fro laudate
Richyblack, just save your breath. This is known as the 'beating-around-the-bush' tactic. We can all read between the lines!

So pathetic! must you always be the referee? God! too much of every thing makes people sick, stop phucking sucking up, I almost puked.

@adeniyi88:

talk to the girl directly and let her know how you feel about what she said. Ask why she said it.

i think some people r so ignorant nd very clossed minded, like some yoruba people saying they cant marry igbo people or vice-versa, same wiv hausa nd bla bla bla, i aint saying u shouldnt be morally behaved, but come on this is d 21st centurey we gotta me acceptable of other peoples culture, hopefully people of this generation would be more open minded and not be bloody ignorant, God dnt like ugly, lol( nd i dnt mean that literally)

i guess because nigeria has a large amount of different tribes and diversity. so they try to stick with own.

its really unfortunate situatn.am presently servin as a couper in ogun state.my xperience here is really depressin;if u
dnt speak yoruba u r out of the game mostly in d office.i know this scourge cut across all tribes but its 2much wit d yorubas.pls we all shd b obligated 2 eradicatin it 4m our ethnical tribes.we r all NIGERIAN and shd work in one heart.
-rob

iyererob:

its really unfortunate situatn.am presently servin as a couper in ogun state.my xperience here is really depressin;if u
dnt speak yoruba you're out of the game mostly in d office.i know this scourge cut across all tribes but its 2much wit d yorubas.please we all should b obligated 2 eradicatin it 4m our ethnical tribes.we r all NIGERIAN and should work in one heart.
-rob

. . . perhaps there should be a local lingua franca.

Tribalism is like racism, or bigotry. Don't blame your forefathers or foremothers or wotever. Blame yourself for being so narrow minded.

NINETOFIVE:


So pathetic! must you always be the referee? God! too much of every thing makes people sick, stop phucking sucking up, I almost puked.

SOL----------_{screaming out loud}----LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!   You made me puke too.  Why are you picking on him? Is Laudate your main contribution to the topic?

Dsampler:

Tribalism is like racism, or bigotry. Don't blame your forefathers or foremothers or wotever. Blame yourself for being so narrow minded.

Amen to that!

Hehehe. . . . .almondjoy, gimme a hi-five jare! You are da bomb!

Hi Laudate!---Hi five!  Where you dey since?  It has been so boring without arguing with you oh!  Take time oh! Just disappear like that! Don't mind these bullies!   You know I gat your back!  I can wait for you to catch up around here so I can have a good time as usual.  Welcome back!

Being openminded,means u don't judge people based on the color of their skin,religion,creed,belief,tribe etc.There is really no barrier,except what we humans conjure in our imagination.After all we breath the same air and bleed the same red blood,we make a mockery of God's work and His essence when we reason otherwise. "ONE LOVE".
shushu i really will love 2 meet u in person,if it's fine by u,this is my mail add bufo2001@yahoo.com

Being openminded,means u don't judge people based on the color of their skin,religion,creed,belief,tribe etc.There is really no barrier,except what we humans conjure in our imagination.After all we breath the same air and bleed the same red blood,we make a mockery of God's work and His essence when we reason otherwise. "ONE LOVE".
shushu i really will love 2 meet u in person,if it's fine by u,this is my mail add. bufo2001@yahoo.com

O ma se o. anyway we are all into this, In Ghana here, my igbo friend at school is happy to meet other nigerians but IGBO people. can you imagine that even outside your country you want to meet ppl from your tribe not your country

The answer to the post is "motion."

bumax:

Being openminded,means u don't judge people based on the color of their skin,religion,creed,belief,tribe etc.There is really no barrier,except what we humans conjure in our imagination.After all we breath the same air and bleed the same red blood,we make a mockery of God's work and His essence when we reason otherwise. "ONE LOVE".
shushu i really will love 2 meet u in person,if it's fine by u,this is my mail add. bufo2001@yahoo.com

i don't get the part, were u said " u don't judge people base on the color of their skin" as far as i know. Nigerians don't have different skin color,

I happen to come from a very mixed background, paternal grandparents are from Akwa-Ibom and Cameroun, maternal grandparents are from Lagos island and the west Indies.as a result, i never belonged ANYWHERE. It got worse as i grew up especially because i could only speak English.
I was crucified from all angles.Imagine standing in a long queu waiting to register for NYSC (camp), university,common entrance and the likes of it and when you get to the front, the person screening sees your surnname (ibibio surnname and a yoruba first name) and starts to speak, ibibio. I don't understand a word and i say so, and i receive the insults of my life, typically  it goes like this
1.shame
2.your father married YORUBA
3.you can't speak youar language
and they leave you standing there and not attending to you.

On my mothers side- i was always omo yomirin.

as time went on, i tried to learn ibibio, but whoever was to teach me, always got so annoyed "that i did not understand" and stopped teaching.

then i started to learn yoruba-folks teased me, called me omo igbo and all sorts, but it was better than learning ibibio.

I used to dread association with either tribe at a stage, but later on toughened myself and became non challant about the whole thing.

Today i understand yoruba very well, relate to ibibios well also (and can even mimick the accent)- you definitely learn to do that after years of hearing " YOU MEAN YOU don't SPEAK YOUAR FATHERS LANGUAGE, SHAME"

and also educate both ends when they say something negative about one another.In all i have learnt to stay on top of the situation,you can do the same.Only little minded people discriminate.

cheers

I don't think people understand how extremely bush tribalism can make them appear. Just plain bush. As if they're still in the predawn of civilization.


Nothing harder than a thick head, for real. And yet people go on as if they're the ones who invented the tribe they claim they're from.

hmph.

and I noticed the people who always try to make others feel bad about their mixed heritage, are usually the really bush ones, with such a primitive mindset. Yet for some reason, instead of working on their exposure and trying to get a veneer of sophistication, they tend to dump their personal issues on others? And seem to think the mixed kids are easy picking?

for not talking 2 d guy again, shows how immature she is. even if she doesnt want a yoruba guy, it doesnt prevent them from being friends.

its so unfortunante but tribalism will remain with us 4 a long time. people from certain cultures in nigeria tend 2 behave alike but even if they do, we should 1st appreciate one as an individual b4 his tribe.

i have very good friends that are not igbo, like me but ive learnt 2 appreciate them n tolerate their shortcomings and they mine. i believe thats what friendship is all about.

so its not about tribe but how unique each individual is.

Because we didn't chose to be together which caused us to clash hence why there is:
[size=18pt]Ethnocentrism[/size]

ezeagu:

Because we didn't chose to be together which caused us to clash hence why there is:
[size=18pt]Ethnocentrism[/size]

sorry, wrong answer.


Racists didnt choose to live in the same country with blacks. Does that justify their attitude.

tpia:

sorry, wrong answer.


Racists didnt choose to live in the same country with blacks. Does that justify their attitude.

Er, I was replying to why there's ethnocentrism in NIGERIA, plus it's not an answer it's an opinion.

ezeagu:

Er, I was replying to why there's ethnocentrism in NIGERIA, plus it's not an answer it's an opinion.

true.

So you think Nigerians are tribalistic? Come to Kenya!!!!!! Kenyans are the worst tribalists alive.

First thing's first, I haven't read through the entire topic. How can I, with such little time and you all typing up such long posts. . .

Anyway. I want to ask, in all of this, has anyone even yet bothered to define tribalism in this discussion? So far, it seems as though the discussion isn't about "tribalism". Rather, it seems as though you all are talk about prejudice and ethnocentrism. By the definitions that I'm familiar with, tribalism is nothing more than having a strong sense of identity with one's ethnic group and feelings of loyalty towards one's tribe. There's nothing wrong with that. What it seems like to me, is that the issue is with stereotyping, prejudice and suspected ethnocentrism that comes about as a result of people not being knowledgeable about other tribes. By definition, I am a tribalist. I don't see anything wrong with identifying with my ethnic group and having loyalty towards the tribe that I come from.

Long story short, we need to define what we're talking about here before we continue talking about it. I don't know if anyone else has already proposed that (and I wouldn't know because I haven't yet read through the entire topic).

ChinenyeN:

First thing's first, I haven't read through the entire topic. How can I, with such little time and you all typing up such long posts. . .

Anyway. I want to ask, in all of this, has anyone even yet bothered to define tribalism in this discussion? So far, it seems as though the discussion isn't about "tribalism". Rather, it seems as though you all are talk about prejudice and ethnocentrism. By the definitions that I'm familiar with, tribalism is nothing more than having a strong sense of identity with one's ethnic group and feelings of loyalty towards one's tribe. There's nothing wrong with that. What it seems like to me, is that the issue is with stereotyping, prejudice and suspected ethnocentrism that comes about as a result of people not being knowledgeable about other tribes. By definition, I am a tribalist. I don't see anything wrong with identifying with my ethnic group and having loyalty towards the tribe that I come from.

Long story short, we need to define what we're talking about here before we continue talking about it. I don't know if anyone else has already proposed that (and I wouldn't know because I haven't yet read through the entire topic).

this is what's being discussed here (if you read the original post):

Why are Nigerians tribalistic?

I met a chic when i just started working in my office, we got a a little close and when she found out that i was Yoruba, she stopped talking to me. I later overheard her telling a fellow Igbo collegue that she didn't know i was Yoruba, considering that i am light skinned.

I did read the original post. Now my question is, has anyone even thought to consider the situation surrounding her decision? Maybe the girl wasn't looking for a Yoruba guy? Maybe she's not interested in making friends and is primarily interested in a relationship with another Igbo. . . who knows? This one instance (with so little background information) isn't enough to judge prejudice and ethnocentrism. Sure she's being tribalistic [by definition] by preferring her own tribe, but is anything wrong with that? I just think people: 1) are reading too deeply into this, and 2) Are focusing more on her decision to not talk with adeniyi83. If adeniyi83 could thoroughly explain the situation with as much background information as possible, and answer any questions we may have, we then can maybe pass judgement on that situation.

As for Nigerians being tribalistic. . . I feel that we generally are.

Why are Nigerians tribalistic?

I met a chic when i just started working in my office, we got a a little close and when she found out that i was Yoruba, she stopped talking to me. I later overheard her telling a fellow Igbo collegue that she didn't know i was Yoruba, considering that i am light skinned.

That is pure tribalism clear and simple. There is no other way to explain that unless Ajeniyi edited the story to suit himself like Chinenye pointed out. I still can't understand why she should stop talking to him just because he is Yoruba, that's my concern with this story. She can still be talking to him and still maintain her tribalistic sentiments in her heart. She has a right to choose whomever she wants as her bobo only that she should know that those she ostracized because of their tribe or religious affiliation do not necessarily care or give a damn about her damn choice. Tribalism is deep seated in Nigerian culture. My childhood friend is fighting with his parents now because he wants to marry an Esan girl. I am presently dating a Yoruba girl, her father hates me so much that he can send assassins to nail me even after i paid his recent huge hospital bill that saved his life. He has a big round prying eyes that sends chills up my spine anytime i see him but i will break him through with prayers one day.

Dude, in this generation Yoruba parents are more open to inter tribal marriages than the others.

Maybe he's glaring at you cos you keep trying to shake his hand.

Berra learn to prostrate.

It has nothing to do with prostrating or whatever because i do that very well. The girl do confide in me on her dad's sentiments and all that and his initial comments when he met me for the first time outlandish . I understand about many parents being open about it but there are still some that are closed about it and my potential BIL is one of them. I like him though because he is not a closet tribalist just that I try to harp on the ills of tribalism because it hurts so much when you are at the receiving end of it. I am sure my parents are not any different but their religion is seriously limiting them to what they can do or not because i remember my mom saying things like "is it not better to find a woman around here so we can easily trace her families history".

Aloy.Emeka:

I still can't understand why she should stop talking to him just because he is Yoruba, that's my concern with this story.

This is the real issue in this discussion. It becomes more of a problem because we do not know if she stopped talking to him simply because he is Yoruba, and people just want to hop on and straight away pass judgement.

Now, although I am one person, I'll use myself as an example to illustrate something. Say that I am a dot at the center of a paper. Draw a circle around that dot and label it "close friends". The people within that circle that surround me (the dot) are my closest friends and they are from all kinds of backgrounds. Draw another circle around the circle labled "close friends". Label that circle "Associates". These people are people that I see and greet, say "hi" to at the mall when I pass by them, friends of my close friends, people that I work with or school with. Our relationship usually won't extend past that moment when we are face to face, and even then we don't really engage in much dialogue. These people are from all kinds of backgrounds, but the majority are from my ethnic group. Now draw another circle around that labeled "Associates" and label the new circle "Others". These people are those that I do not associate with at all (ie. People I do not know, people that I don't personally like for who they are and how they behave, etc.). They are from all backgrounds, walks of life, etc. If anyone were to see me outside the house with anybody, it would most likely be someone from the category "Associates". This person is also very likely to be from my ethnic group, but we are not going to be talking as if we're close friends. We will probably be standing or sitting somewhere (because we just so happened to bump into each other) and exchange a few words then continue on with our life. So if someone were to see me on a normal day, they will misinterpret my actions the way the girl was misinterpreted (assuming that there's more to the issue than what adeniyi83 posted).

This is an example of what might be the situation surrounding the girl that stopped talking to adeniyi83. Even this "stop talking" issue. . . I find it hard to believe that she just straight up ignored him after finding out he was Yoruba. Again, I do not know the situation surrounding the issue. All in all, I see nothing wrong with tribalism. I only see the incorrectness of what people do to one another in the name of tribalism.

ChinenyeN:

This is the real issue in this discussion. It becomes more of a problem because we do not know if she stopped talking to him simply because he is Yoruba, and people just want to hop on and straight away pass judgement.

Now, although I am one person, I'll use myself as an example to illustrate something. Say that I am a dot at the center of a paper. Draw a circle around that dot and label it "close friends". The people within that circle that surround me (the dot) are my closest friends and they are from all kinds of backgrounds. Draw another circle around the circle labled "close friends". Label that circle "Associates". These people are people that I see and greet, say "hi" to at the mall when I pass by them, friends of my close friends, people that I work with or school with. Our relationship usually won't extend past that moment when we are face to face, and even then we don't really engage in much dialogue. These people are from all kinds of backgrounds, but the majority are from my ethnic group. Now draw another circle around that labeled "Associates" and label the new circle "Others". These people are those that I do not associate with at all (ie. People I do not know, people that I don't personally like for who they are and how they behave, etc.). They are from all backgrounds, walks of life, etc. If anyone were to see me outside the house with anybody, it would most likely be someone from the category "Associates". This person is also very likely to be from my ethnic group, but we are not going to be talking as if we're close friends. We will probably be standing or sitting somewhere (because we just so happened to bump into each other) and exchange a few words then continue on with our life. So if someone were to see me on a normal day, they will misinterpret my actions the way the girl was misinterpreted (assuming that there's more to the issue than what adeniyi83 posted).

This is an example of what might be the situation surrounding the girl that stopped talking to adeniyi83. Even this "stop talking" issue. . . I find it hard to believe that she just straight up ignored him after finding out he was Yoruba. Again, I do not know the situation surrounding the issue. All in all, I see nothing wrong with tribalism. I only see the incorrectness of what people do to one another in the name of tribalism.

The OP's simple and straightforward post  has nothing to do with what you just typed, plz. Maybe you meant to post on another thread.

we got a a little close and when she found out that i was Yoruba, she stopped talking to me. I later overheard her telling a fellow Igbo collegue that she didn't know i was Yoruba, considering that i am light skinned.

I don't understand what you mean by my post not having anything to do with what adeniyi83 posted. I gave an example about how my behavior can be misconstrued as "negative tribalism" given the context that adeniyi83 gave in his initial post. I also mentioned that given the limited information that adeniyi83, there is no way to actually pass judgement on the situation because we do not know how that girl lives her life and/or what her intentions were.

Take my example of me and put me in that context. I only engage in conversation when there's something that I need from someone or need to do with someone, or if I'm interested in that person (keep in mind that my preference is my ethnicity). If that person (adeniyi83) is an associate (someone from work, school, friend of friends) and I find out that the individual in question (adeniyi83) isn't who I'm looking for, then I won't really associate the way I intented to associate. Adeniyi83 would then just fall back into the the ranks of associate and dialogue occurs only when I see the person and greet. If it were me in question rather than the girl, adeniyi83 would still post the same kind of post based on limited information, inferring that I did something bad. I'm just not interested anymore because adeniyi83 cannot offer what I'm looking for. Does that make any sense?

This all goes back to me suggesting that "tribalism" in this dicussion needs to be defined. If me not associating with adeniyi83 the way I intended because he cannot offer what I'm looking for is tribal, then it is tribal. I won't argue that. Does that make it bad, though? No. The main problem that I'm having with this discussion is that people equate tribalism with the concept of something bad. If tribalism is something bad, then state why it is bad. I'm only here trying to really understand what people are saying and what people mean. Words are just tossed around without being defined and it isn't helping the discussion.

.