BoboYekini is that what you do with all those small small girls?? Asiri e tu loni!

Chairman fe gba away o! Kai oyindamilolo! Se won score? Lmfaooooooooooooo!!!

Ishilove: BoboYekini is that what you do with all those small small girls?? Asiri e tu loni!

yes, na my formula be dat, fun awon omoge cinderella

Idowuogbo: Chairman fe gba away o! Kai oyindamilolo! Se won score? Lmfaooooooooooooo!!!

score ke?? Emi omo, obirin meta like me?

^^ Come, Ishi & ID make una take time o!

Speak English jor

Efemena_xy: ^^ Come, Ishi & ID make una take time o!

Speak English jor

Nne,I so so sorryyyyyyy.....

I don't forget body dey yarn Damascus.

I was asking ishi if chairman come play away football and I asked if he scored any goals in d end.

Efemena_xy: ^^ Come, Ishi & ID make una take time o!

Speak English jor

My apologies

We got to Ondo town about twenty five minutes later. I have been to Ondo town several times, but I usually don't go beyond the bank or the market so this was going to be my first time of visiting the town properly.

I forgot briefly that I wasn't in Lagos.

Ondo town, I am sorry to say, is nothing to write home about. Large houses built during the days of my ancestors dotted the town, mixed with a few modern buildings, shops and roadside restaurants. Sort of reminds me of Kwara state where the main action spots are in Ilorin town.

Chairman drove around a little bit, pointed to a few unremarkable buildings, forgettable statues and the Oba's palace and thereafter pulled into a narrow road dotted with potholes. This road leads directly into the centre of the town but I forget the name now.

"Do you like peppersoup?", Chairman asked. When I answered in the affirmative, he told me about a certain Igbo woman who cooked fish peppersoup wonderfully well. The retaurant was located by the roadside. When we got to the restaurant and as soon as we had settled down,the owner came to attend to us. Chairman ordered for drinks and seemed rather amused when I told him I didn't take alcohol. As a rule I NEVER take alcohol when I am with a man, no matter how harmless looking he is, just as my 'date' was.

While we nursed our drinks as we waited for our soup, Chairman gisted me about his family life. His last born was also a batch A corper serving in NNPC, Warri. His daughter was a banker in Zenith bank, Ibadan, another was married, another working in a different state and so on and so forth. His wife was a school principal on the verge of retiring from one of the government secondary schools in the state.

As we chatted, the restaurant gradually began to fill up. It seemed like an African country was playing that day, so people were coming from far and wide to come and watch the match in the restaurant's lone television.

The owner of the restaurant chose that time to bring our order; fresh fish peppersoup.

She dropped it on the table and left.

All eyes turned to us.

I blushed . . . violently. . . .

If blushes could show on negroid skin,my face would have been hued a very bright red. Why on earth did this yeye woman bring the soup now?, I fumed within me. She hadn't brought our order when the place was empty, but immediately the place was nearly full,out pops she with the steaming plates of soup . BLAST


My fresh youthful looks, juxtaposed with Chairman's ancient visage served to emphasise the very wide gulf between our ages.
"Wait", I wanted to scream at everyone, "its not what you think!".
Chairman didn't seem to notice the very frank stares. He washed his hands and dug into the fish. What could I do under the circumstances? I could join Chairman in relishing the fish, that's what I could do. And that's what I did. . With a younger man I would have used the spoon that was served with the soup to small sips,taking baby bites of the fish and wiping my lips delicately with a serviette from time to time. However, this was Chairman, not a spring chicken, so I did as Chairman did:

Use bare hands instead of cutlery.

Crunch and chew fish and bone mercilessly

Drink soup to last drop.


"I like a girl with a healthy appetite and flesh on her bones," Chairman commented when he saw how I was devouring the fish. "Girls of nowadays are too slim", he added further.
"Thank you sir," I said with a mouthful of fish, "I like it too".

Even though I enjoyed the meal, I was relieved when we finally left the restaurant after nearly two hours. I thought the ordeal was over when we left. How wrong I was.

Chairman wanted to run some errands, so he drove me from place to place and wherever we went we were given funny looks. The fact that everyone seemed to know Chairman didn't help matters. Everywhere he went he was hailed. One particular nonsense fellow took one look at me and bellowed raucously "Chairman baba! Baba ni yen". (Chairman na you biko). I was so mortified. I cringed and tried in vain to sink lower into the seat.

To his credit Chairman was a perfect gentleman when we were in the midst of company. When we were alone however, it was a different matter entirely.

Earlier in the 'tour', I had casually informed Chairman that my phone was faulty and the battery was bad, so I was not too surprised when we he pulled in front of a phone repairer's shop and told me to hand over the phone to the technician, I didn't need to persuaded. I handed over the phone sharpaly and proceeded to give him a brief litany of faults where the phone was concerned. I was quite happy because I had been wondering how I was going to service it because I was on the "BR" side of broke.

After the technician had checked the phone, he declared he would need to go and get a certain part in the main market, but as he was very busy, mayhaps I would come another day to collect my phone. Chairman however volunteered to fly a bike to the market to get the part. I was impressed.
Soon after leaving, he came back with the part and my phone was repaired.

When we left, he offered to change the casing of my second phone, and I 'reluctantly' agreed . Getting the casing proved to be a bit difficult so we had to move from place to place, shop to shop in search of it. We moved uphill and downhill, all the while Chairman didn't allow me to walk. I sat comfortably in the car while the baba tramped up and down to the different shops. I couldn't help but marvel at this. No wonder people said older men made better lovers, not that I had any intention of making Chairman my lover. Heaven forbid!

At last we were able to get the casing and after it was fixed, he drove me to a supermarket where I got myself some "small" provisions . This done, we drove back to Wasimi.

On the fairly busy Ondo-Akure expressway, we drove in comfortable silence for a while when Chairman suddenly spoke up.
"Do you like me,Victoria?" (I had lied that my name was Victoria).

My good mood vanished that very instant.

I should have known this was where it was all leading to .

Without even waiting for my response, he suggested a weekend getaway in a classy hotel in Osun state because according to him " I am too popular here".
See this old man trying to be fresh and feel funky with me o,did he think he could handle me!? If I were to handle him, na die be that o. I didn't want to kill somebody's husband, father, and grandfather, and besides his family still needed him even if he wasn't aware of this fact. Besides I don't date married men, heaven forbid!

I didn't voice my thoughts though. Instead I hemmed and hawed, and told him I would "think about it".
"Make sure you think about it o", he said, then placed a thick,hard paw on my knee and squeezed. I jumped. Startled, I quickly pushed the hand away and laughed shakily. I jokingly told the baba to keep his hands to himself. He did. For about two seconds, then the paw was back on my knee. I felt the rage which always seemed to be close to the surface ever since I started residing in Wasimi start bubbling again.

I pushed the hand away again. Chairman smiled a fatherly smile like I was a naughty child and made his hand comfortable, on my thigh this time.

My fury hissed and bubbled.

"Unhand my leg, fiend", I growled darkly

Baba didn't heed.

I slowly, calmly gripped the offending hand and squeezed,hard. I however under-estimated the strength in that wizened old hand. Chairman simply readjusted his hand and squeezed back.

Thus there we were, one young and one old, striving 'mightily' with each other, in a car that was moving at a modest 50km/hr in a 120km/hr road. Any car that passed the cream coloured Mercedes Benz would see two occupants, a stony faced young female and a serene looking old man. If they could look lower into the vehicle, they would see that the hands of these two were locked in a sort of weird combat.

Location of the combat: My Thighs

Suddenly Chairman seemed to remember something. He effortlessly pulled his hand away from my 'iron' grip and started searching for something. Worried, he asked if I would check my bag to see if his phone was inside. I quickly obliged him but the phone wasn't there. I tried calling the phone but surprise, surprise,it was switched off! He must have forgotten it in one of the shops he had entered when he was looking for my phone casing.

He became increasingly agitated,muttering something about 'very important' contacts in the phone. He wanted to turn around but I insisted he drive me to Wasimi first. There was no way on God's green earth I was going to spend more time than necessary in the lecherous old man's company if I could help it, missing phone or no missing phone. Wasimi suddenly seemed so desirable, like Nirvana to a lost soul.

When we finally arrived in the late evening after what seemed like eternity, I practically stumbled out of the vehicle in my haste to put some distance between me and Chairman,and fled without a backward glance. He on his own part didn't even wait for me to fully disembark before he put the car back in motion,the tires even managing to squeal a little as he drove like the devil on wheels on the trail of his beloved phone with the "very important contacts".

When I got to my hut, I met a hot mess at the front of my door. A goat had murdered my waste bin and scattered its remains everywhere. Some things never changed.

Wasimi . . .

Ishi, I don't know what else to say, nothing that you haven't already heard....you ARE a fantastic writer girl!

Keep up the good work and never stop writing

Damn gal!

Am proud of u!

Bravo mama! Bravo!

Wow. ID, Mena, I'm humbled

Thank you for taking the time read my narrative. Much love

In as much as you both enjoyed my little tale, I want to point out that I am still growing as a writer and I have a very long way to go.

I am nowhere near as good as I want to be.

Still yet, thank you both for your kind words, I really appreciate them

Bon travail!
More power to ur elbow.
Keep it coming, sil vous plait.

avicky: Bon travail!
More power to ur elbow.
Keep it coming, sil vous plait.

Merci. I'll do me best,God help me

C'est parfait!

Ishilove:
Merci. I'll do me best,God help me

Amen oh.
My day isn't complete without 'Wasimi Escapades'. And it's kind of bored for me now.
*wink*

avicky:
Amen oh.
My day isn't complete without 'Wasimi Escapades'. And it's kind of bored for me now.
*wink*

Lol. Energy...

Okay let me ginger myself

Gloriagee: C'est parfait!

Why thank you very much, I'm humbled

Nawa o.french teachers akarie umu akwukwo.nice write up dear,enjoyin evry bit o.ndi french a,make i hear 4 una

al dis derailers abi na enemies of progres wey no want make we joy tori,no make me swear 4 una

ichiezubby: al dis derailers abi na enemies of progres wey no want make we joy tori,no make me swear 4 una

Abeg forgive dem for they know not what they do

ichiezubby: Nawa o.french teachers akarie umu akwukwo.nice write up dear,enjoyin evry bit o.ndi french a,make i hear 4 una

Thank you very much sir. I would have continued the narration but my muse is gallivanting about. Guess I'll have to biatch-slap the byatch in order to make her settle down so that I can continue

Biko,pls do,i don sharpen my eyes 4 anoda round of reading

Ishilove:
Abeg forgive dem for they know not what they do

na because of u o.no hard feelings.make d tori dey roll

This is hilarious! Seriously, i could imagine all these events and the conditions of the place. I think my fave point in the series was the description of the arrival. It was crazy funny, I had to laugh out loud (people around me thought i was crazy!)is is

This is good. Diamonds.

senbonzakura_kageyoshi: This is hilarious! Seriously, i could imagine all these events and the conditions of the place. I think my fave point in the series was the description of the arrival. It was crazy funny, I had to laugh out loud (people around me thought i was crazy!)is is

This is good. Diamonds.

Thanks,sir. That one year in that place was one of the most difficult year of my life. I nearly died of loneliness. I will update the Chronicles this night, ive being rather busy. And lazy

Ishilove:
Thanks,sir. That one year in that place was one of the most difficult year of my life. I nearly died of loneliness. I will update the Chronicles this night, ive being rather busy. And lazy

Pls do update. It's quite an age biko,

avicky, you sef too like story-story!

@ Ishilove

Omagare?

Stumbled on this and I've been enjoying it.

Una do well o (and river sef)!

Mein Gott! I haven't read anything this good in a good bit now. Ishilove, the series was awesome. I cackled, gyrated spasmodically in laughter and fairly glowed with mirth as I read. You're gifted, girl. I look forward to reading more of you.

Few mistakes, really very few, so few in fact that I'm convinced that they were typos resulting from delivery of fast-moving powerful imagery with slower fingers. I think you'd find them doing a read-through yourself. They were grammatical in nature.

More power to you girl. And grace with dropping the French too

Ihedinobi: Mein Gott! I haven't read anything this good in a good bit now. Ishilove, the series was awesome. I cackled, gyrated spasmodically in laughter and fairly glowed with mirth as I read. You're gifted, girl. I look forward to reading more of you.

Few mistakes, really very few, so few in fact that I'm convinced that they were typos resulting from delivery of fast-moving powerful imagery with slower fingers. I think you'd find them doing a read-through yourself. They were grammatical in nature.

More power to you girl. And grace with dropping the French too

Oh boi... see as u plaster vocabs give we! U go fear Oxford na!