i am a very shy person. I am ok with so many ladies but those are the ones i feel nothing for except the love i have for every other person. When i see a pretty lady, my heart melts immediately. What i feel is so huge that my ego is crushed under its weight. When i pull myself together and say 'hello' i wouldnt be able to carry on becos i immediately become empty of words. I become like a fool. The last experience was the most embarrasing of all. I hate it so much! I wish i had other peoples heart. I see myself loosing out on beautiful experiences all becos of this 'shy' thaing. I hate my character! Some one pls help.

Hmmmmm, mi dont fink this is shyness o, but loss of self confidence.

How old are you, if you dont mind?

go buy helmet so you can hide in it and talk to them.

gst101: i am a very shy person. I am ok with so many ladies but those are the ones i feel nothing for except the love i have for every other person. When i see a pretty lady, my heart melts immediately. What i feel is so huge that my ego is crushed under its weight. When i pull myself together and say 'hello' i wouldnt be able to carry on becos i immediately become empty of words. I become like a fool. The last experience was the most embarrasing of all. I hate it so much! I wish i had other peoples heart. I see myself loosing out on beautiful experiences all becos of this 'shy' thaing. I hate my character! Some one pls help.

Always have a pack of ori malu in ur pocket . . .

it can NEVER be overcome unless God decides to change you. I know frm experience cos me i dont think i will ever stop being shy so just know that we both have zero hope

jacobscros: it can NEVER be overcome unless God decides to change you. I know frm experience cos me i dont think i will ever stop being shy so just know that we both have zero hope

may be it will never change. But is there a way i can move on despite the 'shy' thaing?
I know i can be the best lover to any lady i fall completely for. This is becos what i feel, is the guarantee that i will be empathetic

that i will show fairness in judgement of issues regarding us

that i will be instinctively and automatically romantic down to the earth

that i will be so ready to give without expecting anything in return not even sex

that even if i argue with her, its going to be with love glowing in my eyes.

gst101: may be it will never change. But is there a way i can move on despite the 'shy' thaing?
I know i can be the best lover to any lady i fall completely for. This is becos what i feel, is the guarantee that i will be empathetic

that i will show fairness in judgement of issues regarding us

that i will be instinctively and automatically romantic down to the earth

that i will be so ready to give without expecting anything in return not even sex

that even if i argue with her, its going to be with love glowing in my eyes.

goodluck in finding a lady that won't mistake ur kindness for weakness. its how evolution has programmed them 4 the sake of survival of the species. Me i have given up hope because i want a hot babe and unfortunately 99.9999% of hot babes are just plain strange.

gst101: may be it will never change. But is there a way i can move on despite the 'shy' thaing?
I know i can be the best lover to any lady i fall completely for. This is becos what i feel, is the guarantee that i will be empathetic

that i will show fairness in judgement of issues regarding us

that i will be instinctively and automatically romantic down to the earth

that i will be so ready to give without expecting anything in return not even sex

that even if i argue with her, its going to be with love glowing in my eyes.

@OP, you can maintain these properties and STILL be confident in yourself enough to speak to another human being...because that's all she is. She poops like you, has dragon-breath in the morning, and her farts probably stink worse than yours.

Shyness is a strength, not a weakness, sum pple interpret it as temprament ; shyness helps u to analze better, u r more knowlegeble, and thus makin u more intelligent. There is always that moment of glory, believe me , d ladies re dying for u to talk to them, n some might even think u a snob. Step up, until u start seeing shyness as a strength, u won't overcome. Trust me, cos I am shy, but married to d best model of a wife, ladies are seeking men like us. Godspeed

I was very shy b4 until an incident hapend to me.......we were driving one night around 8pm when mopol stopped us and asked us to identify our self every one did except me..,.i was shakin, just couldn't talk......he asked me 3 times but i didn't have the confidence....until he gave me a sound slap before i sudenly shouted STUDENT...
Even then, i had to bring my id card to prove it

since then, i say whats on my mind even b4 a question is asked

If you feel that way, then you should try being friends with a girl before asking her out. Like try to bump into her, akara your friends who know her to start a conversation and you come in and stuff

Wen i don high finish wey 3storey building dey like take-away pack 4 my front, shy 4 where? Infact d girl self go tiny like mosquito 4 my eye, all ur good qualities wey u mention so, wen naija chic nack u heart failure u go wise up.

My guy, shyness is overcome with time. So begin today to feel like nothing compares to you in this world and soon you'll become over confident sef.

sadeiyare: Shyness is a strength, not a weakness, sum pple interpret it as temprament ; shyness helps u to analze better, u r more knowlegeble, and thus makin u more intelligent. There is always that moment of glory, believe me , d ladies re dying for u to talk to them, n some might even think u a snob. Step up, until u start seeing shyness as a strength, u won't overcome. Trust me, cos I am shy, but married to d best model of a wife, ladies are seeking men like us. Godspeed

Gbam!!!

lol, for most ppl shyness goes away but if it doesn't use drugs.

gst101: i am a very shy person. I am ok with so many ladies but those are the ones i feel nothing for except the love i have for every other person. When i see a pretty lady, my heart melts immediately. What i feel is so huge that my ego is crushed under its weight. When i pull myself together and say 'hello' i wouldnt be able to carry on becos i immediately become empty of words. I become like a fool. The last experience was the most embarrasing of all. I hate it so much! I wish i had other peoples heart. I see myself loosing out on beautiful experiences all becos of this 'shy' thaing. I hate my character! Some one pls help.

Lmao... Pull yourself together and start practicing..

Chirpse at least two girls every week for 6months, and you'd be fine after that..

^ that might fuck him up even more.

Alcohol was helpful when I was younger (basically 20 and below).

But I think you'll just get better with more practice. Main thing is to not give a sh1t about rejection or an unfavorable response.

engrtee: I was very shy b4 until an incident hapend to me.......we were driving one night around 8pm when mopol stopped us and asked us to identify our self every one did except me..,.i was shakin, just couldn't talk......he asked me 3 times but i didn't have the confidence....until he gave me a sound slap before i sudenly shouted STUDENT...
Even then, i had to bring my id card to prove it

since then, i say whats on my mind even b4 a question is asked

shymmex:

Chirpse at least two girls every week for 6months, and you'd be fine after that..

¿Qué "Chirpse"?

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Chirpse

hmmm.

@ OP... We're on the same page. I am such a shy person. I am 24 and have never asked a woman out before, for the fear of rejection and unfavorable response. No matter how hard I try to give myself confidence, once I meet a lady I just forget what to say, and it makes me feel so stupid. So I just stopped entirely. I try to do other things like play video games and read to take my mind off there. I've never had sex before, don't know what it feels like. But yes I do self service.

Enlightened1: @ OP... We're on the same page. I am such a shy person. I am 24 and have never asked a woman out before, for the fear of rejection and unfavorable response. No matter how hard I try to give myself confidence, once I meet a lady I just forget what to say, and it makes me feel so stupid. So I just stopped entirely. I try to do other things like play video games and read to take my mind off there. I've never had sex before, don't know what it feels like. But yes I do self service.

Wow! U are a late bloomer, but there is hope

jacobscros: it can NEVER be overcome unless God decides to change you. I know frm experience cos me i dont think i will ever stop being shy so just know that we both have zero hope

Niggah STFU if you have absolutely nothing to say..

Op..what you feel is perfectly normal..so many guys including yours sincerely have passed through that phase..I suggest you make the girls your friends first b4 tell them your main intentions..and stop stopping chic on the road..they will embarass you..rather talk to chics you meet in an enclosed place like bank,eatery,bus etc..look clean and smile..hangout often and lastly..stop self servicing..it kills a man's confidence.

Enlightened1: @ OP... We're on the same page. I am such a shy person. I am 24 and have never asked a woman out before, for the fear of rejection and unfavorable response. No matter how hard I try to give myself confidence, once I meet a lady I just forget what to say, and it makes me feel so stupid. So I just stopped entirely. I try to do other things like play video games and read to take my mind off there. I've never had sex before, don't know what it feels like. But yes I do self service.

Ooh, me too am a shy guy and i realise most girls are turned off by shyness. D ones that wouldn't mind shyness are 2 scarce and unidentifiable. Throughout my secondary school and now 200l in univ. i nvr had a gf or went on a date. Am lonely and confused now,i dont know what 2 do. Every1 feel am snobbish cos my shyness nvr let me talk. I must admit i enjoy being shy sometimes bt when i cant have a girlfriend cos of being shy,it bcomes pain.
I do things like browsing,watching movies,reading and mostly playing video game and listening to sad music to reduce my loneliness but evn then i still feel lonely when am less busier.

I wouldn't say you can completely overcome shyness, but there are ways you can possibly limit this trait of yours. Everyone has an element of shyness in him we only try the best way we could to conceal it. Try and start being active in social events, hang out with friends, go clubbing. The exposure will so much help your confidence.
Also endeavour to be friends with guys that womanize, this will give you the feeling that girls are humans like you however pretty and who knows some of these gals might bring their friends along on their visit and you could just be the one to keep her company.
Finally, please for your ego, don't attempt to approach a girl with bad countenance, even if she is Beyonce.

jacobscros: it can NEVER be overcome unless God decides to change you. I know frm experience cos me i dont think i will ever stop being shy so just know that we both have zero hope

#TeamOptimism

Theben: I wouldn't say you can completely overcome shyness, but there are ways you can possibly limit this trait of yours. Everyone has an element of shyness in him we only try the best way we could to conceal it. Try and start being active in social events, hang out with friends, go clubbing. The exposure will so much help your confidence.
Also endeavour to be friends with guys that womanize, this will give you the feeling that girls are humans like you however pretty and who knows some of these gals might bring their friends along on their visit and you could just be the one to keep her company.
Finally, please for your ego, don't attempt to approach a girl with bad countenance, even if she is Beyonce.

But I would suggest a girl wit bady countenance is d best lab rat. I also suffered d same fate and now in that testmode process with lots of womanizers as friends. Call me stupid but yes you can't know d devil's ways if you dnt wine and dine with him. Experience is d best teacher.. If you succed with an ugly looking babe, its so evident you will with a sleek chick plus d gurls you see being so porche can't bare d sight of a clean guy, dey r also shy to a fault and try to cover up with shades of different kind and most especially I'm very busy kinda word.. Brace up bro like I have and you'll get der. With weeks of practice...

Enlightened1: @ OP... We're on the same page. I am such a shy person. I am 24 and have never asked a woman out before, for the fear of rejection and unfavorable response. No matter how hard I try to give myself confidence, once I meet a lady I just forget what to say, and it makes me feel so stupid. So I just stopped entirely. I try to do other things like play video games and read to take my mind off there. I've never had sex before, don't know what it feels like. But yes I do self service.

we have so much in common. But for the wanking, pls curtail it! I am wining

Guys the articles on this website will change your life. Start with this one:

How School SCREWED You With Anxiety And Young Girls… And Getting Your Confidence BACK!:
http://www.seductionscience.com/2011/how-school-fked-you-with-anxiety

You should look into joining Toastmasters. They're an international club and I've heard great things about them. I'm considering joining them too. You could find one near your location, I hope. Many people are afraid of public speaking, even people who usually appear confident. Kimora Lee Simons, Beyonce and Nicole Kidman have all described themselves as being shy. I'm sure there're other people in Hollywood who are as well. I remember watching Kimora's show earlier this year when she had to speak at an event and she was literally shaking because she was afraid of going on stage and speaking to the crowd. This's a successful businesswoman, someone who has made a name for herself and who is always very outgoing on her show. She later admitted that she was terrified of public speaking and had always been, but she did go out to speak that day. She stumbled a few times, but she did it.

In 2nd yr, we had to do a group presentation for a chem class - a class of almost 200 people. I was in a group full of extroverts and to my surprise they were much more nervous than I was. These were people I hung out with once in a while and sat with a few times in class, so I knew they were more out there than I. It was a surprise to see them being fearful of the presentation as well. Some of them were even more worried than I was. When it was our turn I was hella scared, but somehow pulled myself together and ended up getting the second highest mark in my group. A lot of times it is in our heads. Sometimes you think you can't do something, you would surprise yourself if you just push yourself a bit more. Shy people can become great public speakers; we just need more practice and self-confidence. It also helps if you talk about something you're interested and well-informed in and if you shift the focus from yourself to those you're speaking to, since we internalize things a lot more than others.

Have a look at this:
http://www.ius.edu/shyness/faq/how-do-i-overcome-shyness.html

There're plenty of useful info. on the site, just browse around:
http://www.ius.edu/shyness/



Good luck.

@ yield.. Thanks for your candour, but the topic of discussion is how to overcome shyness when toasting a girl not public speaking

@ poster, I used to be very shy so I understand your frustration.
In time, it will get easier, but in the meantime, try to just be who you are and seek out interests and passions in your life . You are not a fool but someone whos time will come. One day,you will be a wonderful partner to someone Im sure!

Enlightened1: @ yield.. Thanks for your candour, but the topic of discussion is how to overcome shyness when toasting a girl not public speaking

Mr., you should not be talking. YOUR reply has nothing to do with the OP. The irony.

Why does my reply bother you? I replied because I could relate to him. What I wrote and the links I provided would still be helpful to him. Whether he chooses to read and gain anything from the links is up to him. Shyness and public speaking are very related. Of course, you didn't know that, [b]UN[/b]Enlighthened1. You just wanted to run your mouth. =D