at least Popsi tried"! Don't get it twisted bruv, all I'm saying is we in here can advice for all we care but the ultimate decision is yours and don't forget for a sec that family comes first. Don't mortgage their comfort and tomorrow for anything else. Picture would have been very different if you were still single. so think am well my broda!

@Goldcircle your point is well noted.Thanks bruv!

ifegy:

@ OP, have you considered looking to the US' cousins, Canada? Yes, it's colder, but as a student, your spouse can come over and work while you study, and it is also possible to get a work permit as a student. Not that you are likely to be able to raise all your tuition and living expenses this way, mind you. Also, as a student with work experience you could look at immigrating as a skilled worker. There is also the new Canadian experience class for foreign students. In my experience, the Canadian immigration process is more straightforward than the US's. Check out the Canadian government immigration website, cic.gc.ca, for more information.

@ifegy u know I have actually looked into canada in the past but could not find my profession on the list of needed professions.They seem to always reach cap in no time.The thing about US skools is that u dont necessarily have to make school fees deposit while u are here.U could pay when u land US.I dont know if US has that.If you have experience on how to go about the schooling I would humbly accept your assistance.I arm a masters already so do i still need to do the GMAT exam and all?Revert pls.

The perception of america from prospective emigrants is always different from the realities on ground and the true life experience of those already living in God's own country.
I wish u could get some real life stories shared to put you in the right perspective.

Whatever u decide, start by empowering your wife first so that family upkeep wont be an issue if and when u decide to leave.

Kx:

The perception of america from prospective emigrants is always different from the realities on ground and the true life experience of those already living in God's own country.
I wish u could get some real life stories shared to put you in the right perspective.

Whatever u decide, start by empowering your wife first so that family upkeep wont be an issue if and when u decide to leave.

Thanks bruv!

@ifegy u know I have actually looked into canada in the past but could not find my profession on the list of needed professions.They seem to always reach cap in no time.The thing about US skools is that u dont necessarily have to make school fees deposit while u are here.U could pay when u land US.I dont know if US has that.If you have experience on how to go about the schooling I would humbly accept your assistance.I arm a masters already so do i still  need to do the GMAT exam and all?Revert pls.

Yes inclusion on the list of needed professions is required. Note that the list is updated from time to time (every six months, perhaps? Check the Canadian immigration website). Regarding schooling in Canada, there is actually a thread in the nairalandtravel section, "Travelling to Canada", which is devoted to students applying from Nigeria to schools in Canada, which will have a lot of useful information.
As well, I would suggest checking with the website of the Canadian High Commission in Nigeria as to whether you need to pay full fees ahead of time for your visa application. I know that once a student it is possible to pay fees on a semester basis.
For the GMAT, I believe the score is valid for 5 years, so if you've taken it previously you may still be able to use it. If you haven't taken it before, you are likely to need to do so for an MBA program. The school of your choice should be able to guide you.

my friend america may be a good move for you but know this it is NOT a bed of roses

for those who do well outside nigeria , u usually have to endure hardship for some years
points

1 dont rush

2 empower your wife so she can support

3 phase the movt , u go first madam can join later

4 if u dont have kids yet delay small

5 make sure u do something very relevant

6 dont go to any degree mill cos ur cert will be worthless

I dont know of America but student visa is horribly limited in the opportunities it can offer. You may not be able to get any meaningful employment. Switching to permanent residence permit is not also guaranteed. Why not try any of the visas that grant you full working status. At least you will have a chance to try and look for work without fear.

Again, the realities of yankee is far removed from the "glitterati" so many associate with it. It pretty tough. What skills do you have. What course are you going for. Your current job, what does it pay. Will you earn more in the same job in yankee? Look very well before you leap.

I admire your courage, however you need to serious consider a lot of things before you take this bold leap of faith. You are a married man with a family so you have to include them in the scheme of things. Also think very well, about the course you want to study, MBA in IT will not get you any where in America (unless you had extant exposure here in Nigeria and with an internationally recognized firm) , it might get you a job but I doubt, if it will give you the accelerated career growth you so much desire.

I don't want to discourage you but it is the 'hard and bitter truth'. The American economy is still trying to recover from the 2008 global recession and there is the never ending debt crisis currently on ground. You will be amazed at the kind of jobs that even 'MBAs' do here just to survive.

I will recommend that you look at your options very well and also have a plan 'B' just in case. Finally, if you decide to take the risk and it doesn't work out as expected, don't be ashamed to retrace your steps because frankly speaking, a lot of people Nigerians inclusive, are 'LOST IN TRANSIT' here in AMERICA

BEST OF LUCK!

Friend, it could be the best thing you ever did for your family, but just as you have to work smartly to achieve results in your present job, you need to do same and more to take this step.
If you are lazy and don't want to kick it, then don't.
If the indiscipline in Nigeria has become so 'concretized' in your person that you won't try to change, then don't.
If you are typical about women's role and status both in the family and society, then don't.
If you are and impulsive spender and you are not ready to change, then don't.
If you intend to be so occupied chasing money and other achievement while the tv raise your children, then don't
If sleeping with white women and African American ladies is your life-long dream and you must realize it, then don't
If you must not accept the fact that moving to America requires some fundamental changes that will test your endurance and intelligence, then don't.
Friend if you are willing to and you are sure destiny is beckoning you there, don't listen to anybody, just go. American is better than Nigeria in 1,000,001 ways.

if you are not a doctor or a nurse you better sit your butt in nigeria or na suffer go kill you for america

knorkle2:

wow buzugee don't be angry. be cool

[img]http://2.s01.flagcounter.com/count/fcPpr/bg=ffffff/txt=ffffff/border=ffffff/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=1.jpg[/img][img]http://s01.flagcounter.com/count/fcPpr/bg=ffffff/txt=ffffff/border=ffffff/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=1.jpg[/img]

angry kee ? i am not angry at all. just giving the man sound advice from someone (me) who has bought the t shirt.

keep the cool dude[img]http://2.s07.flagcounter.com/count/DymW/bg=E6E6E5/txt=E6E6E5/border=E6E6E5/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=0/[/img]
[img]http://s07.flagcounter.com/count/DymW/bg=E6E6E5/txt=E6E6E5/border=E6E6E5/columns=1/maxflags=1/viewers=3/labels=0/[/img]

america is e currently in the early stages of a depression not a recession , unemployment is rising and recent american university graduates make up the highest number of unemployed people in america.

In england it is even worse - dont know if you were following the riots that happened here 2 weeks ago, majority of the people involved in the looting were between the ages of 18-25 - again this group is currently suffering very high levels of unemployment.

the only way you would survive in the west now with all this going on is if you have enough money to pay the exorbitatnt school fees that they charge foreign students as well as money to sustain yourself - if not you will end up in a really bad situation, at the end of the day its up to you but it is now fairly obvious that the west is no longer a place where jobs and opportunities abound as was the case about 10 years ago.

We need more information to really give helpful advice. First of all, what is your career. Don't just say IT. Be more specific. Engineering? management? sales? IT is a hot field in general but it is also very saturated with professionals. you need to know whether you can compete with other professionals in the field.

One thing i would advice against though is moving with your whole family at the onset? especially if it's your first time here. You need peace of mind, and freedom to be able to hustle your way into the system. and yes, it will be a hussle no matter how comfortable you are starting out. Unless you have a couple 100Ks to smooth the transition.

Best to test the waters first alone and then make your own decisions thereafter. Some people just cannot cope with certain aspects of life here and until you find out for yourself firsthand, you wouldn't know. Nobody can advice you there.

Overall though i would say go for it. Life is hard everywhere but it's a softer kind of hard here. If you are smart, work hard, and stay away from some bad habits, you will have at least a comfortable average life. Your life is more in your hands here. But it's not an easy life.


Good luck!

beeman80:

Hello House!
I really appreciate you guyz on nairaland and right now i am in a dilemma and some advice from you guyz might be of great help.
I am a young dad, married and upwardly mobile but I want to try my hands on the US student visa so that in the end I might be able to settle there with my Family.
However a part of me is just skeptical due to fears of regrets and all.
Is it a smart move to resign my not too bad job for the US with my family? Will i get a good job offer there to cater for my family as a student and after graduating from the school?
Should I just stay put here and keep managing what Nigeria has to offer(Boko Haram,NEPA,Armed robbers,Bad roads etc) ?
I am begging for answers here.Advice from people who have gone to the US on legal grounds would be most appreciated here.

Thanks in advance!

@beeman80,

First i want to say your God loves you for posting this question here because you can get lots of insight to your question.

First, living in U.S and other foreign countries is not what you think it is,  Hollywood and naija people that come back from there may not tell you, but life is tough, precarious and unfriendly if you make the smallest mistake of just trying to cross over on your own to these countries.

If your company, organization or someone is not sponsoring you i will say it loud don't GO
One if you arrive U.S as a student you can not work until one year of academic study before you can apply for work permit. Although you can be working in school; one, the school job is not guarantee and even if it is, you can only work for 20 hours, its just pocket money that can not even pay for your rent if you live in school or outside the school

Putting your family to this is a real real risk.  Calculate how much you will spend in buying tickets for you and your family not to talk about paying for school fees,  you mean there is no investment, business that you can use all that money for?
Common i think if you are wise enough to dream about american dream, you should be wise enough to dream about nigeria dream with the amout of  money you want to go gable with,  Its like putting all your money in a lotto or pool, better still modernize lottery.

My friend stick to your job in Nigeria, use that money to invest in property and you will continue to collect rent every month or every year and that is one of the permanent investment that you might not get even after studying in these western countries,  There is no doubt you could travel there and make it,  But if i tell you about huge number of Nigeria students stranded in U.S not to talk about U.K you will open your mouth,

Don't enslave your life forever.  Stay in Nigeria. Plan, invest and you can make it if you put that passion, belief and prayer into action

OP

You dont even have your full tuiton fees, Who will pay for your accommodation? Many international student always assume they will get a job immediately they register at university- very optimistic way of looking at it. You can end up six months without a part time job, how will you feed you wife and kid?

beeman80:

Thanks! However do u think it would be wise to live my job and "test the waters"? Are u actually in the US?Are there good opportunities for me after i must have been done schooling?Whats it like working and schooling in the US?Is the pay okay to cater for the family and foot school fees?

You want to use student earning to pay school fees and cater to your family, it is as if you are calculating the money into naira!

, and be ready to do menial jobs - of the lowest category in order to survive. Unless you got a rich family there in US, its not easy to get started without doing all the shitty jobs while you get stuff into place.

There is no shame in labour. A lot many guys arrived and looked down on brothers doing security, cleaning or even care work (bum cleaning). They gave up and joined the bandwagon after their pocket money finished six months later.

In summary, dont be choosy. Get a job (any job) immediately. Then get your act together and start working towards your goals. Yankee can be a very lonely place with everyone working non stop and phones turned off. Its really a culture shock when you first arrive.

cicero:

Friend, it could be the best thing you ever did for your family, but just as you have to work smartly to achieve results in your present job, you need to do same and more to take this step.
If you are lazy and don't want to kick it, then don't.
If the indiscipline in Nigeria has become so 'concretized' in your person that you won't try to change, then don't.
If you are typical about women's role and status both in the family and society, then don't.
If you are and impulsive spender and you are not ready to change, then don't.
If you intend to be so occupied chasing money and other achievement while the tv raise your children, then don't
If sleeping with white women and African American ladies is your life-long dream and you must realize it, then don't
If you must not accept the fact that moving to America requires some fundamental changes that will test your endurance and intelligence, then don't.
Friend if you are willing to and you are sure destiny is beckoning you there, don't listen to anybody, just go. American is better than Nigeria in 1,000,001 ways.

Spot on brother!. . . You're surely a thinker. Stay bless.

I think with what everybody has said. U have to re-consider ur plans. It's better here than to regret in America.

Take care.

my b

cicero:

Friend, it could be the best thing you ever did for your family, but just as you have to work smartly to achieve results in your present job, you need to do same and more to take this step.
If you are lazy and don't want to kick it, then don't.
If the indiscipline in Nigeria has become so 'concretized' in your person that you won't try to change, then don't.
If you are typical about women's role and status both in the family and society, then don't.
If you are and impulsive spender and you are not ready to change, then don't.
If you intend to be so occupied chasing money and other achievement while the tv raise your children, then don't
If sleeping with white women and African American ladies is your life-long dream and you must realize it, then don't
If you must not accept the fact that moving to America requires some fundamental changes that will test your endurance and intelligence, then don't.
Friend if you are willing to and you are sure destiny is beckoning you there, don't listen to anybody, just go. American is better than Nigeria in 1,000,001 ways.

What a wise man, you be real Cicero. 
My padi, ask yourself these questions and answer them truthfully without deceiving yourself.
Also consider your age and that you will need to adapt to a new system a lot different from what you've come to know and that you already have people who depend on you.

Based strictly on the information you have provided I give you "my" opinions.

A quick story/joke. Rich American CEO went on vacation to a small fishing village in Mexico to get away from it all and relax. He is lounging there with his other rich buddies watching this "poor" Mexican Fisherman sitting in front of his hamlet watching his kids play while drinking a Corona (beer).

Rich CEO asked him "Fisherman, why aren't you out fishing"
Fisherman "I already went fishing in the morning Senor, I already caught enough fish to feed my family, keep some for tomorrow, and sold a few for money."
Perturbed, the CEO retorted "Man, there are more fishes out there, you can catch more, you can get a fleet of boats, hire more people to fish for you, set up a distribution enterprise"
Fisherman "What for, what can I gain"
CEO "Then you can become rich so you can retire early, move to a paradise and enjoy your life with your children"
Fisherman "I am already relaxed, I am living in a small fishing village that is paradise, you came here after all Senor and I am enjoying my kids - so Senor, I think I am already rich by your definition, Si?"

My short answer, stay in Nigeria. Make it work.

Instead of leaving Nigeria maybe you can think Entrepreneurial and have Mrs. BeeMan80 manage that one while you continue working and growing at your cool job.

I am not going to lie to you and my viewpoint differs from others already on this thread, the US is a beautiful place to live, but it comes at a price. We have social services. There is a team of professional and highly trained medical personel that will rush at breakneck speed to save my life by just dialing 911 on the phone, there's  a team of highly trained police officers that will come to my aid 24/7 just by calling them (no brining the Commissioner), so it is relative.

So to close, as Men we have to do what we have to do, but if you really have a cool job in Nigeria as you stated, I would just make it work but your Wife is part of that equation.

Jah Guide.