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Stats: 1077063 members, 1265611 topics. Date: Thursday, 20 June 2013 at 02:50 AM
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Sagamite(m): 12:19pm On Feb 01, 2012|
I dey, babes. Just been quite busy.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Sagamite(m): 12:21pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Shut up with all this religious junk.
Sky Rider, you never fail to display it.
What is this rubbish you wrote?
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by tpia@: 12:23pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Tenibaby has said it all.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by tpia@: 12:27pm On Feb 01, 2012|
if you're happier being alone then by all means stay alone until you're ready to marry, if that time ever comes. Of course people will pressure you to settle down etc but if you dont want to, its not by force. After a while they'll leave you alone.
As per your mum's list- tall order because if you're not religious then you shouldnt really be dating a religious person.
On the beauty thingy- men from families where most of the women are beautiful, actually tend to not place physical beauty too high on their list of requirements for a partner. After all, nothing new there.
Just my observation, could be wrong. I'm referring to the yoruba setting of course.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by adelegan1: 12:32pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Marriage will only make you poor and uninteresting. na so so money women know. Imagine make house wife they call aristo for money say because her husband no dey give enough money. I beg no marry. Women just expect alot from guys this days
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Wislet(f): 12:37pm On Feb 01, 2012|
eGuirrella & moremi2008- examples of men no woman should touch with even a six feet pole.
With such mentality toward marriage, sorry for whoever marries you.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Wislet(f): 12:40pm On Feb 01, 2012|
@ sagamite, I'll wipe ur behind if u dnt take time
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by kizito96(m): 12:41pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Marriage is worth it except yours is not working
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Sagamite(m): 12:43pm On Feb 01, 2012|
I think you meant whip.
If you will wipe it, I will put a ring on your finger now. Good wife.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by 12 inches!(m): 12:53pm On Feb 01, 2012|
I don't see anything wrong in what the op is saying, Thank God many girl's are learning, at least most of my girl friends are, Nobody just wants the extra baggage of marriage anymore, Ladies better get educated and find a job cos u have to contribute something to the union, This is the 21st century,
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Wislet(f): 12:56pm On Feb 01, 2012|
too busy to cal huh?
@opribo, don't say that dear. There are still great women around. Just ask God to lead you to one. A wonderful marriage is possible, even in this generation. Not everyone has lost it or forgotten how it should be done
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|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by pro01: 1:30pm On Feb 01, 2012|
It is ludicrous how some ladies here (predictably) would have us believe that not having a wife is necessarily tantamount to loneliness. Maybe you need to realise that being alone is not necessarily the same thing as being lonely. Why some of you like simplifying everything into two extremes (black OR white) is something I would never understand. Certainly, life is more complex than that.
Hilarious isn't it? One would think that the above quote is actually entirely applicable to rich, single females who would eventually find out that their personal success is worthless without a husband or a Stedman kind of 'handbag' to validate them. But for a rich man? There is hardly such a thing as a 'lonely' old rich man. . .unless he has deep issues and despises female company.
No rich old man that loves women can ever be starved of beautiful female company - even without a wife. Ever heard of mistresses? Live-in-lovers? A million and one sweet women of all ages would be at a rich old man's beck and call ANYTIME he needs someone to ask him "if his feet [and 'third leg'] are warm". Not to mention countless beautiful maids, nurses, and female aides he can have around him attending to his every whim 24/7. He doesn't need to be officially married to any of his mistresses for him to get all the company he needs. Heck he could even have a harem for all he pleases. Let's not kid ourselves here.
'Loneliness' (especially for a successful man of ANY age) has NOTHING to do with lack of a wife. Only a psychologically or spiritually troubled man of that kind would be lonely (and that would even be his personal choice) - all the better for him 'cos he'd probably be dead anyway if he had a wife to nag the living-daylight out of him.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by chaircover: 2:08pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Oh my goodness where is all this “A wife will bleed me dry financially” coming from. Haba!!
Not one of my friends relies solely on her husband’s money. Every single one of my friends work. My mother worked and so did my grandmothers. Walk into any hospital, market, shop, school, canteen, govt office etc and you will see women working their socks off. Surely these women are married to men. Even illiterates sit over their kerosene lamp and sit by the road at night selling bread, fruit, fish etc to bring their own share down to support the family.
Yes there is a minority of women who feel that their husbands have to provide their every need but they are certainly the minority, just as we have a minority of lazy men who expect their wives to provide for their every need.
So give us some credit abeg. And the ones living in Diaspora shouting my money my money, seriously how much do you have left every month after the tax man and the bill man had taken his cut?
If you don’t want to marry, then fine but state the real reason, which is fear or commitment.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by jay bee(m): 2:10pm On Feb 01, 2012|
chaircover:Minority in the real world appears to be the majority on NL. Maybe just maybe most of them are still living in wonderland
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by coogar: 2:23pm On Feb 01, 2012|
that is a big lie from the pits of hell.
there are good women out there albeit few who would even do more than their grandparents as far as marriage is concerned.
if you are not meeting this type of women, then change your modus operandi and stop visiting whorehouses and red light districts to search for a life partner.
there's what we call prenuptial agreement if you don't trust your partner wholeheartedly.
even if you feel entering such contract cheapens your spouse, go to nigeria and marry. the law of the country where the marriage certificate is issued would be followed - regardless of where the divorce took place. do wives get 50% in nigeria should she file for a divorce? i don't think so.
this is why you should know who you are marrying.
i am not ignorant of these facts - trust me, i know a great deal about women independence, women empowerment and the other indices but there are women out there ready to stick it through thick and thin. that you are yet to find one does not mean they don't exist.
except that there are fertilizers to cure infertility and there are pesticides to cure infections of plant.
a fact known very well to good garderners.
i won't even discourage you from carrying your plan through. . . . you actually have a point.
however, some men are still out there who are catching the very last breed of the ideal women left on the planet.
seek and you shall find. . . . . . .you might end up meeting 50 before you find that special one but keep trying and your valiant efforts shall be rewarded.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Wislet(f): 2:31pm On Feb 01, 2012|
@coogar, thanx honey. An example of a great man
Now where's lefulefu, Mr cork, etc. Learn from ur bro.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by hispinkolo: 2:36pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Marriage is a choice.Some have made it and are extremely happy to have someone to share their lives with and children to boot.Some are gnashing their teeth because of the financial and emotional toll it has taken on them.
Everyday,there's news about some dude killing his ex-wife or a wife cutting off little jonny,the list is endless.I don't blame anyone who is scared.
Some chicks are mentally unstable,some will not date a man who is not loaded.The newest trend is whoring wives,i went on a blog this week,enough exposure! Married women sleeping around for money in Lagos,Abuja will be dog eat dog.
Since most people are only thinking of assets on here,i will say every guy should be careful.Even if you sign a prenup,it can still be contested.Bottom line,she must leave with something.If thunder faya u and she has kids for you,you are eternally finished.
The institution is not for everyone,a relationship is hard enough.Take Grandpa Hugh Hefner he tried marriage and it failed then he decided to live solo with babes servicing him.He may be the ultimate playa to some guys,and to others he's a lonely old bugger(to me,he looks miserable).Shrivelled old viagra ravaged ding dong,he has to pay the babes to keep them there
Society(speaking for naija only) has drummed it in from the start that marriage is what makes a person wholesome,so you've gotta tow the line to please the parents.One of my consultants,about 40 years old, fit male refuses to marry and has told his parents to leave him alone.Another one said no one wifed his mother,why would he wife another person's child.He prefers to be fed grapes by a young babe when he's vacationing in St Lucia.All great men and very accomplished.The only thing i have found they both have in common is lack of belief in organised religion and great cynicism
To each his own,it's not worth it to some.To the others,they wouldn't have it any other way.For me,marriage is what you make it.If you go pick a girl that her convo is only about peruvian hair and gucci bags,what do you expect?You think that when she is ready to leave she will just go meekly without wanting to maintain the lifestyle?Every guy should be walking around with a gold digger or ho alert bracelet then.
The good ones are plenty,unfortunately,they may not look as hot or as flashy as the leeches.
NB in some places,after shacking up with someone for a couple of years,she is entitled to a sizeable chunk.Damned if you do,damned if you don't.happily married female by the way.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Long One(m): 2:57pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Oga, I am a bit worried about you because you have outdated notions of marriage. Nobody is EVER going to get a marriage like their grandparents except they live in a remote village in Damaturu. The social insitution of marriage is dramatically different from what it used to be and cultural expectations are also vastly different.You raised valid points there, albeit a bit depressing.
Having said that, the difference between you and me is; I know I need to get married. From your last paragraph, the title of the thread should be ‘Marriage is not worth it for guys’ as you are not asking a question, rather looking for people to support your conclusion of ‘a wayward lifestyle is the way to go, as marriage has too many risks’.
Moreover, do I smell a ch-ch-chicken somewhere? lol
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Claus(m): 3:15pm On Feb 01, 2012|
It's been tempting to turn this into a men vs women argument.
Taking a step back, I do see a trend of guys not wanting to get married. I have about 5 male cousins in their late 30's/early 40's who have never been married. That would have been unheard of a generation ago where all my uncles were married by their early 30's (most before 30).
So the sentiment the poster is sharing is real with many guys. I can see why a lot of ladies here have become defensive, but that defensiveness just smothers what many men consider to be a real issue.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Claus(m): 3:33pm On Feb 01, 2012|
In summary, one major (but not the only) aspect of this topic is that many guys are no longer interested in women that just want to "marry up".
The issue is not so much that women don't work (most of the ladies I know work). It's more to do with the fact that either by design or coincidence, a majority of women marry men with significantly more economic resources.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by ronkebp(f): 3:34pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Some wise men and women have spoken on this post, especially Coogar's first post, and Chaircovers' analysis.
A kolanut/bitter kola tree/plant cannot bring forth pineapple or straw berries, the bitter-kola hangs out with other bitter- kolas', apples hangout with apples, when you go to a produce junction, you would see apples in one basket, pineapples are together, potatoes are together.
You cannot see yourself as a responsible man and hang out with LovePeddlers and expect a ''good wife'' from one of them.
You cannot hangout all day in the club or beer parlour where you would tap the yansh of the peppersoup seller,or hit on the bar-tender wearing only bra and g-string to serve you don-pereon (or whatever you call it) and exepct to get a classy wife with self respect.
If you see marraige as a problem, it would remain a problem to you. If you are afraid of a gold-digger, so you will not marry, eat your money alone!!!!! after all you suffered for it. save the world the stress of your reasons behind not marrying and remain SINGLE
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by zilon12(m): 4:21pm On Feb 01, 2012|
the essence of marrying is so that people will call you responsible
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by fred2265: 4:49pm On Feb 01, 2012|
For me, marriage is no different that being in a monogamous unmarried relationship. It is just bureaucracy and conformity and has no impact on a genuine loving relationship.
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by dayokanu(m): 5:05pm On Feb 01, 2012|
No be small thing ooo
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by pro01: 5:06pm On Feb 01, 2012|
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by emmalexabl(m): 5:13pm On Feb 01, 2012|
WHY marry. . just to make ONE WOMAN HAPPY, when u can remain SINGLE and make LOTS of THEM(women) HAPPIER. .!!
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by mordi4evah: 5:32pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Some thread o! *smh and rotflol @ crazy comments esp d rebutt on d muslim quote,kai! Buh on a serious tip,evry1 is entitled t his/her opininon abt life,marriage and so on,live it hau U̶̲̥̅̊ wanna,its urs!!
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by ronkebp(f): 5:48pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Where is this mentality coming from, who says marriage is to ''make a woman happy''??
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by jenny b: 5:53pm On Feb 01, 2012|
i guess u r from a broken home or u r gay!
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Sagamite(m): 6:02pm On Feb 01, 2012|
Nelly, one more time: He's right you know. Heeee's right!
It makes me laugh when I see women choosing selective words to make you feel you have to do what they want you to do.
He is irresponsible because he is not married.
He fears commitment because he does not want to settle down.
Are men suppose to do what you want to prove he is a man with balls that has no fear?
Let me correct your English. Why not try:
"If you don’t want to marry, then fine but state the real reason, which is lack of interest in commitment."
"If you don’t want to marry, then fine but state the real reason, which is refusal to commitment."
"If you don’t want to marry, then fine but state the real reason, which is exercising your right not to commitment.
Which one be fear? You chose that word to make it be like our masculinity is challenged?
|Re: Is Marriage Worth It For Guys? by Claus(m): 6:16pm On Feb 01, 2012|
True dat! An aversion to commitment does not equal fear.
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