~Killz~:

^^^
Do you agree that even after falling in love with you cos of your future prospects, and when that future comes and you are still broke, you arse is dumped?

zerocool:

Calm down, dude. Your post was titled "Love, Money & RELATIONSHIPS" and not "Love, Money & MARRIAGE". They are two different ball games.

In the 'future', you will be working, married with kid(s). But at present, you are most likely depending on your parents for your needs, so don't think the lady is not aware of your circumstances (except you are into cyber crimes or illegal activities that fetch you money).

I can tell you that if she is in a relationship with you for temporary pleasures your money can give her, she is definitely in love and in serious relationship with another guy she doesn't demand from and she can plan her future with.

Well i think i'm leaning towards serious relationships that will lead to marriage. . . Getting into relationships and expecting not to spend is not realistic. So when you use the money for your upkeep and spend on a lady, who's losing? Cos in the example you gave, she has someone else. How would you feel if she decides to plan her future with the other guy? Are you saying you are in support of a lady being in a simultaneous relationship? And then, don't you think it makes more sense to wait until you are "ready" to test relationship waters?

MarcAnthon:

I agree with the theme of your piece, Killz. But I think we should all understand that heartbreak is not necessarily a bad thing. Telling a guy to wait until he's through with school and is comfortable and ready to settle down before getting into a relationship is stretching it a bit.

Your reason, that the girl may leave him after school to settle down with someone who's ready to get married, while true in some cases, is not universal.

Not universal agreed. But it's mostly obtainable these days and you cant really tell what the outcome will be, so i'll advise caution.

MarcAnthon:
The poor guy who has kept away all the while and faced his books and became successful may just find himself emotionally immature to handle a relationship successfully, thus leading to failures in this regard. Heartbreak hurts, but it teaches also. It's a learning curve that most people necessarily have to go through to become emotionally mature for future relationships.

Just my two cents.

Hehe. Funny you almost swayed me there with immaturity to handle a relationship. What is the guarantee that leaving his books and chasing a serious relationship would prove his emotional maturity?
There's something about this heartbreak stuff. if you are a relationship newbie, and i advise you, why would you insist on going through a heartbreak to confirm what i earlier said? Whatever happened to learning from the mistakes of others? I don't really believe you have to go through a heartbreak to become emotionally mature. I don't need to allow a car hit me before i know i can get hurt!  What of those that did not go through one, and are mature? I agree it teaches, but it's not compulsory, Worst hit are those that vehemently refuse to learn from the experiences life throws at them. . .

Thanks!

zerocool:

@killz: I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my
wallet. . .

Above, is your signature on nairaland. Continue with this 'spending' mentality and the probability of you marrying a LovePeddler is pretty high.

killz! i think i know u,  ur name is Mute u wrote some article of this nature on FB, after u left ur girlfriend for no reason,
all becos u felt u cld not meet her needs. and this is a poor girl who does not make any demands on you.

u dumbed her becos she has no job and u dont have any either,  you were looking for an easy wayout.  
becos your conscience wldnt let u be, u decide to write a long note on your lame excuse of dumping your faithful loving girl friend
so u can get other pple's view and be relieved of ur sin if one or two pple agree with you. ur lazy Bottom had no reason to work!

mute!! do you now have a job? i can see you have write ups on leadership, i wonder how some one who can not keep a quiet simple girl like ur ex-girl friend will become as a leader.  mute go and get a job and stop washing ur dirty linens in public

freecocoa:

^^Omo you have make me forgot what i wants to said.

tpacalipse:

The fact that u have a steady income today does not mean u can't lose it after marriage! And for the fact that a man does not have steady income today does not mean He can't have it after mrriage!

And who the fffffk or where the fffkkk did you get the idea that a man must provide verything in marriage? or relationships? Read the BIBLE very well to confirm (Proverbs 31 from Verse 1-the end), u will understand.

Did the bible ask you to go into a marriage empty handed? (1Timothy 5 vs 8 ) "Certainly if anyone does not provide for those who are his own, and especially for those who are members of his household, he has disowned the faith and is worse than a person without faith."

A lot of our fathers got married to our mothers when they had no ffking dime, worked together and today some of them are very rich. Is money really the problem in marriage and relationships? So, are u saying that those who had steady source or sources of income before they married, should divorce if they happen to lose this or these sources of steady income? In short, the ways people come around to analyse humans is very funny! Humans can not be analyse this way or these ways.

To me, if 99.9% of Nigerian women will not stay or marry you for lack of steady income, there is 0.1% who can stay irrespective of whether u have steady income or not and this 0.1 percent to me, matters a lot. I will strongly advice any man to please start dating when you are still broke, if you wait untill you are ok, u might end up with one of these gold digging daughters of mad men. Your chance or chances of meeting a thief when you are already comfortable is greater than when you are not. I strongly recommend this to all men in the house: date when you are broke, date when you are broke; ignore this rule at your own PERIL. I warn you again, IGNORE @ UR OWN PERIL.

True! But since you are not sure if she's among the 0.1% how about being on the safer side? Commonsense entails that you plan ahead. Does dating when you are broke make sense? I prefer playing broke, than being actually broke!

Lugbenga:

I really lyk dis topic,may God bless d moderator.dis is exactly wat hav been happenin to me,dere dis girl dat i'm dating.i'm spendin 4 her,but i'm not gettin i derserve from her.which true luv,i want to be luv,i want som1 dat w'll truly luv me.

vinmol:

killz! i think i know u, ur name is Mute u wrote some article of this nature on FB, after u left ur girlfriend for no reason,
all becos u felt u cld not meet her needs. and this is a poor girl who does not make any demands on you.

u dumbed her becos she has no job and u dont have any either, you were looking for an easy wayout.
becos your conscience wldnt let u be, u decide to write a long note on your lame excuse of dumping your faithful loving girl friend
so u can get other pple's view and be relieved of ur sin if one or two pple agree with you. ur lazy Bottom had no reason to work!

mute!! do you now have a job? i can see you have write ups on leadership, i wonder how some one who can not keep a quiet simple girl like ur ex-girl friend will become as a leader. mute go and get a job and stop washing ur dirty linens in public

@OP, in Nigerian scenario, you are very correct. Its just that you are always a coward, always too afraid to say the truth whether it will make you unpopular or not, you just like twisting the truth to win ovation, and in so doing, always afraid to say the plain truth, which simply MEANS: LOVE IN NIGERIA = HOW MUCH A MAN HAS, SIMPLE! Becos if we take this to an international level, you are a big poo! you know why? At least you watched TITANIC, and saw how real love was demonstrated irrespective of MONEY OR NO MONEY, how many Nigerian ladies of today can do what Rose did in titanic? NONE!

Again, are you mad? don't always think all guys come from wretched home like you, who need to work their dumb unfortunate asss off to please one foolish person called a girl. What am I trying to say? OOPS, i want to get you so MAD lolz.

If you pointed out here that by nature, a man should fend for the woman financially, then why are your dumb ladies still arguing that what a man can do, women can do better? why are they busy occupying positions that some nice guys would have used properly to cater for at least 10 difference girlfriends, and family, and all? why can't they all sit at home like EVE and wait for ADAM to bring food home? And if they must occupy same positions, posts, etc men can, why can't they fend for a man they love? how then do u balance that damn asss your blabbing?

The disadvantages of your proposition:
money = love in Nigeria. only men should be spending in a relationship no matter what.

As a result of the above, which mostly what is obtainable in Nigeria today, ALL RICH GUYS CAN NEVER BE FAITHFUL, WHETHER MARRIED, SINGLE, ENGAGED OR DIVORCED, you know why? Becos we know we are kings with our money, SO SINCE NIGERIAN GIRLS KNOW THIS (THAT IN A NIGERIAN RELATIONSHIP, ONLY THE GUY SHOULD PROVIDE, AND SHOULD BE ABLE TO PROVIDE ALL THAT THE GIRL NEEDS SO AS TO WIN HER LOVE), then why should guys waste their precious time loving only one, when actually they can provide and fend for 50 comfortably, which was how it was in the far back decades in Nigeria, so the ladies in NIGERIA should stop shouting that guys (rich) are bad when they catch or see them dating other girls, it is what our culture, environment, social values (according to OP's post), etc has made us to be. Now, back to my topic: ALL RICH GUYS IN NIGERIA CHEAT! DON'T DOUBT IT, CROWN IT. UP, UP, GET IT OVER!

ichidodo:

Make una no mind diz writer o! Oh! So becuz u manage get smal money u come dey denge pose abi? Luk money e no matta at al 4 corect and strong colabo. Wat wont kil a colabo wil make it stronga, insufficient cash is 1 of dem. Igbo kweenu!

Ok, if una collabo, make una dey chop sand. . . Igbo kwezuo nu!