Konjiboii:
All this plenty headache over a simple matter, she is a good woman by every description you just gave, don't ruin your home over a miniscule thing. My advice for you is to stay with your wife and kids , but wet you dick outside once once. For your sanity sake. It's easy to divorce but it have a nasty ripple effect that it's better to just cheat las las.

Nigerians and blackmail ehn!!! She is a "good" woman who can't offer him what he needs the most. How is she "good" for him? If she is good for you, take her. She is not "good" for OP so let him set her free.

Don't divorce nor leave your children please, their future is very important.
Please take second wife!
Even if you are a Christian God is not against second wife (some pastors are only deceiving us), but He hate divorce.
Helikanah His servant has two wives.
God himself gave wives to David
Bro Paul advised Pastors and Bishop to marry one wife, it means members are allowed to marry more than one if needs be.

My advice to some sisters is that if you wish to be Rev. sister please don't marry (go to seminary) and stop putting brothers into unnecessary troubles, Ashewo are women like you, they service 10 men daily without complains.

This case is becoming too much in the Church nowadays, especially among 40+ to 50+ wives. many brothers are dying in silence.

Some Pastors /brothers have not been having sex for more than a year, just because of wicked wives, who knows they cannot sleep with another women.

Kobojunkie:
Oh come on! Not you too! How is adultery commonsense where marriage is concerned? What happened to the so-called morality-upright Nigerians who claim they are better than other races were morals are concerned? It seems the decay is deeper than even the eye can see.

Divorce is the legal and commonsense approach in this situation, yet over 95% of posters here don't seem to see that. That should be a marker to reveal how severely damaged marriage culture in Nigeria truly is.

Divorce is not the option here babe.
He has the option of getting a side chick outside.
This man never said anything bad about his wife.
Since his high libido is the la cuna here,let him opt for side chick of high maintenance and he's good to go,it's a win win for all.

Kobojunkie:
Nigerians and blackmail ehn!!! She is a "good" woman who can't offer him what he needs the most. How is she "good" for him? If she is good for you, take her. She is not "good" for OP so let him set her free.

I get your sarcasm kobo

desgiezd:
One fact you need to know is that no marriage is perfect. If you divorce your wife and you are not marrying again, what happens if you keep dating the wrong ladies. Here's a lady who's not giving you problems and she also has good attributes according to you. Find a way to manage your wife and also consider your children. The effects on the children will be immeasurable. Both you and the lady may not be able to find happiness after the divorce.
Be wise and keep your wife. Millions of men are wishing they could have someone like her.

Wrong! Kids benefit nothing from watching Daddy and mummy live like complete strangers in the house. Studies show that the damage that kind of setting does is about the same as that a terrible divorce wrecks on them. So please, let's not use kids to blackmail people into staying in uncomfortable marriages.

How Staying in an Unhappy Marriage Can Affect Your Children

Acidosis:


You're the du m.b one, clearly. Your earning is useless if it doesn't reduce the burden and workload in your home.

Stingy criminal.

Preach it!


I reject these type of stringy criminals for my daughter in Jesus name, AMEN!


My daughter will marry a cheerful, philanthropist like her father. She will marry a man that is ready to spend to make life sweet and easy for her at all time.



I wonder the useless project our Nairaland Mr Project is doing that he earns 700k and spend only 100k on his family, God forbid bad omens like this

The problem is probably in you, you are just using yr wife to make a guard
Sex issue can be solved if proper step are taken....you are an adult I don't need to explain that much or you visit marriage counselor to train u on that

On the part of you staying alone forever and something is actually going wrong in yr humanity....Cox normal hman being cannot stay alone forever...

Kobojunkie:
Does it matter what she has to say at this point? Marriage isn't meant to be a prison sentence for anyone including OP. So why una dey try force am when he don check out tay tay!

As usual, quick to jump to a conclusion without research. You are obviously paid to be here.

“Life is Short. Make Sure You Spend As Much Time As Possible on the Internet Arguing with Strangers.”

Caaz:
I get your sarcasm kobo

I am being serious abeg! This woman has "wasted" 13 years of her life catering to a man whose only guiding light comes from his dick and he is still not able to have deeper affection beyond that for her. She needs to free herself so she can love herself with all that energy, and her kids of course.

Kobojunkie:
I am being serious abeg! This woman has "wasted" 13 years of her life catering to a man whose only guiding light comes from his dick and he is still not able to have deeper affection beyond that for her. She needs to free herself so she can love herself with all that energy, and her kids of course.

I rest my case

The problem is probably in you, you are just using yr wife to make a guard
Sex issue can be solved if proper step are taken....you are an adult I don't need to explain that much or you visit marriage counselor to train u on that

On the part of you staying alone forever I think something is actually going wrong in yr humanity....Cox normal hman being cannot stay alone forever...

RALPHOW:
Don't divorce nor leave your children please, their future is very important.
Please take second wife!
Even if you are a Christian God is not against second wife (some pastors are only deceiving us), but He hate divorce.
Helikanah His servant has two wives.
God himself gave wives to David
Bro Paul advised Pastors and Bishop to marry one wife, it means members are allowed to marry more than one if needs be.

My advice to some sisters is that if you wish to be Rev. sister please don't marry (go to seminary) and stop putting brothers into unnecessary troubles, Ashewo are women like you, they service 10 men daily without complains.

This case is becoming too much in the Church nowadays, especially among 40+ to 50+ wives. many brothers are dying in silence.

Some Pastors /brothers have not been having sex for more than a year, just because of wicked wives, who knows they cannot sleep with another women.

Having a second wife is as good as divorcing your first wife lol cos the children of your first wife will still be stigmatized by your new wife who will be your favorite lol




The best way to handle this is to have temporary side chicks who must not be with you for more than 2 years max. In fact you must never date any girl beyond 1 year if you are still married (does sign of the cross)

He's Mr bond007

franchasofficia:
Preach it!


I reject these type of stringy criminals for my daughter in Jesus name, AMEN!


My daughter will marry a cheerful, philanthropist like her father. She will marry a man that is ready to spend to make life sweet and easy for her at all time.



I wonder the useless project our Nairaland Mr Project is doing that he earns 700k and spend only 100k on his family, God forbid bad omens like this

Caaz:
■ Divorce is not the option here babe. He has the option of getting a side chick outside. This man never said anything bad about his wife. Since his high libido is the la cuna here,let him opt for side chick of high maintenance and he's good to go,
■ it's a win win for all.

Divorce is not but adultery is? Come on... when did we fall so low as a people?

2. He has said enough bad about his wife which is that she is not the best fit for him. She may be "good" wife material for you but obviously not for him and what he wants. What you are doing amounts to forcing marriage on him which is to blame for the damaged state of marriage across Nigeria.

3. Wrong! Kids benefit nothing from watching Daddy and mummy live like complete strangers in the house. Studies show that the damage that kind of setting does is about the same as that a terrible divorce wrecks on them. So please, let's not use kids to blackmail people into staying in uncomfortable marriages.

How Staying in an Unhappy Marriage Can Affect Your Children

He has bn secretly looking for ways to divorce the woman and had all these planned out.

YUSTECH3:
The problem is probably in you, you are just using yr wife to make a guard
Sex issue can be solved if proper step are taken....you are an adult I don't need to explain that much or you visit marriage counselor to train u on that

On the part of you staying alone forever I think something is actually going wrong in yr humanity....Cox normal hman being cannot stay alone forever...

A woman is instigating him to do all these.imagine a man with high effing libido staying alone...naa not possible

Sincerely l felt ur pain. Most single does not know what u are saying. It is painful when u do everything and when u ask her for just once a week for sex and she says No.

IT IS TIME WE START PREACHING ABOUT SEPERATION not DIVORCE.

Get an apartment and stay there. Dont divoce. Marrying most nigerian lady is like taking someone from motherless home. Immediately she born the number of children she want, she lock up. I know what l am saying. I rest my case

Kobojunkie:
Nigerians and blackmail ehn!!! She is a "good" woman who can't offer him what he needs the most. How is she "good" for him? If she is good for you, take her. She is not "good" for OP so let him set her free.

To fvck na small thing, na when you don enter street you go realize say to find a woman who can manage the home,take care of kids and still cook hard die. Fvck when dey everywhere like pure water satchet..You know nothing

If you were the op will you do same to your husband Kobo?

Kobojunkie:
Divorce is not but adultery is? Come on... when did we fall so low as a people?

2. He has said enough bad about his wife which is that she is not the best fit for him. She may be "good" wife material for you but obviously not for him and what he wants. What you are doing amounts to forcing marriage on him which is to blame for the damaged state of marriage across Nigeria.

3. Wrong! Kids benefit nothing from watching Daddy and mummy live like complete strangers in the house. Studies show that the damage that kind of setting does is about the same as that a terrible divorce wrecks on them. So please, let's not use kids to blackmail people into staying in uncomfortable marriages.

How Staying in an Unhappy Marriage Can Affect Your Children

His complains are trivial.
Funny enough this woman may be in church right now praying for her foolish husband without knowing that oga have secretly prepared to divorced her.
Chai uwa.

When trouble sleep
Yanga go wake am
Waking him dey find
Palaver, he dey find
Palaver, he go get-e o)
Palaver, he go get
Palaver


When cat sleep
Rat go bite him tail
Waking him dey find
Palaver, he dey find
Palaver, he go get-e o
Palaver, he go get
Palaver



Don't go look for wahala

Konjiboii:
■ To fvck na small thing, na when you don enter street you go realize say to find a woman who can manage the home,take care of kids and still cook hide die. You know nothing

All that no matter as OP don taste marriage come decide say him wan go "free willy". Marriage no be prison. Let's stop pretending it is meant to be that.

Konjiboii:


To fvck na small thing, na when you don enter street you go realize say to find a woman who can manage the home,take care of kids and still cook hard die. Fvck when dey everywhere like pure water satchet..You know nothing

Nothing dey for street,nada kaka.

I usually don't get into topics like this and I don't know how it showed up on my feed but I have an experiment I would like to try. I just want to see something

Op, making what you make you probably have about a week of vacation time available, correct? If that's the case, take a week off.

During that week, let your wife just focus on that "small" job that she has and go about her day like you typically do. She will just work and come home and make family decisions or whatever else it is you do. You in turn, go about her daily routine for the week. Kids, clothes, laundry, food, side hustle etc. You do this on the same budget. At the end of the week let's hear your thoughts on this topic again. I'm dead serious.

Second, I'm just going to say that if she was a virgin when you married, her views and feelings about sex were almost ENTIRELY shaped by you...

Caaz:
■ If you were the op will you do same to your husband Kobo? His complains are trivial.
■ Funny enough this woman may be in church right now praying for her foolish husband without knowing that oga have secretly prepared to divorced her. Chai uwa.

Do what exactly? Forget the idea of marriage given you by your parents. Marriage is meant to be a relationship between two individuals who see eye-to-eye on things. When that ceases, it is no longer a marriage but a cage, a prison. Why would I want to enslave another human being all so I can hold on to a Married title? God forbid!

2. That one na foolishness on her part though since God does not answer any such prayers in your churches to begin with. This glorified image people have of marriage is all of fantasy, created by your cultures and religions. It does not mirror the reality of human existence and behavior and ought to be abandoned in the trash where it belongs. I mean look at the fact that you are suggesting adultery in marriage to this man here as evidence of this.

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

My wife does the same thing. I simply cheat and we both are good

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

I will advise against divorce and I want to commend you for your faithfulness. Your marriage can still be salvaged going by my experience in a similar situation and I have been married for more than 24 years. The twp of you should go for counselling and see a sex therapist. You can contact this woman Olawunmi Esan ( Olawunmiesan@gmail.com) whi is a certified counsellor ànd sex therapist.

Where is the place of effective communication, do a personal and sincere introspection on what went amiss, be accommodating and tolerating, renew your commitment and be conscious of what spice up the romance. Pls don't divorce

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

Acidosis:
You no try, sir. You earn 700k and all you have to spend on your family with kids is 100k every month, leaving your wife to cook, clean, wash, do nanny work and market runs, and probably still do her regular job, and you expect her to give you hot sex? With which energy, please? The same energy you could have preserved by spending extra 50k on a good cleaner or cook?

Give yourself a heavy knock on the head.

Get out, how much do you make in a month?
Did the wife complain about the upkeep money oga?
Na the op brought this up on himself to sort for advice from NL that's full of somany knuckle heads that can not even manage a home like this moniker, instead of giving advice (if you have any) you're complaining of the upkeep money on the wife's behalf.
The born of contention is lack of intimacy which the man has tried so much to endure for a long while now,which I feel it isn't enough to just let go off the marriage,but an unemployed and ogogoro person like you is busy calculating how much he should have been giving the wife,I don't think you should put mouth in this Matter,go to politics forum and comment, that's where we find something that looks like a human being venting out there frustration on each other.

franchasofficia:
Having a second wife is as good as divorcing your first wife lol cos the children of your first wife will still be stigmatized by your new wife who will be your favorite lol




The best way to handle this is to have temporary side chicks who must not be with you for more than 2 years max. In fact you must never date any girl beyond 1 year if you are still married (does sign of the cross)

Side chick is fornication
Marry second wife and pay her dowry

In all u do, avoid divorce for the sole reason of sex. Sounds ridiculous

Coolcat001:
■ My wife does the same thing. I simply cheat and we both are good

I hope if you find out the reason your wife hasn't been giving you sex is that she has also been cheating on you, you wouldn't mind too.

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

Oga good woman no dey outside oooo,I warned you now.
If she's not cheating on you with those excuses, I will advise you get side chick and act along,it will save you alot.
Getting a new wife won't solve the issue I swear.
Get yourself one small young girl and make sure you go with your sense to protect yourself at all times.
Also make it known from the onset that na only knacking period,thanks me later

ADURA123:


I am not divorcing to remarry, I want to be alone and be free. Thank you

In other words you want to start doing Sina upadan.

Ibere weyrey ree ooo