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How Long To Propose - Romance - Nairaland

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10 Signs He's Not Going To Propose Marriage / Is It Ever Okay For A Woman To Propose To A Man? / What To Do When He Is Taking Too Long To Propose (2) (3) (4)

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How Long To Propose by nene1: 10:13pm On Nov 27, 2011
Okay, I have a random question for those guys in a SERIOUS relationship with a girl. Generally, how long would you think it is about right before you ask for a girl's hand in marriage. I am a bit old fashioned and I usually have a 6 month rule. I only date for marriage. If a guy hasn't brought me to meet his family by then or show any signs that he may want a future with me then I would not continue with him. Well I mean I will still continue to talk to him, but if another guy shows interest I will also consider that one as well. After 6 months (no sex either, sorry I am muslim), without any proposal or at least introduction to his family, I will stop making our relationship exclusive. I do not want to be with a guy for years and still no ring. I am only 21, but I would like to get married ideally before 30. I mean in a few years I will be done with school and time flies. I haven't really started dating seriously yet, but it as just a thought I had. Does it sound too extreme? I thought of giving him a year. I do not want to scare him off and of course it is nothing I will blatantly tell a guy.
Re: How Long To Propose by Yorisb: 10:16pm On Nov 27, 2011
nene1:

Okay, I have a random question for those guys in a SERIOUS relationship with a girl. Generally, how long would you think it is about right before you ask for a girl's hand in marriage. I am a bit old fashioned and I usually have a 6 month rule. I only date for marriage. If a guy hasn't brought me to meet his family by then or show any signs that he may want a future with me then I would not continue with him. Well I mean I will still continue to talk to him, but if another guy shows interest I will also consider that one as well. After 6 months (no sex either, sorry I am muslim), without any proposal or at least introduction to his family, I will stop making our relationship exclusive. I do not want to be with a guy for years and still no ring. I am only 21, but I would like to get married ideally before 30. I mean in a few years I will be done with school and time flies. I haven't really started dating seriously yet, but it as just a thought I had. Does it sound too extreme? I thought of giving him a year. I do not want to scare him off and of course it is nothing I will blatantly tell a guy.

Really? U go ''shop 4'' men taya then - hope u're ready
Re: How Long To Propose by tellwisdom: 10:51pm On Nov 27, 2011
And the funniest part be sey, dis kain gurls no dey FINE sad sad.
Re: How Long To Propose by Mynd44: 12:48am On Nov 28, 2011
You are still young. You will soon learn
Re: How Long To Propose by kelz88(f): 3:07am On Nov 28, 2011
6 months?!  shocked LMAO!  grin
I don die.  cheesy


Please 6 months is still a very short time to know someone.

Like Mynd said, you are still young. You will soon learn the way it [b]actually [/b]works.
Re: How Long To Propose by Ranoscky(m): 6:50am On Nov 28, 2011
nene1:

Okay, I have a random question for those guys in a SERIOUS relationship with a girl. Generally, how long would you think it is about right before you ask for a girl's hand in marriage. I am a bit old fashioned and I usually have a 6 month rule. I only date for marriage. If a guy hasn't brought me to meet his family by then or show any signs that he may want a future with me then I would not continue with him. Well I mean I will still continue to talk to him, but if another guy shows interest I will also consider that one as well. After 6 months (no sex either, sorry I am muslim), without any proposal or at least introduction to his family, I will stop making our relationship exclusive. I do not want to be with a guy for years and still no ring. I am only 21, but I would like to get married ideally before 30. I mean in a few years I will be done with school and time flies. I haven't really started dating seriously yet, but it as just a thought I had. Does it sound too extreme? I thought of giving him a year. I do not want to scare him off and of course it is nothing I will blatantly tell a guy.
And so [b]f[/b]uck what? Muslim girls no dey [b]f[/b]uck again? undecided
Re: How Long To Propose by Andrew3(m): 7:04am On Nov 28, 2011
Why are all intensities laid on the NO SEX PART, Does it mean there are no guys who can date without sex?
Guess am the only one. grin grin grin grin
Re: How Long To Propose by Mynd44: 7:23am On Nov 28, 2011
^^
You obviously attend the same church as Sexsinners
Re: How Long To Propose by Andrew3(m): 8:07am On Nov 28, 2011
Mynd_44:

^^
You obviously attend the same church as Sexsinners
lol, it aint no church thing, its all about abstaining from nyashing. angry angry angry
Re: How Long To Propose by Nobody: 11:30am On Nov 28, 2011
if after 2wks max, i dont Bleep a girl who claims to be my gf, then to hell wit her,no time for consideration. OP I only wish u get what u want in disneyland. . .
Re: How Long To Propose by Nobody: 11:43am On Nov 28, 2011
[size=14pt]It's not about how long it takes you to propose, it's about how long you know the person, and how well you know the person. If you erroneously use 6 months as your minimum, what if the person was just beginning to like you? You cant have it all you know. . .[/size]
Re: How Long To Propose by kpolli(m): 11:58am On Nov 28, 2011
That's a bad attitude to have while starting a relationship. . . it wud backfire
Re: How Long To Propose by iice(f): 5:10pm On Nov 28, 2011
A guy proposes when he's ready. You cannot time that.
Re: How Long To Propose by Flashaldrin(m): 5:14pm On Nov 28, 2011
tellwisdom:

And the funniest part be sey, dis kain gurls no dey FINE sad sad.
shocked shocked shocked
Re: How Long To Propose by BCuZiMBlaCk(m): 6:50pm On Nov 28, 2011
sexkillz:

[size=14pt]It's not about how long it takes you to propose, it's about how long you know the person, and how well you know the person. If you erroneously use 6 months as your minimum, what if the person was just beginning to like you? You cant have it all you know. . .[/size]
surprising as it is coming from you
Re: How Long To Propose by Mynd44: 9:19pm On Nov 28, 2011
By the time the OP is 32 with no options, she go change sharp sharp
Re: How Long To Propose by nene1: 12:53am On Nov 29, 2011
sexkillz:

[size=14pt]It's not about how long it takes you to propose, it's about how long you know the person, and how well you know the person. If you erroneously use 6 months as your minimum, what if the person was just beginning to like you? You cant have it all you know. . .[/size]

True
Re: How Long To Propose by nene1: 12:54am On Nov 29, 2011
Btw, I didn't say I would dump him, but I would just open my options to other guys. Btw, sex does not make a guy love you. It might actually make him have less of a reason to commit if you are even lucky enough to get him to commit at all. That is why you have women dating men for 5 years, but cannot get that ring. I mean, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
Re: How Long To Propose by Ranoscky(m): 1:41am On Nov 29, 2011
nene1:

Btw, I didn't say I would dump him, but I would just open my options to other guys. Btw, sex does not make a guy love you. It might actually make him have less of a reason to commit if you are even lucky enough to get him to commit at all. That is why you have women dating men for 5 years, but cannot get that ring. I mean, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
Hey, listen and listen up. . . Sex is the major 'key' involve in r/ship today. NO man is ready to be with a girl that won't submit after every-every.

The quote below is an example:

[quote tiniyata]
if after 2wks max, i dont bleep a girl who claims to be my gf, then to hell wit her,no time for consideration. OP I only wish u get what u want in disneyland. . .
[/quote]
So, u better think twice.

But, u girls are soo f[/b]ucking funny somehow. Is it only the guys that enjoys it when being intimate together? ONLY IN NIGERIA that girls think

they'r doing guys a favour, when being intimate! Well, now, u'r stil young. Hope u wont realize it after u have turned 35, and no serious approach.

nene1:

[b]That is why you have women dating men for 5 years, but cannot get that ring.
And, do u think without sex, that r/ship would last for that 5yrs?

[quote author=nene1 link=topic=812486.msg9652530#msg9652530 date=1322524480]
I mean, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
And who is ready to give u the milk for free?
Re: How Long To Propose by Nobody: 1:46am On Nov 29, 2011
Ranoscky:

Hey, listen and listen up. . . Sex is the major 'key' involve in r/ship today.


[size=14pt]Damn WRONG! You could say Most Relationships though, i'll agree, but generalizing that? Hell to the fccking NO![/size]
Re: How Long To Propose by Natasha2(f): 1:53am On Nov 29, 2011
tellwisdom:

And the funniest part be sey, dis kain gurls no dey FINE sad sad.
LMAO *falls from ladder* grin
Re: How Long To Propose by Ranoscky(m): 2:00am On Nov 29, 2011
SK, ma guy, nobody z generalizin here, but in a case where 'majority' of the r/ship today, depends on sex, then am safe to say that it's 'almost' all, but not!

If she'll be able to find the right man that would truely love and marry her without sex for this Twenty Eleven??, then 'bestest' of luck to her!
Re: How Long To Propose by Natasha2(f): 2:07am On Nov 29, 2011
Ranoscky:

SK, ma guy, nobody z generalizin here, but in a case where 'majority' of the r/ship today, depends on sex, then am safe to say that it's 'almost' all, but not!

If she'll be able to find the right man that would truely love and marry her without sex for this Twenty Eleven??, then 'bestest' of luck to her!
for there to be relationships living on sex then there must relatuonships living without sex its as simple as that jeez
Re: How Long To Propose by Ranoscky(m): 2:18am On Nov 29, 2011
^ And I never said there isn't, jeez.
Re: How Long To Propose by Jenifa1: 2:38am On Nov 29, 2011
@ OP

the only advice I can give you is to go for older guys. you say you are 21 but looking for a marriage. then go for guys in their late 20s and early 30s. chances of seeing proposal by 6 mths is higher that way. esp if you have a good attitude, decent and young but with a mature mind. 6 mths is short for formal proposal but I agree with this part of your post. it should happen by 6mths


If a guy hasn't brought me to meet his family by then[b] or show any signs that he may want a future with me[/b] then I would not continue with him.

again, for your type, go for mature guys who tend to be older.
although there are some older guys in their 30s who still act like 18. likewise there are younger guys in their early to mid20s who have mature mind of a husband-to-be.

like they say "stand for something and you will fall for nothing. stand for nothing and you will fall for anything"
keep your goals and values and trust me it will keep you focused.  you may end up tweaking your plans a bit. but as long as you have a starting point and goal then you should be set.

goodluck
Re: How Long To Propose by Nobody: 2:53am On Nov 29, 2011
I know one muslim girl wey her name na Fatimatu and she dey always wear hijab.One day for class her handbag fall by mistake and the thing come open and cartons of condom come throway from the bag in the full view of the public grin.Who say muslim girls no dey do yanshing na lie dem dey talk.Me sef don do many muslims girls grin
Re: How Long To Propose by MissTake: 12:42am On Nov 30, 2011
Personally, I would like to know a guy for at least 2 - 3 years before proposal. I feel that life is too short not to know who you're going to spend the rest of it with properly. And no sex in to 2 - 3 years either. The guy must be accepting to this rule, and must think the same way. This is the first thing I will tell him and he can leave if he isn't accepting. Maybe I'm a little different from you - I'm not looking to get married before 30, and in fact marriage/kids aren't a priority for me - I'm quite accepting of the fact that marriage isn't for everyone. I've had a few quick proposals in the past, but I haven't been convinced that the guys involved where not just looking for a "beautiful wife to show off with", so I've turned them down. Spending the rest of your life with someone is more than just good looks.
Re: How Long To Propose by Ranoscky(m): 1:21am On Nov 30, 2011
Very easy to say, but hard to come by.
Re: How Long To Propose by Jenifa1: 5:09am On Nov 30, 2011
MissTake:

Maybe I'm a little different from you - I'm not looking to get married before 30, and in fact marriage/kids aren't a priority for me - I'm quite accepting of the fact that marriage isn't for everyone.

yes you are different. lol

nice advice
Re: How Long To Propose by Nobody: 5:56am On Nov 30, 2011
hmm 6 month rule ke grin
and if the naija babe come see say i get three cars with a big house the rule go come turn to 2 month rule.Na by force to marry u sef grin grin grin grin
Re: How Long To Propose by blank(f): 11:59am On Nov 30, 2011
Pls, follow ur heart. Do not let these people discourage you. The important thing is for him to have the same mindset. Do not date someone who believes that dating is for fun. Date someone who believes that dating is to find that partner that will end in marriage. In 6 months, d guy already knows if he will marry u or not. That he does not propose does not mean he does not know though i will suggest u make it 1 year.

I had your mentality when i was entering first year. I believed that any dating should lead to marriage. When i started dating my first and only boyfriend after knowing him for a year, my girlfriends laughed at me and told me that he was taking me for a ride, how can a 21 year old (just cos he is in final year) be talking marriage and u believe him. Fast forward a couple of years and out of my group of 8 friends, we are just 2 that are married and we married our university boyfriends. Because before entering that relationship, we weighed them if they were husband material and if they were marriage minded. Dating for the fun of dating is crap.

About the no sex before marriage, i hope u get ur wish.
Re: How Long To Propose by Jenifa1: 12:48am On Dec 01, 2011

Dating for the fun of dating is crap.

I agree. I find it [i]stu[/i]pid.

and I co-sign with dating someone with similar mindset. there are many guys out there looking for a life partner although they are not common.
by 6-mths you shld definitely know if marriage is on his mind for both of you.

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